that Democrats began to lay out

their case against the president.

But, last night, fights were already breaking out

about whether this trial should even be happening

in the first place.

Opening arguments begin early this afternoon,

and we're expecting a very fierce debate

over why the president should

and shouldn't be removed from office.

Republicans want this all over

by the State of the Union address in two weeks.

Democrats say, "Not so fast."

Why are we here?

Are we here because of a phone call?

We are here, sir, to follow the facts,

apply the law,

be guided by the Constitution

and present the truth to the American people.

That is why we are here, Mr. Sekulow.

And if you don't know,

now you know.

-Oh...! -(cheering and applause)

♪ And if you don't know, now you know! ♪

That's right. That's right.

Congressman Hakeem Jeffries just quoted Biggie

on the floor of Congress.

The only thing, the only thing I wish

is that he'd used the entire line.

That would have been amazing. He was like,

"If you don't know, now you know, nigga!"

Because if that happened,

black people would have been out celebrating in the streets.

It would have been MLK Day part two.

All of a sudden, they're like... ♪ You know very well ♪

♪ Who you are! ♪

But I got to say, man, hip-hop has come a long way.

Think about it. In the '80s and '90s,

it was considered gangster music,

and now it's being quoted in an impeachment trial, huh?

That's how far hip-hop has come.

-(cheering and applause) -Think about that.

That's insane.

Hip-hop just keeps going. I bet it's only a matter of time

before, like, Mitch McConnell responds

with a rap lyric of his own.

Just like... ♪ Mah, my name is Mitch and I don't have a jaw ♪

♪ I love the Senate and saying "mah." ♪

Now, now, the reason things got so heated yesterday

is because Democrats tried ten different times

to get new witnesses and evidence

into this impeachment trial,

and the Republicans shot them down each and every time.

There hasn't been that much rejection in D.C.

since Stephen Miller went speed dating.

Now, one of the main witnesses Democrats really hope

will testify is former Trump advisor

and grumpy Cap'n Crunch John Bolton.

But when the president was asked about it this morning,

he had a list of reasons why he doesn't want Bolton to testify.

The problem with John

is that it's a national security problem.

You know? You can't have somebody

who's at National Security.

And, uh, if you think about it, John,

he knows some of my thoughts.

He knows what I think about leaders.

What happens if he reveals what I think

about a certain leader and it's not very positive

and then I have to deal on behalf of the country?

It's gonna be very hard.

It's gonna make the job very hard.

Uh, he knows other things.

And, uh, I don't know if we left on the best of terms.

I would say probably not.

You know, you know,

one thing I enjoy about Trump is that he will give you

every excuse all at the same time.

Right? He'll start with the fake excuse,

but then he'll just keep going until you learn the real reason.

Just like, "Sadly, we can't hear from Bolton

"because it's a national security threat.

"And, also, he'll reveal what I think about other world leaders.

"And, also, he hates my guts.

And, also, he'll implicate me in the crimes that I committed."

(applause)

"So many reasons."

(cheering)

Because-- let's be real, let's be real--

I don't think it's a big deal if Bolton reveals

what Trump thinks of other world leaders.

Because Trump already tells everyone

what he thinks of world leaders.

He'll even do it while they're standing right next to him.

He'd be with Macron like, "I just had

"a very productive meeting with this little French bitch

over here."

So, Bolton may or may not appear at Trump's impeachment trial.

But even if he does, even if he appears,

there's a good chance that the senators won't hear

what he's saying at all.

Because, based on yesterday,

half of them are already checked out.

REPORTER: At least seven senators were spotted Tuesday

wearing Apple Watches. That's a no-no.

Rand Paul played a crossword puzzle.

A big no-no.

Shortly after 5:30 p.m.,

Senator James Risch, the Republican of Idaho,

could be seen motionless, eyes closed

and head slumping against his right hand.

Risch was the first lawmaker seen

by Washington Post reporters to have clearly fallen asleep.

It's a bit like a college lecture hall.

Some of them are busily taking notes.

Some of them look bored out of their minds.

And if they're thirsty, we're told that only two beverages

are allowed on the Senate floor, water and milk.

Yeah. Some senators are playing with their Apple Watches,

others are solving crosswords

and, worst of all, a senator from Idaho fell asleep.

Like asleep-asleep.

'Cause you know you've been sleeping for a long time

when an artist has time to sketch your portrait.

That's sleep.

But I'll be honest,

I get why some of these senators are struggling.

They're sitting there for long hours, up to 12 hours,

late into the night, and they're only allowed

to drink milk or water to stay energized?

That's a tough situation.

I mean, it was a tough situation,

because, luckily, there's a new product out

that could help them out.

ANNOUNCER: When you're stuck on the Senate floor

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But you're only allowed to drink milk.

You have no options.

-Until now. -(lightning crashes)

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It's the only milk fortified with caffeine,

amphetamines

and just a little bit of cocaine.

-So you can get your impeach on -(sighs)

and fulfill your constitutional duties to the max.

-(bleep) yeah! -Ready to impeach!

With Impeachmilk, you'll have the energy

to render judgment all night long.

So get some Impeachmilk

and get jacked up on justice.

Desi Lydic and Roy Wood, Jr., everybody.