You know something that has come to my attention lately in my therapy work has been miss attunement.

你知道最近在我的治療工作中，有一件事引起了我的注意，那就是錯過了調和。

So Miss Attunement is the experience of not being heard, seen or understood for who you are.

所以Miss Attunement是一種不被聽到、不被看到或不被理解的體驗，因為你是誰。

And according to my therapist, it's one of the most stressful experiences we can have.

據我的治療師說，這是我們最緊張的經歷之一。

Disappoint.

令人失望。

Yeah, but not surprised.

是的，但並不驚訝。

Obviously, our first experience of Miss Attunement is in childhood, which is always comes back to childhood, doesn't it?

很顯然，我們對勤奮小姐的第一次體驗是在童年，而童年總是要回到童年，不是嗎？

The Harvard Center on the Developing Child says Miss Attunement effects Children's brain architecture.

哈佛兒童發展中心說，小姐的注意力會影響兒童的大腦結構。

When a caregiver consistently a tunes to a baby's needs, Neural networks are built in the brain that support the development of communication and social skills.

當照顧者始終如一地滿足寶寶的需求時，大腦中就會建立起神經網絡，以支持溝通和社交技能的發展。

But when there's consistent miss attunement, a baby lives in a state of constant stress, creating significant emotional and psychological issues.

但如果持續錯過了調理，寶寶就會一直生活在緊張的狀態中，造成很大的情緒和心理問題。

Fun really makes you think about all the bad baby advice that's been prevalent for generations like Hey, let your baby cry until he or she or they self soothe.

有趣的是，你真的會想到所有糟糕的嬰兒建議，已經盛行了幾代人，如嘿，讓你的寶寶哭，直到他或她或他們自我安慰。

Sorry, entire generation of parenting books.

對不起，整整一代的育兒書。

You created a community of Children who grew up to be adults who stopped expressing their needs, rejected their needs and essentially shut down and disconnected from their needs because we learned boomers aren't safe and they've just abandoned and blame you every chance that they get disappointed but not surprised.

你創造了一個兒童社區，他們長大成人後不再表達他們的需求，拒絕他們的需求，並基本上關閉和斷開他們的需求，因為我們瞭解到潮人並不安全，他們只是拋棄並責怪你的每一個機會，他們感到失望，但並不驚訝。

What does this look like in adulthood?

成年後這是什麼樣子？

Well, are you someone who constantly fills up your schedule over, works yourself and gets overwhelmed and exhausted, but refuses to attune to your need for downtime?

那麼，你是否是一個不斷把日程表填滿的人，自己工作，讓自己不堪重負，精疲力竭，但卻拒絕調整自己的休息時間的需求？

Are you in social situations that make you uncomfortable?

你是否在社交場合讓你感到不舒服？

But you often refuse to attune to your need to stand up for yourself and leave.

但你常常拒絕適應自己的需要，站起來離開。

Do you pride yourself on needing as little as possible?

你是否為自己需要的東西越少越好而自豪？

Do you stay in toxic relationships, friendships or familial situations to the point that it's a detriment to yourself?

你是否會停留在有毒的人際關係、朋友關係或家庭環境中，以至於對自己造成傷害？

Do you feel empty, helpless, hopeless, stuck on scene and misunderstood?

你是否感到空虛、無助、無望、困在現場、被誤解？

Well, then, congrats.

好吧，那麼，恭喜你。

Join me in Miss Attunement.

和我一起參加小姐的調教。

Okay, so about this first meeting Yeah, I'm so excited to start this support group for people who are so unable to show up for themselves.

好了，所以關於這次的第一次會議 是的，我很興奮開始這個支持小組 誰是如此無法顯示自己的人。

Yeah, I should have seen that coming.

是啊，我早該想到的

The good news is all it takes to unravel.

好消息就是要全部解開。

This deeply embedded pattern is to consistently attuned to yourself.

這種深藏不露的模式，就是要始終如一地調適自己。

So this is where a re parenting work really comes in showing up for yourself, asking yourself what you need, learning that you can be seen and understood.

所以，這才是一個重新育兒工作真正的意義所在，展現自己，問自己需要什麼，學習自己可以被看到和理解。

It's really hard and annoying at first, but after you do it long enough that it starts to become like a habit and ingrained in your brain, you'll have no problem saying stuff like attention, everyone.

一開始真的很難，也很煩，但是當你做的時間足夠長，開始變得像一種習慣，並且在你的大腦中根深蒂固之後，你就會毫不猶豫的說出注意了，大家注意了這樣的話。

As you know, I love you all very much.

如你所知，我非常愛你們。

However, for the sign, it is now 9 p.m. And I need you to exit my home Good night Goodbye and good luck.

然而，對於標誌，現在是晚上9點，我需要你退出我的家 晚安，再見，祝你好運。

Get out now I'm Anaconda and thank you so much to square space for sponsoring today's episode.

現在就出去吧，我是蟒蛇，非常感謝方圓空間對今天節目的贊助。

Squarespace has an all in one platform to build a beautiful online presence and run your business, complete with marketing tools and analytics to have your online store be the best you could be.

Squarespace擁有一個一體化的平臺，可以建立一個美麗的在線存在，並運行您的業務，完整的營銷工具和分析，讓您的在線商店成為最好的。

For those of you who love to create audio content, you can use audio blocks, which allows you to embed audio on your site and tag the audio for iTunes.

對於那些喜歡創建音頻內容的人來說，你可以使用音頻塊，它允許你在你的網站上嵌入音頻併為iTunes標記音頻。

When your audio block is placed in a block, plus, you can have multiple contributors receive selective access to your sites.

當你的音頻區塊被放置在一個區塊中時，加，你可以讓多個貢獻者有選擇地訪問你的網站。

Website manager And don't worry, you own all the content that you put on the square space platform.

網站管理員 而且不用擔心，你擁有放在方塊空間平臺上的所有內容。

They offer one click data portability a squarespace dot com for a free trial.

他們提供一鍵式數據便攜a平方空間點com免費試用。

And whenever you're ready to launch, go to squarespace dot com slash anna to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain squarespace attuned to that.

而每當你準備啟動時，去squarespace點com斜槓anna，可以節省10%的折扣，你第一次購買網站或域名squarespace貼合，。