字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV. The place to be to create a business and life you love. Got a question for you today. Have you ever felt like you have a ton of potential inside, but you’re not able to fully actualize it out into the world? My next guest says that the key to really unleashing your power, your voice, and your self respect lies in one simple decision that you can make right now. We are about to talk with one of my favorite authors of all time, Mr. Steven Pressfield, about his new book called Turning Pro. I absolutely love it, I think that every human being on the planet should read it, and let’s talk to him right now and learn why... Alright everyone, welcome. I am here with, as I told you, the amazing author of Turning Pro, Mr. Steven Pressfield. And as you’ll notice, my book cover is like all cranked out. Steven, I’ve had this book at the beach, I can’t even tell you how many people have stole it from me, there’s like highlights, there’s sand in this book. Ah, great. I absolutely love it. So I’ve built up this book which, again, no hype, everyone on the planet should read this. Let’s talk about what turning pro really means. What does turning pro mean to you? The... there are a lot of us out there, including me in the past, who are amateurs, who are living their lives as amateurs. And it’s somebody that wants to be a writer but only dabbles once in awhile and, you know, puts a few words down. Somebody who wants to shoot a film, somebody who wants to be a painter, somebody who wants to be an entrepreneur, and doesn’t really get it going. And my... I think a lot of times when we try to ask ourselves, “Well, what’s... what’s wrong? What’s happening that I... won’t let me do this?” We can blame ourselves, you know, we think that there’s something wrong with us or we’re sick or we have neurotic tendencies or whatever. My instinct about the whole thing is to forget all that stuff and just look at it from the prism of are we a pro or are we an amateur? And if we’re a professional, then we don't accept any excuses from ourselves. You know? And when the day comes and when we wake up in the morning and we don't feel like doing whatever it is we know we need to do, a professional gets up and does it. You know, Kobe Bryant goes to the gym, Lebron James goes to the gym every... a pro does what he has to do. Whereas an amateur will crap out along the way, you know, they’re a weekend warrior, blah, blah, blah. So the whole point of the book, Turning Pro, is to try to make... to encourage people to make that switch in their mind. It doesn't cost any money, you don't have to buy any product, you don't have to take any course, nobody gets rich off you or anything like that, you know? Right, right. You just change your mind from being... from being a pro to being an amateur. I’ll tell you a little story that we haven’t even talked about, Marie. I had a woman friend a few years ago who took up golf. And, you know, people get bitten by the golf bug and they just go crazy. Right? Yeah. And she had been playing for about a month and she was absolutely terrible of course as anybody would be. So she invited me to come out and play golf with her, and when I showed up at the golf course she was decked out from head to toe. She had the beautiful shoes, she had the beautiful visor, and she was terrible. It was terrible. And I said, “What’s the story Kathy?” You know? And she said, “You know what Steve? I’ve decided to think of myself as a pro.” She said, “I know I stink. I know I suck. I know it’s gonna take me years. But I am gonna take this seriously. I’m gonna have the right gear,” and she had got herself on a program of lessons, a program of practice, you know, where she put in X number of hours a day, and she was practicing the way a pro practices. In other words, not just doing the fun things, the glamorous things... Right. ...but the boring stuff. You know? The 3 foot putts and things like that. And, of course, within 9 months she was a good golfer. Now she’s a terrific golfer. But I remember when she... when I first heard that from her I thought, “Wow, that is really a wild idea.” And so that’s an example of just somebody who just put the mindset in and, “I’m not gonna be a dingle at times. I’m not gonna be a dabbler. I may be no good, but I’m gonna commit to this full time,” and she did. And that... so that’s what turning pro is. I love this idea, and I have to tell you, you know, you know I’m a huge fan of The War of Art, I’m a huge fan of Do the Work as well. And we’ve done interviews in the past, which we’ll put links below for all of you guys if this is your first time hearing Steven and I talk together, and I remember being struck in The War of Art by the idea of turning pro. And actually, I’ve taught and talked about it, always crediting you of course and like pimping out your book right and left, because that... the singular concept of turning pro, it’s magical. It really is magical and it informs everything that you do. One of the things... Let me interrupt you, Marie. I know we were talking about this before. Yeah. Did you have a moment of turning pro? And if so, what was it? You know, I feel like much like you, which when you read the book you guys will know this, there was probably several moments and then there was a period where I was like, “I gotta do this.” You know? And it was like a training ground. And I think when I first started out and I knew that coaching and personal development and business growth, they were passions of mine and I knew I had a message to share but I wasn’t quite sure how it was all gonna fit together. You know, I was bartending a lot, that’s how I earned enough money to get my business going during the day. And I was writing my newsletters but I thought they were crap, which I'm sure they probably were, but I was just putting them out there and I feel like I was almost like... I was like a baby pro where I would do the minimum work that I needed to do, but then I had so much fear and self doubt and, you know, I was in my early 20s. And I would at the end of the night of bartending sometimes totally drink too much and be out until like 3 or 4 in the morning. You know what I mean? So it was like I would have these levels of little wins and then I think it almost... there was like too much energy or I couldn't handle it or I wasn’t willing to just really stay there and I would self sabotage a bit. And I think... Well was there actual moments that you... That I decided that this was it? ...suddenly decided? You know, I feel like it was... I don’t remember like an exact moment, but I do remember a specific period in my life and it was when I met my fiance Josh who I’m with today, we’ve been together for almost 10 years. And there was something around that period of meeting him when I really took ownership of my gifts and I stopped screwing around. And it was about that time that while I never had like a problem with drinking, the partying kind of went away. Uh huh. Do you know what I mean? Exactly. Like, doing those stupid things that just throw you off track, those things kind of melted away. And that was the time when I, not coincidentally, started making more money, started receiving, you know, some opportunities that never seemed to happen before. Things started lining up when I feel like I met him, I owned my gifts, there was something that kind of settled in myself. And while nothing started coming along easily, there was something that changed in me and it was something about... again, it was around that partying idea of not like just saying, “Oh well, you know, who cares? I’ll just stay out all night.” Or... you know what I mean? “I don't need to get to that newsletter in the morning, I can push it off to next week.” Like, I stopped doing those things. I mean, in a way what you’re doing now, Marie, is sort of a form of partying, but it’s kind of positive partying. You know? That’s totally right. So it’s not as though you went from A to Z, it’s just you sort of changed the metaphor a little bit. You know? Where you made it direct instead of indirect. Yeah, and I think it was also too, you know, you talk about this in the book a little bit where, you know, you change how you treat your body, you change when you go to sleep, you change when you wake up, you change just how you approach everything when you’re a pro. And there’s this sense, for me in my experience, of just reverence and honoring the fact that I'm here for a reason and I make a difference to other people and that that’s important. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I can't just, you know, flitter that away. And so that... Well there’s a story, we were talking about this earlier, in Turning Pro that I stole from Rosanne Cash’s wonderful memoir called Composed, and it’s sort of her moment of turning pro. And it takes a few minutes to tell the story, but I’m gonna tell it. It was a dream that she had. And at this time, I think it was like the late 80s, and she already was a success. In fact, she had an album out called King’s Record Shop that had 4 number one songs off of it. And... but something didn’t feel right to her in her life. Now one night she had a dream, and in the dream she was sitting... she was at a party and she was sitting on a couch next to Linda Ronstadt who had alway been kind of an idol of hers and she had always admired Heart Like a Wheel, the great records that Linda Ronstadt did back in the 70s. And in between the two of them was an older man named Art, very important, and Art was talking very animatedly to Linda. And Rosanne wanted to kind of break into the conversation. She tried to, and Art just turned around to her in the dream and gave her this withering look of disdain and non interest and just said, “We don’t talk to dilettantes.” And Rosanne said she woke up... she woke up and she was just shattered to the core and she realized that it was true. That even though she had had these number one hits that she’d always thought of herself as a songwriter, but she’d only written 4 songs on this album and they were not the big songs. So she said from that day forward, just like you just were saying about how it changed when you wake up in the morning... Yes. ...she said she changed everything about her life. She got her singing teachers that she’d never, you know, real technique teachers that she had never done before. She said she started training like an athlete. She had began reading a much broader scope of all different kinds of art. She began studying painting so she could see what a non verbal, non musical medium was. Yup. And kind of the... and she... even her marriage broke up over this kind of thing, or at least eventually. Right. And she just decided, “I have to... I’ve been an amateur. I may have had success, but it doesn't feel good to me.” And so she’s kind of totally committed to songwriting and learning and she felt, she said, like she went back to being very young, like a beginner. Yes. And that was where she wanted to be. And I forgot what the last line of the thing... something like, “I traded the morphine sleep of success for the livewire world of the artist.” So that was... that to me is like a great turning pro moment in a dream, didn't even have to be, you know, like waking up drunk in a gutter somewhere or something. Yeah. It was just a dream, so... I love that. That’s one of my favorite stories in the book and I think one of the other ones, and I’d love to ask you about this, you know, you talk about the moment in New York City for you when you were driving a cab and you’re in an apartment and you just couldn't take it anymore and you had to write. And then what I loved, and you painted this picture so beautifully, was like you wrote for a little while, and if I remember correctly it wasn't like it was necessarily any good but you didn't care, you just actually had beat resistance and you sat down and you wrote. And then you almost found yourself just like cleaning the dishes, like, dirty dishes that were in there for like 10 days and you were whistling. It was like something had broken through. You had broken through your resistance. Yeah, that was kind of my sort of moment. It wasn’t as much fun as Roseanne's moment, but that was preceded by my trying for years to write novels and always crapping out at them on the one yard line. You know? And exploding my life, self sabotaging, and all that. And I’d reached the point where the idea of sitting down at a typewriter was like just... to me was like shooting myself in the head. Right. But this one particular night I just, like you were talking about partying, I just kinda sat there and I thought, “Well, who can I call? Where can I go? What can I drink? What can I smoke?” You know? Right. And finally I just said, “I just can’t do this.” And I sat down for 2 hours typing... terrible, so I just threw it away. You know? But that wasn’t the point. It was just... when I was finished, I actually felt ok and that was why when I was washing the dishes after that I discovered I was whistling, which I never whistled. You know? I thought, “I feel ok.” And that was... kinda told me I was gonna be ok from then on even if it might take me another 30 years to do anything good, at least that I was gonna be ok. So that was my kind of... that was my moment. That was really cool. And then you wrote about, in another section in the book, about your year of turning pro. And what I loved about that, and I’d love to chat about that for a moment, is, you know, this idea of turning pro, it’s a decision that we make in a moment, yet it’s a decision that we have to recommit to each and every day and develop that habit. So how was that year for you? That’s exactly... you hit the nail on the head there, Marie. Because there is... there’s... it’s like a moment of saying, “I’m not gonna drink anymore.” Right? You go, “Oh wow! This is fantastic!” But then the next day, you know... so I... for me, I... my white whale was to finish a book. To take it from page 1 to the end, which I never had been able to do. So I saved up all my money, the short version of it, and I moved to a little town in northern California and I just had a year where I didn’t see anybody. I had, like, you know, no sex, no sports, no TV, no music. I was like Rocky. I would get up in the morning, I’d have a breakfast of liver and eggs. You know? And it was just me and my little cat, my cat Mo, and... but it was great because it was a year when I’d had no distractions and I could just focus day after day after day. And when you do that, as you know, you know, energy concentrates around you and you become really a different person. Yeah. And when I finally actually did finish it... and it never sold. You know? And the two books after that didn't sell either. But at that... in that year, I really knew that I had become a pro, that I could do it. You know? And so it’s great beyond that initial breakthrough to be able to establish the habits of a professional instead of the habits of an amateur. Yeah. And I... The amateur’s habit is as soon as any adversity shows up, the amateur just falls out. Right? But the pro, when adversity shows up, keeps going and just builds that as a habit... Yes. ...and many, many, many other habits like that. Yeah, I love that. And it reminds me too of the story you told in the beginning about your friend where she bought all her gear. Like, I love that! Just, you know, getting on the gear and going, “I am committed to this.” You know, “The bumps are gonna come, the obstacles are gonna come, but a professional doesn’t run away. A professional stays, does the work, gets it done, shows up the next day, here we go again.” And actually, Marie, that leads to another really important concept here I think is that when my friend bought all this golfing gear, she really put herself on the line. She put... there was risk now because she was lousy. People would say, “What an idiot out there dressing like, you know, Annika Sorenstam, but can’t hit the ball off the tee.” Right. So it’s the same thing when you mentally... I think a lot of the... the reason why a lot of people remain amateurs is it’s a way of protecting yourself where you say, “Ok, I failed but, you know, it was because I didn’t really try that hard.” Right. You know, “If I really had tried, I could’ve done it.” You know? Right. So when you commit in your mind as a professional, now if you fail you’re gonna really feel it. You know, you say, “Man, I gave it everything I had and I still...” But, of course, the real answer to that is that it doesn't work that way. Once you commit, you get so much power out of that that even if you fail, you just dust yourself off you say, “Hey, that was just one shot. I’m gonna try it again.” And you’ve established the habits of a professional and that’s the most important thing. Success in my opinion, will come over time if you just have, you know, make it... create a practice for yourself in whatever it is and just keep doing it, keep doing it, dedicate yourself to it. Take it seriously. Yeah. No, I love it. I seriously... I’ve reread your books I don't know how many times. They’re like soul vitamins to me. It’s really good. So, one of the things you talk about on page 73 in Turning Pro, which I think is so vital and it’s something I hear from our community all the time, is what happens when you turn pro in terms of who you spend time with and who wants to spend time with you. And how everything starts to shift, or can start to shift, underneath your feet when you start making these changes. Did you experience that in your own life? Like, was there... Absolutely, and I see it in other friends of mine as I watch them kind of turn pro. Yeah. And... I don't know. Did you ever see the movie a couple years ago called The Fighter? With Mark Wahlberg... Yes. ...as a boxer? Love, love. That’s like a classic story of this guy who has real talent as a fighter and his entire family is just sabotaging him. You know, his mom is his manager, his brother is this crazy, you know, ex fighter. Everybody’s just trying to bring him down because his success would be a reproach to them. Yes. Because they... So when you turn pro, if you’re a writer and you suddenly start to really write, your friends are gonna try to sabotage you. You know? I hate to say it, but even the people closest to you because they like you just the way you are. You know? They like you, you know, getting stoned with them or whatever amateur habits you have. Yes. And if you suddenly start taking something seriously, they’re not gonna like it. I have a friend right now who is really kind of committing as a writer, and he has some friends who are kind of wealthy and what they’re doing to him, it’s amazing to see, he’s totally aware of it, they keep inviting him to Hawaii and to, you know... You know? And, you know, they would never talk to it, but they’re trying to sabotage him. You know? Right. And he’s actually struggling with confronting them and making them take him seriously. You know? They’re gonna have to switch how they see him. And so, yeah, when you turn professional, there’s some people that you have in your life now that you’re not gonna be able to have. Right. If... But you’ll make new friends. That’s right. That’s really right. New friends come into your life and they recognize your commitment and, you know, the universe draws them to you and draws you into them. Yeah, it’s so... Have you found that, Marie, yourself? Oh my goodness, well I’ve found just naturally... and I think, you know, one important note, for me at least this has been my experience. It’s hardest always in the beginning. And once you kind of make that switch and you turn pro and this becomes your lifestyle and it’s consistent for the most part, it’s like it’s only that initial shift that’s hard. You know? But once... Yeah. Now, for me, I would say, you know, I’m probably at least 10 years in. I don't have anyone in my life, thank God. I’m like knocking on everything. Like, they fully get who I am. They fully get I’m committed and if I say no to a social engagement or I say, “No, you know, I gotta get home early. I’ve got, you know, this thing we’re creating in the morning. We have, you know, two days of shooting MarieTV in the morning.” Like, they get it, they honor that. You’re like, “Girl, get home. You gotta get home and do your thing.” And, you know, it’s... there’s a blessing there. But I think it was... I think it’s more so in the beginning, you know, if you’ve had kind of habits going for a while and you’ve had a crew of friends or people are just used to you treating yourself a certain way and then all of a sudden you change, it’s like that transition period I think is the hardest. And for me... You’re absolutely right. Yeah. Yeah. But then once you kind of master your new posse and your new crew and you kind of become that different person, you don't really have to deal with it as much. You don't seem to even... Sure, if you have people that now try to enter your life and you can sort of see that they’re not gonna be good for you. Am I right? And you kind of block them out right away and don’t take the hook and get involved in any way. That’s 100% right. I think it’s also really important as creators, right, to take a look at that through even opportunities. You know, sometimes people... I’m sure you’ll have opportunities come into your email box or your agents or anyone and say, “Hey, would you like to get involved in this project?” Or, “Hey, would you like to come to this conference?” Or, you know, “Do this or speak here...” You’re absolutely right. These opportunities can really be traps. Yes. If it’s not the right opportunity. Yes. And I think that that’s another form of it where, you know, things can look shiny on paper or look like they’ll be like this great big thing for you, but when you’re a pro and when you have your priorities straight... there’s this great quote that I love, you know, “Priorities equal prosperity.” I think it’s by a woman named Michelle Singletary. Wow. When your priorities are clear, everything else becomes really simple. You know? All of those opportunities, you don't feel like they’re shiny object that could save you because... Yeah. ...you know your path, you know your method of creation, and you know what’s gonna get you the results that you want. The spiritual results, the, you know, creative results, the satisfaction, the work that you’re meant to do. Yeah. Yeah. Very, very true. And as these opportunities appear... I’ve been struggling with this myself. You know? The last couple of years where things come in and, like you say, shiny objects. You go, “Ooh, wow. That really sounds great.” You know? And then you take... you say yes to a few of these things and then you get into it and you go, “Oh my God, why did I do this?” You know? And you sort of begin to define yourself in... like that quote on priorities, you kind of ask yourself, “What is important to me?” You know? Yes. Is making a quick, you know, few thousand dollars important? No, it’s not. You know? Or... and so it is a process of evolution, of understanding who you are and what is important to you. Speaking of that, this is the perfect segway to I think talking about your publishing company. Right? With your partner Sean, Black Irish Books. One of the things I found fascinating when we were having our email exchange, I didn't realize that Turning Pro... that you guys published this yourself. And I know that you’ve done so many things, I mean, screenplays and other types of books and movies and everything. But now you have both the experience with traditional publishing and self publishing. Talk to us a little bit about that. What... why did you make that choice? Well, I’m not sure, Marie, if my experience will apply to a lot of other people because the... right now I’m working on a big book and I’m doing it with a traditional publisher. And I always would do that. Yeah. And I’m only a believer in self publishing in... for... like for me, for The War of Art and for Turning Pro, because it makes sense for me on those books. Yup. The reason is that I was getting screwed so badly by the publisher of... which everybody does because the share that the author gets is so small. Right. It was a no brainer when The War of Art had a 10 year contract, and when it ended Sean said to me, my partner, said, “Let’s just republish this ourselves. So instead of getting 35 cents a copy, we’ll get 3.50 a copy.” You know? Yay! “Instead of on the ebooks where we get, like, nothing a copy, we get, you know, at least a certain amount.” So that was pretty important and it’s great fun to do it, you know, to have control. It’s not that difficult and I’m sure you know this yourself. Yeah. Books or to do ebooks, it’s not that hard. It’s just a matter of, you know, hooking up with the right people that know how to do the technical stuff. But I’m not... I’m not sure I could really give advice to someone like a first time novelist or a first time writer that’s nonfiction. That’s ok. It certainly... I think it’s just interesting and cool that we have these possibilities today. Right? Absolutely. And if you don't mind giving up the dream of making a fortune, if you’re willing to sort of live out in a long tail, you know, where you don't sell so many but where you control your own destiny, then there’s a lot to be said for this kind of thing. I have a niece, my niece Laura is like 22 years old and she has written 4 books that are in the kind of Twilight, in that area. I love that series. Tales of Arabia: The Last Witch, Laura Freeman. And she publishes it herself and she’s got a following. And so, you know, she’s not getting rich, but it’s certainly something that she’s out there so somebody could discover her. So I’m all in favor of the various entry of falling a lot, but I don't think you’re gonna get rich doing it. It’s not the answer to anything. You still... it’s gotta be great for it to get out there, whatever it is, or a song or an album or whatever... film. Yeah. No it’s... I think it’s awesome. I’ve done both as well. I’ve done the... I actually started off self publishing my book and then wound up selling it to McGraw Hill and really grateful because it’s in like 11 languages, but people have been... Good for you. Thank you! For the past few years like, “Marie, where’s your next book? Where’s your next book?” And I have so much fun with video and I create digital courses and digital programs where it’s like, I have complete control. I can be the crazy creator that I am and no one is telling me what I can or can’t put on any cover. Like, it’s just... Yeah. And I think there’s many of us out there that, you know, this is a really exciting time to live in and, you know, what’s really cool is you don't necessarily have to choose. You can live in both worlds or several worlds and use it in a way that works best for the content, for the medium, and, you know, strike the deals that are gonna make the most sense for everybody. The other thing that nobody talks about about self publishing is that you... when you’re published by a mainstream company, or I’m sure this is true if you’re on a label if you’re a band or something like that, there’s certain things, a lot of things, they won't let you do to promote your own stuff. For instance, they won't let you give away stuff. They won't let you give away the book or give away the song because their model is the scarcity model... Right. ...where it’s everything... when you give away everything you don’t sell. Right. Well I’m completely from the other school which is the real problem is anonymity. Nobody knows you’re there. So if you give away 10,000 units at least 10,000 people now know who you are or have heard of the thing. So that’s a real... it’s beyond just having... controlling your cover art or anything like that. It’s... you’re allowed to do, to work for yourself. Yes. Because it won't let you do it. I think... have you also too, one of the other things that always struck me as a little odd and I got a little protective was the fact that I wasn't gonna own my own content. I was like, “What are you talking about? I wrote it!” I was like I really would like to be able to do other stuff with it because I think it’s good and, you know... Yeah. ...a lot of the older traditional deals sometimes it’s, you know, that’s what you’re selling them is your content and if you have creative ideas about how you’d like to turn it multimedia or other things, it can just get really hairy. And I always say I’m like, “I am such a control freak.” People always tell me on MarieTV, they’re like, “Don’t you... why aren’t you on regular television? Don’t you want your own TV show?” I’m like, “I have my own TV show, it’s this. I can control anything I want, I can say anything I want, and we can do anything we want.” Not to say that, you know, it won’t expand at some point, but... You probably will have your own TV show. You know, but it’s... that’s I think what’s so miraculous about our time and to be creators at this point on planet Earth is the incredible options that if you do wanna turn pro, you have something to create. Music, fine art, books, movies, you know, anything, a business, whatever you wanna create, it’s like what you’re saying. The barriers to entry have become so low that now the real work is the inner work, is to overcome those inner demons. Well put Marie. Yeah, really, really exciting. So, Steven, I don't wanna take up too much more of your time because I know you are a busy man. But what we love to do, which I told you about MarieTV, is always challenge our audience. And if you guys have gotten some good stuff out of this conversation with Steven, remember, you have to get this book. I have two of them in my house and I’m sure I’m gonna be giving away more. We’ll put the link to Black Irish Books below this interview so you can go right there and get it. What we wanna do is talk a little bit about habits. Right Steven? I mean, you say that the difference between an amateur and a professional really is in the habits. Their habits, yeah. A pro has professional habits and an amateur has amateur habits. That's right. And we all have habits since we’re human, it’s the majority of kind of how our lives run are our habits. So it’s not like we can get rid of them, but we can upgrade them. So what Steven and I want to challenge you to do right now is to take a look and... take a look within yourself and see, do you have an amateur habit that right now you are willing to commit to upgrade to a pro habit? What would that one habit be? Almost like a keystone habit that would change everything. And write about it in the comments below this video. I for one am very interested to see, because I think there’s gonna be some very juicy stuff, and I think all of us have it. I’ll take a look for myself as well and see if there’s any amateur habits still lingering around that I can upgrade. Do you like that Steven? I like that. Alright, good. And actually, thinking about my friend that turned pro as a golfer even when she was lousy, I mean, really what she did was she kind of committed to professional habits and she said to herself, “I’m gonna practice, you know, every day. I’m gonna practice the right way, etcetera, etcetera.” So she traded in amateur habits for professional habits and it worked for her. Yeah, so we’re excited. I wanna see everything you have to say. As always, if you like this video, like it and please share it with your friends. And, of course, if you’re not watching this on MarieForleo.com all the good action happens in the comments back on MarieForleo.com, so get your butt on over there and join us because the discussion is rich. If you’re not yet on the newsletter list, please join us. Once again, you’ll see that at MarieForleo.com. And Steve, thank you so much once again for coming on MarieTV. You are awesome. Thanks for having me, it’s great fun to talk to you and get into this whole thing here. It's great. We’re all turning pro. Ok you guys, have a great afternoon. Thanks everybody. Bye. Thanks Marie.