♪ >> Stephen: WELCOME BACK,

>> Stephen:歡迎回來。

EVERYBODY.

每個人。

AS YOU KNOW, DUE TO THE PANDEMIC, THE RELEASE OF A LOT

你知道，由於PANDEMIC，釋放了大量的。

OF BIG HOLLYWOOD MOVIES HAVE BEEN DELAYED.

盛大的好萊塢電影已經被延後了。

IN FACT, WE EVEN HAD TO DELAY THE RELEASE OF A SEGMENT I SHOT

事實上，我們甚至不得不延後發佈我拍攝的一個片段。

SIX MONTHS AGO ABOUT THE DELAYED RELEASE OF BIG HOLLYWOOD MOVIES.

六個月前，關於好萊塢大電影的延遲發行。

THANKFULLY, I CAN FINALLY SHOW IT TO YOU NOW.

謝謝你，我現在終於可以給你看了。

HERE'S A CONVERSATION I HAD A FEW MONTHS AGO WITH MY DEAR OLD

下面是我幾個月前和我親愛的老夥計的對話。

FRIEND STEVE CARELL.

FRIEND STEVE CARELL.

WE'RE HERE WITH OUR FRIEND STEVE CARELL.

我們在這裡與我們的朋友史蒂夫-卡勒。

STEVE, THANKS SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE TONIGHT.

史蒂夫，非常感謝你今晚在這裡。

>> YEAH, WHATEVER.

>> 是的，什麼都可以。

>> Stephen: OKAY.

>> Stephen:好的

YOU KNOW, STEVE, YOU ALWAYS HAVE SO MANY PROJECTS GOING AT THE

你知道嗎，史蒂夫，你總是有這麼多的項目在進行。

SAME TIME, SUCH A BUSY MAN, BUT, YOU KNOW, UNFORTUNATELY, SO MANY

同一時間，這樣一個忙碌的人，但是，你知道，不幸的是，這麼多。

PROJECTS ARE BEING DELAYED RIGHT NOW, AND EVEN FILMS THAT ARE

項目被延後，現在，甚至電影，是。

SHOW AREN'T BEING RELEASED BECAUSE THERE ARE NO THEATERS

因為沒有電影院，所以不放了。

OPEN.

開放。

>> YEAH, IT'S A TRICKY SITUATION.

>> 是的，這是個棘手的情況。

>> Stephen: WELL SAID.

>> Stephen:說的好。

NOW, YOU AND I -- >> (LAUGHING).

現在，你和我 - >> （笑）：

>> Stephen: I REALIZE I DIDN'T ASK YOU A QUESTION I JUST LEFT A

>> 斯蒂芬：我意識到我沒有問你一個問題，我只是留下了一個問題。

SPACE IN THE SENTENCE FOR YOU TO FILL IN.

在句子中留出空間讓你填寫。

SO I DON'T BLAME YOU FOR BEING SLIGHTLY TAS TURN IN YOUR

所以我不怪你，因為你在你的生活中被輕視了。

RESPONSE.

答覆：

THAT'S ON ME.

這是我。

THAT'S ON ME.

這是我。

>> (LAUGHING) BUT YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK I'M PLAYING THE

>> 但你知道嗎，我想我在玩的是...

CHARACTER OF, HEY, I'M GOING TO BE THE GUEST WHO'S NOT GOING TO

角色的，嘿，我要成為客人 誰也不會去的。

HELP HIM OUT.

幫他出去。

( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: NOW, HERE'S THE

（笑） >> 斯蒂芬：現在，這裡是

THING, ALL THESE MOVIES ARE BEING PUSHED, YOU KNOW, AND

事情，所有這些電影都被推，你知道，和。

THEY'RE NOT BEING RELEASED, AND SOME PEOPLE MAY NEVER SEE THESE

他們不會被釋放，有些人可能永遠不會看到這些... ...

MOVIES, THEY MAY NEVER BE RELEASED, INCLUDING ALL THE

電影，他們可能永遠不會被釋放，包括所有的。

MOVIES YOU AND I MADE IN THE LAST YEAR.

你和我去年拍的電影。

>> AND WE HAVE A LOT.

>> 我們有很多。

>> Stephen: SO MANY I FORGOT -- A, I FORGOT THAT WE

>> 史蒂芬：很多我忘了 -- A，我忘了，我們。

MADE THEM.

做了它們。

>> I EKNOW, BUT THEY WERE FUN TO WORK ON WITH YOU.

>> 我知道，但和你一起工作很有趣。

>> Stephen: I REMEMBER ENJOYING DOING THEM, BUT I DON'T

>> 史蒂芬：我記得很喜歡做這些，但我不喜歡。

REMEMBER WHAT THEY WERE, WHAT THEY WERE CALLED, WHO WE PLAYED

記住他們的身份，他們的名字，我們扮演的角色

OR WHAT THE PLOT WAS.

或什麼情節是。

>> YEAH, IT'S ALL A BLUR.

>> 是的，這一切都很模糊。

>> Stephen: THANKFULLY, MY GRAPHICS DEPARTMENT MADE UP

>> Stephen:謝天謝地，我的圖文部做了。

POSTERS FOR ALL THESE MOVIES THAT NEITHER YOU NOR I CAN

這些電影的海報，你和我都不能。

REMEMBER AND WE'LL TRY TO REMEMBER THE MOVIES NOW BY

記住，我們會試著記住現在的電影。

LOOKING AT THE POSTERS.

看著海報。

ARE YOU PREPARED TO DO THIS?

你準備好做這個了嗎？

>> YEAH, THIS WILL BE A NICE TRIP DOWN MEMORY LANE.

>> 是的，這將是一次愉快的回憶之旅。

>> Stephen: WELL, GOOD, BECAUSE THIS IS "MAYBE COMING

>> Stephen:好吧，好吧，因為這是 "可能的未來"。

SOON."

SOON."

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

WELCOME TO "MAYBE COMING SOON" WHERE STEVE AND I WILL LOOK AT

歡迎來到 "也許很快就會到來"，在這裡，我和史蒂夫會看看。

MOVIE POSTERS FROM MOVIES WE MADE THAT WE CAN'T REMEMBER AND

我們拍的電影的海報，我們不能記住和

TRY TO REMEMBER.

試著記住。

JIM, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT THE FIRST POSTER.

吉姆，讓我們來看看第一張海報。

WHAT DID STEVE AND I DO?

我和史蒂夫做了什麼？

THE DRACULA PILL.

DRACULA藥丸。

THIS DRUG COULD UNLEASH YOUR BRAIN'S POTENTIAL TO BE DRACULA.

這種藥物可以釋放你的大腦的潛力是DRACULA。

>> OH, MY GOD I FOUGHT SO HARD FOR FIRST BILLING ON THIS.

>> 哦，我的上帝，我花了這麼多的努力為第一賬單在這。

>> Stephen: YEAH.

>> Stephen:是的。

REMEMBER, WE WENT BACK AND FORTH, DRACULA PILL,

記住，我們來來回回，德拉庫拉丸。

COLBERT-CARELL OR CARELL-COLBERT.

COLBERT-CARELL或CARELL-COLBERT。

WAS MY NAME GOING TO BE FIRST BUT LOWER AND YOUR NAME WAS

我的名字會是第一個，但較低，而你的名字是。

GOING TO BE SECOND BUT HIGHER?

會是第二但更高？

AND I THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ACQUIESCING ON THAT.

我非常感謝你的詢問。

>> Stephen: WELL, YOU'RE WELCOME, YOU KNOW.

>> Stephen:好吧，你是歡迎的，你知道的。

WE EACH GAVE UP SOMETHING, YOU KNOW.

我們都放棄了一些東西，你知道的。

WE EACH GIVE SOMETHING.

我們每個人都會付出一些東西。

I REMEMBER YOU WANTED YOUR NAME TO BE IN THAT DRIPPY BLOOD FONT

我記得你想讓你的名字出現在那個 "血滴子 "字體上

FROM THE MUNSTERS, AND I SAID, NO, BUT I'M DRACULA, WHY WOULD

我說："不，但我是德拉庫拉，為什麼要這樣做？

YOU GET THE DRIPPY BLOOD FONT.

你得到的DRIPPY BLOOD字體。

>> YEAH, WELL, YOU WERE THE TITLE CHARACTER.

>> 是啊，好吧，你是標題人物。

>> Stephen: SURE, I AM.

>> Stephen: SURE, I AM.

ROGER PILL.

ROGER PILL.

>> WELL, LET'S JUST BREAK DOWN THE PREMISE ITSELF.

>> 好吧，讓我們只是打破了場地本身。

AS A SCIENTIST, I DEVELOPED THIS EENORMOUS PILL THAT I AM GOING

作為一個科學家，我開發了這個EENORMOUS藥丸，我將。

TO USE AS A SUPPOSITORY TO TURN PEOPLE INTO VAMPIRES.

用來作為一個寄託，把人變成吸血鬼。

I MEET YOU AT THE HEALTH CLUB BUN WAY, HELLO, MY NAME IS ROGER

我在健康俱樂部的包子路上見到你，你好，我叫羅傑。

PILL.

PILL.

>> Stephen: I'M ON THE SQUAT MACHINE.

>> 我在蹲式機器上。

>> RIGHT, WHICH STRUCK MY CHARACTER --

>> 對，這打動了我的性格 --

>> Stephen: AS HANDY.

>> Stephen:如同手邊的。

WHAT'S THAT?

那是什麼？

>> Stephen: AS HANDY.

>> Stephen:如同手邊的。

( LAUGHTER ) JIM.

（笑）吉姆：

>> OH, THAT BIONIC EYE.

>> 哦，那仿生眼。

THAT THING WAS -- THAT THING WAS THE DEATH OF ME.

那件事是... 那件事是我的死期。

>> Stephen: A NIGHTMARE.

>> Stephen:一個噩夢。

HOW MANY HOURS IN THE MAKEUP CHAIR EVERY DAY?

每天在化妝椅上坐多少個小時？

>> IT WAS LIKE 16 HOURS A DAY OF MAKEUP.

>> 每天化妝16小時。

THEY'D ACTUALLY FOLD MY ACTUAL EYEBALL OUT TO THE SIDE SO THEY

他們居然把我的真實眼球折到了一邊，這樣他們就可以...

COULD FIND A RECESS WITHIN MY EYE SOCKET TO PUT THAT LIGHT

可以在我的眼罩裡找到一個凹槽來放那盞燈

UNIT.

訓研所：

>> Stephen: WHY NOT DO IT DIGITALLY.

>> 斯蒂芬：為什麼不做數字化。

>> WELL, RIGHT.

>> 好吧，沒錯。

I THINK THAT MIGHT HAVE BEEN EASIER ON ME, BUT THE

我覺得這樣對我來說可能更容易，但是... ...

PRODUCERS -- AND I WAS A PRODUCER, SO I COULD HAVE SAID

製作人 -- 我是一個製作人，所以我可以有說。

SOMETHING.

一些事情。

>> Stephen: BUT NO ONE COULD UNDERSTAND A DAMN WORD YOU WERE

>> 史蒂芬：但沒有人聽懂你說的一個字。

SAYING OVER THE SCREAMING BECAUSE IT WAS JUST HORRIBLE TO

說過的尖叫，因為它只是可怕的，以

LOOK AT, HORRIBLE PROCESS TO LOOK AT, AND ON A CERTAIN LEVEL,

看，可怕的過程看，並在一定程度上。

I'M GLAD THIS ONE'S NOT COMING OUT.

我很高興這一個不出來。

SAD.

傷心。

SAD.

傷心。

>> YEAH.

>> 是的。

>> Stephen: YEP.

>> Stephen:是的。

LAURA WAS GREAT IN THIS, TOO.

勞拉是偉大的在這一點，太。

>> Stephen: SHE MADE MARMEE.

>> 她做了MARMEE。

HUH?

咦？

YOU WERE GOING TO SAY.

你想說的是，

>> Stephen: MARMEE.

>> Stephen:瑪麗：

YES.

是的。

>> Stephen: JIM?

>> Stephen:吉姆？

OH, MAN!

哦，夥計！

>> Stephen: I AM DYING FOR THIS ONE TO COME OUT.

>> 史蒂芬：我正等著這一部出來。

>> ME, TOO!

>> 我也是！

THIS ONE -- AH!

這一個 - 啊！

THIS ONE, I REMEMBER REALLY WELL.

這一個，我記得很清楚。

REMEMBER?

記得嗎？

>> Stephen: YES, WHEN -- OKAY --

>> Stephen:是的，什麼時候 - 好吧 -

>> Stephen: YOU -- GO AHEAD.

>> Stephen:你... ...先走吧

>> Stephen: NO.

>> Stephen:編號：

PLEASE, START.

求你了，開始吧。

>> THAT SHARK.

>> 那隻鯊魚。

>> Stephen: THAT SHARK.

>> Stephen:那鯊魚。

I REMEMBER -- >> Stephen: SO FUNNY.

我記得 -- >> 史蒂芬：如此有趣。

HE SMELLED SO BAD!

他聞起來很臭！

(LAUGHING) YOU WERE, LIKE, I'M GOING TO GRAB THE FRONT OF THE

(笑)你是說，好像，我要去抓前面的車了

SHARK.

鯊魚：

I'M, LIKE, OKAY, YOU SPELL THAT SHARK'S BREATH!

我，喜歡，好吧，你拼，鯊魚的呼吸！

>> Stephen: THE SHARK WAS -- I MEAN, BAD BREATH!

>> 鯊魚是 -- 我的意思是，壞氣！

>> Stephen: AND I WAS, LIKE, WHY CAN'T SOMEBODY WASH THIS

>> Stephen:我是，喜歡，為什麼不能有人洗這個。

SHARK BEFORE WE SHOOT?

鯊魚之前，我們拍攝？

THEY'RE, LIKE, IT'S LIVING IN WATER, IT'S ALWAYS BEING WASHED.

它們就像生活在水裡一樣，一直在被清洗。

>> IT'S GOING TO SMELL, NO MATTER WHAT WE DO.

>> 不管我們怎麼做，都會有氣味。

>> Stephen: OH, GOSH!

>> Stephen:哦，天哪！

AND TRYING TO GET THE SHARK FROM ALBUQUERQUE, NEW MEXICO,

並試圖從新墨西哥州的阿爾布克克得到鯊魚。

FOR THE -- >> Stephen: FOR THE BIG

對於 -- >> Stephen:為了大的

CONCERT.

音樂會：

>> FOR THE CONCERT.

>> 對於音樂會。

( LAUGHTER ) THIS WHOLE THING WAS JUMP A JOY.

（笑）這整個事情是跳躍的喜悅。

>> Stephen: SOMETIMES YOU'RE ASKED TO LEARN THINGS FOR A

>> 斯蒂芬: 有時你被要求學習一些東西，為了一個人的利益。

MOVIE OR A PROJECT, LIKE, YOU KNOW, KEANU REEVES HAD TO LEARN

電影或項目，就像，你知道，基努-裡維斯不得不學習。

KUNG FU FOR THE MATRIX MOVIES.

功夫的矩陣電影。

>> YEAH.

>> 是的。

>> Stephen: AND YOU AND I BOTH HAD TO LEARN HOW TO TAG GREAT

>> Stephen:而你和我都必須學會如何標記偉大的。

WHITE SHARKS.

白鯊。

>> AND I'LL NEVER FORGET IT.

>> 我永遠不會忘記它。

THAT WAS FUN.

這很有趣。

>> Stephen: YEAH.

>> Stephen:是的。

IT WAS FUN.

它是有趣的。

AND JOSEPH, WHO ORIGINALLY TAUGHT US HOW TO DO IT.

和約瑟夫，誰最初教我們如何做。

>> Stephen: YASH, HE WILL BE MISSED.

>> Stephen:呀，他將會被錯過。

>> HE WAS A WONDERFUL MAN.

>> 他是一個神奇的人。

AND I -- >> Stephen: YOU AND HE REALLY

而我 -- >> 你和他真的。

HIT IT OFF.

打掉它。

THE TWO OF YOU -- I WAS A LITTLE JEALOUS HOW THE TWO OF YOU HIT

"你們倆"--我有點嫉妒 "你們倆 "怎麼打的？

IT OFF.

它關閉。

>> I WISH WE HADN'T BECAUSE THEN WHEN WE LOST HIM, IT WAS THAT

>> 我希望我們沒有這樣做，因為當我們失去他的時候，就是這樣。

MUCH MORE PAINFUL.

更多的痛苦。

I WISH I HAD SORT OF KEPT MY DISTANCE.

我希望能保持一定的距離。

I DO THAT NOW.

我現在就做。

I DON'T GET CLOSE TO PEOPLE ESPECIALLY IF THEY'RE DOING

我不靠近別人，特別是如果他們正在做

SOMETHING DANGEROUS.

危險的事情。

>> Stephen: WITH SHARKS?

>> Stephen:與鯊魚？

I JUST -- >> Stephen: I'M NOT GOING TO

我只是 -- >> 我不打算去

WIN ANY FRIENDS FOR SAYING THIS, I MIGHT GET BLOWBACK FOR SAYING

贏取任何朋友說這句話，我可能會得到回擊說，

THIS, BUT I THINK HE, ON A CERTAIN LEVEL, HAD IT COMING.

這一點，但我認為他，在一定程度上，有它的到來。

HE WAS ASKING FOR IT.

他是自找的。

>> MM-HMM.

>> MM-HMM。

>> Stephen: HE GOES IN -- HE GOES IN TO THE SHARK TANK, AND

>> 他走了進去 -- 他走了進去的鯊魚池，和。

WE'RE, LIKE, TAKE OFF YOUR LUCKY HAM.

我們是，喜歡，脫掉你的幸運火腿。

>> YEAH.

>> 是的。

>> Stephen: HE'S, LIKE, NO.

>> Stephen:他，喜歡，沒有。

NO.

編號：

IT'S ALWAYS -- IT'S ALWAYS BEEN GOOD FOR ME BEFORE.

它總是... ... 它總是對我以前的好。

>> HE CARED ABOUT THAT HAM TOO MUCH AND AT THE EXPENSE OF HIS

>> 他太在乎那隻火腿了，而且還犧牲了自己的生命。

LIFE.

生活。

>> Stephen: YEAH.

>> Stephen:是的。

DEDICATED.

專用於：

THIS MOVIE'S DEDICATED TO HIM.

這部電影是獻給他的。

>> WELL, THAT WAS ACTUALLY TAKEN OFF AT THE END.

>> 好吧，這實際上是在最後的時候脫手的。

>> Stephen: REALLY?

>> Stephen:真的嗎？

WE DIDN'T -- WELL, IT'S SO -- THE MOVIE'S SO MUCH FUN.

我們沒有 - 好吧，它是如此 - 電影是如此有趣。

>> Stephen: RIGHT.

>> Stephen:右邊。

AND IT'S JUST THE HI JINX AND IT'S SUCH A FARCE THAT WE DIDN'T

這只是HI JINX，它是如此的費力，我們沒有。

WANT TO END WITH THAT BECAUSE WE THOUGHT --

我想以這句話結束，因為我們認為...

>> Stephen: WHAT ABOUT JUST INSTEAD OF, LIKE, NO ANIMALS

>> 史蒂芬：沒有動物怎麼辦，比如說，沒有動物。

WERE HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THIS MOVIE, BUT A LOT OF PEOPLE.

在這部電影的製作過程中受到了傷害，但很多人。

WHAT ABOUT SOMETHING SIMPLE LIKE THAT?

這麼簡單的事情怎麼做？

>> YEAH.

>> 是的。

>> Stephen: WELL, STEVE, A JOY.

>> Stephen:好了，史蒂夫，一個快樂。

LISTEN, WE'VE GOT TO -- I'LL SEE YOU AT ALL THESE PREMIERES, IF

聽著，我們一定要 - 我會看到你在所有這些首映式，如果 -

ANY OF THEM COME OUT.

他們中的任何一個出來。

>> I CANNOT -- I CAN'T WAIT FOR AAQUARIUM.

>> 我不能... 我不能等著 "水球"。

>> Stephen: MIGHT HAVE TO.

>> Stephen:可能不得不這樣做。

IT'S A GOOD ONE.

這是一個很好的一個。

>> Stephen: WE'RE BEING SUED BY JOE'S FAMILY.

>> Stephen:我們被喬的家人起訴了。

JUST -- AND THEY'VE GOT A GOOD CASE.

只是... ... 他們有一個很好的案例。

THEY'VE GOT A DAMN GOOD CASE.

他們有一個很好的案子。

STEVE, PEACE, MY BROTHER.

史蒂夫，和平，我的兄弟。

>> YOU, TOO, TAKE CARE.

>> 你也要注意。

>> Stephen: THANK YOU, STEVE CARELL.

>> 史蒂芬：謝謝你，史蒂夫-凱爾。

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A PERFORMANCE BY SARA BAREILLES.

我們馬上回來，由SARA BAREILLES表演。

♪ ♪

♪ ♪