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  • - Joe Biden, former vice president

  • and Barack Obama's token white friend.

  • (upbeat jazzy music)

  • Joe Biden, like most old people, wasn't always old.

  • In fact, when he started his political career,

  • he was the fresh face.

  • - [Reporter] Biden's Senate career began

  • with him as the fifth youngest senator

  • ever elected at 29 in 1972.

  • - [Reporter] He served in the Senate for three decades.

  • - [Reporter] Biden's early years in the Senate

  • saw seismic political change.

  • The end of the Vietnam War,

  • the impeachment of Richard Nixon.

  • - [Reporter] Biden never moved to Washington,

  • choosing instead to commute home by train each night.

  • - [Reporter] He has a nickname of Amtrak Joe.

  • - I take this train, literally,

  • I've taken it over 7,400 times since I got in the Senate.

  • - But people don't just love Joe Biden

  • because he's a down to Earth, everyday man, no.

  • People love him because he's an adorable goofball.

  • In fact, the only thing that spends more time

  • in Biden's mouth than those perfect teeth is his own foot.

  • - [Reporter] His biggest possible weakness?

  • His reputation for verbal gaffes.

  • - As Barack says, a three letter word.

  • Jobs, J-O-B-S, jobs.

  • You cannot go to a 7-11 or a Dunkin' Donuts,

  • unless you have a slight Indian accent to fully,

  • I'm not joking.

  • His mama lived in Long Island for 10 years or so,

  • God rest her soul, and.

  • Oh she's, wait, your mom's still alive, and your dad passed.

  • God bless her soul.

  • - [Reporter] He said this is a politician in a wheelchair.

  • - Stand up, Chuck, let 'em see ya.

  • Oh, God love ya.

  • What am I talking about?

  • I tell you what,

  • you're making everybody else stand up though, pal.

  • Thank you very, very much.

  • I tell you what, stand up for Chuck.

  • - That's right.

  • Let's show Chuck what he's missing.

  • Everyone else stand up.

  • Let's rub it in.

  • This guy's got no hands.

  • How 'bout a round of applause?

  • Come on!

  • Come on!

  • You know what, in a weird way, I feel like these gaffes

  • are what made Biden the perfect balance to President Obama.

  • 'Cause Obama measured every word.

  • Like, you could feel him thinking as he was talking.

  • But when Biden talks, his brain just clicks,

  • I'm Feeling Lucky, and the first result

  • comes out of his mouth.

  • That's it.

  • Now, Biden didn't just spend

  • 50 years in Washington going viral.

  • The man has also had some major accomplishments.

  • - [Reporter] Biden would enter the race

  • as a foreign policy heavyweight.

  • In the Senate, he chaired the Foreign Relations Committee.

  • - [Reporter] 26 years ago, a then Senator Biden

  • wrote the Violence Against Women Act.

  • - He was a key player on guns in the '90s

  • with the Brady Bill and the assault weapons ban.

  • - [Reporter] Biden forced the president's hand

  • on the gay marriage issue, endorsing same-sex unions

  • before the president's planned announcement.

  • - Biden's been involved in issues that matter to Democrats,

  • gun control, women's rights, gay marriage,

  • he was even one of the first to support trans rights.

  • Although he probably thought he was supporting trains,

  • but that's still very impressive.

  • But anyone who's been around that long

  • is also gonna have some baggage.

  • And Biden, oh man, he's got enough baggage

  • to fill a whole Amtrak car.

  • - [Reporter] Biden is already explaining

  • a decades long record, including his rolling passing

  • the now controversial 1994 crime bill,

  • his vote for the Iraq War, skepticism of Anita Hill,

  • and past comments on busing to desegregate schools.

  • - Ooh, okay.

  • So on the downside,

  • Joe Biden got a lot of things wrong back in the day.

  • But on the upside, he managed to grow his hair back.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • Look at that, huh?

  • This guy has the Benjamin Button of scalps.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • Now, despite some problematic positions in his past,

  • many are saying that democrats are still likely

  • to vote for Joe Biden, partly because of how

  • progressive he's become, and partly because of how good

  • he is at getting under Trump's skin.

  • - The Press always asked me,

  • Don't I wish I were debating him.

  • No, I wish we were in high school.

  • I could take him behind the gym.

  • (crowd cheering) That's what I wish.

  • - Did you see where Biden wants to take me,

  • to the back of the barn, me.

  • He wants to.

  • I'd love that.

  • I'd love that.

  • Mr. Tough guy.

  • - If we were in high school,

  • I'd take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him.

  • - That would not last long.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • Go like this.

  • (blowing air)

  • He's down, and he'll never get up.

  • He'll never get up

  • - Old man fight, old man fight, old man fight!

  • This would be hilarious.

  • So, will Joe Biden, be the democrat

  • who gets to take on Trump?

  • Well, we'll have to wait and see.

  • But I'll be honest, part of me hopes that it does happen

  • just so that we get to watch

  • the most entertaining debates of all time.

  • - [Announcer] Sleepy Joe Biden.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • - [Biden] Mr. President, speak softly and carry a big stick.

  • (stick banging) (crowd cheering)

  • - [Trump] Go like this.

  • (banging) (crowd laughs)

  • He's down and he'll never get up.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • - Joe Biden has come out for a very large

  • federal gun buyback program and an assault weapons ban.

  • - To gun owners out there who say,

  • a Biden administration means

  • they're gonna come from my guns.

  • - Bingo.

  • You're right, if you have an assault weapon,

  • the fact of the matter is they should be illegal, period.

  • - Damn, Joe Biden.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • Whoa.

  • That's a bold statement.

  • Normally Democrats, when they ask the question,

  • they're like, "Oh, it's not a ban,

  • "and we're not gonna come for the guns, we're not gonna."

  • But Biden is like, "Bingo.

  • "I'll see your ass at midnight."

  • (crowd laughing)

  • Joe Biden has surged to a huge lead in the Democratic Party.

  • And in second place is Bernie Sanders.

  • Combined age, 642.

  • (crowd laughs)

  • It almost seems like they pulled

  • that move senior citizens do,

  • where they just cut to the front of the line.

  • Everyone's too polite to say anything, you just like,

  • just like him him cut, it might be his last meal ever,

  • let him go, let him go.

  • But I do find it interesting

  • that Biden has especially strong support among black women.

  • Help me understand,

  • why are so many black women leaning toward Joe Biden?

  • - Listen, don't get me wrong,

  • younger black women will probably go with Elizabeth Warren.

  • But for older black women, they're going to go with Biden,

  • because if Biden becomes president,

  • then Obama is back in the White House.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • Yes, yes!

  • (laughing) - But wait, wait.

  • - Yeah! - Wait.

  • Wait, but that's not true, Obama can't be president again.

  • - Who said anything about president?

  • If Joe Biden wins, he's gonna invite Obama over for dinner.

  • And where's dinner?

  • - The White House. - Boom!

  • (crowd cheering)

  • - Obama's back in the White House.

  • I mean it's sneaky, but it's all we got.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • - Okay fine, so maybe that explains black women's support.

  • But what's interesting to me, Dulce,

  • is that Democrats overall seem to be going with Biden,

  • which is strange like, considering how diverse

  • and fresh most of the other candidates are.

  • - Of course, yeah, this is just

  • a simple case of familiar dick.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • - Familiar dick?

  • - Yeah!

  • See, listen, y'all know what I'm talking about, okay?

  • There's that one dude you've been

  • hooking up with for years, right?

  • And sometimes you try something different,

  • but you always go back to him.

  • That's familiar dick.

  • (crowd laughing and cheering)

  • Y'all get it! (crowd cheering)

  • Listen, you know how well it does, what it does.

  • I mean, sure he's 37 and sells drugs on a child's bike.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • But it's the dick you know.

  • - Okay, so if I understand what you're saying,

  • you're saying Joe Biden's politics is the familiar penis

  • that the democrats wish to return to you.

  • - Now you're getting it, dimple dick.

  • (claps hands) (laughing)

  • (crowd cheering)

  • - The second night of the Democratic debates

  • ended just moments ago.

  • I don't know if it was Swalwel,

  • but the sharks could just smell blood in the water.

  • All I know is Biden had a target on his back.

  • - I was six years old when a presidential candidate

  • came to the California Democratic Convention and said,

  • "It's time to pass the torch

  • "to a new generation of Americans."

  • That candidate was then Senator, Joe Biden.

  • Joe Biden was right when he said it was time to pass

  • the torch to a new generation of Americans 32 years ago.

  • He's still right today.

  • If we're gonna solve the issues of our nation,

  • pass the torch.

  • If we're gonna solve the issues of climate chaos,

  • pass the torch.

  • If we're gonna solve this issue of student loan debt,

  • pass the torch.

  • If we're gonna end gun violence for families who are fearful

  • of sending their kids to school, pass the torch.

  • - [Interviewer] Vice President,

  • would you like to sing a torch--

  • - I would.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • I'm still holding on to that torch.

  • - That's right, Biden is not letting go of that torch,

  • even though that torch is really uncomfortable,

  • and told Biden that it does not like the way

  • that he's holding on to it.

  • He is holding on to that torch.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • Next up came immigration, all right?

  • The candidates told the audience how they planned

  • to undo the policies enacted by Trump.

  • No more kids in cages, increased legal immigration,

  • give everyone free ladders to climb over the wall.

  • But when it came to Joe Biden,

  • the moderator was more interested in hearing his opinions

  • on President Obama's policies.

  • - You served as vice president in an administration

  • that deported three million people,

  • the most ever in US history.

  • Are you prepared to say tonight that you and President Obama

  • made a mistake about deportations?

  • Why should Latinos trust you?

  • - This is the president who came along

  • with the DACA program.

  • No one had ever done that before.

  • This the President sent legislation the desk,

  • saying he wants to find a pathway for the 11 million

  • undocumented the United States of America.

  • Then we'll go back.

  • - [Interviewer] Yeah, but you didn't answer the question.

  • - Well, I did answer the question.

  • - [Interviewer] No, Did you make a mistake

  • with those deportations?

  • - The President did the best thing

  • that was able to be done--

  • - How about you?

  • - I'm the Vice President of the United States.

  • - Oh, that was not a good look for Biden.

  • Because this always happens, right?

  • When Obama is being praised,

  • Biden jumps into the picture with him.

  • But then Obama is being criticized, Biden's like,

  • "Look man, I was the Vice President, I didn't do shit.

  • The Vice President doesn't do shit.

  • Donald Trump has become good friends with Mexico,

  • and he's BFFs with Lil' Kim.

  • But there's one feud the president is not willing to end,

  • and it's with America's greatest enemy, Sleepy Joe.

  • - Well, I heard Biden, who's a loser.

  • I mean, look, Joe never got more than 1%,

  • except Obama took him off the trash heap.

  • And now it looks like he's failing.

  • He looks different than used to.

  • He acts different than he used to.

  • He's even slower than he used to be.

  • I'd rather run against, I think, Biden than anybody.

  • I think he's the weakest mentally,

  • and I like running against people that are weak mentally.

  • I think Joe is the weakest up here.

  • - Really, Donald?

  • You want to compete with a mentally weak loser?

  • Well, then maybe you should hold a debate with a mirror.

  • (crowd cheering)

  • Now, it's no coincidence that Trump

  • is going after the former VP, right?

  • Ever since the polls came out showing Biden

  • beating Trump all over the country,

  • Trump has aimed all of his attacks

  • directly at his number one threat.

  • And Joe Biden is loving it, because it's setting him up

  • as the presumptive nominee.

  • Which is why yesterday in Iowa,

  • he delivered a 40 minute speech that was all about Trump.

  • - I don't think the president really gets the basics.

  • He thinks these tariffs are being paid by China,

  • just like he thinks Mexico is building a wall

  • (crowd laughing)

  • He thinks windmills cause cancer.

  • Now look, you think I'm making this up, I know.

  • Quote, I have complete power.

  • No you don't, Donald Trump.

  • Or, "Only I can fix it."

  • Fix yourself first, Donald Trump.

  • - Oh, okay, that was weird.

  • I feel like Joe Biden turned black

  • by the end of that speech.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • Only I can fix it, no fix yourself Donald Trump.

  • Mike Pence, you better come get your man.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • And I'll be honest, I don't know

  • if this was an effective campaign speech

  • that would convince a swing voter.

  • What I do know is, Joe Biden just got a brand new

  • stand-up special deal on HBO.

  • (upbeat country music)

  • - I don't think the president really gets the basics.

  • He thinks these tariffs are being paid by China,

  • just he thinks Mexico is building a wall.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • (upbeat country music)

  • Then there's President Trump, he denies climate change.

  • What'd he tell Piers Morgan in an interview recently?

  • He said, "Well, weather goes both ways."

  • (crowd laughing)

  • He thinks windmills cause cancer.

  • Now look, you think I'm making this up, I know.

  • He said, those California fires,

  • what they gotta do is rake their leaves.

  • (crowd laughing)

  • I'm not joking, I'm not making this up.

  • - Let's talk about what is looming over

  • the Biden household right now, and that is the campaign.

  • This is your third time.

  • You know how hard it is, you know how taxing it is,

  • you know how invasive it is,

  • you know how vitriolic it is going to be.

  • Are you guys ready for what's about

  • to happen to your lives?

  • - Well, you know, the last two years,

  • people have been coming up to me in the supermarket,

  • and airports, wherever I go and saying,

  • "Your husband has to run, your husband has to run."

  • And we weren't going to run,

  • but then kept hearing this sort of rhythm, this roll.

  • And so we started to think about it.

  • And we called our, well.

  • We called our family together, we spoke to our children.

  • We got our grandchildren all together,

  • and we said, "What do you think?

  • "Do you think pop should run for president?"

  • And to a grandchild, they said, "Pop has to run.

  • "He has to change the direction, and bring people together,

  • "and stop all this vitriol in this country."

  • (crowd applauding) Thank you.

  • (upbeat jazzy music)

- Joe Biden, former vice president

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瞭解拜登|每日秀節目組 (Getting to Know Joe Biden | The Daily Show)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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