字幕列表 影片播放
-
TONIGHT, SIX STATES HELD THEIR PRIMARIES, INCLUDING ONE OF THE
-
AREAS HARDEST HIT BY THE VIRUS, WASHINGTON STATE.
-
LUCKILY, ALL OF THEIR VOTING IS DONE BY MAIL.
-
BUT THERE IS SOME WORRY THAT THE MAIL-IN VOTES THEMSELVES COULD
-
BE A SOURCE OF CONTAGION, SO THE STATE JUST INTRODUCED THIS
-
ACTUAL NEW SLOGAN ABOUT THEIR BALLOT ENVELOPES:
-
"WHETHER HEALTHY OR SICK, PLEASE DON'T LICK."
-
( LAUGHTER ) YEAH.
-
IT'S BETTER THAN THE LAST ELECTION, WHEN THEY WERE
-
BATTLING AN S.T.D. OUTBREAK WITH THE SLOGAN, "PLEASE DON'T SLURP
-
IF YOU'VE GOT HERP.'" ( LAUGHTER )
-
THAT'S-- THAT'S ACTUALLY TRUE ALL THE TIME.
-
THAT'S GREAT ADVICE.
-
SOUND WISDOM, JEREMIAH.
-
THAT'S NOT ALL THE BIG ELECTION NEWS.
-
I'LL CATCH YOU UP ON THE LATEST IN TONIGHT'S EDITION OF:
-
IN >> I BEAT TRUMP!
-
>> CORN POP WAS A BAD DUDE.
-
>> BING, BING, BONG, BONG.
-
>> "FURY ROAD TO THE WHITE HOUSE: 2020."
-
THE SHOWDOWN TO FIND A PLACE TO SIT DOWN.
-
THE GLOVES OFF.
-
THE DENTURES ARE IN.
-
TWO OLD MEN ENTERS, ONE LEAVES.
-
COME ON, GO!
-
IT'S FURY ROAD!
-
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stepen: I HOPE THEY'RE
-
OKAY.
-
I HOPE THEY'RE OKAY.
-
THE DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY IS DOWN TO JOE BIDEN AND BERNIE SANDERS,
-
AND AS OF TODAY, PROJECTIONS AT fivethirtyeight.com SAY
-
JOE BIDEN'S CHANCES OF WINNING THE NOMINATION ARE 99 OUT
-
OF 100.
-
( AS BERNIE ) "BETRAYED BY THE 99%!
-
( LAUGHTER ) WHAT NEXT?
-
ET TU, METAMUCIL?" ( LAUGHTER )
-
OLD MEN NEED FIBER!
-
BUT JOE SEEMS INTENT ON BRINGING DOWN HIS OWN ODDS.
-
TODAY, WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN AN AUTO PLANT IN DETROIT, HE WAS
-
CONFRONTED BY A PRO-GUN VOTER, AND HE DIDN'T HANDLE IT ALL THAT
-
WAY.
-
>> YOU ARE ACTIVELY TRYING TO DIMINISH OUR SECONND AMENDMENT
-
RIGHT AND TAKE AWAY OUR GUNS.
-
>> YOU'RE FULL OF (BLEEP).
-
>> Stephen: WW!
-
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
-
WOW, JOE, WHAT HAPPENED TO MALARKEY?
-
COME ON, THE LAST THING WE NEED IS ANOTHER PRESIDENT I HAVE TO
-
BLEEP.
-
BIDEN TRIED TO EXPLAIN HIMSELF TO THE VOTER, AND IT ALMOST LED
-
TO FISTICUFFS.
-
>> I SUPPORT THE SECOND AMENDMENT.
-
I'M NOT TAKING YOUR GUN AWAY.
-
AT ALL.
-
YOU NEED 100 ROUNDS-- >> WHEN YOU SAY YOU'RE GONNA
-
TAKE OUR GUNS-- >> I DID NOT SAY THAT.
-
THAT'S NOT-- I DID NOT SAY THAT!
-
>> IT'S A VIRAL VIDEO.
-
THAT'S A VIRAL VIDEO LIKE THE OTHER ONES THEY'RE PUTTING OUT.
-
>> WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.
-
TAKE YOUR AR-14.
-
>> THIS IS NOT OKAY.
-
>> DON'T TELL ME THAT, PAL, OR I'M GOING TO GO OUT AND SLAP YOU
-
IN THE FACE.
-
>> Stephen: WOW!
-
HE IS THREATENING TO FIGHT A VOTER!
-
WE HAVEN'T SEEN THIS KIND OF ROUGH-AND-TUMBLE CAMPAIGN SINCE
-
WILLIAM HENRY HARRISON'S TIPPECANOE AND NUT-PUNCH TOO!
-
( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )
-
BIDEN'S TEAM IS AWARE THAT THE ONLY THING THAT CAN STOP JOE
-
BIDEN NOW IS JOE BIDEN.
-
SO THEY HAVE A BOLD NEW STRATEGY:
-
SHORTER SPEECHES.
-
IN FACT, WE HAVE A PREVIEW OF HIS NEW STUMP SPEECH.
-
♪ ♪ ♪ ( APPLAUSE )
-
>> BARACK OBAMA!
-
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THANK YOU.
-
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK
-
WITH CHARLES BARKLEY.