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  • ♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: HEY, WELCOME BARK

    *********** 斯蒂芬嘿,歡迎巴克

  • EVERYBODY.

    每個人。

  • ONE OF THE BEST THINGS ABOUT DOING THIS SHOW IS GETTING TO

    做這個節目最棒的事情之一就是去到

  • TALK TO ALL SORTS OF FASCINATING PEOPLE.

    跟所有類型的迷人的人說話。

  • IT'S WAY MORE FUN THAN YELLING INTERVIEW QUESTIONS OUT MY

    這比在我面前大喊面試問題有趣多了

  • WINDOW AT STRANGERS.

    WINDOW AT STRANGERS.

  • BUT LATELY, I'VE FOUND MYSELF CRAVING A DEEPER CONNECTION THAN

    但最近,我發現自己渴望更深的聯繫,而不是...

  • YOU GET FROM MOST CELEBRITY INTERVIEWS, LESS "TELL ME ABOUT

    你從大多數名人訪談中得到的,是 "告訴我關於你的故事"。

  • YOUR LATEST PROJECT" AND MORE "TELL ME HOW YOUR ADULT SELF

    你的最新項目 "和更多的 "告訴我你的成人自我是什麼?

  • WOULD BE A DISAPPOINTMENT TO YOU AS A CHILD."

    會讓你作為一個孩子感到失望。"

  • BY THE WAY, DON'T GET ME STARTED.

    順便說一下,不要讓我開始。

  • WHICH IS WHY, WE HERE AT "A LATE SHOW," HAVE BEEN CAREFULLY

    這就是為什麼,我們在 "晚間秀 "這裡,一直小心翼翼地...

  • CRAFTING A SET OF QUESTIONS SPECIFICALLY DESIGNED TO DIG

    編寫一套專門設計的問題,以挖掘

  • DEEP AND REVEAL MY GUEST'S TRUEST SELF.

    深入並揭示我的客人最真實的自我。

  • QUESTIONNAIRE."

    問答器。"

  • AND IN ONLY 15 QUESTIONS, IT COVERS THE FULL SPECTRUM OF THE

    在15個問題中,它涵蓋了《聯合國憲章》的全部內容。

  • HUMAN EXPERIENCE, EVERYTHING FROM SPIRITUALITY AND THE NATURE

    人類的經驗,從精神和自然的一切。

  • OF FEAR, TO IMPORTANT STUFF LIKE SANDWICHES.

    的恐懼,對重要的東西,如三明治。

  • AND SO I WANTED TO KICK IT OFF BY ADMINISTERING THIS

    所以,我想通過管理這個來開啟它。

  • SCIENTIFICALLY-INVALID TEST TO A FEW SCIENTIFICALLY-PROVEN

    科學上無效的測試到一些科學上有效的測試。

  • CELEBRITIES.

    知名人士:

  • I MEAN, NOBODY THAT BIG: YOUR HANKS, YOUR STREEPS, YOUR

    我的意思是,沒有人那麼大:你的臀部,你的帶子,你的。

  • CLOONEYS.

    CLOONEYS:

  • FIRST UP, TOM HANKS.

    第一個上場的是TOM HANKS.

  • BUT BEFORE WE GOT TO THE QUESTIONNAIRE, I ASKED TOM TO

    但是,在我們進入問題清單之前,我問TOM

  • DISCUSS HOW HE REALLY FEELS ABOUT CELEBRITY INTERVIEWS.

    討論他對名人採訪的真實感受。

  • TOM, THANKS SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE YET AGAIN.

    TOM,非常感謝你再次來到這裡。

  • I'M SURPRISED YOUR HAIR HASN'T GROWN OUT.

    我很驚訝你的頭髮還沒長出來。

  • >> WELL, EVERY DAY IT GETS A LITTLE BETTER.

    >> 好吧,每一天它都會變得更好一點。

  • >> Stephen: I WANT TO TAKE A LITTLE SIDESTEP RIGHT HERE.

    >> 史蒂芬: 我想在這裡做一個小側步。

  • I DON'T KNOW-- ARE YOU A DICK CAVETT FAN?

    我不知道... 你是DICK CAVETT的粉絲嗎?

  • DID YOU WATCH-- >> I GREW UP WATCHING DICK

    你看了嗎 -- >> 我是看迪克長大的。

  • CAVETT.

    CAVETT.

  • YOU BET.

    你打賭。

  • >> Stephen: I LIKE TO WATCH DICK EVERY SO OFTEN.

    >> Stephen:我喜歡看迪克的每一次。

  • I'VE GOTTEN TO KNOW HIM OVER THE YEARS.

    這些年我已經認識了他。

  • I THINK HE'S A GREAT MODEL FOR INTERVIEWING AND I JUST WATCHED

    我覺得他是一個很好的採訪模式,我只是看了。

  • AN INTERVIEW HE DID WITH LEE MARVIN, AND I WANT TO ASK YOU A

    他和李-馬文做的採訪,我想問你一個問題。

  • QUESTION HE ASKED LEE MARVIN.

    他問李馬文的問題。

  • HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT INTERVIEWS?

    你對面試有什麼看法?

  • YOU'RE THE BEST AT THEM, TOM.

    你是他們中最棒的,TOM。

  • EVERYBODY-- IT'S PROVERBIAL IN LATE NIGHT THAT EVERYBODY WANTS

    每個人 -- 這是深夜的諺語,每個人都想。

  • TO SEE THE WORD "HANKS" ON THEIR BOARD.

    看到 "漢克斯 "這個詞在他們的董事會上。

  • OKAY, I DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING TONIGHT.

    好吧,我沒有做任何事情 今晚。

  • TOM HANKS WILL BE HERE.

    TOM HANKS將在這裡。

  • EVERYTHING IS UP THERE ON THE SCREEN.

    一切都在螢幕上。

  • THAT'S HOW YOU TRAINED YOURSELF.

    這就是你訓練自己的方式。

  • DOES IT EVER BOTHER YOU THAT YOU HAVE TO TALK ABOUT THE THING YOU

    你是否介意你不得不談論你的事情?

  • SPENT ALL THE TIME MAKING.

    花了所有的時間製造。

  • "JUST GO SEE THE MOVIE.

    "只要去看電影,

  • WHY DO I HAVE TO TELL EVERYBODY?"

    我為什麼要告訴大家?"

  • >> I WISH I HAD THE INTIMIDATION FACTOR LEE MARVIN HAD.

    >> 我希望我也有李-馬文那樣的煽動性因素。

  • DON'T YOU THINK DICK CAVETT WAS A LITTLE AFRAID THAT LEE MARVIN

    你不覺得迪克-卡維特有點害怕李-馬文嗎?

  • WOULD LOOSEN HIS TIE AND KICK HIS BUTT RIGHT THERE ON TV?

    會在電視上解開他的領帶,踢他的屁股嗎?

  • >> Stephen: I THINK HE WAS SMOKING CAMEL STRAIGHTS THE

    >> 史蒂芬:我想他抽的是駱駝牌香菸。

  • WHOLE TIME, TOO.

    整個時間,太。

  • ( LAUGHTER ) >> DID HE-- DID HE SIT IN THE

    (笑) >> 他 - - 他坐在這裡嗎?

  • CHAIR LIKE THIS WITH A CIGARETTE ON IT?

    像這樣的椅子,上面有菸頭?

  • YOU KNOW, I SAW HIM-- I SAW HIM ON "THE JOHNNY CARSON SHOW"

    你知道,我見過他,我在 "約翰尼-卡森秀 "上見過他。

  • MANY, MANY YEARS AGO, AND JOHNNY CARSON SAID-- NOT TO MIX UP--

    很多很多年前,約翰尼-卡森說過... 不要混淆... ...

  • I'M ON "STEPHEN COLBERT" WE'RE TALKING ABOUT DICK CAVETT AND

    我在 "史蒂芬-科伯特 "節目中,我們正在談論迪克-卡維特和... ...

  • I'M PULLING UP A JOHNNY CARSON.

    我正在拉著約翰尼・卡森。

  • >> Stephen: WHO HE WROTE FOR.

    >> Stephen:他為誰寫作:

  • >> AND THE JERRY LEWIS SHOW BRIEFLY.

    >> 和傑裡・劉易斯的節目簡單。

  • ANYWAY, LEE MARVIN SAID-- DICK CAVETT-- JIMMY FALL-- NO.

    李-馬文說... 迪克-卡韋特... 吉米-法爾...

  • JOHNNY CARSON SAID TO LEE MARVIN "YOU'RE A WAR HERO.

    約翰尼-卡森對李-馬文說:"你是個戰地英雄。

  • YOU GOT A MEDAL.

    你得到了一個獎章。

  • YOU GOT A MEDAL IN WORLD WAR II."

    你在二戰中獲得了一枚勳章"

  • HE SAID, JOHNNY, I I WAS NOT A WAR MERO.

    他說,約翰尼,我... ...我不是一個戰友。

  • I GOT SHOT IN THE ASS.

    我被射中了屁股。

  • AND I WAS SITTING THERE BLEEDING I LOOKED DOWN ON THE BEACH AND I

    我坐在那裡流著血,看著海灘上的人,我...

  • SAW A WAR HERO.

    看到一個戰爭英雄。

  • I SAW A WAR HERO.

    我看到了一個戰爭英雄。

  • I SAW A BEACH MASTER THAT WAS GUIDING AND LANDING CRAFT WITH

    我看到一個海灘大師,正在指導和降落的技巧與。

  • RED FLAGS UNDER ENEMY FIRE ON THE BEACH AT IWO JIMA.

    在巖尾島海灘上,紅旗在敵人的炮火下。

  • THAT MAN WAS A WAR HERO, AND THAT MAN WAS SERGEANT BOB

    那個人是個戰爭英雄,而那個人就是鮑勃中士。

  • QUICHEAM.

    QUICHEAM:

  • YOU KNOW WHO BOB KESHAM IS.

    你知道BOB KESHAM是誰嗎?

  • >> Stephen: CAPTAIN KANGAROO.

    >> Stephen:坎加魯上尉。

  • THE GUY WE GREW UP WITH AS CAPTAIN KANGAROO GREW UP GUIDING

    和我們一起長大的傢伙,作為姜格魯船長長大的指導。

  • IN LANDING CRAFT DURING THE INVASION OF IWO JIMA.

    在IWO JIMA入侵期間的登陸工藝。

  • >> Stephen: HOLY COW.

    >> Stephen:神聖的牛。

  • >> IF I WAS GOING TO BE ON "THE DICK CAVETT SHOW" WITH HIM, YOU

    >> 如果我要和他一起上 "迪克-卡維特秀",你就...

  • KNOW, LIKE IF WE WERE ALL ON THE SAME --

    知道,就像如果我們都在同一個 -

  • >> Stephen: SURE.

    >> Stephen: SURE.

  • >> THE QUESTION ABOUT IWO JIMA WOULD BE THE THIRD THING I WOULD

    >> 關於IWO JIMA的問題將是我想問的第三件事。

  • ASK HIM.

    問他。

  • BECAUSE I'D ACTUALLY LIKE TO KNOW FIRST WHO WAS THE VOICE OF

    因為我真的很想知道誰是那個聲音的第一人。

  • MR. MOOSE.

    穆斯先生.穆斯:

  • AND, REALLY, COULD GRANDFATHER CLOCK ACTUALLY TALK LIKE THAT?

    而且,真的,難道爺爺鍾真的會這樣說話嗎?

  • THOSE WOULD BE THE QUESTIONS I'D --

    這些都是我要問的問題...

  • >> Stephen: THE QUESTION I WOULD ASK IS, "WHEN THE TRAIN

    >> 斯蒂芬: 我想問的問題是,"當火車的時候

  • CAME AROUND PAST THE SILO FULL OF RICE KRISPIES WHY DIDN'T IT

    走過滿滿的米飯片,為什麼不呢?

  • FILL IT UP EVERY TIME."

    每次都要填滿它。"

  • THAT'S WHAT I WAS WAITING FOR EVERY DAY BEFORE GOING TO

    這就是我去之前每天都在等待的事情。

  • SCHOOL.

    學校:

  • >> WE NEEDED TO HAVE MYSTERIES.

    >> 我們需要有神祕故事。

  • OTHERWISE WE WOULD HAVE GROWN UP THINKING THERE WERE SIMPLE

    否則,我們就會認為,有簡單的成長。

  • ANSWERS TO ALL OF LIFE'S PROBLEM S.

    生活中所有問題的答案S。

  • >> Stephen: I'D LOVE TO ASK YOU A MILLION QUESTIONS, BUT I

    >> 斯蒂芬:我很想問你一百萬個問題,但我......。

  • CAN'T, SO I DISTILLED EVERYTHING POSSIBLY WORTH KNOWING ABOUT A

    我不能,所以我把所有可能知道的關於一個人的事情都蒸餾了出來。

  • PERSON DOWN TO 15 SIMPLE QUESTIONS.

    人降到15個簡單的問題。

  • TOM HANKS, ARE YOU READY FOR THE "COLBERT QUESTIONNAIRE?"

    TOM HANKS,你準備好 "科爾伯特問題清單 "了嗎?

  • >> HIT IT.

    >> HIT IT。

  • ♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: TOM HANKS, WHAT IS

    *********** 斯蒂芬TOM HANKS,什麼是

  • THE BEST SANDWICH?

    最好的三明治?

  • >> HAM-- HAM ON SWISS, NO TOMATO, LETTUCE AND MUSTARD.

    >> 火腿 -- 瑞士火腿,不加番茄,生菜和芥末。

  • >> Stephen: WHAT'S ONE THING THAT YOU OWN THAT YOU REALLY

    >> Stephen:你擁有的什麼東西是你最喜歡的?

  • SHOULD THROW OUT?

    應該扔掉嗎?

  • >> UH, UH...

    >> UH, UH...

  • >> Stephen: ONE OF THOSE TYPE WRITERS?

    >> Stephen:是那種寫手嗎?

  • BECAUSE YOU HAVE TWO.

    因為你有兩個。

  • I HAPPEN TO KNOW YOU HAVE TWO RIGHT NOW.

    我碰巧知道你現在有兩個。

  • >> HELL NO!

    >> HELL NO!

  • HELL NO!

    不!

  • YOU NEVER THROW OUT A TYPE WRITER.

    你永遠不要扔掉一個寫稿人。

  • I HAVE SOOCH STATIONARY.

    我有SOOCH STATIONARY。

  • >> Stephen: WHAT'S THE SCARIEST ANIMAL, TOM?

    >> 史蒂芬:什麼是最可怕的動物,TOM?

  • >> THAT WOULD BE A TYPE OF WORM THAT LIVES IN THE SAND OF THE

    >> 那是一種生活在沙子裡的蠕蟲

  • BEACHES OF AUSTRALIA.

    澳洲的海灘。

  • I'LL SEND YOU A PICTURE.

    我會給你發張照片。

  • IT WILL HAUNT YOUR DREAM S.

    IT WILL HAUNT YOUR DREAM S.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT HAPPENS?

    >> Stephen: 發生了什麼?

  • >> WELL, THEY'RE THESE THINGS AND THEY COME UP AND THEY HAVE

    >> 他們是這些東西,他們出現了,他們有。

  • THESE HEADS THAT IF YOU LOOK AT THEM CLOSE, THEY HONESTLY LOOK

    這些頭,如果你近距離觀察它們,它們就會誠實地看起來。

  • LIKE SOMETHING THAT THE MANDALORIN HAD TO FLEE FROM.

    就像曼達羅林不得不逃離的東西。

  • >> Stephen: APPLES OR ORANGES?

    >> Stephen:蘋果還是橘子?

  • >> I'M GOING TO GO WITH ORANGES.

    >> 我要去與橙色。

  • >> Stephen: YOU KNOW YOU CAN'T PUT PEANUT BUTTER ON AN OWNER,

    >> Stephen:你知道你不能把花生醬塗在主人身上。

  • RIGHT?

    對吧?

  • YOU CAN PUT PEANUT BUTTER ON A SLICE OF APPLE.

    你可以把花生醬放在一片蘋果上。

  • >> THAT'S NOT WHY I EAT FRUIT.

    >> 這不是我吃水果的原因。

  • I DON'T VIEW FRUIT AS A PEANUT BUTTER DELIVERY SYSTEM.

    我不把水果看成是花生醬配送系統。

  • >> Stephen: HAVE YOU EVER ASKED SOMEONE FOR THEIR

    >> Stephen:你有沒有問過別人的名字?

  • AUTOGRAPH?

    AUTOGRAPH?

  • >> YES.

    >> 是。

  • >> Stephen: WOULD YOU MIND SHARING WHO THAT IS?

    >> Stephen:你能告訴我那是誰嗎?

  • >> IT WAS-- I THOUGHT-- THE VERY FIRST TIME I EVER WENT TO A

    >> 這是 -- 我想 -- 我第一次去的時候,

  • BASEBALL GAME WHEN I WAS SEVEN YEARS OLD, I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE

    棒球比賽,當我7歲的時候,我認為這將是一個很好的機會。

  • VERY EASY JUST TO GO DOWN TO THE GIANTS' CLUBHOUSE IN CANDLESTICK

    去位於坎德利斯特克的巨人俱樂部別墅非常容易。

  • PARK, EXPLAIN TO EVERYBODY AROUND ME THAT I WANTED WILLIE

    樸,向周圍的人解釋我想要威利的原因

  • MAYS' AUTOGRAPH, AND I JUST CRAWLED OUT TO THE EDGE AND

    梅斯的自畫像,我只是爬出來的邊緣,並。

  • STUCK MY HEAD OVER THE SIDE AND WAVED A PIECE OF PAPER AND A PEN

    把頭伸到一邊,揮舞著紙和筆

  • WILLIE MAZE WOULD BE, "OF COURSE KID," DURING THE GAME.

    WILLIE MAZE會是,"當然,小子,"在遊戲中。

  • I HAD SEEN TOO MANY TV SHOWS WHERE-- AND WE WEREN'T ALLOWED

    我看過太多的電視節目,在那裡... ... 而我們不允許

  • EVEN UP CLOSE.

    即使是近距離。

  • I DIDN'T GET THE AUTOGRAPH, BUT I WANTED IT.

    我沒有得到自動圖譜,但我想要它。

  • >> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENS WHEN WE DIE?

    >> Stephen:你認為我們死後會發生什麼?

  • >> I THINK WE GET TO RACE AUTOMOBILES.

    >> 我想我們要去飆車了。

  • I THINK WE GET TO PUT ON CRASH HELMETS AND BEAT A.J. FOYT.

    我想我們要戴上防撞頭盔,打敗A. J. FOYT。

  • >> Stephen: FAVORITE ACTION MOVIE.

    >> Stephen:最喜歡的動作片:

  • >> "THE DIRTY DOZEN."

    >> "骯髒的一打"。

  • >> Stephen: THAT'S WHAT LEE MARVIN WAS TALKING TO CAVETT

    >> Stephen:這就是李-馬文對卡維特說的話

  • ABOUT, "THE DIRTY DOZEN."

    關於 "骯髒的十幾歲"。

  • I'M NOT ( BLEEP ) YOU.

    我不是(BLEEP)你。

  • THAT'S WHAT MARVIN WAS TALKING ABOUT IN THE INTERVIEW.

    這就是馬文在採訪中所說的。

  • CAVETT SAID, "YOU WERE IN WAR.

    卡維特說,"你在戰爭中。

  • HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE DEPICTION OF WAR IN MOVIES?

    你對電影中的戰爭描寫有何看法?

  • SOME PEOPLE SAY 'THE DIRTY DOZEN'."

    有人說 "骯髒的一打"。"

  • THAT GIVES YOU A SNAPSHOT INTO THE 60s.

    這給你一個60年代的快照。

  • SOME PEOPLE THOUGHT THAT GALORIFIED WAR IN A WAY THAT

    有些人認為,頌揚戰爭的方式,那是

  • REALLY SHOULDN'T BE SORT OF ADVERTISED ON THE SCREEN.

    真的不應該在螢幕上做廣告。

  • AND HE SAID, "NAH, I DON'T THINK SO"

    他說,"不,我不這麼認為"

  • HE GOES, "FILM IS REALLY ABOUT PUTTING THE TEAM TOGETHER AND

    他說:"電影就是把團隊團結在一起,然後再把它拍成電影。

  • THE TRAINING THAT WE DID, PARACHUTING INTO THE-- INTO THE

    我們所做的訓練,降落傘到...

  • CASTLE OR THE PALACE, OR WHATEVER IT WAS.

    城堡或王宮,或任何它是。