PROMISED LAND," PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA.

承諾的土地，"總統巴拉克-奧巴馬。

MR. PRESIDENT, YOU'RE FAMOUS FOR YOUR COMPETITIVENESS.

先生。主席，你是以競爭性著稱的。

WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE ME ON IN A GAME OF WASTE BASKET BALL.

你想和我打一場垃圾球嗎？

>> ABSOLUTELY.

>> 當然。

>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT, LET'S HIT SOME BASHETS.

>> Stephen:好吧，讓我們打一些籃板球。

>> LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION: DID HE PRACTICE A LOT ON THIS

>> 讓我問你一個問題：他在這上面練習了很多嗎？

WHOLE WASTE BASKET BASKETBALL IDEA?

WHOLE WASTE BASKET BASKETBALL IDEA?

HAS HE BEEN PRACTICING, LIKE, ALL MONTH FOR THIS.

他一直在練習，喜歡，整個月的這個。

>> Stephen: NO!

>> Stephen:不！

WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE SOME PRACTICE SHOTS FIRST?

你想先進行一些練習射擊嗎？

WOULD YOU LIKE TO TAKE SOME PRACTICE SHOTS.

你要不要來點練習鏡頭。

>> I DON'T NEED PRACTICE SHOTS.

>> 我不需要練習射擊。

AGAINST YOU.

對付你。

>> Stephen: ALL RIGHT, BASHET'S RIGHT OVER THERE.

>> 好的，BASHET就在那邊。

INSIDE YOUR THING OVER HERE.

在你的東西在這裡。

>> OH, I ALREADY HAVE MY-- YOU.

>> 哦，我已經有了我的... ... 你。

>> Stephen: ALREADY HAVE YOURS RIGHT THERE.

>> Stephen: 已經有你的了，就在那裡。

THERE ARE 10 PAPER BALLS.

有10個紙球。

YOURS IS A YELLOW LEGAL PAD, WHICH I BELIEVE IS HOW YOU WROTE

你的是一個黃色的法律墊，我相信這是你寫的。

YOUR BOOK.

YOUR BOOK.

>> WHAT IS YOUR S.

>> 你是什麼人？

>> Stephen: I HAVE BLUE SCRIPT PAPER.

>> Stephen: 我有藍色的稿紙。

>> HOW COME IT SEEMS LIKE YOURS IS CRUMPLED UP MORE.

>> 怎麼好像你的更多。

>> Stephen: BECAUSE I SQUEEZED THEM.

>> Stephen:因為我捏了他們。

>> NOT ONLY DID YOU PRACTICE-- LOOK AT THIS ONE-- LOOK AT THIS

>> 你不僅練習了 -- 看看這個 -- 看看這個。

ONE COMPARED TO YOURS.

一個與你的相比。

>> Stephen: TAKE A MOMENT.

>> Stephen:花點時間。

TAKE A MOMENT.

花點時間。

>> AND...

>> 還有...

>> Stephen: DO YOU WANT TO TRADE BALLS?

>> 你想交易球嗎？

>> NO, BUT I JUST THINK AS A MATTER OF PRINCIPLE, THE FACT

>> 不，但我只是認為作為一個原則問題，事實。

THAT YOU DIDN'T......

THAT YOU DIDN'T......

>> Stephen: SO HEREs.

>> 史蒂芬：所以這裡。

IT'S JUST 10.

這只是10。

>> S.>> ARE WE TIMING THIS OR AR JUST GOING TO GO "10."

S. >> S. >> 我們是在計時還是要去 "10"。

>> Stephen: WE CAN SHOOT AT THE SAME TIME, IF YOU WANT.

>> 如果你願意，我們可以同時開槍。

>> I JUST DON'T TRUST YOU.

>> 我只是不相信你。

ALL RIGHT, COME ON, LET'S GO.

好了，來吧，我們走吧。

>> Stephen: DO YOU WANT TO MAKE IT INTERESTING?

>> Stephen:你想讓它變得有趣嗎？

IF-- IF I WIN, YOU HAVE TO MENTION ME IN YOUR NEXT BOOK.

如果 -- 如果我贏了，你必須在你的下一本書裡提到我。

>> AND WHAT IF I WIN.

>> 如果我贏了呢？

>> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU WANT?

>> Stephen:你想要什麼？

>> NOBODY'S GOING TO READ YOUR BOOK ANYWAY, SO

>> 反正沒人會看你的書，所以... ...

( LAUGHTER ) IT DOESN'T MATTER.

（笑）這並不重要。

I'M NOT GOING TO LOSE.

我不會輸的。

YOU READY.

你準備好了嗎？

>> Stephen: HOW ABOUT THIS: HOW ABOUT I'LL MAKE A DONATION

>> Stephen:不如這樣吧：我捐點錢如何？

TO YOUR LIBRARY.

TO YOUR LIBRARY.

>> NOW, THAT-- THAT IS IS WORTH-- WORTH-- IS THIS AN EQUAL

>> 現在，那 -- 那是值得 -- 值得 -- 這是一個平等的。

DISTANCE, BY THE WAY?

距離，順便說一下？

>> Stephen: THEY MEASURED IS OUT.

>> Stephen:他們測量的是出。

>> ALL RIGHT.

>> 好的。

READY?

準備好了嗎？

>> Stephen: YUP.

>> Stephen:是的

>> WE'RE TERRIBLE!

>> 我們是可怕的！

( BELL RINGS ).

（鐘聲）

>> Stephen: PRESSURE'S ON.

>> Stephen:壓力的上。

>> OH!

>> 哦！

>> Stephen: YOU GOTTA-- ( BELL RINGS ).

>> Stephen:你得 - （鐘聲響起）：

>> Stephen: OH, NO!

>> Stephen:哦，不！

>> OH, MAN!

>> 哦，夥計！

( BELL RINGS ).

（鐘聲）

>> Stephen: IT'S WHAT I DO!

>> Stephen:這就是我的工作！

IT'S WHAT I DO.

這就是我的工作。

>> IT'S NOT FINISHED YET.

>> 它還沒有完成。

HOW MANY MORE YOU HAVE GOT.

你還有多少人。

>> Stephen: I GOT FIVE MORE OVER HERE.

>> Stephen:我有五個更多的在這裡。

>> I HAVE TO MAKE AT LEAST THESE LAST THREE.

>> 我至少要做最後這三件事。

>> I'M SPENDING ALL MY TIME CRUMPLING MY BALLS HERE.

>> 我把所有的時間都浪費在這裡了。

ALL RIGHT.

好吧。

OH!

哦！

THAT WAS SO CLOSE.

好險啊

( BELL RINGS.

(鐘聲響起)

>> COLBERT, I'M GETTING CRUSHED.

>> COLBERT，我被壓扁了。

LAUGHS ) ( BELL RINGS )

（笑）（鐘聲響起）。

OH, MAN!

哦，夥計！

( BELL RINGS ) >> OH!

（鐘聲響起） >> 哦！

OH!

哦！

( BELL RINGS ).

（鐘聲）

>> Stephen: WOOOOO!

>> Stephen:嗚嗚！

>> I DIDN'T EVEN HIT ONE.

>> 我甚至沒有擊中一個。

HOW AM I GOING TO LIVE THIS DOWN?

我怎麼才能活下來？

HOLD ON A SECOND.

等一下。

I GOT ONE MORE.

我還有一個。

>> Stephen: THIS IS FOR EVERYTHING.

>> Stephen:這是為一切。

OH!

哦！

( BELL RINGS ).

（鐘聲）

>> Stephen: YOU LET ME WIN.

>> Stephen:你讓我贏了。

>> NO, LOOK AT ME.

>> 不，看著我。

( LAUGHTER ) ALL RIGHT.

（笑）所有權利。

>> Stephen: THAT MADE THIS MY FARCHT INTERVIEW OF ALL TIME.

>> Stephen:這讓我的FARCHT採訪成為了歷史的一部分

>> YEAH, YEAH.

>>YEAH，YEAH。

I WILL NEVER-- I'VE LOST MY SWAG ON "STEPHEN COLBERT."

我永遠不會... 我已經失去了我的SWAG "史蒂芬-科爾伯特"。

>> Stephen: REALLY, VERY LAST QUESTION.

>> Stephen:真的，最後一個問題。

NOT EVEN A QUESTION, JUST A STATEMENT-- THANK YOU FOR BEING

甚至不是一個問題，只是一個聲明 - 謝謝你是

PRESIDENT.

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