♪ She dips beneath lasers ♪

? 她浸在脈衝光之下?

♪ Oh, oh, oh ♪

* Oh, oh, oh *

♪ You got to, you got to, you got to ♪

你一定要，你一定要，你一定要

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Woo, let's do this, boys!

- 嗚，讓我們做到這一點，男孩！

Looking swole, looking good, good luck out there.

看起來很好，看起來很好，祝你好運。

I believe in all of us.

我相信我們所有人。

We're all gonna take a trophy home.

我們都會帶一個獎盃回家。

- You the mascot for the competition or something?

- 你是比賽的吉祥物還是什麼？

- Are you the mascot for the competition or something?

- 你是比賽的吉祥物還是什麼？

Do we have beef already, dude?

我們已經有牛肉了嗎，夥計？

- Just be careful out there, all right?

- 在外面要小心，好嗎？

- Careful? I never am.

- 小心點？我從不小心

Woo!

嗚！

(Adam groaning)

（亞當呻吟）

- Welcome to

- 歡迎來到

the Tri-Valley Amateur Bodybuilder's Competition.

三谷業餘健美運動員的比賽。

Give it up for our contenders.

放棄我們的競爭者。

(audience applauding) (triumphant orchestral music)

(觀眾鼓掌) (勝利的交響樂)

- Dude, that's Barry.

- 夥計，那是巴里。

I sold that guy a garbage bag full of growth hormones.

我賣給那個傢伙一個裝滿生長激素的垃圾袋。

Aye, you're looking huge, Barry!

你看起來好大啊，巴里！

- [Anders] Wow, this is pathetic.

- [安德斯]哇，這是可憐的。

Adam looks like a baby man up there.

亞當在上面看起來像個小男人

(heavy metal music)

(重金屬音樂)

(Adam yelling)

（亞當大喊）

- Please welcome to the stage our next contestant.

- 有請下一位選手上臺。

He's 5'8", weighing in at 240 pounds,

他身高5尺8寸，體重240磅。

well, that can't be right.

好了，這不可能是正確的。

Adam "The Snake" Roberts DeMamp!

亞當 "蛇 "羅伯茨-德曼普!

- All right. - Here we go.

- 好吧，我們開始吧。- 在這裡，我們去。

(chill hip hop music)

（寒冷的嘻哈音樂）

(Adam grunting)

（亞當叫聲）

(Adam making weird noises)

（亞當發出奇怪的聲音）

- You know what, I stand corrected.

- 你知道嗎，我站在糾正。

The guy is a showman.

這傢伙是個戲子。

- [Karl] His body is looking tight.

- [卡爾]他的身體看起來很緊。

(audience laughing)

（觀眾笑）

(Adam grunting) (audience laughing)

（亞當叫聲）（觀眾笑）。

- Okay, that's not good.

- 好吧，這不是很好。

- What are you laughing at?

- 你在笑什麼？

I'm yoked!

我被綁住了！

- Don't laugh at my friend.

- 不要笑我的朋友。

Okay, only I laugh at my friend.

好吧，只有我笑我的朋友。

He's got like 10 times more the bravery than you.

他的勇氣是你的十倍。

I don't see you with your shirt off.

我沒看到你脫了衣服的樣子。

You probably got big, dark nipples.

你可能有又大又黑的乳頭。

Adam, you keep doing what you're doing, bud.

亞當，你繼續做你正在做的事，夥計。

No, no, no, they're laughing out of respect.

不，不，不，他們是出於尊重而笑。

It's a respect laugh.

這是一種尊重的笑。

Howie Mandel gets them all the time.

豪伊-曼德爾總是能得到他們的幫助。

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- [Blake] Oh, hey, what's up, Adam.

- [布雷克]哦，嘿，這是怎麼回事，亞當。

You are looking straight jacked, dude.

你在看直挺挺的，夥計。

- I can't go to Hedonism.

- 我不能去海頓教。

I'm not gonna have a good time, I won't get laid.

我不會有一個好時機，我不會得到奠定。

- What, why? - Why is that?

- 什麼，為什麼？- 為什麼會這樣？

- Because my dick fell off! (everyone laughing)

- 因為我的雞巴掉了！（大家笑）

Oh, just kidding, I tucked it back,

開個玩笑，我把它塞回去了。

it actually hurts a lot.

其實很疼的。

My dick's back here though. ♪ Got to be fresh ♪

我的老二回來了，雖然。 必須是新鮮的

Hey Blake, film me. - Film what?

嘿，布雷克，拍我。- 拍什麼？

I'm gonna

我要去

♪ Ride the stairs and get pitted ♪

騎樓梯，得到坑害

♪ So pitted ♪

如此坑爹

- What'd you do?

- 你做了什麼？

(Adam yelling and groaning)

（亞當大喊大叫和呻吟）

- Tell me you got the footy on that one.

- 告訴我，你得到了腳上的那一個。

- No, not at all, I didn't even have my phone out.

- 不，一點也不，我連手機都沒拿出來。

You got to wait til I have my phone.

你得等我有了手機才行

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Welcome to "DeMamp Camp Fully Insured".

- 歡迎來到 "德曼普營全險"。

On this new edition,

在這個新版。

I'll be showing you a brand new exercise

我將向你展示一個全新的練習方法

that I just created using my own brain and intelligence.

我剛剛用自己的大腦和智慧創造的。

It's called the Roof Fly Delt Pump.

它的名字叫屋頂飛碟泵。

Basically, you get a running start,

基本上，你會得到一個運行的開始。

pump your delts so hard that you come to a nice soft landing

猛抽你的三角肌，讓你來一個漂亮的軟著陸。

because you've just flown for a few seconds.

因為你剛飛了幾秒鐘。

Let's do this!

來吧！

(Adam screeching) - Here we go, yeah!

我們走吧，耶！

(Adam groaning) - Oh, Adam!

哦，亞當！

- Blake, we get it?

- 布雷克，我們明白了嗎？

This next exercise, your bis might turn into tris,

接下來這個練習，你的二可能會變成三。

or your tris might turn into God knows what.

否則你的三叉戟可能會變成天知道的東西。

Are you ready?

你準備好了嗎？

(Adam groaning) (everyone groaning)

（亞當呻吟） （每個人都在呻吟）。

(screaming) My shoulders!

我的肩膀！

- We got to get you to a hospital!

- 我們得送你去醫院！

- I'm gonna pop them back into place!

- 我要把它們放回原處！

I'm gonna pop them back!

我要把它們彈回去！

(groaning) I made it so much worse!

（呻吟）我使它變得如此糟糕！

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Hey guys, hey guys.

- 嘿夥計們，嘿夥計們。

- Don't have sex with the Dodge Dart.

- 不要和道奇Dart發生性關係。

- I'm gonna dunk off the Volvo!

- 我要從沃爾沃上扣籃！

- [Anders] Hey, dude.

- [安德斯]嘿，夥計

- [Alice] Oh, watch the sunroof.

- [愛麗絲]哦，小心天窗.

(everyone groaning) (Alice giggling)

（每個人都在呻吟） （愛麗絲傻笑）。

- And one.

- 還有一個。

My nuts just ruptured. - What an idiot.

我的蛋蛋剛剛破裂。- 真是個白痴

It's out of the pouch. ♪ Got to be fresh ♪

從袋子裡拿出來了，一定要新鮮的

♪ Silent night ♪

寂靜的夜晚

(Adam crashing)

（亞當崩潰）

- [Adam] Oh!

- [亞當]哦！

- Every year!

- 每年都有！

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- [Blake] DeMamp (indistinct), what up, bro?

- [布雷克]德曼普（模糊不清），什麼了，兄弟？

Are you ready to rip?

你準備好開撕了嗎？

- I'm ready to rip!

- 我已經準備好了！

Actually, I'm very nervous.

其實，我很緊張。

I don't think I'm wearing enough padding,

我覺得我穿得不夠好

but I will die for you guys.

但我願意為你們而死。

- Freaking rock on.

- 該死的岩石上。

Ders, light it up, lets do this.

德爾斯，點燃它，讓我們做到這一點。

- Ready to go? Little worried.

- 準備好了？有點擔心。

- Ow!

- 嗷！

- Woo. Oh God! - You got this, DeMamp!

- 嗚。天啊! Oh God!- 你能行的 德曼普 You got this, DeMamp!

- Ders, punch it.

- 德爾斯，打它。

We're about to hit the jump.

我們就要開始跳了。

(Adam screaming)

（亞當尖叫）

- Whoa, dude!

- 哇，老兄！

How did you land that, dude?

你是怎麼登陸的，夥計？

Blake, tell me you got the shot.

布雷克，告訴我你拍到了。

- I got it, oh (yelling). Ow!

- 我得到了它，哦（大喊）。嗷！

- I mean, I knew today was gonna end with an ambulance ride,

- 我是說，我知道今天會以坐救護車結束。

I just didn't think Blake would be the one in it.

我只是沒想到布雷克會是其中的一個。

- What's that's supposed to mean?

- 那是什麼意思？

- Means you're always getting hurt.

- 意味著你總是受傷。

- Yeah right, Ders, I get hurt all the time.

- 是啊，德爾斯，我經常受傷。

- Dude, hey! ♪ Got to be fresh ♪

- 哥們兒，嘿嘿！ 必須是新鮮的！

- The thing everyone hates about Anders

- 每個人都討厭安德斯的事情

is his disrespect for women.

是他對女性的不尊重。

He treats chicks like second grade citizens

他把小雞當成二等公民

and they're not.

而他們不是。

Natalie Portman went to Harvard and she's smart as shit.

娜塔莉-波特曼上過哈佛，而且她聰明得不得了。

She's super smart.

她是超級聰明的。

- How did you get in here?

- 你怎麼進來的？

- If I were Anders,

- 如果我是安德斯

I'd punch you in the face for asking something like that.

你這樣問我，我會揍你的臉。

But I'm not.

但我不是。

Thank God I'm Adam and I love women, all women.

感謝上帝，我是亞當，我愛女人，所有的女人。

All shapes and sizes, I just love them.

各種形狀和大小，我就是喜歡它們。

Love them.

愛他們。

Blake asked me the other day how to spell "if".

前幾天Blake問我 "如果 "怎麼拼。

Gonna trust that level of smartness

要相信這種水準的聰明才智。

with a multi-thousand dollar corp?

與幾千美元的公司？

- Adam, I think we're done.

- 亞當，我想我們已經完成了。

- Oh, and Alice, it's I-F.

- 哦，愛麗絲，這是I -F。

I, if you didn't know.

我，如果你不知道。

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Hey. - What do you want?

- 嘿 你想要什麼？

- I just want to let you know that you're not alone.

- 我只是想讓你知道，你並不孤單。

We're here for you.

我們為你而來。

I'm here for you.

我是為你而來

- Have you made any sales today?

- 你今天有做什麼銷售嗎？

- Ooh, you are angry.

- 哦，你很生氣。

I like that.

我喜歡這樣

If I got divorced I'd probably be pretty angry too.

如果我離婚了，我可能也會很生氣。

First I'd have to get married,

首先我得結婚。

but then I'd get divorced.

但那樣我就會離婚。

You need to get back on the man horse, right.

你需要回到男人的馬背上，對吧。

'Cause I think I know a certain horse man

因為我想我認識一個騎馬的人。

that might want to take you out for a trot.

可能想帶你出去小跑。

- Are you seriously hitting on me right now?

- 你現在是認真的在勾引我嗎？

(Adam neighing)

(Adam neighing)

- No, I'm not.

- 不，我沒有。

That was my horse impression saying no.

這是我的馬印象說不。

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Ow.

- 嗷。

- I know.

- 我知道，我知道

The one day we need to focus and she had to temp.

有一天，我們需要關注，她不得不臨時。

- Don't mind me,

- 不用管我

I'll just be here with my breast and boobs

我就在這裡陪著我的乳房和胸部吧

being a girl as hot as possible.

作為一個女孩，儘可能的熱。

Freaking Austrians, like land down under.

怪異的奧地利人，就像在下面的土地。

- And you know she just dates the hottest dudes of all time.

- 你知道她只是和最性感的帥哥約會。

- If you don't want to date me, that's fine, I get that.

- 如果你不想和我約會，沒關係，我明白。

But you're wrong and I hate you.

但你錯了，我恨你。

- Let her date the underwear models

- 讓她和內衣模特約會吧

and the pro surfers, okay.

和職業衝浪者，還好。

I'm sorry if we're real people.

如果我們是真人，我很抱歉。

- We're real. - So real.

- 我們是真實的。- 如此真實。

- We're the realest people. - I know.

- 我們是最真實的人。- 我知道，我知道

- I'm sick of beautiful people

- 我厭倦了美麗的人

who don't have to work for their beauty

巧婦難為無米之炊

when I'm over here sweating my balls off

當我在這裡出汗我的球了。

for all this beauty.

對於這一切的美麗。

And you can hardly tell some days.

有些時候，你幾乎無法分辨。

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

(Adam grunting) (woman gasping)

(亞當叫聲) (女人喘氣)

- Dang it.

- 該死的。

- I'm so sorry.

- 我很抱歉

- Hey. - Hey.

- 嘿 嘿

- You dropped this.

- 你掉了這個。

Did you...

你有沒有...

(both giggling)

（兩個傻笑）

Oh, wow.

哦，哇。

Really got something there.

真的有東西在那裡。

- You really got something there with that body, girl.

- 你的身材真的很不錯，女孩。

(woman laughing) (Adam laughing)

（女人笑）（亞當笑）。

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Your Honor,

- 閣下

I do declare that we have a star witness

我宣佈，我們有一個明星證人

that we would like to call to the stand.

我們想請他上臺發言。

- To the what?

- 為了什麼？

- To the stand.

- 去看臺。

- I don't understand a word you're saying.

- 我聽不懂你在說什麼。

- To the stand, to the stand.

- 為了立場，為了立場。

- And we all were just screaming "Montez, stop,"

- 我們都在喊 "Montez, 停下來"

and he just continued to squeeze the life

他只是繼續擠壓生活

out of the poor little girl scout's dalmatian.

出可憐的小女孩童子軍的大麥町。

It was disgusting.

真讓人噁心。

- What?

- 什麼？

- Could we get back to the case?

- 我們能回到案子上嗎？

- Your Honor,

- 閣下

we are just here to tell the truth, the whole truth,

我們只是在這裡說實話， 整個真相。

and nothing but the truth about a vile and disgusting man

只不過是一個卑鄙噁心的人的真相而已。

who is trying to ruin our party.

誰是試圖破壞我們的黨。

- Could you use your regular voice, please?

- 你能用你的正常聲音嗎？

- This young lady knows where I'm coming from.

- 這位小姐知道我的來歷。

Don't you, doll?

你不覺得嗎，娃娃？

- Huh?

- 咦？

- Do you like pool parties, miss?

- 你喜歡泳池派對嗎，小姐？

- Yeah.

- 是啊。

- And are you available this Saturday,

- 而你這週六有空嗎。

and may I remind you, you are under oath.

我想提醒你，你是發過誓的。

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Whoa.

- 哇。

Just the boo I was looking for.

正好是我要找的噓。

- Where you going?

- 你要去哪裡？

- Just a little hug-a-roo for ya.

- 只是一個小小的擁抱，一個roo為雅。

- I'm sorry, do I know you?

- 對不起，我認識你嗎？

- (laughing) No, we know each other.

- (笑)不，我們認識。

Last year, in the stairwell, we,

去年，在樓梯間，我們。

underneath the shirt, over the bra maneuv from the backside.

襯衣下面，從後面套在胸罩上。

I like, I'll say that.

我喜歡，我會說。

- I was drunker than I thought.

- 我比我想象的還要醉。

- Yeah, most def.

- 是的，大部分都是。

So, what has been popping off in your world?

那麼，在你的世界裡，都有哪些爆款呢？

I'm super interested.

我超級感興趣。

- Look, I don't want to be rude, okay,

- 聽著，我不想無禮，好嗎？

but last year was a gigantic mistake.

但去年是一個巨大的錯誤。

- Oh yeah, most def, for sure.

- 哦，是的，最def，肯定。

- You're like a five. - Yeah.

- 你就像一個五。- 是啊，你是五分。

- And I'm looking for more of like a nine or a 10.

- 我在尋找更多的像9或10。

- Oh yeah, nine, 10, for sure, yeah, most def.

- 哦，是的，9，10，肯定的，是的，大多數的赤字。

- Tall, rich, handsome, can quote funny movies.

- 高、富、帥，會引用搞笑電影。

- Funny movies?

- 有趣的電影？

"Yeah, baby, yeah."

"是啊，寶貝，是啊。"

"It's nice."

"這很好。"

♪ Got to be fresh ♪

必須是新鮮的

- Oh, hello.

- 哦，你好。

Look what we have here.

看看我們這裡有什麼。

- Whoa, what the hell.

- 哇，什麼是地獄。

- Mm, jealousy does not look good on you.

- 嗯，嫉妒對你的影響不大。

- Who are you?

- 你是誰？

- Do this maneuv ring any bells?

- 這個動作有印象嗎？

Stairwell?

樓梯間？

Oh wait, there's no bra here, and I like that much better.

哦，等等，這裡沒有胸罩，我更喜歡這樣。

- This is so weird.

- 這真是太奇怪了。

- My tits are telling me to sleep with you.