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  • I am surprised.

    我太驚訝了

  • Shaquille O'Neil, in the movie.

    俠客‧歐尼爾竟然演電影

  • And it surprised me, because I've met him a bunch of times,

    我太震驚了 因為我見過他幾次

  • and he's such a funny guy.

    他蠻幽默的

  • And you put him in a movie, you know, to be an actor.

    然後你把他擺到大螢幕 當演員

  • And he's funny.

    然後他很好笑

  • He's great.

    他很屌

  • He's funnier than any of us.

    他比我們任何人都風趣

  • Yeah.

    是呀

  • I swear to god.

    我向上天發誓

  • There's all comedians in the movie,

    電影中有很多喜劇演員

  • every time he does a scene.

    每次他拍完戲

  • Everybody walks away, and can go:

    大家各自離開後 就會說

  • "Shaq is funnier than me."

    「俠客竟然比我好笑」

  • He's like the nicest, greatest guy.

    他就是最好 最棒的傢伙

  • And we hang out with the Shaq,

    然後我們常常跟俠客鬼混

  • and we all play basketball.

    我們都打籃球

  • Everyone of us on the set.

    所有的劇組人員

  • That's right.

    這倒是真的

  • You're fanatic for basketball.

    你對籃球很狂熱

  • Yeah.

    是呀

  • You play it all the time.

    你隨時都在打

  • Yes, all the time.

    是的 隨時

  • And the Shaq's there, so we're like,

    然後俠客剛好在 所以我們就想

  • "Let's play ball with Shaq."

    「我們也來跟俠客打球」

  • So we play ball with Shaq.

    所以我們就跟俠客打球

  • Full court, running up and down,

    全場 我們跑上跑下

  • Shaq is swatting,

    俠客不斷蓋火鍋

  • Shaq's in our face,

    當著我們的臉蓋火鍋

  • and we're like "yes~~"

    然後我們就是 「爽~~」

  • So happy to get swatted.

    真高興能被蓋火鍋

  • It's an honor to be rejected by Shaq.

    能被俠客封蓋是一種榮幸

  • OK, then comes this thing.

    所以接著就有這件事

  • So we play basketball,

    我們打完籃球

  • we got to get back to the movie set.

    之後必須回到拍片現場

  • Shaq has to take a shower.

    俠客需要先沖個澡

  • So everyone's like "Alright, we'll see you later, Shaq."

    所以大家想 「好喔 那等下見 俠客」

  • In my head I'm like,

    但我腦中想的是

  • "I got to see Shaq's penis."

    「我一定得看看俠客的老二」

  • So.....

    所以.....

  • It's just, it's just not....

    這只是 不是.....

  • I can't pass up that opportunity.

    我不能錯過這個機會

  • You just mean for historical reasons.

    你的意思是 為了歷史性的意義

  • Yeah.

  • It's not a gay thing.

    這不是在搞基

  • It's just like.......

    這只是像.....

  • "You got to see that."

    「非得看不可」

  • It's like the Grand Canyon.

    這就跟大峽谷一樣

  • You got to see it.

    非看不可

  • You got to see it.

    絕對要看他一下

  • You can't live and not see it.

    你不能虛度人生 沒去看一下

  • I get this completely.

    我完全明白

  • Thank you.

    謝謝你

  • So,

    所以

  • my plan was to kind of.....

    我的計畫有點像是.....

  • I hear the shower going on in the back,

    我聽到後方傳來的沖澡聲

  • and I said,

    然後我就想

  • "Alright, I'm just going to...."

    「好 我就只要」

  • In the back of what?

    在什麼的後面?

  • In the locker room.

    在更衣室之中

  • I think you were like in his trailer or something.

    我以為你在他的拖車上之類的

  • No!

    不是

  • There's a gym we play basketball.

    我們有一個打籃球的健身房

  • Oh, OK, alright!

    喔 好 我知道了

  • So it's like in a high school,

    有點像在高中

  • and he showers in a way: he's just not being the Shaq down there in the showers.

    他在沖澡: 以一種不是俠客的方式在沖澡

  • Everyone else left.

    大家都走了

  • I'm like, "Alright, let me see that thing."

    我就想 「好 讓我看看俠客的那根」

  • So........

    所以.....

  • Oh boy!!

    啊 天呀

  • I'm going to see that!

    我要去看那東西了

  • Here we go!

    我來囉!

  • I go back there,

    所以我來到後方

  • I hear the shower,

    聽到沖澡聲

  • and I start......

    然後開始.....

  • I kind of turned around backwards,

    我有點轉過身

  • and walked backwards a little, like....

    然後背對著走 向.....

  • Walking backwards....

    倒著走.....

  • You want to look kind of.....

    你想要看起來.....

  • Like I was going to track him.

    像我在追蹤他

  • Like I walk backwards, and I saw, and I was like,

    就是我倒著走 然後就會看到 然後就會說

  • "Hey, what's up?"

    「嘿 怎麼了?」

  • And I....

    然後我.....

  • But no!

    但並不是的!

  • I'm walking backwards, doing my routine,

    我倒著走 照著計劃好的

  • getting closer to the shower,

    慢慢接近淋浴間

  • and I turn around.

    然後一個轉身

  • And I go, "Alright, I got to see Shaq's thing right now."

    我心裡想 「好 我現在總看得到俠客的老二了吧」

  • His bodyguard is there.

    但他的保鑣在那

  • And his bodyguard is just so strong and big.

    他的保鑣不但粗壯 又很巨大

  • And like his thick neck, bald head

    然後粗厚的頸子 光頭

  • And this one eye is looking at me with this one eye, alright.

    然後那個獨眼的人 就用著那唯一的眼睛盯著我

  • So I said,

    所以我說

  • "Sorry,

    抱歉

  • I was just trying to see Shaq's penis."

    我只是想看俠客的老二」

  • "I apologize, I'm out of here." "Please don;t tell Shaq."

    「我道歉 我馬上滾」 「拜託別跟俠客講」

  • So I see Shaq later on the set,

    我之後在拍片現場遇到俠客

  • and I was like,

    我就想說

  • "I guarantee that guy ratted me out."

    「我敢說那傢伙絕對會把我抖出來」

  • So I said,

    所以我就說

  • "Shaq, sorry about that before with your security guard"

    「俠客 抱歉之前跟你保鑣發生的事情」

  • And he goes,

    然後他說

  • "I don't got a security guard,

    「我沒有保鑣

  • that was my dick."

    那是我的老二」

  • Pretty good.

    哏鋪得不錯吧

  • It's terrible.

    這太糟糕了!

  • That's terrible.

    太糟糕了!

I am surprised.

我太驚訝了

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A2 初級 中文 美國腔 TeamCoco 老二 籃球 好笑 演員 現場

【conan o'brien 脫口秀】亞當山德勒來啦!想偷看俠客的老X,結果卻悲劇了!(中英文字幕)( Adam Sandler Really Wants To See Shaq's Junk - CONAN on TBS)

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    Colin Lin 發佈於 2014 年 08 月 07 日
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