Now I'm normally pretty passionate about personal development.

現在我平時對個人發展很有熱情。

But this year has been crazy.

但今年已經瘋狂了。

I've treated my growth like my motherfucking job.

我把我的成長當做我他媽的工作。

If self help will crack, I have been smoking crack this entire time and lots of it.

如果自助會破解，我這段時間一直在吸食破解，而且吸得很多。

And one thing that occurred to me is that I should ask all the people who are closest to me what they think my biggest flies because they know me best.

而我想到的一件事是，我應該問問所有和我最親近的人，他們認為我最大的蒼蠅是什麼，因為他們最瞭解我。

Because I have no objectivity when it comes to myself.

因為我在對待自己的時候，沒有客觀性。

And you might be wondering, you know why?

你可能想知道，你知道為什麼嗎？

Why would you do that?

你為什麼要這麼做？

Do you like pain?

你喜歡痛苦嗎？

Do you wanna cry?

你想哭嗎？

That sounds like a terrible idea, but no, it's not.

這聽起來像一個可怕的想法，但不，它不是。

It is, in fact, fascinating to hear the people you love the most.

其實，聽到你最愛的人的聲音，是很迷人的。

Tell you what your biggest freaking problem is, and I will admit, OK, I went into this and naively thinking, like in the back of my mind.

告訴你你最大的畸形問題是什麼，我承認，好吧，我進入這個，天真地想，就像在我的腦海裡。

Maybe they just don't have anything to say.

也許他們只是無話可說。

I mean, I've been in therapy for so long, you know?

我的意思是，我已經在治療這麼久，你知道嗎？

You know, itself helps kind of thing.

你知道，本身就有幫助的那種東西。

So maybe when I asked them to just be like E can't really think of anything at all.

所以可能我問他們的時候，只是像E真的什麼都想不起來。

You're perfect.

你是完美的。

And I'm a silly little fool.

而我是一個愚蠢的小傻瓜。

Yeah, pretty silly little fucking fool.

是啊，相當愚蠢的小傻瓜。

Now, a word of caution.

現在，要提醒一下。

Do not ask people this if you're not fully ready to hear the answer.

如果你還沒有完全準備好聽答案，就不要問別人這個問題。

I was and am really down for criticism of myself as a human being because I wanna be better.

我過去和現在都很願意接受對自己做人的責備，因為我想變得更好。

I am just naturally curious about what people think of May and I have the time to mentally prepare to hear their opinions without any defensiveness.

我只是自然而然地好奇大家對梅的看法，我有時間做心理準備，聽聽他們的意見，不做任何辯解。

So though I encourage you to also seek out your flies, don't do it if you ain't ready.

所以，雖然我鼓勵你也去尋找你的蒼蠅，但如果你還沒有準備好，就不要去做。

So here's what they said.

所以他們是這麼說的。

And the most interesting thing I wanna point out now is that every person I asked preface their flaw with almost this exact sentence.

而我現在最想指出的是，我問過的每一個人都用幾乎是這句話來為自己的缺陷作序。

Well, it's also a lot of strength, but fascinating, and I'll come back to that later.

嗯，這也是一種實力，但很吸引人，我以後會再講。

But now friend once said, Well, it's also a strength, but I would say your need to control is probably your biggest flaw.

但現在朋友曾經說過，嗯，這也是一種優勢，但我想說的是，你對控制的需求可能是你最大的缺陷。

I mean, it's good because it allows you to like Rama said and like, be a boss.

我的意思是，這是很好的，因為它可以讓你像Rama說的那樣，成為一個老闆。

But whenever you feel out of control, you just spiral.

但每當你感到失控時，你就會螺旋式上升。

That one was surprising because I kind of know I'm a control freak, but I didn't realize everyone else also knew how much of a control freak I waas friend to said.

這個是令人驚訝的，因為我有點知道我是一個控制狂，但我不知道其他人也知道我是一個控制狂，我waas朋友說。

Well, it's like also one of your strengths, but I feel like you kind of have a chip on your shoulder.

嗯，這就像也是你的優勢之一， 但我覺得你有一種芯片在你的肩膀上。

And so you feel like you have tow work so much harder than everybody else, like prove that you belong there.

所以你覺得你要比別人更努力地工作，比如證明你屬於那裡。

I don't know if it's because that you're like a woman or like a woman of color, but it's always like you're working three times harder to prove that you're just a good as the guys that one really threw me.

我不知道是因為你像個女人還是像個有色人種，但總覺得你要付出三倍的努力來證明你和那些男人一樣優秀，這一點真的讓我很感動。

I didn't see that coming at all, But once I thought about it, I was like, Okay, I can totally see that.

我完全沒有看到這一點， 但一旦我想到它，我想， 好吧，我完全可以看到這一點。

I see how that's the thing.

我明白了這是怎麼一回事。

Uh huh.

嗯哼。

And finally, Friend three said, Well, it's hard because I think it's a strength.

最後，朋友三說，嗯，這很難，因為我覺得這是一種力量。

But sometimes you get really obsessed and this could be good, because if you get obsessed with a new idea or project the next time I see you, it's like, done.

但有時你會很著迷，這可能是好的，因為如果你迷上了一個新的想法或項目，下一次我看到你，就像，完成了。

But then I've seen you get obsessed with a person, and that seems really emotionally exhausting for you, and it definitely is for me.

但我見過你迷戀一個人，那對你來說似乎真的很耗費感情，對我來說肯定也是。

Oh, I know, Um, I'm well aware of that one, and I am working on it.

哦，我知道，嗯，我很清楚這一點，我正在努力。

But what I loved about this exercise was that it made me realize all of our flaws are probably our strengths, just the flip side of them.

但我喜歡這個練習的原因是，它讓我意識到我們所有的缺點可能都是我們的優點，只是缺點的反面。

Because when I think about some of my friends and their flaws, I think the exact same thing, like one of my friends, could be super judgmental and callous and not very compassionate.

因為當我想到我的一些朋友和他們的缺點時，我覺得完全一樣，比如我的一個朋友，可能是超級判斷力和冷酷無情，不是很有同情心。

But it also makes her incredibly observational accurate about people's characters, and Woody is hell.

但這也讓她對人的性格觀察得非常準確，伍迪就是地獄。

Another friend could be kind of thoughtless and insensitive about your feelings.

另一個朋友可能會對你的感情有點不以為然，不敏感。

But this exact quality also makes him impervious to other people's opinions of him and allows him to create art with a really unique voice without ever feeling discouraged or influenced by whatever's popular.

但正是這種特質，也讓他對別人對他的看法看不透，讓他在創作藝術時能發出真正獨特的聲音，而不會覺得氣餒或受任何流行事物的影響。

My last friend is super self defeating and could be afraid to even try.

我最後一個朋友超級自暴自棄，可連嘗試都不敢。

But this makes her cautious, calculated, really good at evaluating risk.

但這讓她變得謹慎，計算，真的很擅長評估風險。

And whenever she does decide to do something, she does a 210%.

而每當她決定做某件事時，她都會做一個210%的決定。

So all of the things that are wrong with us can be right with us if we know how to manage them and use the aspect of these qualities that serve us.

所以，只要我們懂得管理，利用這些品質的方面為我們服務，我們所有的錯誤都可以成為正確的事情。

So what are your flaws?

那麼你的缺點是什麼？

Or I guess I should say, Are you brave enough to find out?

或者我想我應該說，你有勇氣去發現嗎？

I'm Anaconda and I'm a I'm gonna obsessive control freak with the chip on her shoulder.

我是蟒蛇，我是一個我要去強迫控制的怪胎，她的肩膀上的芯片。

But you know awareness.

但你知道意識。

Step one Thank you to square space for sponsoring today's video.

第一步 感謝廣場空間對今天視頻的贊助。

Squarespace has beautiful award winning templates and then all in one platform, so you never have to install patches or upgrades ever.

Squarespace擁有漂亮的獲獎模板，然後全部在一個平臺上，所以你永遠都不用安裝補丁或升級。

They offer a unique and simple set up experience.

他們提供了獨特而簡單的設置體驗。

If you need a domain and 24 hour customer service with Squarespace, you could build any kind of website.

如果你需要一個域名和24小時客戶服務的Squarespace，你可以建立任何類型的網站。