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  • - Daryl, I looked my woman in the eye sockets.

    - 達里爾,我看著我女人的眼窩。

  • - Mm-hmm. - I told her straight out.

    - 我直接告訴她了。- 我直接告訴她了。

  • I just said it, man.

    我只是說了,夥計。

  • I said it, I said, I said, I said-

    我說過了,我說過了,我說過了,我說過了--。

  • I said, "Bi-" - Hey guys!

    我說:"比...

  • - Hey girl, how you doing! - Oh, hey!

    - 嘿,女孩,你怎麼做!- 哦,嘿!

  • - You having a good time? - You having-

    - 你有一個好時機?- 你有...

  • Oh, I want you

    哦,我想你

  • But I don't need you

    但我不需要你

  • - Neil.

    - 尼爾

  • Neil!

    尼爾!

  • - Yes, honey?

    - 什麼事,親愛的?

  • - Neil DeGrasse Tyson,

    - Neil DeGrasse Tyson

  • I asked you to take the dog out for a walk

    我叫你帶狗出去走走,你說呢?

  • when I left the house four hours ago.

    四小時前我離開家的時候

  • Now, I come back and this little mother (beep) Sputnik

    現在,我回來了,這個小媽媽(嗶)斯普特尼克。

  • has done pissed on my drapes!

    已經做了小便在我的窗簾!

  • Now, I've gotta get rid of those things and get new ones.

    現在,我得把這些東西扔掉,買新的。

  • Neil, it doesn't make any sense.

    尼爾,這沒有任何意義。

  • You're an astrophysicist.

    你是一個天體物理學家。

  • How can you not keep track of little details like this?

    這樣的小細節,你怎麼能不記錄呢?

  • - Well, actually, it's the little details

    - 嗯,其實,這是小細節

  • that cannot be kept track of by definition.

    無法通過定義追蹤的。

  • In 1927, a German university lecturer

    1927年,一位德國大學講師

  • named Warner Heisenberg, came to a seemingly

    名為華納-海森堡的人,來到了一個看似。

  • paradoxical conclusion, that the more we know

    矛盾的結論是我們知道的越多

  • about the position of a particle in physical space,

    關於粒子在物理空間的位置。

  • the less we know about its momentum and vice versa.

    我們就越不知道它的動量,反之亦然。

  • - Okay, but what does that have to-

    - 好吧,但那有什麼用...

  • - Taken in conjunction with what we know

    - 結合我們所知道的

  • about the expansion of the universe,

    關於宇宙的膨脹。

  • this brings us to a fascinating possibility.

    這給我們帶來了一種迷人的可能性。

  • That maybe what we experience as one point in time space

    那也許就是我們所經歷的一個時間點的空間吧

  • could actually be a legion of points,

    其實可以是一個軍團的點。

  • which would mean that your curtains

    這將意味著你的窗簾

  • and little Sputnik's pee pee could be as distant

    和小斯巴尼克的尿尿可能一樣遙遠

  • from one another as we are from the furthest galaxy.

    就像我們離最遠的星系一樣。

  • - Okay.

    - 好吧,我知道了

  • Well, just, next time.

    好吧,只是,下一次。

  • - Of course, dear.

    - 當然,親愛的。

  • - Neil!

    - 尼爾!

  • There you are.

    你在這裡啊

  • What are you doing?

    你在做什麼?

  • We have to go to my Aunt Nellie's funeral.

    我們要去參加我姑姑Nellie的葬禮。

  • How are you not ready?

    你怎麼還沒準備好?

  • I've been talking to you about this all week.

    我已經跟你說了一個星期了。

  • How am I gonna find you in your boxers

    我怎麼才能找到你的內褲呢?

  • looking at a science magazine?

    在看一本科學雜誌?

  • (sighs) I swear, Neil, sometimes I think

    我發誓,尼爾,有時候我覺得... ...

  • you don't have any idea of what's important.

    你根本不知道什麼是重要的。

  • - Well, actually, an idea of what's important

    - 嗯,實際上,一個想法 什麼是重要的

  • is as close as we can ever come

    咫尺天涯

  • to any definition of importance.

    任何重要性的定義。

  • Our galaxy is one of over 100 billion

    我們的星系是一千多億個星系中的一個

  • in the observable universe.

    在可觀測的宇宙中。

  • And, it's 100,000 light years across,

    而且,它的直徑有十萬光年。

  • which means it would take light 100,000 years to traverse.

    這意味著需要光10萬年才能穿越。

  • - Okay, but-

    - 好吧,但是...

  • - But that's just space.

    - 但這只是空間。

  • If we were to chart the history of the universe

    如果我們要描繪宇宙的歷史

  • on one calendar year,

    在一個日曆年內。

  • the history of mankind as we know it

    人文史料

  • would just take place in the final second of that year.

    會只是發生在當年的最後一秒。

  • So, whether I'm ready now or in 500 years,

    所以,不管是現在還是五百年後,我都已經準備好了。

  • well, cosmically speaking, the distinction is meaningless.

    好吧,從宇宙的角度來說,這種區別是沒有意義的。

  • - Well, okay.

    - 好吧,好吧。

  • I'm going now.

    我現在就去。

  • - Goodbye, honey.

    - 再見,親愛的。

  • - Neil!

    - 尼爾!

  • Who is she?

    她是誰?

  • Who is the white bitch that left this goddamn

    誰是那個離開這個該死的白人婊子?

  • lipstick stain on your collar?

    領口上有口紅的痕跡?

  • Hm?

    嗯?

  • Oh, I got you!

    哦,我抓住你了!

  • You're caught.

    你被抓了

  • Because this is apricot colored,

    因為這是杏色的。

  • and you know who wears that?

    你知道是誰穿的嗎?

  • White bitches!

    白人婊子!

  • And you can't talk your way out of this one,

    你不能說你的方式來解決這個問題。

  • 'cause I'm not getting confused today,

    因為我今天沒有被搞糊塗。

  • 'cause I got my (beep) in order

    "因為我有我的(嗶嗶聲)秩序

  • and I've done my research.

    我已經做了我的研究。

  • Okay, Neil?

    好嗎,尼爾?

  • You see, we are here at this point in space time

    你看,我們現在在這裡,在這個空間時間點上

  • on a human scale,

    在人的範圍內。

  • but at this point you a trifling ass mother (beep),

    但在這一點上,你一個瑣碎的屁股母親(嗶)。

  • so expect the papers from my lawyer,

    所以希望我的律師能給我文件

  • 'cause we're parting ways.

    因為我們要分道揚鑣了

  • - Well, actually.

    - 其實

  • - No, no.

    - 不,不。

  • - We are always parting ways and not parting ways

    - 我們總是分分合合,不分不合。

  • and every conceivable combination.

    和各種可以想象的組合。

  • Many physicists, including Stephen Hawking,

    許多物理學家,包括霍金。

  • now believe that there is an infinite number of universes.

    現在相信有無限多的宇宙。

  • It's called multiverse theory,

    這就是所謂的多元宇宙理論。

  • and it suggests that there are

    而且它表明,有

  • an infinite number of universes

    無數個宇宙

  • in which I didn't have sex with that white woman.

    在其中,我沒有與那個白人婦女發生性關係。

  • - I (beep) Bill Nye the Science Guy.

    - 我是科學小子比爾-奈。

  • - You bitch.

    - 你這個賤人

  • (doorbell rings)

    (門鈴響)

  • - Hey, hey, hey! - Hey!

    - 嘿,嘿,嘿!

  • - All right. - Hi sweetie.

    - 好吧,我知道了- 嗨,親愛的。

  • That's for you. - Hey Trace, how you doin'?

    這是給你的。- 嘿,Trace,你好嗎?

  • - Check out the house! - Oh my!

    - 看看這房子!- 哦,我的天!

  • - Girl, I got a sunk in tube, you gotta see it!

    - 姑娘,我有一個沉在管子裡的東西,你一定要看看!

  • - Oh, I've got to see this.

    - 哦,我得看看這個。

  • - All right. - You two

    - 好吧,你們兩個- 你們兩個

  • have a good time now. - Have fun, have fun!

    有一個很好的時間了。- 玩得開心,玩得開心!

  • Dude, I am sorry we're late!

    夥計,對不起,我們遲到了!

  • - Man, it happens man.

    - 男人,它發生的人。

  • - Man, she talked about how we were supposed

    - 男人,她說我們應該如何

  • to be in the car at 6:45,

    要在6點45分上車。

  • I'm like, "All right." - Uh oh!

    我想,"好吧。"- 呃,哦!

  • - Tell me my dumbass ain't sitting in the car

    - 告訴我,我的蠢蛋不是坐在車內

  • waiting until 7:15. - Nuh-uh!

    等到7: 15。- Nuh -uh!

  • - Okay, when I tracked my wife down 20 minutes later,

    - 好吧,當我20分鐘後追蹤到我妻子的時候,

  • she's stepping out the damn shower,

    她走出該死的淋浴。

  • talkin' 'bout, "Can I help you?"

    說著說著,"我能幫你嗎?"

  • - See, that's crazy right there.

    - 你看,那是瘋狂的權利在那裡。

  • - Craig, I looked this woman in the eye, I said,

    - 克雷格,我看著這個女人的眼睛,我說。

  • "Bitch, you told me 6:45!"

    "賤人,你告訴我6:45!"

  • - You said that? - (scoffs) Yeah, I said,

    - 你說的?- (嘲笑)是的,我說。

  • "Bitch!"

    "賤人!"

  • Then I laid it out. - Yeah, but you said

    然後我把它擺出來。- 是的,但你說

  • bitch though?

    婊子,雖然?

  • - Hmm?

    - 嗯?

  • - You said bitch?

    - 你說婊子?

  • - Yeah.

    - 是啊。

  • - [Woman] You gotta see the fire place

    - 你得看看這火塘

  • downstairs in the living room.

    樓下的客廳裡。

  • - Okay.

    - 好吧,我知道了

  • Don't play games man, just tell me what you gonna tell me!

    別玩了,告訴我你要告訴我什麼!

  • - Exactly, it's like, say what you mean, mean what you say!

    - 沒錯,這就像,說你的意思,就是你說的意思!

  • - Is that so hard?

    - 有這麼難嗎?

  • - It's like last week man,

    - 這就像上週的人。

  • we going out to dinner, right?

    我們要出去吃飯,對不對?

  • I'm like, "Where do you wanna go?"

    我想,"你想去哪裡?"

  • She's like, "You decide." - Uh-oh!

    她說:"你決定吧"- 嗯,哦!

  • - I'm like, "All right, Outback Steakhouse."

    - 我想,"好吧,Outback牛排館。"

  • She like, "Nah." - Mm-hmm.

    她喜歡,"不"。- Mm -hmm.

  • - I'm like, "Straight up, Chili's."

    - 我說:"直說吧,Chili's。"

  • She's like, "Ehh."

    她的樣子,"Ehh。"

  • - No. - No.

    - 號 - 號

  • Darryl, I named seven more restaurants!

    達里爾,我又說出了七家餐廳的名字!

  • - No Craig, no!

    - 不,克雷格,不!

  • - I finally said Taylor's.

    - 我終於說了泰勒的。

  • - The place I know she wants to go in the first place.

    - 我知道她一開始想去的地方。

  • - Right, right! - She looked at me, she said,

    - 對,對!- 她看著我,她說。

  • "If that's where you wanna go."

    "如果那是你想去的地方。"

  • - No she didn't Craig!

    - 不,她沒有克雷格!

  • - If that's where I wanna go.

    - 如果那是我想去的地方

  • Darryl, I looked my woman in the eye sockets.

    若曦,我看著我女人的眼窩。

  • - Mm-hmm. - I told her straight out.

    - 我直接告訴她了。- 我直接告訴她了。

  • I just said it man.

    我只是說,男人。

  • I said it, I said, I said, I said,

    我說了,我說了,我說了,我說了。

  • I said, "Bi-" - Hey guys.

    我說:"比..." 嘿,夥計們。

  • - Hey girl, how you doing! - Oh, hey!

    - 嘿,女孩,你怎麼做!- 哦,嘿!

  • - You having a good time? - You having fun?

    - 你有一個好時機?- 你玩得開心嗎?

  • - You seen the bedroom? - We was just looking

    - 你看到臥室了嗎?- 我們只是在看

  • at the water. - You see the washing machine?

    在水。- 你看到洗衣機了嗎?

  • A washer machine, it's huge! - Water up on the

    一臺洗衣機,好大啊!- 上水了

  • ceiling here. - You get a whole bunch of

    這裡的天花板。- 你會得到一大堆的

  • clothes in that washing machine!

    洗衣機裡的衣服!

  • - Baby, I'ma take her back up to the kitchen

    - 親愛的,我帶她回廚房了

  • and show her the dish washer.

    並給她看洗碗機。

  • - Darryl? - Yeah, baby?

    - 達里爾?- 什麼事,寶貝?

  • - I want a kitchen island just like the one upstairs.

    - 我想要一個和樓上一樣的廚房島。

  • - You gone' get it too.

    - 你也去拿吧

  • - I love you.

    - 我愛你

  • - I love you!

    - 我愛你!

  • - I said, "Bitch,

    - 我說:"賤人。

  • "if you wanted to go to Taylor's,

    "如果你想去泰勒的,

  • "just tell a brother you wanna go to Taylor's!"

    "告訴一個兄弟你想去泰勒家!"

  • Okay? - You know what I'm saying!

    你知道我在說什麼嗎?- 你知道我在說什麼!

  • You said that? - Oh, hell yeah man!

    你說的?- 哦,地獄般的男人!

  • - Yeah! - I laid it out!

    - 是啊!- 我把它擺出來了!

  • Right, I says, I says, I says,

    對,我說,我說,我說。

  • I said, "Bitch, I'm the man of the house!"

    我說:"賤人,我是家裡的男人!"

  • - You said bitch though?

    - 你說婊子?

  • - Mm-hmm.

    - 嗯哼。

  • - You called your wife a bitch?

    - 你說你老婆是婊子?

  • - Aw yeah.

    - 哦,是的。

  • - Craig? - Darryl?

    - 克雷格?- 達里爾?

  • Where are those guys?

    那些人在哪裡?

  • - [Woman] I don't know.

    - [女人]我不知道。

  • Girl, let me show you this.

    女孩,讓我給你看這個。

  • - [Darryl] So, she's like,

    - [達里爾]所以,她的樣子。

  • "Why don't you rent a movie we both like?"

    "你為什麼不租一部我們都喜歡的電影?"

  • - [Craig] No she didn't! - [Darryl] After I spent

    - [克雷格]不,她沒有!- [達里爾]之後,我花了

  • 25 minutes in the goddamn Blockbuster's!

    25分鐘就到了該死的百視達!

  • Craig, I looked this woman in her optic stems

    克雷格,我看了一下這個女人的視杆

  • and I says, I said,

    我說,我說。

  • I says, "Bitch!"

    我說,"婊子!"

  • - You said that?

    - 你說的?

  • - Ain't nothin' but a thing!

    - 什麼都不是,只是個東西!

  • - But, you said bitch though?

    - 但是,你說的婊子,雖然?

  • - Yep.

    - 是的。

  • - (laughs) See, you got it.

    - (笑)看,你明白了。

  • (phone rings)

    (電話鈴聲)

  • (phone rings) - Oh man!

    哦,天哪!

  • Hey honey, Craig just gave me the neighborhood tour.

    嘿,親愛的,克雷格剛剛給我介紹了附近的旅遊。

  • - So then, she's like, "I didn't know

    - 所以,她就說:"我不知道...

  • "we'd be doing so much walking."

    "我們會做這麼多的步行。"

  • - Nuh-uh! - I'm like,

    - 我喜歡。

  • "I didn't tell you to wear those shoes."

    "我沒讓你穿這雙鞋。"

  • She said, "Don't raise your voice at me."

    她說:"不要對我大聲說話。"

  • - What?

    - 什麼?

  • - Darryl!

    - 達里爾!

  • I looked this woman

    我看了這個女人

  • dead in the windows of her soul!

    死在她靈魂的窗口!

  • I said,

    我說。

  • I said-

    我說...

  • (door opens)

    (門打開)

  • (Craig knocks)

    (克雷格敲)

  • I said, "Bitch!"

    我說:"婊子!"

  • (romantic music)

    (浪漫音樂)

  • - Ooh honey, I am tired!

    - 哦,親愛的,我累了!

  • I am going to bed, goodnight.

    我要去睡覺了,晚安。

  • - Uh, well. (laughs)

    - 呃,好吧。(笑)

  • - Is everything okay?

    - 一切都好嗎?

  • - Well, it's just that I was hoping that,

    - 嗯,這只是我希望。

  • well, that we could,

    好吧,我們可以。

  • and, I wanna make this clear,

    還有,我想把話說清楚

  • I wanna be straight forward.

    我想直截了當。

  • I want to have a-

    我想有一個-

  • - Okay, Luther,

    - 好吧,盧瑟

  • are you available to translate?

    你可以翻譯嗎?

  • - Yes ma'am.

    - 是的,夫人。

  • - I really was hoping we could spend some time together.

    - 我真的很希望我們能在一起度過一些時間。

  • - When is the last time we had sex woman?

    - 我們最後一次做女人是什麼時候?

  • When, election night?

    什麼時候,選舉之夜?

  • What does a brother not named Bill Clinton

    一個不叫比爾-克林頓的兄弟是什麼

  • have to do to get some (beep) in this house?

    必須做一些(嗶)在這所房子?

  • - Well, you have been very busy lately.

    - 嗯,你最近很忙。

  • - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, you know what,

    - 嗯,嗯,嗯,嗯,你知道嗎?

  • if I could just, can we get your translator?

    如果我可以,我們可以得到你的翻譯?

  • - Oh yes, certainly.

    - 哦,是的,當然。

  • Katendra?

    Katendra?

  • - Yeah, honey?

    - 是的,親愛的?

  • - Could you please translate,

    - 請你翻譯一下。

  • "Well, you've been very busy lately."?

    "嗯,你最近很忙。"?

  • - Sure.

    - 當然可以

  • - My (beep) ain't one of your limousines

    - 我的(嗶)不是你的豪華轎車之一。

  • that you can jump in and out of whenever you feel like!

    你可以隨時跳進跳出!

  • I don't see you all day,

    我一天都見不到你。

  • then you want a booty call?

    那你要不要打炮?

  • I need an emotional connection (beep)!

    我需要一種情感上的聯繫(嗶)!

  • - Thought this was romantic.

    - 覺得這很浪漫。

  • - I'm (beep) trying bitch!

    - 我正在努力,婊子!

  • Can't you see?

    你看不出來嗎?

  • I'm playing the romantic music!

    我在放浪漫的音樂!

  • I got the pino in the glasses!

    我的眼鏡裡有皮諾!

  • What more do you want from me,

    你還想從我這裡得到什麼。

  • an engraved invitation from my nuts?

    我的蛋蛋送來的刻字邀請函?

  • - Maybe, we should make a date.

    - 也許,我們應該做一個日期。

  • - What am I supposed to do,

    - 我應該怎麼做。

  • jump outta my clothes every time

    衣服都快掉光了