I'M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT.

我是你的主播，史蒂芬-科爾伯特。

LET'S DRIVE THAT TRAIN!

讓我們來駕駛那輛火車！

BECAUSE WE HAVE A VERY SPECIAL, VERY RARE FRIDAY "A LATE SHOW"

因為我們有一個非常特殊的，非常罕見的週五 "晚間秀"。

TONIGHT, BECAUSE TONIGHT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,THE BIG NEWS

今晚，因為今晚，女士們，先生們，重大新聞。

CONTINUES TO BE THAT JOE BIDEN IS THE PRESIDENT OF THESE UNITED

繼續認為喬伊-比登是這些聯合王國的主席。

STATES.

國家：

AND, YES, THAT HAS BEEN TRUE FOR NINE DAYS AT THIS POINT, BUT I

而且，是的，這已經是真實的九天在這一點上，但我。

STILL NEED REMINDERS.

還需要提醒。

EVERY DAY, I THROW OPEN MY WINDOW AND SAY TO A PASSING

每天，我都會打開窗戶，對過往的人說

STREET URCHIN BELOW, "BOY!

街頭巷尾，"BOY!

YOU, BOY!

你，小子！

WHAT ADMINISTRATION IS IT?" AND THE KID SAYS "TODAY?

什麼管理是它？"和孩子說："今天？"。

IT'S THE BIDEN ADMINISTRATION, SIR!"

是比登政府，先生！"

THEN I FLIP HIM A FARTHING TO GO BUY ME A GOOSE, AND HE ASKS ME

然後我給他發了個屁，讓他去給我買只鵝，他問我

TO VENMO HIM INSTEAD, AND FROM THERE, IT'S MOSTLY JUST ME

而不是去找他，從那裡開始，就只剩下我一個人了。

CALLING MY KIDS TO ASK HOW YOU DO THAT.

打電話給我的孩子，問你怎麼做的。

NO MATTER HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT JOE BIDEN AND KAMALA HARRIS

不管你對喬-比登和卡瑪拉-哈里斯的看法是什麼

POLITICALLY, IT'S REFRESHING TO HAVE A NEW ADMINISTRATION TAKING

在政治上，有一個新的行政當局採取的措施是令人欣慰的。

THE REINS.

萊恩斯。

IT'S LIKE YOUR FAVORITE RESTAURANT IS FINALLY SERVING

好像你最喜歡的餐廳終於開始提供服務了。

A NEW DISH, WHICH IS NICE, BECAUSE THE DAILY SPECIAL FOR

一個新的DISH，這是很好的，因為每天的特殊性的

THE LAST FOUR YEARS WAS FILET OF BROKEN GLASS WITH A SHALLOT AND

過去的四年是一排碎玻璃，還有一發炮彈和一發子彈

BLEACH REMOULADE.

BLEACH REMOULADE。

AND BECAUSE THIS IS SUCH AN HISTORIC CHANGING OF THE GUARDS,

因為這是一個歷史性的衛隊變化。

WE ARE DEDICATING TONIGHT'S ENTIRE SHOW TO JOSEPH R. BARDEN

我們將把今晚的整場演出獻給JOSEPH R. BARDEN。

AND KAMALA HARRIS, IN WHAT WE'RE CALLING "THE LATE SHOW'S CHECK

還有卡馬拉-哈里斯，我們稱之為 "晚間秀的檢查"。

YOUR MALARKEY AT THE DOOR, JOE TIME LIKE THE PRESENT, KAMALA-N

你的馬勒基在門口，喬時間像現在這樣，卡馬拉-N。

FEEL THE NOISE, SORRY, NEW COUNTRY, WHO DIS?

感受噪音，對不起，新國度，誰在？

PREZ-TRAVAGANZA!" JOE AND KAMALA-- OR AS NO ONE

PREZ -TRAVANZA！"喬和KAMALA -- 或者說是沒有人

CALLS THEM, JOE-MALA-- HAVE BEEN IN OFFICE FOR LESS THAN TWO

呼叫他們，喬 -馬拉 -- 已經在辦公室不到兩個。

WEEKS, AND THEIR ADMINISTRATION HAS ALREADY BEEN HISTORIC.

幾個星期，他們的管理已經是歷史性的了。

KAMALA IS THE FIRST FEMALE VICE PRESIDENT, THE FIRST BLACK VICE

卡馬拉是第一位女性副主席，第一位黑人副主席。

PRESIDENT, AND THE FIRST SOUTH ASIAN VICE PRESIDENT, WHEREAS

主席和第一任南亞副主席，鑑於

JOE IS ONLY THE SECOND CATHOLIC PRESIDENT IN THE HISTORY OF THE

喬伊是美國曆史上第二位教廷主席。

UNITED STATES.

美國：

WHICH MEANS I CAN USE MY SECRET TELEPATHIC POWERS TO CONTACT

這意味著我可以使用我的祕密心靈感應能力來聯繫你。

HIM.

他：

HOLD ON.

堅持住。

SUNDAY SERVICE AT 10:30 AT OUR LADY OF GOOD HOPE.

週日10:30在我們的聖母瑪利亞教堂舉行禮拜。

THAT'S IT.

這就是它。

WE CAN ONLY COMMUTE MASS TIMES.

我們只能通勤大規模的時間。

IT'S NOT VERY USEFUL.

它不是很有用。

BIDEN IS FAMOUS FOR WORKING WITH EVERYONE IN CONGRESS.

比登因與國會中的所有人合作而聞名。

IN THE PAST DECADES NO ONE HAS BEEN MORE EFFICIENT THAN BIDEN

在過去的幾十年裡，沒有人比比登更有效。

MAKING DEALS ACROSS THE AISLE.

跨越過道進行交易。

THAT'S RIGHT, JACK, I WORKED WITH DEMOCRATS, REPUBLICANS,

沒錯，傑克，我和民主黨、共和黨都合作過。

SOCIALISTS, LIBERTARIANS, KNOW-KNOGS, WHIGS I RAN ON A

社會主義者，自由主義者，知識分子，白鬼，我在一個人身上運行

UNITY TICKET WITH GAIL GAM EVERYBODY.

團結票與GAIL GAM每個人。

WE HAD THE FIRST BUMPER STICKER.

我們有第一個BUMPER STICKER。

AGAIN, HE IS CROWNED WITH MANY WINTERS, BUT JOE DIDN'T COME TO

再一次，他是冠以許多冬天，但喬沒有來過。

THE WHITE HOUSE ALONE.

獨自一人的白宮。

HE'S ALSO BROUGHT HIS TWO GERMAN SHEPHERDS-- MAJOR BIDEN, SEEN

HERE WONDERING IF YOU'RE GOING TO FINISH THAT NAPKIN, AND CHAMP

這裡想知道你是否會完成那張餐巾紙，和CHAMP。

BIDEN, SEEN HERE REGRETTING LISTING HIS BED ON AIRBNB.

比登，在這裡看到後悔上市 他的床在AIRBNB。

BIDEN IS NO POLITICAL NOVICE.

比登不是政治小說。

THIS WAS HIS THIRD RUN FOR PRESIDENT, THE FIRST BEING ALL

這是他第三次競選總統，第一次是在所有的。

THE WAY BACK IN 1988.

1988年的時候

BUT YOU KNOW THE OLD EXPRESSION: "IF AT FIRST YOU DON'T SUCCEED,

但你知道那句老話："如果一開始你沒有成功，那你就會失敗。

WAIT 20 YEARS, TRY AGAIN, FAIL AGAIN, END UP VICE PRESIDENT,

等20年，再試一次，再失敗一次，最後成為副總統。

DECIDE NOT TO RUN, LEAVE OFFICE, WAIT FOUR AGONIZING YEARS AS THE

決定不參選，離任，等待四個漫長的年頭。

COUNTRY DESCENDS INTO CHAOS, AND TRY, TRY AGAIN."

國家陷入混亂，並嘗試，再嘗試。"

AND JOE HAS ALSO HAD TO BATTLE A DESCRUS MISCONCEPTION ABOUT HIM.

而喬也不得不與對他的描述性誤解作鬥爭。

>> WHAT'S THE BIGGEST MISCONCEPTION ABOUT YOU, SIR?

>> 先生，對你最大的誤解是什麼？

>> I HAVE MORE HAIR THAN THEY THOUGHT I DO.

>> 我的頭髮比他們認為的還要多。

>> HEAR THAT RUSKIES.

>> 聽到了嗎，Ruskies。

GOING INTO ARMS NEGOTIATIONS WITH TOE TO TOE WITH THIS HIM,

與他腳趾頭進行談判。

THINKING THIS GUY HAS WAY MORE HAIR.

認為這傢伙有更多的頭髮。

YOU BETTER CHECK YOURSELF BECAUSE JOE HAS A PERFECTLY

你最好檢查一下你自己，因為喬伊有一個完美的。

ACCURATE COUNT OF HIS OWN HAIRS.

準確地計算他自己的頭髮。

ONE OF THE PINNACLES OF JOE'S CAREER WAS WHEN HE WAS AWARDED

喬伊職業生涯的巔峰之一是他獲得了 "中國最佳男演員 "的稱號。

THE NATION'S HIGHEST HONOR, THE MEDAL OF FREEDOM.

國家最高榮譽，自由勳章。

HE WAS PRESENTED TO HIM BY HIS BEST FRIEND BECAUSE GUY YOU

他是由他最好的朋友介紹給他的，因為你這個傢伙

DON'T KNOW HE KNOWS BECAUSE HE DOESN'T LIKE TO TALK ABOUT HIM.

不知道他知道，因為他不喜歡談論他。

BARACK OBAMA.

巴拉克・奧巴馬。

>> AND OF COURSE, WE CAN'T TALK ABOUT THE NEW ADMINISTRATION

>> 當然，我們不能談論新政府的問題

WITHOUT TALKING ABOUT VICE PRESIDENT KAMALA HARRIS.

而不談卡馬拉-哈里斯副主席，

SHE'S ALWAYS BEEN A FIGHTER.

她一直是一個戰士。

WHEN SHE RAN FOR SAN FRANCISCO DISTRICT ATTORNEY IN 2003, SHE

她在2003年擔任舊金山地區檢察官時，她

RAN AGAINST TERENCE HALLINAN, HER FORMER BOSS.

和她的前老闆泰倫斯-哈林南對著幹。

AND HER MESSAGE WAS, "WE'RE PROGRESSIVE, LIKE TERENCE

她的留言是："我們是進步的，就像TERENCE一樣。

HALLINAN, BUT WE'RE COMPETENT, LIKE TERENCE HALLINAN IS NOT.

哈里南，但我們是有能力的，就像泰倫斯-哈里南不是。

AN EMPRISEF SLOGAN, ALTHOUGH IT UNDERCUT YOUR PROGRESSIVE

一個EMPRISEF SLOGAN，儘管它削弱了你的進步。

MESSAGE WHEN YOU HAVE TO BUY A A PRIUS TO FIT THE BUMPER STICKER.

當你需要買一個PRIUS來裝上保險槓時的資訊。

AFTER A GRUELING CAMPAIGN THEY MADE IT TO THE WHITE HOUSE.

在經歷了一場殘酷的競選後，他們進入了白宮。

BUT PERHAPS WHAT JOE BIDEN AND KAMALA HARRIS WILL BE MOST

但也許喬-比登和卡馬拉-哈里斯最喜歡的是什麼？

REMEMBERED FOR IS APPEARING ON MY SHOW, AN HONOR USUALLY

被記住的是出現在我的節目中，通常是一種榮譽

RESERVED FOR ACTORS PROMOTING THEIR LATEST NETFLIX SERIES OR

為宣傳自己最新的網絡電視連續劇或電影的演員保留。

PARTICULARLY HANDSOME HORSES.

特別是漂亮的馬。

BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM, JOE AND KAMALA HAVE BEEN ON THE SHOW 11

喬和卡瑪拉兩人已經上了11期節目。

TIMES.

時代。

AND TONIGHT, WE'RE GOING TO CELEBRATE SOME OF THEIR BEST

而今晚，我們要去慶祝一些他們最好的。

MOMENTS, INCLUDING SOME STUFF THAT HAS NEVER AIRED ON

瞬間，包括一些從未播出過的節目。

BROADCAST TELEVISION.

廣播電視：

AND I WANT TO START WITH ONE OF MY FAVORITE APPEARANCES FROM

我想先從我最喜歡的一次亮相開始。

THEN-VICE PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN, JUST A FEW WEEKS AFTER THE 2016

時任副總統喬伊-比登，在2016年後的幾周內。

ELECTION.

選舉：

AMERICA WAS GOING THROUGH THIS DIFFICULT CHANGES AND AWKWARD

美國正經歷著這種艱難的變化和尷尬的。

GROWING PAINS.

成長的痛苦。

SO JOE BIDEN AGREED TO JOIN ME WHEN I CALLED A NATIONAL FAMILY

所以喬-比登同意和我一起召開全國家庭會議

MEETING.

會議：

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( GRUNTS )

（歡呼聲和掌聲） （叫聲）

HEY, BUDDY.

嘿，哥們。

HEY, BUDDY.

嘿，哥們。

TAKE A LOAD OFF.

拿一個負載關閉。

LISTEN.

聽。

I WAS HOPING WE COULD HAVE A LITTLE RAP SESSION HERE, YOU

我希望我們可以有一個小的RAP SESSION在這裡，你。

KNOW, CONNECT, JUST SORT SOME STUFF OUT LIKE YOU'VE GOT TO DO

瞭解，連接，只是把一些東西整理出來，就像你必須做的一樣。

EVERY SO OFTEN.

每隔一段時間。

BUT, YOU KNOW, I'M REALLY JUST A FATHER FIGURE.

但是，你知道，我真的只是一個父親的形象。

I DON'T HAVE ANY REAL POWER AROUND HERE.

我在這裡沒有任何真正的權力。

THAT'S WHY I'VE ALSO INVITED A FATHER FIGURE WHO HAS ACTUAL

這就是為什麼我還邀請了一個有實際經驗的父親的原因

AUTHORITY: YOUR POPS, JOE.

你的持久性有機汙染物，喬。

COME ON HERE.

來這裡。

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) GOOD TO SEE YOU, POPS.

（歡呼聲和掌聲）很高興見到你，POPS。

IT'S SO IMPORTANT YOU DO THIS EVERY SO OFTEN.

你每隔一段時間就做一次這樣的事是非常重要的。

IT'S SO IMPORTANT TO HAVE THESE MEETINGS.

召開這些會議非常重要。

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> I KNOW.

（歡呼聲和掌聲） >> 我知道。

THEY DON'T LISTEN ALL THE TIME, THOUGH.

他們不聽所有的時間，但。

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: YEAH, YEAH.

( 歡呼聲和掌聲 ) >> 史蒂芬: 是的, 是的.

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) EXACTLY.

（歡呼聲和掌聲）正是如此。

SO, LISTEN.

所以，聽。

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ALL RIGHT, SIT DOWN, FELLA.

（歡呼聲和掌聲）所有的權利，坐下來，費拉。

SIT DOWN.

坐下來。

WE HAVE TO TALK.

我們必須談談。

YOU CAN'T CLAP YOUR WAY OUT OF THIS MEETING.

你不能拍拍你的方式離開這個會議。

WE HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THIS.

我們得談談這個。

( LAUGHTER ) >> HEY, CHAMP.

（笑） >> 嘿，CHAMP。

HOW YOU DOING?

你怎麼做？

>> Stephen: POPS AND I ARE WORRIED ABOUT THE SUDDEN

>> Stephen: POPS和我都很擔心這個問題。

CHANGES.

變化。

WE KNOW YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT THE CHANGES THE FAMILY IS GOING

我們知道你很擔心我們家的變化

THROUGH.

通過：

>> HAPPENS TO EVERY FAMILY.

>> 每個家庭都會發生。

BUT I'M TELLING YOU, THIS TERRIBLE FEELING YOU'RE HAVING

但我告訴你，這種可怕的感覺，你正在有

RIGHT NOW?

現在？

IT'S NOT PERMANENT.

它不是永久性的。

IT WILL BE OVER IN FOUR YEARS MAYBE EIGHT.

四年後就會結束，也許是八年。

( LAUGHTER ) BUT YOU KNOW THERE'S AN OLD

（笑）但你知道有一個古老的

SAYING IN THIS FAMILY: LIFE IS LIKE A GRANDFATHER CLOCK.

在這個家庭中說：生活就像一個祖父的時鐘。

>> Stephen: EXACTLY, LIFE IS LIKE A GRANDFATHER CLOCK-- MAYBE

>> 史蒂芬：正是如此，生活就像一個祖父的鐘--也許吧。

THE PENDULUM HAS SWUNG TO ONE SIDE, BUT IT WILL SWING BACK TO

擺錘已經擺到了一邊，但還會擺回來的。

THE OTHER.

其他：

>> POINT IS, YOU SHOULD PROBABLY GET A NEWER CLOCK.

>> 重點是，你可能會得到一個更新的時鐘。

OR, BETTER YET, JUST LOOK AT YOUR PHONE.

或者，更好的是，只是看看你的手機。

( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: TIME IS RIGHT ON

( 笑 ) >> 史蒂芬: 時間到了。

THERE.

在那裡。

HEY, BUDDY, WE'RE NOT DONE.

嘿，夥計，我們還沒有完成。

SIT DOWN.

坐下來。

OKAY, WE'RE JUST GETTING STARTED.

好吧，我們剛剛開始。

DO YOU NEED SOME BUG SPRAY FOR THE ANTS IN YOUR PANTS.

你需要一些蟲子噴霧劑來對付你褲子裡的螞蟻嗎？

( LAUGHTER ) THAT'S A DAD JOKE.

（笑）這是一個爸爸的笑話。

GET USED TO IT.

習慣了。

LOOK, ALL RIGHT.

看，所有的權利。

THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE WE NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.

還有一些事情我們需要和你談談。

>> LOOK, WE'RE NOT MAD.

>> 看，我們沒有生氣。

WE'RE JUST DISAPPOINTED.

我們只是感到失望。

>> Stephen: I'M ACTUALLY MAD.

>> 史蒂芬：我真的瘋了。

I'M ACTUALLY VERY MAD.

我真的很生氣。

LOOK, WE OVERHEARD YOU USING SOME PRETTY SALTY LANGUAGE THE

聽著，我們無意中聽到你說了一些很鹹的語言，你知道嗎？

OTHER DAY.

其他日子。

>> WE KNOW YOU'RE BETTER THAN THAT.

>> 我們知道你比這更好。

WE DON'T WANT TO HEAR THOSE SWEAR WORDS FROM YOU-- "HOGWASH"

我們不想聽到你說的那些髒話... "HOGWASH"。

OR "BALONEY" OR "MALARKEY."

或 "BALONEY "或 "MALARKEY"。

>> Stephen: JOE, JOE, WE'RE ON CBS.

>> 喬伊，喬伊，我們在CBS。

THEY'RE GOING TO BLEEP HALF OF THAT.

他們會把一半的錢都吃了。

( LAUGHTER ) >> I'M SORRY.

（笑） >> 對不起。

I'M SO GOSH DARN DISAPPOINTED-- ( LAUGHTER )

我是如此GOSH DARN失望 - （笑）。

>> Stephen: THAT IS THE ANGRIEST I HAVE EVER SEEN THIS MAN!

>> 史蒂芬：這是我見過的最憤怒的人！。

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ARE YOU HAPPY?

（歡呼聲和掌聲） 你快樂嗎？

LOOK WHAT YOU DID?

看看你做了什麼？

>> SORRY, I'M SORRY.

>> 對不起，我很抱歉。

>> Stephen: LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO YOUR POP!

>> 看看你對你的POP做了什麼！

YOU MADE HIM SAY THE "D" WORD.

你讓他說 "D "字。

ARE YOU GOING TO BE OKAY?

你沒事吧？

>> I THINK SO.

>> 我想也是。

>> Stephen: LOOK, I DON'T MEAN TO COME DOWN TOO HARD ON YOU,

>> 聽著，我並不想對你太苛刻。

BUDDY, I JUST DON'T THINK IT'S THE JOB OF YOUR CAD TO BE A BEST

夥計，我不認為你的CAD的工作是成為一個最好的。

FRIEND.

朋友。

>> WELL, I DO, I DO.

>> 好吧，我做，我做。

LOOK, HERE ARE SOME LEFTOVER FIREWORKS.

看，這裡有一些左轉火工場。

I WANT YOU TO TAKE THEM, I WANT YOU TO GO OUT, AND I WANT YOU TO

我想讓你帶著它們，我想讓你出去，我想讓你...

GO OUT AND HAVE SOME FUN, HAVE SOME FUN.

出去玩玩吧，玩玩吧。

YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T-- YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW, KIDDO, DON'T

你知道，你知道，你不知道 -- 你知道，你知道，孩子，不知道

THINK I HAVEN'T NOTICED YOU'VE BEEN CUTTING SOME CORNERS WHEN

我想我沒有注意到你已經切了一些玉米棒子，當。

YOU'VE BEEN MOWING THE LAWN LATELY.

你最近一直在修剪草坪。

>> Stephen: YEAH, YEAH.

>> 史蒂芬：YEAH，YEAH。

THAT'S A THING IN THIS FAMILY, THERE'S A SAYING IN THIS FAMILY,

這是一個東西在這個家庭， 有一個說法在這個家庭。

OKAY: LIFE IS LIKE A GRANDFATHER

好吧，生活就像祖父一樣。

CLOCK-- >> NO, NO, WE ALREADY DID THAT.

時鐘 -- >> 不，不，我們已經做了。

WE ALREADY DID THAT.

我們已經做了。

( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: WELL, THEN, WHAT'S

（笑） >> 斯蒂芬：好吧，那麼，什麼是。

THE SAYING, POPS?

說話，POPS？

>> THE SAYING IS, "ANY JOB WORTH DOING IS WORTH DOING WELL."

>> 俗話說："任何值得做的工作都值得做好。"

>> Stephen: OKAY, YOU HAVE TO ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST TO MOW THE

>> 好吧，你必須總是盡你最大的努力去修剪。

LAWN.

羅恩：

IT DOESN'T MATTER THAT SOMEBODY ELSE IS ABOUT TO GET THE JOB OF

別人來接這個工作並不重要。

MOWING THE LAWN AFTER YOU, EVEN THOUGH AS FAR AS YOU CAN TELL,

修剪你之後的草坪，即使你可以告訴。

THAT PERSON HAS NEVER TOUCHED A LAWNMOWER IN HIS LIFE.

那人一輩子都沒碰過割草機。

( LAUGHTER ) ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

（笑） （歡呼聲和掌聲）。

>> LOOK, LOOK, LOOK, KID, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO IS MOWING IT.

>> 看，看，看，看，孩子，這並不重要 誰在修剪它。

THE POINT IS, IT'S THE GREATEST LAWN IN THE WORLD.

重點是，這是世界上最好的草坪。

AND NO MATTER OUR DIFFERENCES, WE'RE ALL RESPONSIBLE FOR ITS

不管我們有什麼不同，我們都要對它負責。

UPKEEP.

更新：

AND I'VE GOT TO BELIEVE THAT IN THEIR HEART, THE NEXT MOWER IS--

我必須相信，在他們心裡，下一臺割草機是... ...

IS GOING TO DO THE BEST THEY CAN TO MAKE SURE THAT LAWN, THAT

將盡其所能，以確保該草坪，該。

EVERYONE FEELS SAFE TO HAVE A PICNIC ON IT.

每個人都覺得安全，有一個在它的野餐。

( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: THAT'S A BEAUTIFUL

（笑） >> 斯蒂芬：這是一個美麗的。

METAPHOR.

METAPHOR.

( LAUGHTER ) >> METAPHOR?

( 笑 ) >> 隱喻?

METAPHOR, OKAY.

譬喻，好的。

LOOK, I'M TALKING ABOUT MOWING THE LAWN.

聽著，我在說修剪草坪的事。

( LAUGHTER ) WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

你在說什麼？

>> Stephen: SAME THING.

>> 史蒂芬：一樣的。

I'M TALKING ABOUT THE SAME THING.

我說的是同樣的事情。

LISTEN, BUDDY, JUST REMEMBER, WHEN YOU'RE DOING A JOB, ALWAYS

聽著，夥計，記住，當你在做一件事的時候，一定要記住。

GIVE 110% AND ALWAYS RESPECT YOUR BOSS.

奉獻110%，永遠尊重你的老闆。

>> ESPECIALLY IF HE HAS THE NUCLEAR LAUNCH CODES.

>> 特別是如果他有核彈發射密碼。

( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: GOOD POINT.

( 笑 ) >> 斯蒂芬: 好的觀點。

LISTEN TO THIS MAN.

聽聽這個人。

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

你知道嗎？

YOU KNOW WHAT?

你知道嗎？

HERE'S-- HERE'S 20 BUCKS.

這裡有 -- 這裡有20塊錢。

GO HAVE SOME FUN.

去找點樂子吧。

>> HEY, YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW WHAT-- I NEED TO BORROW THAT 20

>> 嘿，你知道，你知道什麼 - 我需要借那20個

BUCKS.

BUCKS。

( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

（笑聲） （掌聲）

YOU KNOW-- I'M-- I'M LOSING MY JOB PRETTY SOON.

你知道... ... 我... ... 我馬上就要失業了。

I'M LOSING MY JOB PRETTY SOON.

我很快就會失去工作了

>> Stephen: OH, YOU'RE LOSING YOUR JOB.

>> 哦，你要失業了。

OH, YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.

哦，是的，這是正確的。

( LAUGHTER ) SO WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO

那你打算怎麼做？

NEXT, POPS?

接下來，POPS？

>> WELL, I'M GOING TO FOLLOW MY PASSION, YOU KNOW, SPEEDBOAT

>> 好吧，我要去追隨我的激情，你知道的，飛艇

RACING.

賽事：

( LAUGHTER ) I LOVE DANGER, YOU KNOW.

（笑）我愛危險，你知道的。

AND YOU GOT YOUR WHOLE LIFE AHEAD OF YOU, KID.

而你有你的整個生活在你面前，孩子。

>> Stephen: YEAH, YOU'VE GOT YOUR WHOLE LIFE AHEAD OF YOU.

>> 是的，你的一生都在前面。

DON'T LISTEN TO HIM.

不要聽他的。

SPEAKING OF LIFE, I THINK IT'S MAYBE TIME WE HAD "THE TALK."

說到生活，我想是時候我們來 "談談 "了。

DON'T BE EMBARRASSED!

不要害羞!

UP HERE.

上來這裡。

DON'T BE EMBARRASSED.

不要羞於啟齒。

PERFECTLY NATURAL.

完美的自然。