Because it comes through you.

那穿過你的身體。

Like something happens and all of a sudden you got an idea.

像是看到了什麼，突然觸動你的想法。

And when those moments strike, it's like religious.

當那些片刻發生時，就像是靈光。

It feels like, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, I just got so lucky.

感覺像是，天啊，我好幸運。

It's a really fortunate, really, really rare thing.

那是真正幸運，十分罕見的事情。

[Kirsten Stewart's career timeline]

[克莉絲汀史都華的演藝生涯]

So "The Thirteenth Year" was a movie that my mom was a script supervisor on.

我媽是電影「第十三年」的劇本監督。

I initially, as a little kid kind of going to set and hanging out with the crew, I would see other children on set and think like, well, what are they doing?

我當時是個小朋友，我會跑去拍片現場找劇組玩，我在現場會看到別的小朋友，我心想：「他們在這裡做什麼？」

I wanna hang out with you guys all the time.

「我想和你們一起玩。」

Why do I have to go back to school?

「為什麼我得回去上學？」

Why do I have to leave?

「為什麼得離開？」

I wanted to be around that energy before I even knew why that energy was appealing to me.

我喜歡那裡的氣氛，我甚至都還不知道為什麼。

I'm standing in line at a water fountain.

我站在飲水機前排隊。

So, yeah, I think I like, lean.

我還有側身。

That's some of my more challenging work actually.

那是我很有難度的電影。

I really loved being there.

我很喜歡待在那裡。

I loved not having to go home and whatever.

我喜歡不用回家之類的。

Being a part of the circus of it all was really fun, but then when the movie came out and a couple of kids at school noticed that I was in it for a second, it was like, not welcome.

那裡很熱鬧，很有趣，然後電影上映了，有幾個學校的小朋友發現我在電影裡，那可不是什麼好事。

I was like, "no, I don't know."

我馬上說：「不，我不知道。」

"My mom, I don't know, whatever."

「那要問我媽，我什麼都不知道。」

But it was trippy.

那有點顧人怨。

I didn't like the conversations that happened afterwards at school being like: "What? But, wait, who are you? What, are you like an actor now?"

後來在學校就有人酸言酸語了，「憑什麼？你誰啊？ 所以你現在是明星了？」

I'm like, "no!"

我都說「不是」。

"Panic Room"

《戰慄空間》

What if they get in here?

萬一他們進來了呢？

No, they can't.

他們無法。

No, they can't, they can't get in here.

他們無法進來這裡。

It's not a possibility, there's no way...

不可能的…

Mom, I heard you.

媽，我聽見了。

"Panic Room"

《戰慄空間》

Jodie Foster threw me a birthday party when I turned 11 with like a mariachi band.

茱蒂佛斯特在我11歲時，請了墨西哥樂隊來為我辦了生日派對。

I never wanted to leave.

我從來就不想離開。

Every time I had to go home because it had been nine hours, I was like, "Why? I'm fine, I can kick it. I can hang, I'm not tired."

每次因為九個小時到了，我得回家時，我都說：「為何？我可以繼續啊，我又不累。」

And everyone was like, "no, it's really for your welfare."

然後大家就會說：「這真的是為你好。」

And I was like, "I'm well, thank you."

我就說「我很好，謝謝。」

"May I stay?"

「我可以留下來嗎？」

In terms of preparation, you kind of acquire as much information as you possibly can, and then you kind of hope that it becomes something physical.

就準備工作來說，你就是得盡可能獲取最多資訊，你會希望那能變成具體的東西。

But I can never get anything up on its feet until it's the word go, until it feels like there's like an honor to the moment and there's a reason why you're doing something as absurd as pretending to be someone else.

但我從未看到任何確切的東西，直到化成文字，直到感覺此刻是榮耀的，且假裝別人這麼荒唐的事情是有道理的。

I had to learn how to have a seizure.

我得學習怎麼演發病。

I remember it scared everyone else so much.

我記得那讓每個人都嚇死了。

Just thinking like, oh, this is very intense for a little kid to do, and watching the videos might be traumatizing for someone that age.

他們覺得那對小孩子太過強烈，看那樣的影片可能造成小孩子的創傷。

I like broke blood vessels in my eyes and just like really.

我像是眼睛充滿血絲什麼的。

I remember it being like, "What? It's cool."

我記得我的反應是：「那很酷啊！」

Now things affect me.

現在對我是有影響。

I'm like sensitive.

我敏銳了。

But when I was little, I was like...

但在當年是我小時候，

"I can do it. No big deal, whatever."

我覺得那又沒什麼。

Yeah, it was a good first taste.

那是很好的初體驗。

It was like not an easy job.

體驗到這行的艱難。

I mean, we had to really like, delve into some heavy stuff, and I turned 11 at that movie.

我們得鑽研很沈重的東西，我在拍那片時滿11歲。

Like that was some formative time.

那是塑造性格的時刻。

My room.

我的房間。

Definitely, my room.

肯定是我的房間。

"Catch That Kid"

《小鬼交鋒》

It was a movie about a little kid who robs a bank to save her dad.

那是在講一個小孩子，為了救她爸爸而搶銀行。

And I was like, gut-wrenchingly obsessed with this. I am!

我真是迷死這劇情了。

Who has the codes to all these?

誰有這裡的密碼？

Oh, they're different from room to room.

哦，每個房間的密碼都不同。

It was my first starring role, but even with a tiny little part on a movie everyone is holding this really precarious bowl of water hoping that not one drop slips, and I felt like I would've done anything for the film.

那是我第一次主演的角色，但就算是電影中的小細節上，大家都兢兢業業，我覺得我可以為這電影付出一切。

"Into the Wild"

《阿拉斯加之死》

Sean Penn attracted me to "Into the Wild".

我拍《阿拉斯加之死》是受到西恩潘吸引。

Actually, initially I went and did a table read for him, and I was really little.

一開時我參加讀劇，我實在是很小咖。

And scared of that.

我很害怕。

I remember thinking like, I told him, you know I'll do anything in the movie.

我記得我跟他說過，我可以為這電影做任何事。

I don't even need to play one of the parts.

我不用有角色也沒關係。

It's awesome that I got to meet you.

能認識你我就夠開心了。

It's awesome that like I was part of the read-through because that in itself felt like it's own animal, like it really stood up and was an experience that I remember.

能參加讀劇就夠開心了，因為讀劇的本身就是很棒的經驗，那就是我所記得的。

So he was like, well, which one would you want to play?

他就說：「你有想演哪個角色嗎？」

I was like, probably the girl who plays guitar.

我說：「也許那個彈吉他的女孩。」

And I played for him, I like, auditioned for it after this read-through and like, couldn't even face him.

在讀劇之後我彈吉他試鏡，我根本不敢面對他。

I was like facing a wall, very badly playing "Blackbird."

我面對著牆，很笨拙地彈著「黑鳥」。

Couldn't sing it.

我不敢唱。

Just speaking of shooting that movie, it was the first time working with anyone that felt so unstructured and so instinctive in terms of capturing the footage.

就那部電影的拍攝來說，那是我第一次見識到，有人這麼隨興，這麼憑直覺去拍攝影片。

We had like a splinter crew almost everywhere we went.

我們幾乎去所有地方都會帶著「二機」。

He threw a camera on his shoulder.

他把攝影機扛在肩上。

Eric Gautier, who's like one of my all-time favorite DPs, also like, was just running, gunning, like.

艾瑞克高帝耶是我最愛的攝影指導，他也是這裡拍拍那裡拍拍。

Like, we didn't know what we were gonna do until we found it.

我們好像不知道要做什麼，直到我們知道為止。

I've heard a lot about that.

那我聽過很多了。

People talk about that all the time, but it doesn't mean they actually have the balls to like, commit to not knowing before they know.

人們經常那樣說，但他們不見得有那種，在未知裡探索的膽識。

Sean is like, a master at that.

西恩可是箇中高手。

Those few days with Emile, and him, and Eric made me want to direct movies. Straight up.

和米爾、他、艾瑞克相處的日子，讓我也好想要執導電影。

Seeing him in the way that he sort of led this charged that was unbridled.

看到他這種像似無影手的風格，我立刻就下了決定。

I was like, yep, absolutely, I would love to do that.

我要加入這電影。

"Twilight"

《暮光之城》

When we did "Twilight", I knew that the fan base was big for the book.

我們在拍《暮光之城》時，我知道粉絲基本上十分喜歡原著。

There was no way of preparing for the response that it had.

我們無法為這樣的反應做準備。

We went to Comicon, and there were so many people there that knew more about the series than I did.

我們去漫畫展，那裡很多人好像比我更懂這系列故事。

-That was kind of the first indication that it was gonna be what it was and. -[The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 2]]

-從那裡似乎就能看出後來的事。 -《暮光之城：破曉 2》

The idea of doing a sequel at that point for me was absurd.

我當時覺得拍系列電影是很荒謬的。

It was weird for me to all of a sudden be asked the question like: "Okay, well, now that we're here, how do we do this right?"

我覺得問我那些問題實在是很怪，像是：「我們拍到這裡了 我們要怎麼把它拍好？」

"How do we capitalize on this basically?"

「我們要怎麼發揚光大？」

Suddenly the chance of kind of like, kick back and go, well, the best experiences I've had on any project of any kind have been when you are naturally and instinctively drawn to a person,

突然間看法變成了，我參與過的所有各種計畫來說，當你自然而然地被一個人吸引。

And there's something that you're both thinking about or meditating on that becomes obsessive and compulsive, you make a movie.

而你們兩人對某些東西有一樣的著迷時，你就能拍電影。

'Cause that's all I know.

因為那就是我所知的。

And so I was at that point like allowed to pick weird things that nobody believed in because I made a big movie once.

所以在那當時，我能挑選沒人相信的奇怪東西，因為我曾經拍過大片。

So, yeah, it definitely kind of blew my head off.

是的，那的確十分讓我驚訝。

Wow, you are really trying to kill me.

哇，你真是很想殺死我。

I thought Em in "Adventureland" was like just the coolest person, and I was so intimidated by her.

我覺得「菜鳥新人王」裡的艾姆是最酷的人，她十分震撼我。

I mean, her name is Em.

她的名字叫艾姆。

It's not even Emily.

甚至不是艾蜜莉。

It's like, okay, you don't even go by your whole name?

就像連全名都可以省了？

Okay, I'm gonna go for a swim.

我要去游泳。

Anybody care to join me?

有人要一起去嗎？

Even if I can't fully relate to a person that I'm playing, we can all understand each other.

儘管我不能完全理解我飾演的人，但我們全都能了解彼此。

Maybe I wouldn't do, say, or act in a certain way or whatever, but I can always find it somewhere embedded.

也許我不會做或演某些層面，但我總能從別的地方表現。

I've never played something where I've not understood the person.

我不會飾演我不懂的人。

"The Runaways"

《蹺家女聲》

Hello?

喂！

Pick up the phone!

接電話！

Joan, please!

瓊恩！

I grew up in Los Angeles.

我在洛杉磯長大。

So I think like we're a huge radio culture.

我們有很深的收音機文化。

I've listen to Joan Jett a lot when I was younger.

我年少時聽很多瓊傑特的歌。

She's so quintessential.

她真是典型。

When I met her to make the movie, it was really crazy 'cause she's like an animal.

我因為拍電影而見到她時，她十分瘋狂，她就像是動物。

She's got barbs and stuff because she's protecting something really precious.

她有尖刺什麼的，因為她要保護很珍貴的東西。

Like she's, you know, leather clad, really driven, like chaotically obsessed with music and cannot stop touring.

她穿皮衣，十分投入，像是對音樂走火入魔一樣，無法停止巡迴。

Even her body, her body is a muscle.

甚至是她的身體，她的身體充滿力量。

It's so reflective of who she is as a person.

那完全反映出她這個人。

She a real live-wire.

她充滿電流。

At our first band rehearsal, we were playing "Cherry Bomb," and I like just wasn't committing to it at all because we weren't shooting.

我們第一次樂團彩排時，我們演唱「櫻桃炸彈」，我完全沒有投入，因為我們當時沒在拍攝。

Why would I fully, fully, fully lean into this when we're not actually here to capture it, you know what I mean?

我們又沒真的要拍攝，我為何要完完全全地投入？

It's just felt like almost like I was traipsing on something or doing a lame impression just for the sake of it.

感覺上我有點失神，或只是做做樣子而已。

I saw her face kind of go like, you know, what the fuck.

我看到她的臉上，就像在說：「什麼鬼啊。」

We'd spent all this time together, and all of a sudden I was like dropping the ball or something.

我們一起花了很多心思，現在好像我搞砸了一樣。

And, she doesn't make movies.

她不是拍電影的。

I don't make music.

我不是做音樂的。

We do different things.

我們的專長不同。

I had to literally, imploringly like, run over and tackle her and be like, yo, trust me.

我真的是直接走過去捏著她說：「你相信我。」

I just don't work like that.

到時候不是那個樣子的。

I just can't do it right now.

這只是彩排。

And she was like, okay.

她就說：「好吧。」

And then we shot it a couple days later.

然後我們在幾天後進行拍攝。

And she was fine, she was happy with what I did, whatever.

她那時就滿意我的表現了。

And it was really cathartic and gnarly to see her watch really formative parts of her life come back to life.

在她面前飾演她的演唱，那真是超級震撼的。

But, yeah, very intimidated.

十分驚恐。

I was like, crying.

我都哭了。

I was like, trust me.

我說，相信我。

I swear to you I can do this.

我發誓我行的。

I think she's happy with it, who knows.

我想她應該也滿意結果吧。

She still talks to me, so.

她還是有和我聯絡，所以…

"Clouds of Sils Maria"

《星光雲寂》

He's here just to see you.

他專程來見你的。

The project doesn't interest me, okay?

我對這計畫不感興趣，好嗎？

He's a great director, just hear him out.

他是個好導演，你聽他說。

You don't have to do it.

你不一定要拍。

He's probably the best of his generation.

他可能是這世代最好的。

I've always felt super allowed to be in environments with the Frenchies.

我總感覺和法國人合作，有很大的發揮空間。

It's funny like even in doing press and having meetings with French filmmakers and working with Olivier now a couple of times, subverting material is their game.

就算是開記者會和法國導演開會，和奧利維耶合作過幾次，他們十分擅長顛覆。

I mean like making something feel alive and in the moment and unplanned and existential and weird, but not holier than thou.

他們擅長表現活在當下、存在且古怪，卻又不是假道學。

There was just this thing where I felt like I could bash my head into a wall trying to figure something out, and that would be the moment, rather than going like: "Why haven't you completed a perfect sentence?"

有些事情是會讓我想到肝腦塗地的，那才是真實的，而不是說：「你何不就好好講完句子就好？」

I was like, no, of course this is beautiful.

就像是說，那很美。

You let her do what she's gonna do.

你就讓她自由發揮。

Its like, yes, that's what we're all trying to do.

是的，我們全部人都想那樣。

I'm a huge fan of Olivier.

我是奧利維耶的大粉絲。

I'm gonna be honest and say I don't think I would've said no really to anything.

我坦白說我覺得我不會拒絕他任何事。

It meant most for me to win that award for Olivier because he is one of... like, just one of the most brilliant artists working, and I love him.

為奧利維耶贏那個獎最我意義最大，因為他是我合作過最傑出的藝術家，我愛他。

You have your interpretation of the play.

你對演戲有自己的看法。

I think mine's just confusing you.

我的看法可能混淆你了。

"Personal Shopper"

《私人採購》

What are you waiting for?

你在等什麼？

So we made this oath.

我們發過誓。

Whoever died first would send the other a sign.

先死的那個人要給另一個人暗示。

A sign?

暗示？

From the afterlife?

從來世來的？

You could call it that.

你可以那樣說。

You could call it a million things.

你想怎樣說都行。

In "Personal Shopper" I played somebody who's lost her other half, basically.

我在「私人採購」中 飾演一位失去摯愛的人。

A girl who has a twin loses her brother, and loses herself so completely that, you know, black and white and hot and cold and the words that you use to communicate to others just become shape and color, and like, literally nothing makes sense to you at all.

這個女孩的雙胞胎哥哥去世了，因此她脫離了黑白、冷熱、那些你和別人溝通的文字，那有形有色的世界，那完全都沒有意義。

Going into the movie, I wasn't super obsessed with that part of it.

看電影時，我對那部分並非特別著迷。

I kind of only realized in retrospect having watched the movie what a thing that was.

我只是在回想電影時想到那點。

And my entire goal as an actor is to be as prepared or sort of knowledgeable as you can possibly be in order to be so subject something that you feel like the lack of control is really exhilarating.

我身為演員的大目標就是盡可能充實自己，才能在遇到你缺乏掌控的情形時，仍舊遊刃有餘。

I've had some experiences that have rocked me to the point where I felt like I didn't know my name, so I could bring that to it.

我有過一些渾然忘我的經驗，所以我回想不起來。

But at the same time, I don't really know what's going on all the time.

但同時，我也是不太清楚到底怎麼回事。

Whenever I watch a film that I've acted in, as much as I try and like, control stuff or ask a million questions or like live in the director's front pocket, if I've done my job correctly, I shouldn't really even know like, what the movie's about.

我看我演的電影，我都盡可能掌控一切，不斷地問問題，或是不斷和導演討論，如果我把我的工作做好了，我甚至不用知道電影在講什麼。

You don't need to feel guilty.

你不用自責。

Laura deserves to be happy.

蘿拉值得開心。

And you do too.

你也是。

”"Come Swim"

《Come Swim》

I knew that I wanted to direct movies before I had anything to direct.

我還沒執導過時就知道我想執導電影。

And that was really frustrating for a long time 'cause like I had this awareness of the desire, but like nowhere to put it.

我為那點沮喪了很久，因為我知道這渴望，卻無法解決。

I was just fixated on this image of like a chair on the bottom of the ocean.

我一直念念不忘這個影像，一把椅子在海底。

Like a chair from a classroom, and it was so.

一把教室的椅子。

Like, that chair didn't belong there, and it was really scary for that chair to be there.

那椅子不屬於那裡，那椅子很害怕待在那裡。

I started thinking about capturing that image and why I was so fixated on it.

我想要捕捉那個讓我念念不忘的影像。

God, like with writing, directing, anything, I think like, I did grow up to realize that you don't need to be smarter than other people, that you don't need to know things that people don't know.

在寫作及執導的過程中，我想我成長了，明白你不一定要比別人聰明，你不一定要知道別人不知道的東西。

You're not like providing a syllabus to life.

你不是要寫人生的教學大綱。

It's really more of just a personal experience to try and like bridge this gap between us, where you go: "Gosh, I've had this idea, and I wanna say it really loudly to see how many people feel that way so we can be less alone."

那其實不過就像是建造一座橋樑，像是說我有這個想法，我想把它大聲說出來，看看能引起多少人的共鳴，好讓我們不那麼孤單。

That's why you make movies, you know.

那就是為什麼我要拍電影。