Today, I am finally going to play the most requested game of all time.

我終於要來玩...

I am finally going to play...

大家瘋狂敲碗...

... the most requested game...

的遊戲...

... of all time.

我特別愛其中一款的遊戲名稱...

One of my...

不只造就今天的我...

... personal favourite video game titles...

...也變成我的信仰

That jid not just shape who I am...

沒錯! 我就是在說這款

That did not just shape who I am, but what I believe in.

“企鵝”

... but what I believe in.

“俱樂部”（CLUB PENGUIN）

I'm talking, of course...

“企鵝俱樂部” 即將關閉

About CLUB PENGUIN (penguin club is shit btw)

不要RRRRRR

... penguin!

不要RRRRRRR

(dramatic music with strings and drums)

不!!!!! ノಠ_ಠノ

(screams) No!

不！（掩面）

(screams) No!

我最愛的遊戲啊.....

(screams) No!

“企鵝俱樂部” 遊戲將關閉於...

No!

3月29日

My favourite game of all...

༼ ༎ຶ ෴ ༎ຶ༽

... time.

這一切都是...

Club Penguin game on desktop, mobile devices will shut down...

假的！

March 29.

我拒絕...

(dramatic music with strings and drums)

接受這個

This can't...

川普當選總統

... be happening.

沒關係！

I refuse to accept this.

“企鵝俱樂部” 即將關閉?!

... to accept this.

我要說...

Trump is president. (Felix, you're in UK)

我要說 NO!!! 〴⋋_⋌〵

Fine...

是時候要停止了！

Club penguin shutting down.

希拉蕊是垃圾 OK?

I say...

我懂 川普贏了

... I say No!

希拉蕊就是坨屎

It's time to stop.

但這個?!

Hillary Clinton was garbage.

這...

Okay, I get it. Trump won.

...給我一個好理由...

Hillary was shit

... 為了這...

But this?!

... 怎麼發生的

This...

甚麼也沒有!

... tell me one good reason...

你什麼也沒有!

... for this...

一定還有一絲希望...

To happen

我一定可以阻止這一切...

There's nothing!

...用我的影響力去阻止這一切

You got nothing!

部分的鄉民知道 這裡是“企鵝俱樂部的”舊辦公室

There must be something that can be done.

伺服器房間在那 但鎖住了進不去

There must be one thing, that I can do...

那邊就是伺服器房 真心不騙

... to use my influence to stop this.

我知道有人會覺得我在莊孝維

As some of you know, I am right now at Club Penguin's old office.

那邊就是“企鵝俱樂部”的伺服器

The server room out there, which is locked by the way, I can't enter it

我這有最棒的網速

That server room, I'm not joking, I know it seems like I'm joking.

最屌DER~ മ◡മ

That server room, is running the Club Penguin servers

基本上我掌握了“企鵝俱樂部”的最後一條生命線

I... I got amazing fucking internet here

我不會讓一些543的主意...

It's the fucking best

關閉我最愛的遊戲

I basically have the last life line of Club Penguin in my hands

“企鵝俱樂部”將會...

and am not gonna let some stupid idea stop my favorite game of all time

活下去... ಠ╭╮ಠ

And I'm not gonna let some stupid idea

讓我們來看看現況

And I'm not gonna let some stupid idea

“企鵝俱樂部”有大量的點閱率

Stop my favorite game of all time

但這都還不夠

Club Penguin will... live

我要你們現在立馬

club penguin will live

去 玩 “企 鵝 俱 樂 部”

[Accurate Subtitles: I got tired, bye. suffer from the last subtitles. . . . . . . . . .

給他們一點顏色瞧瞧...

Let's look at the stats-.

讓他們知道“Bros”的不是混假的

Lets look at the stat

我們需要抗議

Club Penguin got plenty of page visits

他無法拆散我們

but we need more, I want all of y'all

“企鵝俱樂部” 無法拆散我們！

to play Club Penguin!

他無法拆散我們 “企鵝俱樂部” 無法拆散我們！

Show them the power of the Bros!

跟者我唸一遍

Show them what we can do!

“企鵝俱樂部” 無法拆散我們

We need to protest against this. He will

“企鵝俱樂部” 無法拆散我們

not divide us!

總統也無能為力

Club Penguin will not divide us

難道我們受的折磨還不夠多嗎？

He will not divide us. Club penguin will not

難道我們受的折磨還不夠多嗎??!?!?!?!

divide us, say it with me

是時候了... 是時候... 該創一個新的帳號了...

Club Penguin will not divide us!

“企鵝俱樂部” 是給兒童玩的第一名虛擬遊戲

Club Penguin will not divide us. Not my president!

你怎麼忍心從人們身邊奪走它

Haven't we suffered enough

你怎麼能如此殘忍...

Haven't we suffered enough

我最後創的角色爆炸了 ಥ_ಥ

It's time. It's time to make another account

“企鵝俱樂部 將於 2017年3月29日關閉伺服器”

Club Penguin is the number one virtual world

我們怎麼還在這裡

for kids

就為了受苦？

how can you take that away from people

每（嗝）個夜晚... 我都能感受到我的“企鵝俱樂部”

how can you just chew it up and spit it out

*心如刀割*

My last character got blown up

在我的雙臂

Club Penguin's virtual world will be

在我的指間

closing march in 27.. 29th

這還不夠

then why are we still here,

我們會結束這一切

Just to suffer?

為了 “企鵝俱樂部” ...

Every night I can feel my Club Penguin

我們需要進入伺服器房

(METAL GEAR SOLID V music)

這就是伺服器房

In my arm

鎖住了！

In my fingers

但我有門禁卡

(more METAL GEAR SOLID V music)

可以用

this is not enough

這是唯一鎖住的房間

we will end this. For Club Penguin!

快阿！ “企鵝俱樂部”

For Club Penguin.

快R

(alternate universe 9 11)

我果我能進去 我就能阻止這一切

*door opens*

阻止這場悲劇 然後這些就會像是夢一樣消逝

I need to get into the server room

你知道... 要怎麼... 闖空門嗎？...

This is the server room

電影裡面都這樣教

It's locked

這就只有那個小東西耶

It's locked

Brad: 就只有那道鎖而已

but I have the key card

我們需要成功

but I have the key card

Brad: 嗯... 我覺得你如果有那種小扁鑽

it works

嗯？

It's the only room they locked

Brad: 你可以伸進去那裡 把那道鎖推開

It's the only room they locked

（飛奔）

Come on Club Penguin

Brad: 他去叨位??!! ( ⁰д⁰)

C'mon

這樣犯法嗎？

If I can get in here, I can stop it. I can stop this

Brad: 差不多算是了（＾ｖ＾）

horrible thing and then it will all just be a dream

我們是否不應該拍下去?!

Do you know how to like... break into the... now?

這是為了更美好的未來

they always use the card in movies

喔! Brad: 他做到了! Pewds: 太簡單了!天啊!

It's literally just that one thing!

這道門後的一切...

So it's just that one lock there

即將改變...

To make it in here

這世界... (꒪⌓꒪)

Well, I think if you had a little

我該開嗎? Brad:廢話

flathead screwdriver, you can jimmy it in

歐... 買... 尬...

and push this thing open

歐買尬... 它比我想像中的還要美麗...

* Pewdiepie = Usain bolt confirmed*

這是“企鵝俱樂部”的心臟

Where did he go?

而他正在滴著血... ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

Is this illegal?

我想它會這樣是因為...

Almost definitely. Should we not be filming this?

( ͡ಠ ʖ̯ ͡ಠ)

It's for the greatest good.

夭壽喔

Oh! Brad: He's done it! Pewds: It was so easy! Oh mah gawd!

（監視器發現）

Oh my god!

拍謝拉 （尷尬笑）

Ohhhh.

“我們被駭了”

*Pewds thanks the skies*

“下場可能會很慘”

What's inside this door...

“偵測臉部辨識”

It's gonna change... the world.

夭～壽～喔～ 那是 Jason Bourne

Should I open? Brad: Yea

乾 怎麼辦?!

Ohmagad

我...

It's more beautiful than I ever imagined (Wow)

拍謝內

This is Club Penguin's heart, and

我們要閃了

it's bleeding

乾-幹!

Think there's a reason they ke-

我不想被趕走...

Oh shit. *Dun* *laughs* Sorry

我真的不想再被趕走一次了... （大笑）

We've just been hacked, it could be worse than Snowden

幹...XD

facial recognition got a hit

你現在要怎麼拯救“企鵝俱樂部”?

Jesus Christ thats Jason Bourne

你要怎麼拯救“企鵝俱樂部”...?

What are we doing.. I... *laugh* sorry

從監獄嗎？ (ಡ艸ಡ)

We're gonna go *laughs*

（崩潰笑）

F-fuck

踏馬的

I don't want to get evicted, I really don't want to get evicted

一定有其他方法 Brad

*laughs* Fuck

你知道... 當事情變得困難...

(off screen) How are you gonna save Club Penguin now? *laughs*

看似...

How are you gonna save Club Penguin from JAIL? *laughs*

看似已無後路...

There must be another way Brad

然後你放棄希望...

You know when things get hard

你祈禱...

there's no other... when there seems like

”我必須祈禱... 為了“企鵝俱樂部” 的守護者“

there's no way out and you lose hope

”那尋覓已久的...“

You pray *Holy Music*

”來保護... ㄟ... 呃...“

I must pray to the protector of penguins

”對企鵝最大的威脅是什麼?“

the one that seeks to protect the earth

”哦~ 沒錯~ 氣候變遷...“

What's the biggest threat to penguins

”我必須祈禱“

oh that's right climate change

”為了 Al Gore（美國前副總統）“

I'm must pray

”我們需要你...“

to Al Gore

”再一次地...“

we need you once again join us

”加入我們...“

Al Gore, save the Penguins save Club Penguin

”Al Gore... 救救那些企鵝“

protect this server when I go to jail *laughs*

”救救 企鵝俱樂部“

so say we in Al Gore's name: Amen

”在我去吃牢飯後... 為我守護此服服器...“

*Blast*

”讓我們以Al Gore 之名... “

*Dramatic Music* (ff7 Sephiroth theme)

”阿們！“

No, not you

不是吧...

Ainsley: Hahamwhahaha

不!!! (꒪ȏ꒪;)

Ainsley, are you the reason Club Penguin is dying?

洗粒...

yes, it is me, I have infected the club penguin servers

*Ainsley出現* ”啊哈哈哈哈哇哈哈“

Long I have awaited for this day

”啊哈哈哈哈哇哈哈“

And now, finally, my dream has been realized

”啊哈哈哈哈哇哈... “

Club Penguin shall fall

Ainsley...

How could you do this?

難道這一切都是你在背後搞鬼?!

haha i used you pewdiepie you swedish javla helvette

”耶死！就是我... 我對“企鵝俱樂部”的伺服器動了點手腳“

I though you loved me!

”我等這一天好久了“

How could I love that which is unlovable.

”然而現在... “

You were my puppet you stupid boy

”終於啊...“

You were my brother Ainsley

”我的美夢終於成真了！“

You were supposed to bring balance to the corporate...

”企鵝俱樂部...“

*zap* *Groans*

“必 須"

Unlimited power

”倒 閉"

*Dramatic Music* *Electric sounds* *Felix groans*

你怎麼可以醬紙對我... ༼☯﹏☯༽

*Laughs*

“阿哈哈哈哇哈哈 哈哈”

*Coughs* You may have killed me Ainsley, b-*coughs* but you will not get past Al Gore

“我利用你 Pewdiepie”

He was meant to be president... all along

“你這瑞典小俗辣”

(and here... felix dies)

我以為你對我的愛是真的 (இ﹏இ`｡)

*Dramatic Music*

”我怎麼有辦法愛你這種沒人愛的屁孩？“