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  • Far in the distant future,

  • the virus has wiped out 99% of humanity.

  • People stopped going to work,

  • the food ran out, cities collapsed.

  • A great battle was fought between the infected

  • versus the non infected -- we lost.

  • The last human is a lone programmer.

  • The year is 2020.

  • I guess I didn't need all this toilet paper after all.

  • What's up, what's going on out there?

  • It's uh... pretty quiet.

  • ...Haven't heard anything for a while. I was kind of hoping

  • that somebody else would take care of this mess

  • but some things you just got to do yourself.

  • Siri, give me a status update.

  • "99% worldwide infection all systems down."

  • Well, we've got our work cut out for us.

  • Maybe it's time I come out of retirement.

  • Let's see, the virus is composed

  • of a protein mitochondrial shell guarded

  • by a double helix strand protecting an inner core.

  • This membrane is then fused into the human cells

  • upon infection leading to exponential growth

  • and collapse of the host.

  • But, if we can insert a computer virus into the virus,

  • then we can hack it into it to override it, neutralizing it.

  • It might actually work.

  • In fact, this might be a pretty good interview question.

  • Do we have any interns?

  • Let's bring in an intern.

  • Oh right, fine, do it myself.

  • Assuming this all works, I'd still be the last human

  • on Earth but at least I'd be safe from infections

  • from other people but there aren't any.

  • Clever... I've got it.

  • By reverse engineering the RNA I was able

  • to decompile the viral genome into its base-4 encoding.

  • It's basically using a simple virality mechanism,

  • no different that how Facebook spams your notifications.

  • By using machine learning, all I have to do is match

  • for a pattern using neural networks.

  • Siri, perform a model fit trained

  • on a 98% accuracy classifier.

  • "Evaluating data model processing...

  • "Insufficient data."

  • damn it, I almost hacked into the protein core,

  • but I need more data. just a little bit more.

  • Come on.

  • "Insufficient data."

  • "Warning, model evaluation failed."

  • Useless! it's just doing a bunch of stupid pattern matching.

  • We need real algorithms... Fine, I'll just brute force it.

  • I have an algorithm backed by 400 leet codes

  • and a 500K total comp

  • If anything, that should work.

  • Just needs a little bit of Python.

  • It's like a leet code "medium" -- simple logarithmic partitioning

  • on a recursive queue of union-find trees

  • to locate the viral nucleus.

  • Okay, looking good.

  • Hey Siri, install Python,

  • "Installing Python."

  • "Insufficient user privileges."

  • Can't event get Python to run

  • in the DNA core, it's unsupported.

  • I never thought I'd have to resort to this.

  • I thought I buried it in my past long ago.

  • It's time to bring back React Native,

  • React Native, a cross platform framework that runs on iOS,

  • Android, Web and should run on the viral core as well.

  • Let's see, let me get this installed.

  • Why is it installing all these random dependencies?

  • What the hell?

  • It's installing Windows...

  • because of a dependency on Microsoft PowerPoint?

  • Garbage. What now?

  • JavaScript, it's the only other cross platform language that

  • works across all platforms, it's our only hope.

  • And as a full stack web developer,

  • let me just say, this is my forte.

  • Lets see, just gonna bring some jQuery, html5, CSS.

  • Web page loaded.

  • Here we go oh, yeah, we're back in business.

  • "Double Helix strand breached."

  • Almost... I need to descramble the protein shell.

  • "Warning, virus mutating."

  • The virus is mutating too fast.

  • I can't type fast enough.

  • The keys are so mushy on the damn MacBook Pro.

  • "Warning genome encrypted."

  • It's not Pro enough.

  • I can't even see what I'm typing anymore.

  • There's so many typos

  • and there's no type checking in JavaScript.

  • Does this even compile?

  • What a mess, what a mess, I can't.

  • The sky, it's so beautiful.

  • This whole time I don't think I ever truly appreciated it.

  • And yet, it's always been there,

  • This whole time.

  • It's time to get back to work.

  • I was saving this for a special occasion

  • but might as well use it now.

  • I have a plan.

  • Html, it's cross platform, and typos safe, it's gotta work.

  • "Html is not even a real language."

  • Shut up Siri I'm putting it on my resume anyways.

  • "Warning, infection imminent."

  • Out there, I realized something,

  • even if you can't see something

  • "Viral core breached"

  • It's always been there.

  • "The power level is over 9000."

  • Siri, run the program.

  • "Syntax error, compilation failed."

  • Compiler's wrong. Html isn't compiled.

  • Deploy to production.

  • "All tests pass."

  • "Deploying to prod."

Far in the distant future,

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