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  • Any true relationship between friends or significant others should be one between equals.

    任何真摯的關係都必須是對等的,不管是朋友之間,或是跟那些特別重要的人。

  • You give and take equally.

    平等地付出和回報。

  • One person’s needs aren’t met over another’s.

    不光是為了滿足別人的需求。

  • Friends and partners are supposed to give your energy, lift you up when youre down, and want the best for you.

    身為朋友和夥伴們,應該要能給予你能量、在你低潮時鼓勵你、並且為你設想。

  • But sometimes, we get into relationships that drain energy from us.

    但有時我們陷入的關係,反而會汲取我們的能量。

  • These are toxic relationships and they can negatively affect all aspects of our lives.

    這些像毒一般的關係會對我們的生活造成全盤性地負面影響。

  • On this week’s WellCast, were gonna show you how you can tell if youre even in a toxic relationship and then, were gonna help you extricate yourself from that unhealthy situation pronto.

    在這周的 WellCast 中,我們將告訴你如何分辨你是否身處一段有害的關係之中。接著,我們會教你如何迅速地使自己脫離這樣不健康的狀態。

  • Selfie 1: Diagnose the relationship.

    自我檢視第一步:診斷這段關係

  • How do you know for a friend or a partner’s bringing you down?

    要怎麼知道這個朋友或夥伴正在拖垮你?

  • Well, in much the same way that you know that youre coming down with a cold.

    這麼說吧!就像感冒時你總是無精打采的,這也一樣。

  • Toxic relationships come with symptoms.

    有害關係也伴隨一些症狀。

  • When youre around this person, how do you feel?

    當你待在這個人身邊時,你感覺如何?

  • Here are few other questions you should ask yourself if youre thinking you might be in a toxic situation.

    如果認為自己可能陷入一段有害關係時,這裡有幾個問題可以問問自己。

  • Does my friend put me down all the time?

    我的朋友總是令我感到情緒低迷嗎?

  • Are they jealous when I spend time with others?

    當我和其他人相處時,他們會因此感到嫉妒嗎?

  • Do they constantly bring out parts of me that they wanna change?

    他們老是說我有很多需要改變的地方嗎?

  • Do they take more than they give?

    他們是不是接受的比付出的多呢?

  • Am I only doing the things that they wanna do?

    我是不是變得只做他們想做的事呢?

  • Selfie 2: Recognize your role in the relationship.

    自我檢視第二步:認清你在這段關係所扮演的角色。

  • As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Nobody can make you feel INFERIOR without your consent."

    就像愛蓮娜‧羅斯福所說的:「沒有人能讓你感到自卑,除非你自己同意。」

  • Alright, look, we know we got that from "Princess Diaries" obviously.

    好吧!很明顯我們是在《麻雀變公主》這部電影裡看到這句話的。

  • Moving on, listen! You have autonomy in every relationship in your life.

    繼續,聽著!在你人生中的每段關係裡,你都擁有自主權。

  • If your friend or partner is stealing your sunshine, you need to figure out what youre doing to allow them to do this.

    如果你的朋友或夥伴正在偷走你的快樂,好好想想你的哪些舉動默許了他們這樣的行為。

  • Are you being a doormat?

    你是不是把自己搞得像個受氣包?

  • Are you putting this person’s emotional needs ahead of your own health?

    是不是把別人的情緒需求放在自己的健康之前?

  • Selfie 3: Start to build BOUNDARIES for this relationship.

    自我檢視第三步:開始建立這段關係的界線。

  • Does your friend invites himself over at all hours in the night?

    你的朋友是不是 24 小時不請自來,即便是晚上也一樣?

  • Are they constantly bossing you around?

    他們是不是成天指使你?

  • Are they always borrowing money from you?

    他們是不是總向你借錢?

  • Alright, once you know the boundary that you wanna set, stick to it.

    好的,一旦知道了自己設下的底線在哪後,堅守它。

  • Draw your line in the sand.

    劃清界線。

  • Selfie 4: Recognize you can’t change other people, but you can stop being a doormat.

    自我檢視第四步:明白你永遠無法改變他人,但你可以停止做出氣包。

  • If youve determined that a friendship or a relationship is toxic, you know that you have to change the nature of that relationship.

    如果已經認定這段友情或關係是有害的,你必須改變這段關係的本質。

  • Start by spending less time with that person and do your best to detach yourself emotionally.

    從減少和那個人的相處開始,並盡你所能地在情感上與他分離。

  • Hopefully setting boundaries will help you begin to phase this relationship out.

    希望設下界線會幫助你漸漸遠離這段關係。

  • Selfie 5: Get a second opinion.

    自我檢視第五步:尋求他人意見

  • Especially if youre emotionally vulnerable, the best thing you can do is surround yourself with people who love you and who want you to be happy and healthy.

    特別是如果你精神較為脆弱,最好的方法就是多與周遭愛你、希望你健康、開心的人相處。

  • Use them as a lifeline during this time.

    像拉住救命繩一樣依靠他們。

  • Selfie 6: Above all else, look out for yourself.

    自我檢視第六步:除了上述的要點外,照顧好自己。

  • Studies have shown that people with low self-esteem are far more likely to find themselves in toxic relationships.

    研究顯示,低自尊的人較有可能陷入有害的關係中。

  • You will never be treated with love and respect unless you absolutely believe that you deserve these things.

    你永遠無法被愛和尊重,除非你先深深相信自己值得擁有這些。

  • Remember, you teach people how to treat you.

    記住,是你教會你身邊的人如何對待你。

  • So do yourself a favor of loving yourself.

    所以幫自己一個忙,好好愛自己。

  • That’s the first step to any relationship.

    這是所有關係的第一步。

  • To recap, if you have diagnosed yourself as being in a toxic relationship, the first step is recognizing this.

    總結一下,如果已經判定自己身處一段有害關係中,第一步就是要看清事實。

  • Then, recognizing your role in a relationship.

    然後認清自己在這段關係中所扮演的角色。

  • Once you do this, you can start to set boundaries for this relationship and change the way you interact with this person.

    如此,你就可以開始設下這段關係的界線,並改變和那人相處的方式。

  • To help, surround yourself with people who love you.

    讓自己身邊環繞著愛你的人。

  • And above all else, look out for yourself.

    除此之外,記得照顧自己。

  • Well, that’s all from me today, WellCasters.

    這些就是今天的所有內容了,各位 WellCasters。

  • Would you do me a kindness?

    可以幫我一個忙嗎?

  • Subscribe to our channel. Sign up for our newsletter to receive sneak peaks and another awesome stuff.

    訂閱我們的頻道,註冊電子報,並搶先看其他優質內容。

  • See you later!

    下次見!

Any true relationship between friends or significant others should be one between equals.

任何真摯的關係都必須是對等的,不管是朋友之間,或是跟那些特別重要的人。

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如何停止傷害自己的友誼關係?(Wellcast - Toxic People: How to End a Bad Relationship)

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    Go Tutor 發佈於 2022 年 01 月 21 日
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