(cat meows)

（貓叫聲）

(phone rings)

（電話鈴聲）

- Who's Facetiming me?

- 誰在給我打臉？

Jack?

傑克？

- Yo, what up, man?

- 喲，怎麼了，夥計？

- Hey, what's up?

- 嘿，怎麼了？

- Dude, how crazy is this?

- 夥計，這有多瘋狂？

We've never Facetimed before.

我們從來沒有Facetimed之前。

- Yeah, I know,

- 是的，我知道。

pretty crazy.

很瘋狂。

- Man, it's like, I can see you, you can see me,

- 夥計，這就像，我可以看到你，你可以看到我。

how fun is this?

這有什麼好玩的？

- Yeah, is there something like,

- 是啊，有沒有類似的東西。

you could have many texted or emailed or snapped or

你可以有許多簡訊或電子郵件或拍攝或。

even handwritten letter?

哪怕是一封手寫的信？

- Nah, that's boring,

- 不，那很無聊。

welcome to the future, baby.

歡迎來到未來，寶貝。

It's like we're just having a conversation

就像我們只是在對話一樣。

in the same room, but we're not in the same room.

在同一個房間，但我們不在同一個房間。

- Zack, you know what Facetime's for, right?

- Zack，你知道Facetime是幹什麼的吧？

It's for like, if you have a long distance relationship,

這是為喜歡，如果你有一個長期的關係。

you can't make an interview.

你不能做一個採訪。

- I don't see why it can't just be

- 我不明白為什麼它不能是

for two dudes that just want to see each other

對於兩個帥哥，只是想看到對方。

and say what's up, playa?

並說什麼，playa？

Dude, I just wanted to see your face,

夥計，我只是想看看你的臉。

is that so weird?

有那麼奇怪嗎？

(mellow music)

(悠揚的音樂)

- Is that enough?

- 夠嗎？

- Yeah, no, that was cool,

- 是啊，不，那是很酷。

uh, why are you being so weird, man?

呃，你為什麼要這麼奇怪，夥計？

- I gotta go over here, man.

- 我得在這裡，男人。

I'm kinda busy.

我有點忙。

- Well, what are you doing?

- 那麼，你在做什麼？

- Stuff.

- 東西。

- Dude, are you pooping?

- 老兄，你在拉屎嗎？

- No.

- 不知道

- Come on, man,

- 來吧，夥計。

who answers a Facetime while they're taking a crap?

誰會在拉屎的時候接聽Facetime？

- Dude, you Facetimed me,

- 老兄，你用Facetimed我。

what do you want me to do?

你想讓我做什麼？

- Who answers a Facetime when they're pooping?

- 誰會在拉屎的時候接聽Facetime？

- I always pick up Facetimes,

- 我總是拿起Facetimes。

that's my thing.

這是我的事。

- Come on, man,

- 來吧，夥計。

don't act like I'm the weird one.

不要像我是一個奇怪的人。

If you're doing something private,

如果你在做一些私事。

you shouldn't answer a Facetime.

你不應該接聽Facetime。

Also, hurry up, I gotta go.

還有，快點，我得走了。

- Dude!

- 老兄！

(upbeat electronic music)

(歡快的電子音樂)