Badly!

傷得很重！

I mean, look, Billy Joel has built his whole career on singing about rejection.

我的意思是，看看比利喬唱有關被拒絕的歌，而建立起的歌唱事業。

And feeling studies have shown that rejection is really not that far removed from actual physical pain.

而且情感研究學顯示，被拒絕的感覺與身體上的痛苦其實沒差多少。

Today on WellCast, we took our viewer's suggestion.

今天，WellCast 聽取了觀眾的建議。

Thanks for the awesome idea, Ken Jackson!

Ken Jackson 謝謝你的好主意啦！

Today, we're going to be looking into social rejection.

今天我們要調查社交上的拒絕。

We're gonna examine why being suddenly shunned from a group of peers or friends is damaging your psyche.

我們要調查為什麼遭到同儕或朋友突然地迴避會使你心靈受創。

And give you our 3-step take-back-your-life-method for remaining healthy, happy, and in control.

然後我們會教你三步驟 「找回生命意義」的方法，讓你保持健康、快樂並掌握人生。

If you're upset after some form of social rejection, say your friends have stopped talking to you or your coworkers are giving you the cold shoulder, that's totally normal.

如果你因人際互動上受到排斥而心煩意亂，例如：你的朋友不跟你說話了，或是同事故意冷落你，那都很正常。

Put simply, a negative reaction to social exclusion, is ingrained in humans because being part of a social community has so many perks.

簡單來說，對社會排斥的負面反應深深烙印在我們腦中，因為成為社會的一份子總有許多好處。

Humans are hardwired to feel pain when excluded.

人們天生就會因不被別人接納而感到痛苦。

It's how we stay alive, and it's not just psychological pain either.

這就是人類生存的方式，而這種痛苦不只是心理上的。

Take a 2003 study done by neuroscientists at UCLA.

以加州大學洛杉磯分校 2003 年神經學家所做的研究來說。

These researchers simulated social exclusion with the computer game in which the participants played catch with what they believed to be other humans.

研究者用電腦遊戲模擬社會排斥，讓參與者扮演遊戲中的角色，與他們以為也是人類的玩家一起玩傳接球。

When this virtual game of catch became a virtual game of monkey in the middle,

當虛擬接球遊戲變成「你丟不給我接」遊戲時，

these participants who were hooked up to an MRI exhibited activity in the section of the brain that's usually associated with dire physical pain.

與受試者連接的核磁共振儀顯示，他們的腦部活躍區塊與人類身體經歷劇烈疼痛時相同。

So science has told us what we basically already know: It really really hurts to be excluded.

所以科學表明了我們已經知道的事：被孤立是真的非常非常痛苦。

But like we said, being rejected?

但像我們所說的，被拒絕呢？

Well, that's a part of life.

嗯，那是生活的一部份。

So what do we do?

那我們該怎麼做呢？

How do we stop from feeling so crummy when we're left out?

被排除在外時，要怎麼做才不會感覺那麼糟？

The best way to counter the pain of rejection is to seize control in deciding how to react to it.

處理被拒絕的痛苦最好的方式，就是掌握控制權。

And this brings us to our WellCast exercise.

而這就帶我們來到 WellCast 的練習啦！

Taking back your life triathlon.

回憶一下你的人生鐵人三項運動。

Step 1: Beef up your self-esteem!

第一步：提升自尊心！

Studies have shown that when cut-off from a social group, people with low self-esteem can sink into physical sickness, depression, and a storm of other maladies.

研究顯示，與社交群體斷絕關係後，低自尊的人們容易生病、沮喪或產生其他一堆疾病。

The clear fix is to build your self-esteem right now!

最好的處理辦法就是現在提升自尊心！

Easier said than done, we know!

我知道說比做簡單。

And it's hard to stay away from negative irrational thoughts.

遠離不理性的負面想法很難。

But try to think about your situation in a logical rather than emotional manner.

但試著用邏輯思考，而不是感情用事。

In your WellCast journal; write down your three biggest accomplishments in life.

在 WellCast 日誌上，寫下你生命中的三大成就。

The goal here is to not define yourself by one upsetting event but learn to define yourself by your accomplishments, your life experience.

不要因一件糟糕的事就定義自己，學著以自己的成就、經歷來看待自己。

Look at that list!

看看那個清單！

Believe in who you are.

相信自己。

And know your self-worth.

要知道自己是有價值的人。

Accomplishments are no easy feat.

達成成就絕非易事。

Seriously!

真的！

And trust me, you can rise above all of this negativity.

相信我，你可以克服所有負面想法。

Step 2: Treat your injuries!

第二步：好好養傷！

The emotional pain you're feeling right now is almost indistinguishable from physical pain in your brain.

腦袋很難區分情緒上的痛苦和身體上的痛苦。

So why not treat it as such?

所以為什麼不以相同方式對待他們？

You're in recovery.

你正在恢復中。

And scientists say that it’s crucial to maintain good physical health during times of emotional stress.

科學家也表明，有情緒壓力時，最好保持身體健康。

Work on getting an hour more of sleep a night.

晚上提前一小時睡覺。

Map out your meals ahead of time, and make sure you're getting fruits and vegetables.

提前安排三餐的計畫，確定有攝取蔬菜水果。

Exercise 30 minutes a day.

一天運動三十分鐘。

It'll release endorphins in your brain which will promote a sense of well-being.

這些都可以釋放腦內啡，並提升幸福感。

The healthier you stay, the higher your mood will peak, we promise.

身體越健康，就會越幸福，相信我。

Step 3: Get proactive!

第三步：主動點！

Think of this as a great opportunity to make new friends that you have more in common with.

把這想成結交志同道合朋友的機會。

Look for new social circles.

找個新的社交圈吧！

Join clubs, team sports, youth groups.

參加俱樂部、團體運動或青年團體。

Go after anything that piques your interest.

追求任何提起你興趣的事。

Use an excuse to practice that new-found self-confidence, and really go all-out to meet new people.

找個理由練習新找到的自信心，離開自己的世界去見新朋友，

Odds are, you'll find a group of friends with whom you will fit right in.

你很有機會找到一群適合你的朋友。

Alright, let's recap!

好啦，來複習一遍吧！

By taking control of your life – a control you thought you lost when you were socially rejected.

掌握你的人——當覺得被社會拒絕時，控制自己的想法。

You're less likely to be emotionally bogged down by what happened.

這樣比較不會因所發生的事陷入情緒泥沼。

You can do that by working to raise your self-esteem, taking care of yourself physically, and reaching out to form new friend groups.

想控制自己的想法，你可以提升自尊、好好照顧自己的身體，然後結交新朋友。

Did these tips work?

這些小撇步對你有幫助嗎？

Tweet us @watchwellcast.

用推特 @watchWellCast 告訴我們。

Email us at watchwellcast@gmail.com or leave a comment down below.

也可以寄信到 [email protected] 或是在影片底下留言。

We'll see you next time.

我們下次見。