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  • (keys clacking)

    (鑰匙嗒嗒聲)

  • - Can your vagina be too wet?

    - 陰道會不會太溼?

  • 100%. And here's how.

    100%.而這裡的方法。

  • A wet vagina is not unhealthy,

    陰道溼潤並非不健康。

  • as WAP experts correctly claim,

    正如WAP專家正確的說法。

  • cooking moisture is completely normal.

    烹調水分是完全正常的。

  • and the result of sexual excitement.

    和性興奮的結果。

  • Blood flow increases to the vajayjay,

    血流增加到金剛座。

  • causing the beef and the bean to swell

    導致牛肉和豆子腫脹。

  • and the walls of the lady garden to lubricate themselves

    和淑女園的牆壁來潤滑自己。

  • to make porking more pleasurable.

    使得吃豬肉更有樂趣。

  • But even if your hoo-ha is perfectly healthy,

    但即使你的呼呼是完全健康的。

  • can it still be too wet?

    還會不會太溼?

  • 100%. Let's say you just moved into a very cool mansion.

    100%.比方說,你剛搬進一個非常酷的豪宅。

  • The rooms are funky, Kylie Jenner is there,

    房間很時髦,凱莉-詹娜在那裡。

  • and so are some jungle cats.

    一些叢林貓也是如此。

  • It's a sex positive house.

    這是一個性積極的房子。

  • So they encourage you to finger paint whenever you like.

    所以他們鼓勵你隨時用手指畫畫。

  • Nice.

    很好啊

  • Only problem is the more you dial your rotary phone,

    唯一的問題是,你的旋轉電話越撥越多。

  • the more your vagina releases a perfectly normal, strong,

    你的陰道越是釋放出一種完全正常的、強烈的。

  • earthy odor and big cats are attracted to smells,

    土腥味,大貓對氣味很有吸引力。

  • particularly earthy ones.

    尤其是土豪的。

  • It reminds them of the jungle. 100% confirmed.

    這讓他們想起了叢林。100%確認。

  • Now that your minja musk is in the air,

    現在你的民子麝香已經在空氣中了。

  • the leopards and tigers won't stop roaring,

    豹子和老虎不會停止咆哮。

  • rubbing up against your door,

    蹭到你的門上。

  • peeing on it to mark the territory.

    在上面撒尿,以標記領土。

  • The residents call an emergency house meeting.

    居民們召開緊急家庭會議。

  • They love having you there, but you have to leave.

    他們喜歡你在那裡,但你必須離開。

  • You're making the big cats crazy

    你把大貓弄瘋了

  • because your vulvarine is too moist.

    因為你的外陰部太潮溼了。

  • Let's say you're not at a mansion with your gal pals.

    比方說,你不在豪宅和你的女伴們在一起。

  • You're on a winter family vacation

    你是在冬季家庭度假

  • skating on a frozen lake

    在冰湖上滑冰

  • and you take to the ice like Tanya, doing turns

    你像譚雅一樣在冰面上輪番上陣。

  • and triple axels.

    和三軸。

  • You're turned on by your talent.

    你被你的才華所吸引。

  • Your coochie engorges,

    你的小雞雞充血了。

  • stimulating your vaginal mucus and causing warm lube

    刺激你的陰道粘液,引起溫熱的潤滑油。

  • to flow down your legs onto the cold ice,

    順著你的腿流到冰冷的冰面上。

  • ice, which when exposed to heat, cracks.

    冰,受熱後就會開裂。

  • Your hot lady juice causes fissure to crack through the rink

    你的辣妹子汁液導致裂縫穿過冰場。

  • that swallows your cousins.

    吞下你的表兄弟。

  • Your family gets hypothermia

    你的家人得到低體溫

  • because your clam got too drippy.

    因為你的蛤蜊太溼潤了。

  • Let's say you're not out with your family.

    比方說,你不和你的家人一起出去。

  • You're enjoying a pleasant dinner alone

    你正獨自享受著愉快的晚餐

  • because you're a woman in your sixties

    因為你是一個六十多歲的女人。

  • and you can do whatever you want.

    你可以做任何你想要的。

  • Girl power.

    女孩的力量。

  • Which is why you asked to have what

    這就是為什麼你要求有什麼

  • the screaming blonde lady across from you is having.

    尖叫的金髮女士從你對面有,

  • Turns out, it's an incredible sandwich.

    原來,這是一個不可思議的三明治。

  • Each bite of pastrami causes you to tilt your head back

    每一口薰牛肉都會讓你的頭向後仰。

  • in ecstasy and your loins to produce even more lady grease,

    在狂喜和你的腰部產生更多的女士油脂。

  • grease that runs down your slacks and pores over the floor

    油光滿面

  • of the deli.

    的熟食店。

  • A deli that is currently being visited by

    一家熟食店,目前正在由

  • the safety inspector,

    安全檢查員;

  • who is livid to see a greasy floor without a wet floor sign.

    誰看到油膩的地板沒有溼地板的標誌,就會很生氣。

  • This is the last straw. He closes the restaurant.

    這是最後一根稻草。 他關閉了餐廳。

  • Katz's Deli shutters it doors because your lady garage

    卡茨的熟食店關上門,因為你的女士的車庫。

  • caused a deluge.

    引起了一場大洪水。

  • Let's say you're not at a diner.

    比方說,你不在餐廳。

  • You're in a completely nonsexual setting,

    你是在一個完全無性的環境中。

  • a business meeting,

    商務會議。

  • but you had pastrami for lunch

    但你午餐吃的是薰牛肉

  • and it's still making you horny.

    它仍然使你角質。

  • And now you're sitting there,

    而現在你坐在那裡。

  • squirting in your business suit.

    穿著你的商務套裝噴灑。

  • You stand up in the hopes of rushing to the bathroom but

    你站起身來,希望能衝到衛生間去,但。

  • accidentally slip and slide all the way to the front

    誤打誤撞,滑到前面去了

  • of the room.

    的房間。

  • You should be embarrassed,

    你應該感到尷尬。

  • but you just had the best time.

    但你只是有最好的時間。

  • You tell your coworkers to give it a try and they slip

    你告訴你的同事,給它一個嘗試,他們滑倒

  • and slide down your slime trail.

    從你的泥濘小徑上滑落。

  • A light bulb goes off.

    燈泡熄滅了。

  • This is an excellent business idea.

    這是一個很好的經營理念。

  • But when the stodgy boss takes a turn,

    但當呆板的老闆轉。

  • he breaks his hip, sues you for negligence.

    他摔斷了臀部,告你疏忽。

  • Now you're drowning in medical debt,

    現在你已經被醫療債務淹沒了。

  • all because your honeypot overflowed.

    都是因為你的蜜罐溢出來了。

  • Let's say you're not in a boring office.

    比方說,你不是在一個無聊的辦公室。

  • In fact, you're in a stressful situation,

    其實,你現在的壓力很大。

  • your limbs and arms are tied down

    縛手縛腳

  • as the tiny villagers poke you with their little spears.

    當小村民們用他們的小矛戳你的時候。

  • All you remember is being on your ship

    你只記得在你的船上

  • and now you're surrounded by Lilliputians?

    現在你被小人國人包圍了?

  • As scary as it is, it's also kind of sexual.

    雖然很可怕,但也是一種性。

  • Turns out you like being bound,

    原來你喜歡被束縛。

  • but it's the 1600s.

    但它是16世紀的。

  • BDSM isn't a thing yet.

    BDSM還不是一個東西。

  • So you don't have the sexual lexicon

    所以,你沒有性詞彙。

  • to describe your arousal.

    來形容你的興奮。

  • The fluid from your legs flushes out of your pantaloons

    腿上的液體從你的褲襪裡衝出來了。

  • and drowns the pocket sized people.

    並淹沒了口袋裡的人。

  • The Lilliputians are now extinct

    小人國人已經滅絕了

  • because your cave of wonders was too waterlogged.

    因為你的奇幻洞窟太積水了。

  • So yes, your vagina can get too wet.

    所以是的,你的陰道會太溼潤。

  • It's just a matter of when and how.

    只是時間和方式的問題。

  • If you are someone with an extremely wet vagina,

    如果你是一個陰道極度溼潤的人。

  • congratulations.

    恭喜你

  • What many people don't realize is vaginal liquid

    很多人都不知道的是陰道液

  • isn't just for sexual lubrication.

    不僅僅是為了性潤滑。

  • It's also great for a variety of household tasks.

    它也是各種家務活的好幫手。

  • Got a squeaky hinge?

    有一個吱吱作響的鉸鏈?

  • Simply apply the sexual salve

    只需塗抹性藥膏

  • and enjoy that smooth motion.

    並享受這種流暢的運動。

  • So quiet.

    這麼安靜。

  • Have you come into a collection of rare coins?

    你是否遇到過收藏稀有錢幣的情況?

  • Polish it with muff mucus. So shiny.

    用馬伕粘液擦亮它。好有光澤。

  • Plagued with dry skin?

    被皮膚乾燥所困擾?

  • Your fanny slime works as a fantastic nontoxic moisturizer.

    你的腰部粘液可以作為一種神奇的無毒保溼劑。

  • So smooth.

    如此順利。

  • And don't worry about getting it on your eyes, nose,

    也不用擔心會弄到眼睛、鼻子上。

  • or mouth, loin liquid is safe to consume orally.

    或口服,腰子液口服是安全的。

  • I'm doctor expert Natasha Vaynblat,

    我是醫生專家Natasha Vaynblat。

  • and your worst fear has been confirmed.

    你最擔心的事情已經被證實了。

  • Can I die?

    我可以死嗎?

  • Can I die?

    我可以死嗎?

  • Can I die?

    我可以死嗎?

  • Can I die? Can I die?

    我可以死嗎?我可以死嗎?

  • Can I die?

    我可以死嗎?

(keys clacking)

(鑰匙嗒嗒聲)

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B2 中高級 中文 陰道 粘液 牛肉 豪宅 叢林 女士

陰道會不會太溼?- 你最擔心的事情被證實了 (Can Your Vagina Be Too Wet? - Your Worst Fears Confirmed)

  • 8 0
    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 27 日
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