WE'RE BACK WITH THE HOST OF THE NEW PODCAST, HERE IT IS,

我們回來了，與新的播客的主機，這裡是。

"FANTASTIC! WITH DANA CARVEY," MR. DANA CARVEY.

"FANTASTIC!與DANA CARVEY，"MR. DANA CARVEY.DANA CARVEY.

ONE OF THE THINGS YOU TAUGHT ME, I FREQUENTLY IMPART WISDOM FROM

你教我的事情之一，我經常從智慧中分離出來。

DANA CARVEY THAT YOU GAVE ME TO YOUNG WRITERS AND COMEDIANS, AND

DANA CARVEY，你給了我年輕的作家和喜劇演員，還有。

ONE OF THEM IS YOU HAD THIS RULE WHICH IS FUNNY WITH A SOUND OFF.

其中之一是你有這樣的規則... ...有一個有趣的聲音。

>> IF POSSIBLE.

>> 如有可能：

>> Stephen: EXPLAIN TO THE PEOPLE WHAT FUNNY WITH THE

>> 史蒂芬：向人們解釋一下什麼是有趣的與

SOUNDOFF MEANS.

SOUNDOFF的意思是：

>> FUNNY WITH THE SOUNDOFF GIVES THE AUDIENCE PERMISSION TO LAUGH

>> 伴隨著音響效果的FUNNY給了觀眾笑的權利。

IN AN UNBRIDLED WAY, AND WHEN YOU DO -- YOU KNOW, LITERAL

以一種無障礙的方式，而當你這樣做 - 你知道，真正的

PUNCH LICENSE, THEY HAVE TO WAIT FOR THE PUNCHLINE AND THEY

衝鋒鎗，他們必須等待衝鋒線，而他們也必須等待。

LAUGH.

笑。

CASE IN POINT, I THOUGHT ABOUT THIS, WHEN WE DID THE FIRST JOHN

舉個例子，我想過這個問題，當我們做了第一次的約翰

BOLTON ON YOUR SHOW -- >> Stephen: YES.

BOLTON ON YOUR SHOW -->> Stephen: Yes.

-- THERE IS A LOT OF WHAT WE CALL "I LOVE LUCY," THAT WAS THE

-- 有很多我們稱之為 "我愛露西 "的東西，那是... ...

KIND OF ORIGINAL SHE'S PUTTING THE CHOCOLATES IN THE THING, SO

她把巧克力放進那東西里，真有創意。

WE DON'T NEED TO WAIT FOR ANYTHING.

我們不需要等待任何事情。

WE CAME BACK, BOLTON'S MUSTACHE WAS BIGGER AND YOU AND I WOULD

我們回來了，BOLTON的鬍子更大了，而你和我都會。

JUST NOT REACT TO IT.

只是不對它作出反應。

>> Stephen: RIGHT.

>> Stephen:右邊。

O THAT WAS FUNNY WITH THE SOUNDOFF.

哦，這是有趣的聲音關閉。

FIRM, THERE WAS QUITE A LOT OF LAUGHTER THAT NIGHT.

公司，那天晚上有很多笑聲。

>> Stephen: BUT YOU'RE DOING THE PODCAST NOW AND THE THE

>> 但你現在做的是視頻直播，而不是視頻節目。

SOUND, THE ONLY THING YOU GET -- NO SOUND, NO FUNNY, HOW DOES

THAT AFFECT THE WAY YOU APPROACH >> WELL, THEN YOU GO BACK IN

影響了你的方法 >> 好吧，那你就回去吧。

TIME.

時間。

THEN IT'S LONG-TERM RHYTHMS AND LONG-TERM SORT OF RIFFING ON THE

然後，它是長期的韻律和長期的排序上的RIFFING。

HIGH SCHOOL WATER POLO COACH WHILE YOUR FRIENDS ARE STONED IN

高中水球教練，而你的朋友們卻被石塊砸死了

THE VOLKSWAGEN BUG AND YOU'RE IN THE BACK SEAT.

大眾的蟲子，而你卻坐在後座上。

SO NO ONE CAN SEE YOU BUT YOU'RE JUST GOING ON AND ON.

所以，沒有人可以看到你，但你只是繼續和繼續。

AND IN THE PODCAST WORLD, A LOT OF PEOPLE'S EARPLUGS, YOU'RE

而在PODC廣播世界，很多人的耳塞，你是

JUST GOING RIGHT INTO THEIR BRAIN RHYTHMICALLY.

只是直接進入他們的大腦RHYTHMICALLY。

THAT BEING SAID, WE'RE TAKING A BREAK AND GOING TO PUT A LOOSE

話雖如此，我們要休息一下，去把一個鬆散的。

VIDEO CAMERA ON THE SHOW.

視頻攝影機在節目中。

SO THANKS FOR BRINGING IT.

所以，謝謝你把它帶來。

FANTASTIC.

夢幻般的。

( LAUGHTER ) THE INTERVIEW IS GOING

（笑） 採訪是怎麼回事。

ALTERNATIVE FACT SO FAR AND THAT'S A SINCERE FANTASTIC.

異樣的事實這麼樣，這是一任一某一辛勤的奇觀。

>> Stephen: I THOUGHT SO, TOO.

>> 史蒂芬：我也這麼認為。

I DIDN'T MEAN TO UNDERMINE YOU.

我不是故意要破壞你。

>> WHAT?

>> 什麼？

>> Stephen: YOU'RE SO FULL OF WISDOM IN YOUR LIFE, YOU'RE

>> 史蒂芬：你的生活中充滿了智慧，你是一個很好的人。

ALWAYS IMPARTING WISDOM.

一直在傳授智慧。

I ALSO HAVE IMPARTED THIS TO PEOPLE -- YOUR THEORY AS TO WHY

我也曾向人們透露過這一點 -- 你的理論為什麼

HAVING CHILDREN AGES YOU RAPIDLY.

生孩子讓你迅速衰老。

DO YOU REMEMBER EXPLAINING THIS TO ME?

你還記得給我解釋過嗎？

AFTER THE CARVEY SHOW WAS OVER AND I CAME OUT AND WORKED WITH

在雕刻秀結束後，我出來和他們一起工作了。

YOU ON A MOVIE FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS, YOU WERE LIVING IN A

你在電影上拍了幾個月，你就住在電影院了

HOUSE ON POINT DOOM THAT HAD BEEN OWNED BY LIKE AN

POINT DOOM上的房子，已經擁有了像一個。

INTERNATIONAL ARMS DEALER.

國際軍火商。

>> YES.

>> 是。

>> Stephen: IT WAS ALL JUST LIKE GLASS AND GOLDEN SWANS

>> 斯蒂芬：這一切都像玻璃和金天鵝。

WHOSE WINGS WERE HOLDING UP TABLES AND --

誰的翅膀在舉著桌子和 -- --

>> SCAR FACE WOULD LIVE THERE, YEAH.

>> 疤臉會住在那裡，是的。

SCAR FACE WOULD HAVE LIVED IN THIS RENTAL, YES.

疤臉會一直住在這間租房，是的。

>> Stephen: AND IN IT ALL THESE GLASS TABLES HAD THESE

>> 史蒂芬: 所有這些玻璃桌裡都有這些。

SHARP EDGES, AND YOU SAID YOUR THEORY WAS -- BECAUSE YOU SEE

鋒芒畢露，你說你的理論是... ...因為你看到了。

DEXTER TOM COMING DOWN THE HALLWAY AND THEY BEGIN TO

DEXTER TOM從走廊上走來，他們開始了

STUMBLE, AND YOU PICTURE THEM GOING INTO THE TABLE AND BLOOD

跌倒，你想象他們進入桌子和血跡

EVERYWHERE AND YOUR ADRENAL SQUIRT BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO RUN

到處都是，你的性慾也在蠢蠢欲動，因為你必須要跑。

WITH YOUR SONS TO THE NEAREST HOSPITALS TO SAVE THEIR LIVES,

與您的兒子一起去最近的醫院，以挽救他們的生命。

THEY RECOVER, DON'T HIT THE TABLE, AND THE THE ADENLEN IS

他們恢復，不打表，和亞丁倫是。

STILL IN YOUR BODY.

還在你的身體裡。

>> NOW I REMEMBER TELLING YOU THAT AND YOU GOT VERY QUIET AND

>> 我記得我跟你說過，你卻很安靜，而且...

YOU SAID, I'M JUST GOING TO MY ROOM FOR A LITTLE BIT.

你說，我只是去我的房間一點點。

SO IT MUST HAVE AFFECTED YOU IN A VERY PROFOUND WAY.

所以它一定對你產生了深刻的影響。

>> Stephen: TRUE, I'VE THOUGHT OF IT EVER SINCE.

>> Stephen: TRUE, I've thought of it ever since.

>> THE OVERACTIVE IMAGINATION IS NOT GOOD.

>> 過度活躍的形象並不好。

>> Stephen: T THE ADRENALINE NEEDS TO DO SOMETHING ELSE SO IT

>> 斯蒂芬: 腎上腺素需要做一些其他的事情，所以它需要做一些其他的事情。

DEVOURS YOUR KIDNEY.

去你的腎臟。

>> CORRECT.

>> 正確。

YOU REMEMBER HOW FASCINATED YOU MADE MY KIDS FEEL WHEN YOU WENT

你還記得你去的時候，你讓我的孩子們有多興奮嗎？

INTO IS IT POOL.

進入是它的游泳池。

>> Stephen: NO, I DON'T REMEMBER.

>> 史蒂芬：不，我不記得了。

>> SO WE HAD THE SWIMMING POOL.

>> 所以我們有游泳池。

STEVE AND YOU, AT LEAST ON ONE OCCASION, WOULD GO TO THE BOTTOM

史蒂夫和你，至少有一次，會去底層。

TO HAVE THE POOL, SIT INDIAN STYLE AND HOLD ON TO THE DRAIN

要想擁有游泳池，請坐在印第安人風格的位置上，並抓住排水管。

AND YOU WOULD STAY DOWN THERE.

而你會留在那裡。

AND MY SONS ARE, LIKE, FOUR AND SIX, THEY'RE LOOKING DOWN AND

而我的兒子們，就像，4和6，他們正在看下來，並。

GO, WHEN'S HE GOING TO COME UP, DAD.

去，他什麼時候上來，爸爸。

HE'S SURE BEEN DOWN THERE A LONG TIME, DAD.

他肯定在下面呆了很久了，爸爸。

I GO, I DON'T KNOW WHEN HE'S COMING UP.

我走了，我不知道他什麼時候會來。

HE'S GOT A GILL OR SOMETHING.

他有一個鰓或什麼的。

YOU WOULD SIT THERE.

你會坐在那裡。

DO YOU REMEMBER THAT.

你還記得嗎？

>> Stephen: >> Stephen: I VAGUELY REMEMBER

>> Stephen:>> 史蒂芬：我依稀記得，我是說...

BEING SO ANXIOUS ABOUT MY LEVEL OF EMPLOYMENT WITH A WIFE AND A

我對自己的工作水準感到焦慮，因為我有一個妻子和一個孩子。

CHILD THAT I WAS PROBABLY DOWN THERE TO HIDE FROM THE WORLD,

我可能是去那裡躲避世界的孩子。

THAT THE WATER WOULD BURY ME.

水會把我淹死。

>> ANYWAY, I WANT TO THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMING ON.

>> 總之，我要感謝你的到來。

>> Stephen: I'M THRILLED TO BE ON "FANTASTIC! WITH DANA

>> Stephen: 我很高興能和DANA一起上《FANTASTIC!與DANA

CARVEY."

CARVEY。"

>> YOU WILL BE TORTURED AT SOME POINT.

>> 你會在某些時候被折磨。

I'M GOING TO HAVE YOU ON AND DIG DEEP.

我要讓你上並深入挖掘。

NOW, WHAT'S NEXT?

現在，下一步是什麼？

>> Stephen: ARE YOU INOCULATED?

>> 史蒂芬：你接種了嗎？

>> YEAH, I GOT JABBED TWICE.

>> 是的，我被打了兩次。

I TOOK IT TWICE.

我吃了兩次。

>> Stephen: AND TWO WEEKS SINCE YOUR LAST JAB.

>> 兩週前你的最後一擊。

>> PRETTY MUCH, I'M GOING TO SAY YES.

>> 很好，我會說 "是"。

>> Stephen: YOU'RE IMMORTAL THEN, NOTHING COULD KILL YOU AT

>> 你是不朽的，那麼，沒有什麼可以殺死你在。

THIS POINT.

這個點。

>> I DON'T KNOW.

>> 我不知道。

I MEAN, I DON'T REALLY BLAME MY FRIEND DR. FAUCI, BUT LET ME

我的意思是，我真的不責怪我的朋友博士。FAUCI博士，但讓我

TELL YOU SOMETHING, YOU KNOW, THERE'S VARIANCES, YOU KNOW.

告訴你一些事情，你知道，有各種不同的，你知道。

LOOK, I DIDN'T WANT THIS JOB, YOU KNOW, IT WAS A

聽著，我不想要這份工作，你知道，這是一個。

CIRCUMSTANCES, I AGREE.

情況下，我同意。

IT WAS TRUMP AND ME.

是特朗普和我。

GUESS WHO'S STILL STANDING?

猜猜誰還站在這裡？

ME.

我。

OKAY.

好的。

AT FIRST I SAID DON'T HAVE A MASK.

一開始我說不要戴面具。

NOW I'M SAYING HAVE A MASK.

現在我說有一個面具。

I GO FREE.

我去自由。

DON'T PUSH ME.

不要推我。

I GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU, I HOPE IT'S OKAY IF IT GOES ON A

我得跟你說實話，我希望它是好的，如果它去上一個。

FEW MORE MONTHS, I GET A GOOD TABLE, PEOPLE LOVE ME, I GET FAN

再過幾個月，我就能拿到一張好桌子，人們愛我，我就能得到粉絲。

MAIL, I GO ON CNN EVERY NIGHT, I FEEL PRETTY GOOD ABOUT MYSELF,

郵件，我每晚都上CNN，我覺得自己挺好的。

I'M GETTING FRICTIONY WITH MY WIFE.

我和我的妻子在一起，我變得很緊張。

IT'S A LOT DIFFERENT.

這有很多不同的地方。

SHE WAS HAVING SEX WITH ANTHONY FAUCI, NOW SHE'S BANGING A STAR!

她和安東尼-福西做愛，現在又和明星上床！

NOT MY MOST ACCURATE IMPRESSION.

不是我最準確的印象。

>> Stephen: I WAS SURPRISED TO LEARN NOW DR. FAUCI IS ONE TO

>> Stephen: 我很驚訝地得知現在Dr.FAUCI是一個

HAVE THE MEN WHO MURDERED LUCA L KABRATSI.

謀殺Luca L KABRATSI的男人們：

>> I SAID, PICK A PATH AND DO THE IMPRESSION.

>> 我說過，選一條路，然後做印象。

>> Stephen: YOU SAID, YOUR IMPRESSION DOES NOT HAVE TO

>> 斯蒂芬：你說過，你的印象不一定要。

SOUND LIKE THE PERSON.

聽起來像人。

>> JUST THE FEELING.

>> 只是感覺。

HERE'S MY OR GIN ON MY FAUCI.

這是我的ORGIN在我的FUCI。

I READ ABOUT HIM IN THE BASKETBALL TEAM.

我在籃球隊裡讀到過他的事。

HE'S 5'4:00".

他是5'4: 00"。

THEY SAID HE'S A ROUGH AND TUMBLE GUARD, ALWAYS FIGHTING.

他們說他是個粗暴的後衛，總是在打架。

I LOOK AT HIM, HE'S HEAD OF EPIDEMIOLOGY, SHARP ELBOWS.

我看著他，他是傳染病學的負責人，鋒利的肘部。

I THOUGHT, UNDERNEATH THAT NICE GUY SANETIST HE'S KIND OF A

我想，在那個好男人的背後... ...他是個好人... ...

TOUGH GUY, DON'T PLEEP WITH ME.

討厭的傢伙，不要和我上床。

YOU CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT.

你可以做任何我想要的。

FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART, STEPHEN, GO ( BLEEP ) YOURSELF

從我的心底，史蒂芬，你自己去吧。

>> Stephen: DO YOU HAVE A BIDEN?

>> 史蒂芬：你有投標嗎？

HAVE YOU WORKED ON YOUR BIDEN YET?

你已經對你的競標進行了工作嗎？

>> I HAVE SOME HOOKS.

>> 我有一些霍克。

>> Stephen: HE'S TOUGH.

>> 他很難纏。

WHAT'S YOUR HOOK?

你的釣餌是什麼？

WHO WANTS TO GO FIRST.

誰想先去。

>> Stephen: I DON'T REALLY HAVE A HOOK.

>> 我並沒有什麼好東西。

I'VE GOT THIS 1/2 SMILE.

我已經得到了這個1/2的微笑。

THAT'S IT, JACK.

就是這樣，傑克。

COME ON.

來吧。

EVERYBODY GET IN THE STOOD BAKER, ME AND JILL ARE GOING TO

大家都到木頭面包機裡來，我和吉爾要去。

TAKE YOU TO THE MALT SHOP.

帶你到馬耳他商店。

COME ON, EVERYBODY ON THE TRAIN!

來吧，每個人都在火車上！

>> YEAH, THAT'S GOOD.

>> 是的，這很好。

HIS VISUAL REMINDED ME -- BY THE WAY, THAT'S A FUNNY TAKE ON HIM,

他的影像讓我想起了... ... 順便說一句，這是對他的一個有趣的採取。

BECAUSE THAT'S PART OF HIM.

因為那是他的一部分。

I DO HIM AT THE TOWN HALL WHEN HE'S LIKE THE GENTLE FATHER TO

當他像個慈祥的父親時，我就會在市政廳裡做他

THE COUNTRY, AND HE LOOKS LIKE THE ALIEN WHO CAME OFF THE

國家，而他看起來像外星人誰離開了國家。

SPACESHIP IN CLOSE ENCOUNTERS -- >> Stephen: YES.

近距離接觸中的空間保護 -- -- >> Stephen：是的。

FOLKS, COME ON, FOLKS, LET'S GET REAL, I'M NOT KIDDING AROUND

夥計們，來吧，夥計們，讓我們得到真實的，我不是在開玩笑。

HERE.

這裡。

YOU KNOW, WE GOT TO DO THE THING.

你知道，我們必須做的事情。

WE DID BARACK, WE DID THE DEAL, YOU KNOW, AND, UH -- MY DAD, YOU

我們做了巴拉克，我們做了交易，你知道，而且，呃... ... 我的爸爸，你。

KNOW, MY DAD LOST HIS JOB IN SCRANTON, NO JOKE.

知道嗎，我爸爸在斯蘭頓丟了工作，不是開玩笑的。

NO JOKE, I'M NOT BEING A WISE GUY HERE.

不開玩笑，我不是一個聰明的傢伙在這裡。

HE SAID, POPS, WHY DID YOU LOSE.

他說，持久性有機汙染物，為什麼你失去了。

HE SAID, JOEY, I DID.

他說，喬伊，我做到了。

MOM SAID THE COOKIE CRUMBLES.

媽媽說，餅乾崩潰。

HERE'S THE DEAL.

這裡的交易。

NUMBER ONE THE THING THAT THEY SAID.

他們說的第一件事。

NUMBER TWO, THE TWO PART.

第二號，第二部分。

FOLKS, THREE.

夥計們，三。

COME ON, I'M NOT KIDDING AROUND.

來吧，我不是在開玩笑。

NO ROCKET SCIENCE.

沒有火箭科學。

HERE'S THE DEAL, COME ON, NOW.

這裡的交易，來吧，現在。

HE TOLD -- HE KNEW, HE KNEW IT FLOATED.

他說... 他知道，他知道它浮動。

HE TOLD BOB WOODWARD, JOANNE WOODWARD.

他告訴鮑勃・伍德沃德， 喬安妮・伍德沃德。

HE TOLD BOB REDFORD -- EXCUSE ME.

他告訴BOB REDFORD... - 不好意思

YOU KNOW, BUT, FOLKS, I CARE.

你知道，但是，夥計們，我關心。

I CARE A LOT.

我很關心。

PEOPLE ARE SUFFERING, AND I DO.

人們在受苦，我也在受苦。

AND MY MOTHER SAID, YOU KNOW, THAT'S THE WAY THE COOKIE IS.

我媽媽說，你知道，這就是餅乾的方式。

THAT'S HOW IT GOES, THOSE PLACES.

就是這樣，這些地方。

YOU KNOW, WE CAN DO THESE SHOTS.

你知道，我們可以做這些鏡頭。

WE CAN IN FACT DO BETTER THAN WE DID BEFORE.

事實上，我們可以做得比以前更好。

SO I DO THE SINCERE GUY.

所以，我做了罪人。

>> Stephen: I LOVE IT.

>> 史蒂芬：我愛它。

THAT'S SO BEAUTIFUL.

這真是太美了。

>> GREAT.

>> 太好了。

BUT THERE'S A LOT THERE, YOU KNOW, IF YOU JUST DON'T WORRY

但那裡有很多東西，你知道，如果你不擔心的話。

ABOUT THE FACT THAT HE'S 78, HE GETS A LITTLE CONFUSED

關於他78歲的事實，他有點迷惑了

SOMETIMES.

有時。

IT DOESN'T MEAN YOU'RE ATTACKING HIM PERSONALLY.

這並不意味著你在攻擊他個人。

BUT YOU HAVE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT, YOU KNOW, HE'S -- WE'RE

但你必須知道，你知道，他是 - 我們是

GOING TO TRY, WE'RE DOING THINGS, YOU KNOW.

去嘗試，我們正在做的事情，你知道的。

YOU KNOW, COME ON.

你知道，來吧。

HERE'S THE DEAL, LET ME -- LET ME JUST -- I'M NOT KIDDING

這裡的交易，讓我 - 讓我只是 - 我不是在開玩笑。

AROUND, NO JOKE, FOLKS.

圍繞，不開玩笑，夥計們。

MY DAD LOST HIS JOB IN SCRANTON.

我爸爸在SCRANTON丟了工作。

I LOST MY DOG.

我失去了我的狗。

I'M NOT KIDDING, I'M NOT BEING A WISE GUY.

我不是在開玩笑，我不是在做一個聰明的人。

AND HE ALWAYS DOES THE LIST.

他總是做的名單。

NUMBER ONE, THE ONE PART, NUMBER TWO, WHAT THEY SAID.

第一部分，第一部分，第二部分，他們說了什麼。

NUMBER THREE, YOU GET THE DRILL.

三號，你得到的鑽。

IT'S NOT PONY SOLDIER.

這不是小馬兵。

THAT'S NOT GOOD.

這不是很好。

THAT'S WHAT THE PEOPLE SAID.

這就是人們所說的。

SO THAT'S WHAT I'M GATHERING FROM IT VISUALLY.

所以這就是我從視覺上得到的資訊。

BUT, YEAH, IT'S A CHARACTER NOW.

但是，是的，這是一個角色了。

IT WAS BIDEN.

它是競標的。

IT WAS MORE OVER THE TOP THAN MY IMPRESSION, GO ( BLEEP )

它比我的想象力更過癮，去（嗶）。

YOURSELF!

你自己！

HE SAYS IT DIFFERENT EVERY TIME.

他每次都說的不一樣。

>> Stephen: WE HAVE TO TAKE ANOTHER BREAK BUT DON'T GO AWAY.

>> 我們必須再休息一下，但不要離開。

WE'LL BE BACK WITH MORE DANA CARVEY.

我們會帶著更多的DANA CARVEY回來。

♪♪♪

♪♪♪