HOW ARE WE ALL DOING TODAY?

大家今天過得怎麼樣？

IF YOU HAVE BEEN WATCHING THE SLOW THE LAST FEW NIGHTS, IAN,

如果你最近幾晚都在看《慢》的話，伊安：

ONE OF OUR HEAD WRITERS WHO USUALLY JOINS US ON THE SHOW IS

我們的一位主編通常會和我們一起參加節目的是

NOT IN TODAY.

今天不在。

HE ATE SOME UNDERCOOKED SHRIM AND HAS FOOD POISONING.

他吃了一些未煮熟的肉絲，有食物中毒。

NOT SURE HOW THAT HAPPENS.

不知道怎麼發生的。

ONE OF OUR WRITERS IS FILLING IN.

我們的一個作家正在填補。

NATE.

NATE：

HOW YOU GOING DOING?

你怎麼樣了？

HE LOOKS SO FIRED UP TO BE HERE.

他看起來很興奮的在這裡。

>> GOOD.

>> 好的。

>> James: WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN UP TO.

>> 詹姆斯。你最近在做什麼。

>> BEING MY USUAL WILD SELF, YOU KNOW.

>> 做我平常的狂野的自己，你知道的。

THREW ON SOME ROCK AND ROLL RECORDS THIS WEEKEND, GOT A

扔在一些搖滾樂唱片這個週末，得到了一個。

SIXER OF BEER, BECAME A TOTAL STAMP TRAMP, YOU KNOW.

啤酒的SIXER，成為一個總的郵票旅行團，你知道的。

>> James: BECAME A WHAT?

>> 詹姆斯：成為一個什麼？

A STAMP TRAMP.

一個郵票旅行團。

>> James: I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN HEAR YOU.

>> 詹姆斯。我不知道我是否能聽到你的聲音。

YOU SAY YOU GOT A TRAMP STAMP?

你說你得到了一個AMP印章？

>> NO, A TRAMP STAMP IS A SUGGESTIVE TATTOO IN THE LOWER

>> 不，TRAMP印章是一種在下半身的暗示性紋身。

BACK.

返回。

WHAT I AM IS A STAMP TRAMP.

我是什麼人，是一個郵票旅行者。

>> James: I DON'T THINK ANYBODY HERE KNOWS WHAT A STAMP

>> 詹姆斯。我想這裡沒有人知道什麼是郵票。

TRAMP IS.

TRAMP是：

IS A STAMP TRAMP A THING?

是一個印章TRAMP一個東西？

>> OH, BELIEVE ME, IT IS, JAMES.

>> 哦，相信我，是的，詹姆斯。

I GET OUT MY CREDIT CARD, I GO TO USPS.com AND I ORDER A

我拿到我的信用卡後，我去USPS.com訂購了一張。

BUNCH OF STAMPS -- I'M TALKING A NAUGHTY AMOUNT OF STAMPS, IF YOU

一大堆郵票 -- 我說的是一大堆漂亮的郵票，如果你...

KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

知道我的意思。

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: BUT I DON'T.

（笑） >> 詹姆斯：但我沒有。

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

我不知道你在說什麼。

I DON'T THINK I WOULD EVER CALL ANY AMOUNT OF STAMPS "NAUGHTY."

我想我不會把任何數量的郵票稱為 "醜陋"。

>> WELL, OBVIOUSLY YOU >> WELL, OBVIOUSLY YOU HAVEN'T

>> 好吧，很明顯你 >> 好吧，很明顯你沒有

SEEN THE POSTAL SERVICE'S MORE ADULT STAMP SELECTION.

看到了郵政服務的更多成人郵票選擇。

>> James: I HAVE NOT.

>> 詹姆斯。我沒有。

I HAVEN'T SEEN A STAMP IN YEARS.

我已經好幾年沒看到郵票了。

>> I BOUGHT THIS STAMP.

>> 我買了這個印章。

THEY ARE PRETTY STEAMY.

他們是非常蒸汽。

I'M NOT SURE WE CAN EVEN SHOW IT ON TV, BUT I'LL TRY.

我不確定我們是否能在電視上播放，但我會努力的。

>> James: IT'S TOMATOES.

>> 詹姆斯。這是番茄。

>> JAMES, IT'S A BUNCH OF JUICY FRUIT AT SOME SORT OF NAKED

>> 詹姆斯，這是一堆果汁水果在某種程度上的裸露。

PARTY.

黨。

>> James: IT'S VEGETABLE-THEMED POSTAGE.

>> 詹姆斯。這是蔬菜主題的郵資。

>> I KNOW, IT'S PRETTY SHOCKING, I KNOW.

>> 我知道，這是非常令人震驚的，我知道。

BUT THIS IS THE KIND OF HARDCORE THING I'M INTO NOW, JAMES.

但這是那種硬核的東西 我現在，詹姆斯。

BECAUSE I'M A STAMP TRAMP.

因為我是個郵差。

>> James: I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SAY THIS, BUT I MISS IAN.

>> 詹姆斯。我從來沒有想過我會說這句話， 但我想念伊安。

( LAUGHTER ) I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON.

我不知道發生了什麼事。

>> I DIDN'T STOP THERE.

>> 我還沒說完呢。

NO.

編號：

I DIDN'T STOP THERE.

我沒有停止在那裡。

I GOT A WHOLE PACK OF THESE BOYS.

我買了一整包這些男孩。

>> James: THAT'S ARNOLD PALMER.

>> 那是阿諾德-帕爾默。

>> IT SURE IS.

>> 它肯定是。

AND THIS STAMP MAKES ME WANNA MIX SOME ICE TEA WITH LEMONADE,

這個印章讓我想把冰茶和檸檬汁混合在一起。

IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.

如果你知道我的意思，

>> James: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU MEAN.

>> 詹姆斯。我不知道你在說什麼。

>> THAT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE A PRUDE AND ME?

>> 那是因為你是個笨蛋而我呢？

I'M A GRADE-A STAMP TRAMP.

我是一個A級郵差。

I JUST DROPPED FIFTY BUCKS ON THESE SAUCY LITTLE STICKIES.

我剛剛在這些小棒子上扔了50塊錢。

>> James: SAUCY LITTLE STICKIES?

>> James:SAUCY LITTLE STICKIES？

WHAT?

什麼？

>> YES, THESE LUSCIOUS LITTLE LICKABLES.

>> 是的，這些可愛的小舌頭。

>> James: LICKABLES?

>> 詹姆斯。舔嘴脣？

NATE, IT SEEMS LIKE YOU'RE BUYING EXTRA STAMPS TO HELP THE

內特，看來你是在買額外的郵票來幫助他們。

UNITED STATES POSTAL SERVICE.

美國郵政服務。

THIS IS YOU JUST BEING A GOOD CITIZEN.

這是你只是做一個好公民。

>> OH, REALLY?

>> 哦，真的嗎？

WOULD A GOOD CITIZEN DO THIS?

一個好公民會這樣做嗎？

AAAHHH!

AAAHH!

, AHHH.

啊！

>> Jams: YEAH, GOOD PEOPLE LICK ENVELOPES.

>> 果醬是的，好人們都在舔信封。

MAYBE NOT LIKE THAT.

也許不是這樣的。

>> DON'T SHAME ME, JAMES.

>> 不要羞辱我，詹姆斯。

>> James: THAT'S NOT WHAT I HAVE TO MEAN.

>> 詹姆斯。這不是我必須要表達的意思。

>> Reggie: I HAVE TO AGREE WITH NATE, THOSE ARE SOME TRAMPY

>> 雷吉：我不得不同意內特的觀點，這些都是一些TRAMPY。

LITTLE STAMPIES.

小郵票。

>> James: NOT YOU AS WELL, REGGIE.

>> 詹姆斯。不是你，以及，REGGIE。

>> BASICALLY, JAMES, THESE ARE TOASTY LITTLE TOASTIES.

>> 基本上，詹姆斯，這些都是小烤餅。

>> James: OKAY, TOASTY TOASTIES!

>> 詹姆斯。好吧，烤麵包！

>> THEY'RE SASSY LITTLE SQUAREYS.

>> 他們是狡猾的小方塊。

>> James: STOP.

>> 詹姆斯。停止。

I ALSO CALL THEM ( BLEEP ) STAMPS.

我也叫他們（嗶嗶）郵票。

>> James: I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING.

>> 詹姆斯。我知道你在做什麼。

YOU'RE BUYING STAMPS, THAT IS A TOTALLY NORMAL, WHOLESOME THING.

你買郵票，那是很正常的，很好的事情。

>> SURE, SURE.

>> 當然，當然。

I GUESS BUYING STAMPS IS A GREAT WAY, TO YOU KNOW, SUPPORT THE

我想，買郵票是一個很好的方式，你知道，支持的

POSTAL SERVICE AND, YES, THE POSTAL SERVICE PLAYS A HUGE ROLE

郵政服務，是的，郵政服務發揮了巨大的作用。

IN PROCESSING VOTE BY MAIL BALLOTS AND, OF COURSE, I'M

在處理郵寄投票，當然，我是

WORRIED THAT THE CURRENT ADMINISTRATION IS UNDERMINING

擔心現任政府正在破壞

THE POST OFFICE IN AN ATTEMPT TO SUPPRESS THE VOTE IN THE

郵政署企圖壓制選舉投票

UPCOMING ELECTION.

即將舉行的選舉。

>> James: YES, THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!

>> 詹姆斯。是的，這就是我說的！

>> BUT THAT IS NOT WHY I BUY STAMPS, JAMES.

>> 但這不是我買郵票的原因，詹姆斯。

I DO IT BECAUSE I HAVE TO.

我這樣做是因為我必須這樣做。

I DO IT BECAUSE I'M A SICK LITTLE BISCUIT!

我這樣做是因為我是一個生病的小BISCUIT！

I DO IT BECAUSE I AM A TRAMP FOR THE STAMP!

我這樣做是因為我是一個郵票的試驗品！

READ IT AND WEEP, JAMES!

讀了它就哭吧，詹姆斯！

( LAUGHTER ) WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

（笑）我們將很快回來。

YOU GET IT?

你明白了嗎？

BECAUSE -- >> James: NO, WE ALL GET IT.

因為 -- >> 詹姆斯：不，我們都明白了。

BACK HAS TWO MEANINGS HERE.

背部在這裡有兩個意思。

>> James: I UNDERSTAND.

>> 詹姆斯。我明白了。

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

我們馬上回來。

>> IT'S A HOMONYM.

>> 這是一個HOMONYM。

>> James: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MAYA RUDOLPH AND FRED

>> James:我們馬上回來，瑪雅-魯道夫和弗雷德會來的

ARMISEN, EVERYBODY!

阿米森，所有人！