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  • -Hey, guys, whenever I need a pick-me-up,

  • I go to my main source of spiritual strength --

  • inspirational quotes posted on Instagram.

  • So it's time for "#blessed, #inspired."

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -#Blessed, #inspired.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Our first inspirational quote is,

  • "Love thy neighbor as thyself.

  • Especially if thy neighbor has Netflix

  • thou art secretly stealing."

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • How about this morsel?

  • [ Laughter ] -Oh.

  • -"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

  • But if you keep grabbing birds,

  • you're definitely gonna get banned from the zoo again."

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • You don't want to be banned from the zoo again.

  • -Again. -Here's a treasure.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • "Each day provides its own gifts.

  • Like last Tuesday when you saw Kevin from accounting

  • rollerblading to work and totally biff it."

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • You shouldn't -- You shouldn't laugh at that!

  • This is a little blessing.

  • [ Laughter ] -Oh.

  • -"The only thing holding you back is your imagination.

  • Unless your name is Dirk.

  • Then that's probably holding you back, too.

  • Sorry, Dirk."

  • [ Applause ]

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Here's a spot of light. [ Laughter ]

  • "Fall seven times, get up eight.

  • And then maybe think about laying off

  • the vodka for a while.

  • It's 5:00 p.m., bro!

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • [ Bell rings ]

  • [ Laughter ]

  • And now another touch of inspiration.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • "If you're feeling overwhelmed,

  • sometimes you just need to sit down and take a deep breath.

  • You'll still be overwhelmed,

  • but at least you're sitting down now."

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • Here's a make-believe taste of granola.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • "It's never too late to do the right thing.

  • But keep in mind that the Taco Bell drive-in

  • closes at 1:00 a.m. on weekdays."

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • -Oh. -Make good choices.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • We're down to our last gentle, little nugget.

  • -Oh. [ Laughter ]

  • Ew, gross.

  • -"Creativity is contagious, so put yourself out there.

  • But the coronavirus is also contagious,

  • so on second thought, maybe stay inside for a while."

  • That's all the time we have for "#blessed, #inspired."

  • Stick around.

  • We'll be right back with more "Tonight Show."

-Hey, guys, whenever I need a pick-me-up,

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#受祝福#受啟發。愛你的鄰居就像愛你自己 (#Blessed #Inspired: Love Thy Neighbor as Thyself)

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    林宜悉 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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