1 billion faithful.

10億忠實。

What requirements must you have for this lofty position:

對於這個高大上的職位，你必須具備哪些要求。

1) Be a catholic and

1）做一個天主教徒和

2) Be a man.

2）做一個男人。

Which seems a little thin… and, while it’s technically possible for a regular Sunday

這似乎有點單薄... 而且，雖然從技術上講，這對一個普通的週日來說是可能的。

Catholic to become pope, the last time this happened was essentially never because becoming

天主教徒成為教皇，上一次發生這種情況是基本上從來沒有因為成為

pope isn’t like becoming president, you can’t just run for office. Selecting the

教皇和當總統不一樣，你不能隨便競選。選擇

pope is an inside job and the men who do it are the cardinals, and while in theory they

教皇是一個內部工作，誰做它的人是紅衣主教，而在理論上，他們

can select any catholic man to become pope, in practice they prefer to elevate one of

可以選擇任何天主教徒成為教皇，在實踐中，他們更願意提升其中一個人。

their own.

他們自己的。

The last time a non-cardinal become pope was more than 600 years ago. So, while it isn’t

上一次非紅衣主教成為教皇已經是600多年前的事了。所以，雖然它不是

an official requirement, it’s an unofficial, official requirement.

官方要求，這是一個非官方的官方要求。

Thus in order to be pope you’ll first need to be a cardinal and to do that you’ll need

是以，為了成為教皇，你首先需要成為紅衣主教，而要做到這一點，你需要...

to start climbing the catholic corporate ladder.*

開始爬上天主教公司的階梯。

Step 1: Become a Priest. Unlike some churches where you can fill out

第一步：成為牧師。不像有些教會，你可以在這裡填寫

a form online and – poof – ordained. The Catholic Church treats becoming a priest as

在網上填一張表格，然後--噗--被封為牧師。天主教會將成為牧師視為

a real, you-need-training profession. So you’re going to require a lot of education: usually

一個真正的，你需要培訓的職業。所以你需要接受大量的教育：通常情況下

a college degree in Catholic Philosophy and then a masters in divinity.

天主教哲學的大學學位，然後是神學碩士。

In addition to your educational qualifications, you must also be:

除了學歷外，你還必須是。

A man Unmarried,

一個未婚的男人。

Willing to remain celibate forever.† If you meet these requirements, and have been

願意永遠保持獨身主義。

working with the church, then you can be officially ordained as a priest. Which basically means

與教會合作，然後你就可以被正式任命為牧師。這基本上意味著

you get to run a Catholic Church, or work with another priest who does.

你可以經營一個天主教堂，或者和另一個牧師一起工作。

But, you want onward and to do that you need to take the job of the man who just made you

但是，你想繼續前進，要做到這一點，你需要接受剛剛讓你的人的工作。

a priest.

一個牧師。

Step 2: Become a Bishop Bishops are a much more select group: while

第2步：成為主教 主教是一個更有選擇性的群體：而

there are about 400,000 catholic priests world wide, there are only about 5,000 bishops.

全世界大約有40萬天主教神父，只有大約5000名主教。

While priests get churches, bishops get cathedrals, from which they oversee a number of local

牧師得到了教堂，主教得到了大教堂，他們在大教堂裡監督著一些地方的

churches.

教堂。

To advance your career you must wait for a bishop in your area to be forced into retirement

要想提升自己的事業，就必須等你所在地區的主教被迫退休後才行

at age 75 or die sooner than that – freeing up space for you.

在75歲的時候，或者更早地死去--為你騰出空間。

But you can’t just apply, because there’s already a secret list of potential bishops

但你不能隨便申請，因為已經有一份潛在主教的祕密名單。

that’s updated every three years based on who the current bishops in your area think

每三年更新一次 根據你所在地區的現任主教認為誰是主教

would make a good replacement for one of their own.

會是一個很好的替代自己的人。

To be on that list, in addition to the obvious requirement of being a pious person, you should

要想上榜，除了作為一個虔誠的人這一顯而易見的要求外，你還應該是

also:

還：

Be least 35 years old Have been priest for at least five years

年滿35歲，擔任牧師至少5年。

Have a doctorate in theology (or equivalent) Assuming you’re all these things, your name

擁有神學博士學位（或同等學歷） 假設你具備這些條件，你的名字是

may, or may not be on the secret list. The local bishops then give that list to the pope’s

可能，也可能不在祕密名單上。當地的主教們會把這份名單交給教皇。

ambassador for your country, known as the Apostolic Nuncio.

駐貴國大使，即所謂的 "教廷大使"。

The Nuncio picks three priests from the list, does in-depth research on them, conducts interviews

牧師從名單中挑選出三名牧師，對他們進行深入調查，進行訪談

and selects the one he thinks is best.

並選擇他認為最好的。

But it’s not over, because the Nuncio sends his report to Vatican City and the congress

但這還沒有結束，因為大使把他的報告送到梵蒂岡城和國會去了

of bishops who work there reviewing potential appointments from around the world.

在那裡工作的主教們審查來自世界各地的潛在任命。

If the congress of bishops doesn’t like any of the three candidates, they can tell

如果主教大會不喜歡三個候選人中的任何一個，他們可以告訴... ...

the Nuncio to start over: returning to the list, picking another three candidates – doing

從頭再來：回到名單上，再選三個候選人 -- -- 這樣就可以了。

more research, more interviews and sending off the results.

多調研，多采訪，發成果。

When the congress of bishops is happy with one of the Nuncio’s candidates that name

當主教大會對其中一個Nuncio的候選人感到滿意時，這個名字。

is given to the pope, who can reject the candidate and start the whole process over.

是給教皇的，他可以拒絕候選人，並重新開始整個過程。

It shouldn’t be a surprise that from a vacancy to a bishop’s replacement can take months

從一個空缺到接替主教的職位可能需要幾個月的時間，這並不令人驚訝

and, on occasion, years.

有時甚至是年。

But assuming that a bishop in your area retired (or died) at the right time and you were on

但假設你所在的地區有一位主教在合適的時間退休（或去世），而你又是在

the secret list of good priests and the Nuncio picked you and you made it through his interview

優秀牧師的祕密名單 牧師選中了你 你通過了他的面試

and the congress of bishops approved you and the pope didn’t veto you – poof now you’re

和主教大會準許你 和教皇沒有否決你 - 噗，現在你是

now a bishop.

現在是主教。

But you’re still not on top. The penultimate promotion is…

但你還是沒有上位。倒數第二個晉級的是...

Step 3: Become a Cardinal. Despite the fancy name and snazzy red outfits

第三步：成為紅衣主教。儘管有了花哨的名字和時髦的紅色服裝。

to match cardinals are not the bosses of bishops, they are bishops, just with an additional

匹配紅衣主教不是主教的老闆，他們是主教，只是多了一個主教。

title and additional responsibilities – the most notable of which is electing the new

職稱和額外的責任--其中最重要的是選舉新的主席。

pope.‡

教皇。

The only way to become a cardinal is to get to current pope to appoint you as one – and

成為紅衣主教的唯一途徑是讓現任教皇任命你為紅衣主教--而且

of the 5,000 bishops, only about 200 are ever cardinals.

在5000名主教中，只有200名左右是紅衣主教。

But let’s say your ambition doesn’t go unnoticed by the pope and he makes you a cardinal

但假設你的雄心壯志沒有被教皇忽視 他讓你成為紅衣主教。

– now it’s time to play the waiting game for his death or retirement – and with popes

- 現在是時候玩等待遊戲，等待他的死亡或退休--和教皇一起

death is vastly more likely.

死亡的可能性大大增加。

When either happens the cardinals under the age of 80 are brought to Vatican City where

當其中一種情況發生時，80歲以下的紅衣主教會被帶到梵蒂岡城，在那裡

they are isolated from the outside world – presumably by taking away their cell phones and tablets

他們與外界隔絕--大概是通過拿走他們的手機和平板電腦吧。

and carrier pigeons. Once sequestered, the election of a new pope can begin.

和信鴿。一旦被封存，就可以開始選舉新的教皇。

These elections are never exactly the same because the ex-pope leaves instructions on

這些選舉從來沒有完全相同的，因為前教皇留下的訓示上

how he wants his replacement to be picked, but in general it works like this: four times

他希望如何選擇他的替代者，但在一般情況下，它的工作原理是這樣的：四次。

a day the cardinals go to the Sistine Chapel to vote – to become pope one of them must

每天紅衣主教們都會去西斯廷教堂投票--要想成為教皇，他們中必須有一個人。

get a 2/3rds majority.

獲得2/3的多數。

There’s a big dose of musent-be-too-hasty here as the cardinals don’t just raise their

這裡有一個大劑量的麝香太討厭，因為紅雀不只是提高他們的。

hands, or use a modern preferential voting system, but instead write down one name on

手，或使用現代優先投票系統，而是在

a piece of paper stand before the alter and say a long latin phrase, before officially

一張紙站在神龕前，說一句長長的拉丁語，然後才正式開始

casting the ballot.

投票：

Once all the cardinals have done this, the votes are counted and then burned.

當所有的紅衣主教都這樣做了之後，就會對選票進行統計，然後燒掉。

This why TV news stations covering the election of the pope use super-modern-hd-livestreaming

這就是為什麼電視新聞臺在報道教皇選舉時使用了超現代高清直播的原因

cameras to look at a chimney. If the smoke is black, no new pope.

攝影機看煙囪。如果煙是黑色的，沒有新的教皇。

The high victory threshold, and tediously slow voting process, is why it takes so long

勝利門檻高，投票過程繁瑣緩慢，所以才會耗費這麼長時間

to elect a new pope. It’s usually at least two weeks of voting four times a day six days

來選舉新教皇。通常至少有兩個星期的時間，一天四次，一天六天的投票。

a week (with one day a week for prayer) but the record length is three years.

一週（每週有一天禱告），但記錄長度是三年。

Assuming you, eventually, win the support of your fellow cardinals, you have one final

假設你最終贏得了你的紅衣主教同僚的支持，你還有最後的一個機會

thing to do before becoming pope: pick yourself a new name.

成為教皇前要做的事：給自己取個新名字。

There is no formal rule, you can name yourself anything you like but it’s tradition to

沒有正式的規定，你可以給自己取任何名字，但傳統的做法是

take the name of a previous pope.

以前任教皇的名義。

Upon your acceptance of the job, the final ballots are burned clean to make the smoke

在您接受工作後，最後的選票被燒得乾乾淨淨，使煙

white and announce to the world that a new pope has been selected.

白，並向世界宣佈新教皇已經選定。

So that’s the career path: be born into the right half of the population, become one

所以，這就是職業道路：生在對半邊天，成為一個。

of a billion catholics, then one of 400,000 priests, then one of 5,000 bishops, then one

十億天主教徒中的一員，然後是40萬名牧師中的一員，然後是5000名主教中的一員，然後是一個

of 200 cardinals, wait for the current pope to die or retire, and convince 2/3rds of your

200名紅衣主教，等待現任教皇死亡或退休，並說服2/3的你的。

fellow cardinals to select you as the one, the only pope.

紅衣主教們選擇你作為唯一的教皇。