so I thought that we'd have some fun by asking you,

所以我想，我們會有一些樂趣 通過問你。

once and for all, to settle some of the biggest debates

一勞永逸地解決了一些最大的爭論。

of all time. Does that sound okay?

所有的時間。聽起來還行嗎？

-Yeah, I don't think this is fun. This is serious.

-是的，我不認為這很有趣。這是很嚴肅的。

-Yeah. That's right.

-是的。是的，沒錯

Let's do it. -And I'm prepared.

我們開始吧-我已經準備好了

-It is time for "Obama Settles It."

-現在是 "奧巴馬解決它 "的時候了。

♪ -Ohh, Obama settles it ♪

哦，奧巴馬解決它

♪ Obama settles it ♪

奧巴馬解決它

-Ow! First issue --

-哦！第一期...

-I like the little lead-in, by the way.

-對了，我喜歡這個小引子。

-Not bad, that was -- -That was pretty good.

-不錯，那是... 那是相當不錯的。

I might use that at home.

我可能會在家裡用這個。

-[ Laughs ]

-[笑]

The Roots really went for it. -At dinner.

根隊真的去了。-晚餐時

-Yeah. Alright. First issue.

-是的是啊。 - 好吧。第一個問題。

Does the person flying in the middle seat get both armrests?

坐在中間座位的人是否可以獲得兩個扶手？

-No. -Yeah.

-不 是的

-No. You know, they have to choose one.

-不，你知道，他們必須選擇一個。

-[ Laughs ]

-[笑]

If you're a righty, you -- yeah, you'd have to choose one.

如果你是右撇子，你... 是的，你必須選擇一個。

Yeah. You can't get both. -You got to choose one.

是啊，你不能兩全其美你不能兩全其美-你必須選擇一個。

You can't have both, no. -I agree. Good, settled.

你不能兩全其美 我同意好，就這麼定了

Next -- Oh, I know where you're going to go with this.

下一個... 哦，我知道你要去哪裡與此。

New York style or Chicago deep dish?

紐約風格還是芝加哥深菜？

-I'm going to go contrary to type on this.

-我打算在這個問題上與類型相反。

-What?! -I love Chicago deep-dish pizza.

-什麼？-我喜歡芝加哥的深盤披薩。

-Yes! -I love my hometown.

-我愛我的家鄉。

-Yes. -But New York style,

-是的，但是紐約的風格。

being able to fold it, walk while you're eating,

能夠一邊吃飯一邊摺疊、行走。

there's an efficiency element to it that,

有一個效率的因素，。

I think, puts it over the top.

我想，把它放在上面。

No offense, Chicago.

無意冒犯，芝加哥。

I love our pizza.

我喜歡我們的披薩。

I'm just saying. -It's settled.

我只是想說-就這麼定了

-New York's a little more practical.

-紐約更實際一點。

Chicago deep dish is basically you have to sit down.

芝加哥深菜基本上是你必須坐下來。

You eat it like lasagna, right? You can't be walking around.

你就像吃千層餅一樣，對嗎？你不能走來走去。

-It almost feels the same weight of your book.

-它幾乎感覺到你的書的重量。

One slice of Chicago deep dish.

一片芝加哥深菜。

I do love it as well.

我也確實很喜歡。

Follow-up to this question, and this is --

關於這個問題的後續行動，這是...

I think this is another no-brainer.

我覺得這又是一個不折不扣的問題。

-This is a no-- No pineapple.

-這是一個沒有 - 沒有菠蘿。

I'm from Hawaii and I know you can't have pineapple on a pizza.

我是夏威夷人，我知道披薩上不能有菠蘿。

-Thank you. Thank you. This is fantas--

-謝謝你謝謝你。 - 謝謝你。這是奇 --

-That's just wrong.

-這是不對的

-It is. Yeah.

-是的是的 - 是的

No. Good. Sorry I even asked. Alright.

不，很好對不起，我甚至問。好吧，我知道了

-I settled that. Next.

-我解決了這個問題。下一個

-This comes up every December.

-每年12月都會出現這種情況。

Is "Die Hard" a Christmas movie?

死侍》是一部聖誕電影嗎？

-No. -Yeah, I agree.

-不 是的，我同意。

-No, "It's A Wonderful Life" is a Christmas movie.

-不，"美好生活 "是一部聖誕電影。

-That's right.

-沒錯

-"Charlie Brown Christmas" is a Christmas movie.

-"查理布朗聖誕 "是一部聖誕電影。

"Die Hard" is an action flick

"《死神》是一部動作片

that happens to involve, tangentially, Christmas.

恰好涉及到，間接地，聖誕節。

-This is unbelievable.

-太不可思議了

This is the best interview I've ever done.

這是我做過的最好的採訪。

Alright. Next.

好吧，我知道了下一個

Is it okay to put ketchup on eggs?

雞蛋上放番茄醬可以嗎？

-No. -[ Laughs ]

-不 -[笑]

-Next. -[ Laughs ]

-下一個-[笑]

Got it. Should the -- -That's wrong. Next.

知道了，應該...應該是...下一個

-Should the toilet roll hang under or over?

-馬桶卷應該掛在下面還是上面？

-Over. -Yeah.

-完畢-是的

-It's got to be over. -Yep, I agree.

-一定要結束了.-是的，我同意

-Tears off easier. Neater.

-撕掉更容易。更整潔。

-The other thing is silly. It's a mistake.

-另一件事是愚蠢的。這是個錯誤

Yeah, I agree. -It's a mistake.

是的，我同意-這是個錯誤

-Is a hot dog a sandwich?

-熱狗是三明治嗎？

-No, a hot dog's a hot dog.

-不，熱狗就是熱狗。

-[ Laughs ]

-[笑]

-A sandwich is a sandwich.

-三明治就是三明治

-Even the way you said that was perfect.

-即使你說的方式是完美的。

A hot dog is a hot -- Someone's going to remix that

熱狗就是熱... 有人要把這句話改編了

into, like, a dance jam.

成，像，舞蹈果醬。

Hot dog's a hot dog.

熱狗就是熱狗

Alright. How do you pronounce the word

好的你怎麼發音這個詞

at the bottom of my screen?

在我的螢幕底部？

-Pe-cahn.

-Pe -cahn。

-Okay. Okay.

-好吧 好吧好吧，我知道了

-Oh, are you disagreeing with me on this?

-哦，你不同意我的觀點嗎？

You go with the "pee-can" thing?

你去 "尿罐 "的事情？

-Yeah, pee-can. I mean, I'm not even really --

-是的，尿罐。我的意思是，我甚至不是真的 -

I'm not -- -Pee-can.

我不是... ... "尿罐"。

-I'm not even a fan of the pecan, even though that rhymes.

-我甚至不喜歡山核桃，儘管那很押韻。

But pe-cahn sounds snooty to me.

但我覺得pe -cahn聽起來很傲慢。

Snooty nut. -[ Laughs ]

傲慢的瘋子。-[笑]

It's a little snooty? It's a little elitist?

有點勢利？有點精英主義？

-It's vas. It's face vas.

-它的VAS。它的臉是。

[ Laughter ]

[笑聲]

-Alright. -Oh, how about this one?

-好吧-哦，這個怎麼樣？

Edge pieces, brownies.

邊片，布朗尼。

The best or the worst?

最好的還是最差的？

-Best.

-最好的。

-Yeah, I agree with you, too.

-是的，我也同意你的說法。

-A little crunch. -Yep.

-一點點緊縮。-是的

-The sort of sugar crystallizes a little bit.

-那種糖會一點點結晶。

-Yep, I agree. -It's nice.

-是的，我同意-很好

-I agree. I love it, too.

-我同意。我也喜歡

Take a look at this.

看看這個。

Is the Mona Lisa smiling?

蒙娜麗莎在笑嗎？

-Slightly. -[ Laughs ]

-有一點-[笑]

-It's the Mona Lisa smile, of course.

-當然，是蒙娜麗莎的微笑。

It's a Mona Lisa smile. It's a type of smile.

這是一個蒙娜麗莎的微笑。這是一種微笑。

-She's got secrets.

-她有祕密

-It's a sly, secretive, "cat ate the canary" smile.

-這是一個狡猾的，祕密的，"貓吃了金絲雀 "的微笑。

-Uh-huh. I agree. -That's what's going on.

-嗯哼我同意。-就是這樣的.

-Yep. Next, is cereal a soup?

-是的接下來，麥片是湯嗎？

[ Laughs ]

[笑]

-[ Laughing ] What?

-什麼？

-I mean, it's like a liquid in a bowl --

-我的意思是，它就像一個碗裡的液體 --

-I mean, some of these were actual controversies.

-我的意思是，其中一些是真正的爭議。

This one, no. What does that mean?

這個，沒有。那是什麼意思？

-Sorry. I don't know how that got in there.

-抱歉，我不知道這東西怎麼會在裡面我不知道這東西怎麼會出現在那裡的

-Come on. Move on. Next. -I'm sorry.

-來吧繼續前進下一個-對不起

I don't even know how that got in there.

我都不知道這東西是怎麼進去的。

-That's terrible. -I agree.

-太可怕了-我同意

Should you tell someone

你要不要告訴別人

if there's food stuck in their teeth?

如果有食物卡在他們的牙齒？

-Yes. -Yeah.

-是的 是的

-Unless it's somebody you don't like.

-除非是你不喜歡的人。

-[ Laughs ]

-[笑]

-And then you might just kind of let 'em suffer a little bit.

-然後你就可以讓他們受點苦了

It's a small, little bit of --

這是一個小的，一點點的 -

-It's a small jab. -You know, little, small --

-這是個小刺拳 你知道，小，小...

small bit of shade that you can throw.

小小的一點陰影，你可以扔。

-Yeah, I agree. -Without big moral implications.

-是的，我同意.-沒有什麼大的道德意義.

But if you care about them, yeah, obviously.

但如果你關心他們，是的，很明顯。

-Yeah. If you made a sandwich,

-是的，如果你做了一個三明治的話。

would you cut the sandwich diagonally or horizontally?

你會把三明治斜著切還是橫著切？

You have to cut it.

你必須把它切掉。

-I was about to ask.

-我正想問

I tend not -- -[ Laughs ]

我傾向於不 -- - [笑]

-I always think, you know, the people who cut the sandwich,

-我一直在想，你知道，那些切三明治的人。

I admire them because I think, oh, you know, wow.

我佩服他們，因為我覺得，哦，你知道，哇。

You -- You -- -Wow. You went the extra step.

你，你，你，哇。你多走了一步。

-That seems like, probably,

-好像是這樣，可能是這樣

what I should do, and, yet, I never do it.

我應該做什麼，但是，我從來沒有做過。

-No, me neither.

-不，我也是

-But I guess, if I had to cut it,

-但我想，如果我必須要剪掉它的話，

maybe I'd go with the diagonal because there's something about

也許我會選擇對角線，因為有一些東西關於

the point of the -- the pointy edge of the sandwich

三明治的尖尖的地方

that you can put in your mouth a little bit...

你可以把在你的嘴一點點...

-It's an angle. It's a good bite.

-這是一個角度。這是一個好的咬合。

-...more efficiently. There's an angle.

-...更有效率。有一個角度。

-Yeah, it's like the edge of the brownie.

-是啊，就像布朗尼的邊緣。

I wish I wrote that one down.

我希望我寫下這句話。

It's like I'm talking into a mirror is what it's like.

就像我對著鏡子說話是什麼感覺。

[ Laughter ]

[笑聲]

Finally, last one. One more.

最後，最後一個。再來一個

Is the glass half empty or half full?

杯子是半空還是半滿？

-It is always half full.

-它總是半滿。

-You heard it here first.

-你先在這裡聽到的

Thank you, President Barack Obama,

謝謝你，巴拉克-奧巴馬總統。

for settling the biggest

解決最大的問題

and most important debates of all time.

和最重要的辯論。

"A Promised Land" is out now, everybody.

"應許之地 "已經上市了，各位。

We'll be right back with more "Tonight Show."

我們馬上回來，更多的 "今夜秀"。

Thank you so much! -Thank you, Jimmy.

謝謝你，非常感謝！-謝謝你，吉米