Name: 柯南歡迎妮可-拜爾和 "你為什麼不和我約會？"加入他的播客網絡 (Conan Welcomes Nicole Byer & "Why Won't You Date Me?" To His Podcast Network)
Uploaded: 2021-01-13T18:11:07.000Z
Duration: 3 min 18 s

I'm now a podcast czar with a podcast empire.

我現在是一個擁有播客帝國的播客沙皇。

Anyway, I'm excited to announce the latest addition

無論如何，我很高興地宣佈最新的加入。

She is one of my all time favorite people.

她是我一直以來最喜歡的人之一。

The lovely, the talented, the sexy Nicole Byer.

可愛的，有才華的，性感的妮可拜爾。

哦，是的，是我，妮可-拜爾。這是我，妮可拜爾。

我的播客，"你為什麼不和我約會？"

And guess what? Okay, my show is about dating.

你猜怎麼著？好吧，我的節目是關於約會。

這是關於浪漫的。這是關於性的。

So I'm on a quest to answer this question

所以，我在尋找這個問題的答案。

And since you're obviously an expert in the ways of love,

I was hoping to get some dating advice from you, Conan.

我希望能從你那裡得到一些約會建議，柯南。

Well, first you do not want to be me (laughs).

好吧，首先你不要想成為我（笑）。

in a very uptight and rigid Irish Catholic home in Boston.

在波士頓一個非常緊張和僵化的愛爾蘭天主教家庭中。

That's a mistake if you want to have a sexy dating life.

如果你想有一個性感的約會生活，那是一個錯誤。

如果像我一樣，你是非常蒼白的。

think about a tanning booth before you ask a lady out.

在你約女士出來之前，先考慮一下日光浴亭。

Be a much better dresser than I was in my twenties.

比我二十多歲的時候穿衣打扮要好很多。

I wore my high school clothing all through my twenties.

我二十多歲的時候一直穿著高中的衣服。

So you've given me no dating tips for myself

所以你沒有給我任何約會的建議。

因為我已經穿得很好了，柯南。

So basically what you're saying is all I did

所以基本上你說的是我所做的一切。

was talk about my own problems instead of helping you.

是談論我自己的問題，而不是幫助你。

是的，這是另一件事，夥計們。

Don't be selfish and self-absorbed like I was just there.

不要像我剛才那樣自私自利，自作多情。

I would say my dating tip for you, Nicole,

我想說我的約會提示你，妮可。

is sometimes you put very high expectations

on what a man's genitalia should look like.

關於男人的生殖器應該是什麼樣子。

you're going to frighten some very nice guys away

who maybe don't have penises that should be

聽著，人們吃有機食品是有原因的。

So I'm just making sure what I put in my mouth is delightful

所以我只是想確保我放進嘴裡的東西是令人愉快的。

Then I have no dating tips for you (laughs).

那我就沒有約會技巧給你了（笑）。

And by the way, this is my favorite thing,

no one makes me more embarrassed than Nicole Byer

沒有人比Nicole Byer更讓我尷尬了

but I have a really good time while it's happening.

但我有一個非常好的時間，而它的發生。

for some more Nicole plus other Conan content,

為更多的妮可和其他柯南內容。

you can hear me as a guest on, "Why Won't You Date Me?"

你可以聽我做客 "你為什麼不和我約會？"

the use of the Theragun, which is supposed to be used

使用Theragun槍，該槍應該是用於：

on major muscle groups for runners after a long run.

對長跑後的跑者的主要肌肉群。

and many people in the neighborhood think

that she's having major construction done in the bedroom.

字幕列表影片播放

柯南歡迎妮可-拜爾和 "你為什麼不和我約會？"加入他的播客網絡 (Conan Welcomes Nicole Byer & "Why Won't You Date Me?" To His Podcast Network)

stuff

extremely

content

basically