from his multiple Comedy Specials on Comedy Central.

從他在喜劇中心的多個喜劇特輯。

He's got a new album out.

他出了一張新專輯

That is, animated thing I want talk to him about.

就是說，我想跟他談的動畫事情。

Please welcome my friend, Kyle Kinane.

請歡迎我的朋友，凱爾-基納恩。

Kyle, we have you?

凱爾，我們有你嗎？

What's up, buddy?

怎麼了，夥計？

Thank you for being here.

謝謝你來這裡。

Well, not here anymore.

好了，不在這裡了。

We used to be neighbors and then you just moved to Portland.

我們曾經是鄰居，然後你搬到了波特蘭。

Yeah. You saw me posted up in front of the U-Haul

是啊，你看到我在U-Haul的前面貼了一張紙。你看到我被貼在U-Haul前面了嗎？

the other day. Yeah.

有一天。對啊

I didn't like California's up here.

我不喜歡加州的這裡。

So I brought a lot of flannel, I brought axe.

所以我帶了很多法蘭絨，我帶了斧頭。

Just tryna fit in with Portland.

只是想融入波特蘭

I kept my face. Yeah.

我保持著我的臉。對啊

I was gonna wear it and then I was wearing it for like,

我本來要穿它，然後我穿了一樣。

a half hour and I lost enthusiasm for the bit.

半個小時，我對這一點失去了熱情。

It is weird. What are you telling people?

這很奇怪。你在跟別人說什麼？

Cause the neighbors are asking like, "What do you do?"

因為鄰居們都在問："你是做什麼的？"

And it's weird to be like, "I'm a comedian.

而且很奇怪，就像 "我是個喜劇演員"。

"I moved from the Entertainment Capital to here."

"我從娛樂之都搬到了這裡。"

I don't ever tell anybody I'm a comedian.

我從來沒有告訴任何人我是一個喜劇演員。

What do you say?

你說什麼？

I never want people to know that.

我從來不想讓別人知道這些。

Cause then the expectations on.

原因那麼期望上。

I just wanna be like, "Hey, that guy's pretty fun."

我只是想說，"嘿，這傢伙很有趣。"

And then cause if people know you're a comedian

然後，因為如果人們知道你是一個喜劇演員

and you're not fun, they're like, "This guy sucks."

而你不好玩，他們就會說："這傢伙太差勁了。"

That guy with a super pack is really fun.

那個帶著超級揹包的傢伙真的很有趣。

Yeah. I'm just kind of the guy like,

是的，我只是那種喜歡的人。

I'm just watering the lawn up here.

我只是在這裡澆灌草坪。

Nobody knows anything about me. I've met the neighbors.

沒有人知道我的任何事情。我已經見過了鄰居。

The mailman's already seen me nude once, that was a mishap.

郵差已經看過我一次裸體了，那是個意外。

How's that happened?

怎麼會這樣？

Well, I'm not used to living on the ground floor,

好吧，我不習慣住在一樓。

you know, you live in an apartment,

你知道，你住在一個公寓。

you're on the second floor and that's just nudity

你在二樓，這只是赤裸裸的東西

all the time on the second floor.

一直在二樓。

Cause nobody's looking, nobody's cares.

因為沒有人看，沒有人關心。

That's too much. Vantage point.

這也太誇張了吧。優勢點。

Here, I'm on the first floor forgetting

在這裡，我在一樓，忘了。

and living my life regular.

和生活我的生活規律。

And I thought, the laundry's in the garage.

我想，洗衣房在車庫裡。

And there's windows on the garage door.

而且車庫門上有窗戶。

I haven't seen that. Right?

我還沒看到。對吧？

That's not city life, windows on a garage door?

這不是城市生活，車庫門上的窗戶？

Get out of here.

快離開這裡

Right. Well that's Portland, where everyone like,

好吧，那是波特蘭那是波特蘭，大家都喜歡的地方。

has a roommate, that lives in the garage.

有一個室友，住在車庫裡。

Yeah.

是啊。

Well I was taking off all my clothes to put them into wash,

我把所有的衣服都脫下來洗。

in the garage, you know, you're doing your laundry

在車庫裡，你知道，你正在做你的衣服

and then you get to that point like, well,

然後你到了那個點，就像，好。

what if all my clothes are clean at once?

如果我的衣服一下子都乾淨了怎麼辦？

Oh yeah. I've been tempted to do that.

哦，是啊，我一直想這麼做。我一直想這樣做。

But then, that's on the third floor.

不過，那是在三樓。

So I have to like walk down shirtless.

所以，我必須像走下來的襯衫。

I'm gonna be that guy in the building,

我要成為大樓裡的那個人。

but that doesn't get thought.

但這並沒有得到思考。

Now I'm in a house.

現在我在一個房子裡。

And I can finally achieve that

而我終於可以實現這一點

every single piece of clothing,

每一件衣服。

clean at the same time feeling.

同時乾淨的感覺。

So I disrobe. Yeah.

所以我脫了衣服。對啊

Dunk the clothes, I figured I got three seconds window

我想我有三秒鐘的時間，把衣服灌進去

just to dunk the clothes, get back in the house.

只是為了浸泡衣服，回到家裡。

That's the same amount of time

那是同樣的時間

that the mailman is walking up the driveway.

郵差正走在車道上。

And I just, I looked at him

我只是，我看著他

and he was wearing like some Oakley blades.

他穿著像一些奧克利刀片。

So I'm sure his eyes saw it, but I couldn't judge it.

所以我肯定他的眼睛看到了，但我無法判斷。

He kept a straight enough look.

他保持著足夠的直視。

But, now is like the first week we were here.

但是，現在就像我們來這裡的第一個星期。

So I dunno nothing.

所以我什麼都不知道。

You got walked in by the cool mailman

你被酷酷的郵差走進來了

who got into his lifted mail truck.

誰上了他的升降式郵車。

Rolling coal out of the van.

從貨車裡滾出煤來。

Did it take you a lot for you to move? I mean.

你花了很多時間來搬家嗎？我是說...

First off, we didn't hire movers and I don't know why.

首先，我們沒有請搬家公司，我也不知道為什麼。

I could have afforded that.

我可以負擔得起的。

I just like, we'll do it ourselves.

我只是喜歡，我們會自己做。

You know? You doing well.

你知道嗎？你做得很好。

Stupidest thing I've ever done in my life.

我這輩子做過的最愚蠢的事。

You pack so much stuff that you think you're gonna need.

你帶了這麼多東西，你認為你會需要。

And then after you transport it, thousands of miles

然後你把它運走之後，千里迢迢的。

and you're like, "Oh, I never needed this."

你就像，"哦，我從來不需要這個。"

I didn't need this VHS collection of happy days.

我不需要這個收集快樂時光的VHS。

I have no less than

我有不少於

200 different half full hotel moisturizers.

200種不同的半全酒店保溼劑。

The cheapest moisturizer, it's always lemon scented.

最便宜的保溼霜，總是檸檬味的。

Do you wanna smell like lemon?

你想聞到檸檬的味道嗎？

Smell like lemon and just be slick

聞起來像檸檬，只是光滑的

for a good part of your day.

在你一天中的大部分時間裡。

I have so many of those.

我有很多這樣的。

I think it's just white motor oil.

我想這只是白機油。

There's no way, it never absorbs your skin.

沒辦法，它永遠不會吸收你的皮膚。

Your skin is like, " I don't want that."

你的皮膚就像，"我不想要這個"

All the antibodies and your body is like,

所有的抗體和你的身體是一樣的。

"This shouldn't be in me."

"這不應該在我身上。"

Why does this keep staining my shirts?

為什麼這東西老是弄髒我的襯衫？

This can't be good for my skin.

這對我的皮膚不好。

Why is this eating away at fabric?

為什麼會蠶食布料？

If someone just has a lighter in the room,

如果有人只是在房間裡有一個打火機。

I instantly busted the flames.

我瞬間破除了火焰。

You smell like cotton balls with those ready to

你聞起來就像棉花球一樣

start campfires when you're going camping.

當你要去露營的時候，開始營火。

Yeah.

是啊。

I have three different lip balms just on my desk.

我的辦公桌上就有三種不同的脣膏。

All packed. This is great.

全部打包。這是偉大的。

This is all packed. Unnecessary.

這都是包裝好的。沒必要。

I got, I'm ready.

我知道了，我準備好了。

I've got, like I said, I got an axe.

我有，就像我說的，我有一把斧子。

Did you get a gun?

你有槍嗎？

Cause it's the first time I've thought like,

因為這是我第一次有這樣的想法。

"I totally am against gun control. Absolutely.

"我完全反對槍支管制。絕對反對。

"They should be checked."

"他們應該被檢查。"

But this is the first time where

但這是第一次

it feels like a good purchase.

感覺是一次不錯的購買。

It feels like a good purchase.

感覺是一次不錯的購買。

Yeah. I bought a gun.

是的，我買了一把槍

I bought a gun because you ever look at

我買槍是因為你曾經看過

the people in line at the gun store, they're getting guns.

在槍店排隊的人， 他們得到的槍。

That's why I got a gun.

這就是為什麼我有一把槍。

Yeah.

是啊。

It was muffin top creep and a Punisher t-shirt.

那是鬆糕上衣和懲罰者T恤。

It's gonna be armed and I'll lose.

它會被武裝起來，我會輸的。

I'm gonna lose the civil war.

我將會輸掉這場內戰

But at least I wanna lose with some effort. You know?

但至少我想努力地輸掉。你知道嗎？

It would make me feel more comfortable

這讓我感覺更舒服

if the guys buying guns were a little more in shape.

如果買槍的人身材再好一點。

Because they would at least try to do the fist fight before.

因為他們至少會嘗試著去做之前的拳腳功夫。

But this, the line is like,

但這，行是像。

well that guy's gonna go immediately for the gun,

好了，那個傢伙的會去 立即為槍。

so he doesn't have to do stairs.

這樣他就不用走樓梯了。

Yeah. You're just Indiana Jones

是啊，你就是印第安納瓊斯你只是印第安納瓊斯

with the guy with the Symitar in the marketplace.

和市場上那個拿著Symitar的傢伙。

He's gonna use it.

他要用它。

Like shoot this guy like, "Well, come on man.

就像拍這個傢伙一樣，"嗯，來吧，夥計。

"How about a little fair fight?"

"來點公平競爭如何？"

It starts with a roast battle. Yeah.

它開始於一場烤肉大戰。對啊

I mean, that's what we can bring to the table.

我的意思是，這就是我們能帶來的東西。

You should be at roast battle.

你應該去參加烤肉戰。

You should be able to take it.

你應該能接受。

And there should be some sort of

而且應該有某種

physical agility tests, that you should take.

體能敏捷測試，你應該參加。

To be like, "You could try to throw one punch at least

要像 "你至少可以試著打一拳

"before you go to the gun"

"在你拿槍之前"

Throwing stars. That's nice.

扔星星。這很好。

But you are right.

但你是對的。

And that, it's the people that are buying guns.

而這，就是買槍的人。

Well then, we want one. We're not gonna be like,

那麼，我們想要一個。我們不會像，

"I have a sign. I'm gonna shame you on line."

"我有一個標誌。我要在網上羞辱你。"

Like that doesn't win.

像這樣不贏。

There are gonna be like, in the next 18 months,

有會是這樣的，在接下來的18個月。

I'm sure there's gonna be so many like different,

我相信會有這麼多喜歡不同。

I don't know like improve advisers and TV writers

我不知道像提高顧問和電視編劇的水準

with accidental bullet wounds. Yeah.

與意外的彈傷。是啊 Yeah.

I wrote on Carolina, the city.

我寫的是卡羅萊納，這個城市。

And now I have a small militia operating out of Burbank.

現在我有一個小規模的民兵組織在伯班克活動。

Oh my God. That went right through my air force one.

哦，我的上帝。這直接穿過我的空軍一號。

I can't believe it.

我真不敢相信

A break through. My new new balances.

一個突破。我新的新的餘額。

It's a weird time now.

現在是個奇怪的時代。

You'd think it would be easy to choose a side,

你會覺得選邊站很容易。

cause one of the sides has Nazis.

因為其中一方有納粹。

Yeah.

是啊。

Remember those, those are back.

記得那些，那些又回來了。

You'd think you'd be like,

你以為你會像。

"Well, even if they got other stuff,

"好吧，就算他們有其他的東西。

"that's like me, the Nazi thing kind of canceled."

"這就像我一樣，納粹的事情那種取消。"

Well, but free ice cream every other Tuesday.

好吧，但每隔一週的週二都有免費的冰激凌。

Hold on I love ice cream.

等一下，我喜歡冰淇淋。

Wait a minute. All right.

等待一分鐘。好吧，我知道了

Thought you guys have Nazis.

還以為你們有納粹呢。

Man, even if they checked every box,

男人，即使他們檢查每一個盒子。

Nazis are still on there, like I got to go the other guys.

納粹還在那裡，就像我得去其他人。

It's the cartoon version.

是卡通版的。

It's the first question on, who wants to be a millionaire?

這是第一個問題，誰想成為百萬富翁？

Like that's the obvious joke answer, not the one with Nazis.

就像那是明顯的笑話答案，而不是有納粹的那個。

I already look like I'm in some sort of bunker.

我看起來已經像在某種地堡裡了。

Like I've just peered up the blinds.

就像我剛剛窺視了百葉窗。

Yeah.

是啊。

They're coming, man.

他們來了，夥計。

It's the mailman.

是郵差。

There's no way you shouldn't have shown up that time.

那個時候你不可能不出現的。

He's in on it.

他也有份

Well, that's what's funny about the mailman is that,

嗯，這就是郵差的有趣之處，就是。

he came back the next day and I was out watering the lawn

第二天，他回來了，我在外面澆灌草坪

and I had like a joke seventies outfit from a party.

我有像一個笑話七十年代的裝備 從黨。

But I had very limited clothing up here,

但我在這裡的衣服非常有限。

when we were living here over the summer.

當我們住在這裡的夏天。

So I was just in cutoff Jean shorts

所以，我只是在剪裁牛仔短褲。

and like a red mesh tank top.

和喜歡的紅色網狀背心。

And I just looked like Philip Seymour Hoffman character

我看起來就像菲利普-西摩-霍夫曼的角色。

from boogie nights, that I'm out there watering the lawn.

我在外面給草坪澆水。

And he comes rolling up and like,

而他來滾滾而來，喜歡。

all right, now I look like I'm just tryna

好吧，現在我看起來像我只是試著去。

court this spell up.

法院這個拼起來。

Like, Ooh.

像，哦。

Right. Like the housewife that's like,

好吧，就像家庭主婦一樣就像家庭主婦一樣。

"Oh, whoops, you caught me."

"哦，哎呀，被你發現了。"

Hey there postman.

嘿，郵差。

In nice kiddies.

在好孩子。

What was the idea behind Portland?

波特蘭背後的想法是什麼？

Because of all the cities,

因為所有的城市。

I mean a lot of people make the move to Austin.

我是說很多人都會搬到奧斯汀來住

Not many people are going from LA,

從洛杉磯去的人不多。

which is not doing great right now,

現在做的不是很好。

to Portland, which is at least media wise not going great.

到波特蘭，這至少是媒體上的不走大。

Oh, well, I mean, we're in the burbs.

哦，好吧，我的意思是，我們在郊區。

So, and I like the burbs. I grew up in the burbs.

所以，我喜歡郊區。我是在郊區長大的

And when you grow up in the burbs,

而當你在郊區長大時，

you feel like you're trapped

你覺得你被困住了

and like nothing good ever came out of there.

就像沒有什麼好東西從那裡出來一樣。

But then I left and I lived my life

但後來我離開了，我過著我的生活

and now I'm back in the burbs.

現在我回到了郊區。

I'm like, "Oh, I dig this place."

我想，"哦，我挖這個地方。"

People respect a four-way stop sign.

人們尊重四通八達的停車標誌。

There's good grocery stores.

有好的雜貨店。

I got a grocery store, the solid hot bar.

我有一個雜貨店，固體熱吧。

How do you feel about the hot bar Moses?

你覺得熱巴摩西怎麼樣？

I feel great until they start like,

我感覺很好，直到他們開始喜歡。

"We have orange chicken."

"我們有橘子雞。"

I am like, "I don't think Von's

我想："我不認為馮的。

"knows what they're doing with orange chicken."

"知道他們在用橘子雞做什麼"

I really, I would think anybody can do orange chicken.

我真的會覺得誰都能做橙子雞。

I would, question them when they're like,

我會，詢問他們，當他們像。

"Oh, question Von's."

"哦，馮的問題。"

And I'm like, "This is goat cheese."

我想，"這是山羊奶酪。"

Like you just found that cheese.

就像你剛找到那塊奶酪。

Yeah.

是啊。

You have no idea that's goat cheese

你不知道那是山羊奶酪嗎？

That's just bad mozzarella.

這只是壞馬蘇裡拉奶酪。

But never once have I eaten orange chicken

但我從來沒有吃過橘子雞

and ever gotten a hint of what I thought was chicken in it.

並曾經得到過一絲我以為是雞肉的味道。

Oh yeah, right?

哦，是嗎？

Cause it's all. Yeah. It's all the butter.

因為都是對，都是黃油

It's just candy. It's like movie candy.

這只是糖果。就像電影裡的糖果。

Made out of poultry and that's not a complaint.

用家禽做的，這不是抱怨。

That's not a complaint. It's not a complaint.

這不是一個投訴。這不是一個投訴。

So you think it's gonna change your point of view at all?

所以你覺得這能改變你的觀點嗎？

Because a lot of standup, I mean, you're always on the edge.

因為很多站立，我的意思是，你總是在邊緣。

You're not living in great circumstances.

你的生活環境不是很好。