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  • [THE SPIDER chitters in the distance. Otherworldly music continues to play.]

  • [Panting and tapping as NOAH rushes down the BOARDWALK.]

  • NOAH: You're not gonna catch me!

  • [Chittering continues.]

  • NOAH: You gotta be quicker than that. You gotta caaaatch me.

  • I'm quicker than them!

  • [Screeching.]

  • [Chittering.]

  • NOAH: You're gonna be so surprised when I fuckin' get outta here!

  • [Loud, shrill screech.]

  • [Chittering.]

  • [Screeching.] NOAH: I don't need anyone's help!

  • Not even my own!

  • NOAH (frantically): I can do this! I can fucking do this!

  • NOAH (yelling): Come at me! Come at me, you fuckers!

  • NOAH: What are you waitin' for, huh?!

  • NOAH: I'm HERE!

  • NOAH: TAKE me!

  • NOAH: SPOOK me!

  • NOAH: Make me your bitch, I DARE you!

  • [Panting, NOAH shuffles forward.]

  • NOAH: Huh?

  • NOAH (out of breath): What?

  • No!

  • [THE SPIDER screeches.]

  • No!

  • [Silence.]

  • [Otherworldly, slow music. Bugs chittering in the background.]

  • [Music and bugs continue. A bird chirps in the distance.]

  • [Rattling as NOAH rolls the HUNDRED-SIDED DIE.]

  • NOAH: 96...

  • [Rattling; NOAH rolls again.]

  • 79... [NOAH rolls again.]

  • NOAH (whispering): Come on...

  • NOAH (growing frustrated): 32! [NOAH rolls again.]

  • NOAH: (angrily, through his teeth): 32 AGAIN!

  • [NOAH loses control of the HUNDRED-SIDED DIE.]

  • Rrrgh!

  • Dammit!

  • [NOAH rolls once more.]

  • NOAH (hopefully): 4!

  • NOAH (whispering): So close!

  • Maybe... Maybe I can...

  • [Clattering.]

  • NOAH: (whispering): Shit!

  • NOAH (exasperated): Oh, fuck my life!

  • [CAR KEYS jangling.]

  • NOAH (desperately): Where is it?

  • [A single click.]

  • [Jangling.] Where's the beep?

  • NOAH: Where is it?

  • [NOAH continuously clicks the remote.]

  • [Clicking.] The beep, where is it?

  • [Clicking.]

  • [Clicking.] NOAH (whimpering): I don't hear it anymore!

  • [Jangling, clicking.] NOAH (whimpering): -place like home. There's no place like home. There's no place like home. There's no place like home.

  • [Jangling, clicking] There's no place like home. There's no-

  • NOAH: Really?!

  • ["You will never find the journal."]

  • NOAH (angrily): I tell you, the novelty's really wearin' off!

  • [NOAH snickers.]

  • ["☺"]

  • [NOAH continues to snicker.]

  • NOAH (sarcastically, shrilly): So cute!

  • Ooh, I am LOVIN' this!

  • [Crunching as NOAH consumes leaves.]

  • NOAH: Mmhm! Mmm!

  • [NOAH continues to consume the leaves. Distorted music.]

  • [Silence.]

  • [Music. A strange stalk omits a strange noise.]

  • NOAH (whispering, horrified): What... in the fuck... is that?!

  • [Unintelligible chattering picks up nearby.]

  • NOAH: Huh?

  • [A group of unfamiliar people talking.]

  • NOAH: No!

  • [NOAH coughs roughly. The chatter continues.]

  • NOAH: Hey!

  • Fuck!

  • NOAH (more frantically): Fuck!

  • NOAH: Hey!

  • NOAH (yelling): YOU GUYS, HEY!

  • [THE SPIDER screeches.]

  • OVER HERE!

  • [Screeching.]

  • [Screeching.] NOAH (screaming): WAAAAIT!!

  • [Screeching continues.]

  • WAAI--

  • [Silence.]

  • [Music.]

  • [Audio distortion.]

  • NOAH: Come on, not again.

  • [NOAH smacks the camera.]

  • [Audio distortion.]

  • NOAH: Come on.

  • [Clicking.]

  • [Clicking.] NOAH (whispering): Shit.

  • [Clicking continues.]

  • [Clicking.] NOAH (whispering, frustrated): Come on!

  • [Audio distortion.]

  • NOAH: Ugh!

  • [NOAH clears his throat.]

  • [NOAH spits.]

  • [Audio distortion.]

  • NOAH: Shit.

  • [NOAH smacks the camera again.]

  • [Clicking.]

  • [Clicking, audio distortion.] NOAH: Come on!

  • [Clicking, audio distortion.]

  • [Clicking. THE ADMINISTRATOR appears, growling.]

  • NOAH (surprised): What the fuck...?

  • NOAH (defiantly): Yeah, good one!

  • Real scary!

  • [Clicking.]

  • [Clicking.] Stupid motherfuckers!

  • [Clicking continues.]

  • [High pitched giggling.]

  • NOAH (surprised): What the fuck?

  • [Audio distortion, music.]

  • [NOAH coughs.]

  • [Clicking as NOAH continues to switch the nightvision on and off. Music.]

  • NOAH: Fuck.

  • [Clicking continues.]

  • [Sinister laughter.]

  • [Sinister laughter continues. KEVIN appears, stomping forward. Heavy audio distortion.]

  • [NOAH grunts as he is tackled by KEVIN. The camera falls to the ground.]

  • [Audio distortion.]

  • NOAH (angrily): God DAMN it!

  • [Scratching as NOAH picks the camera up.]

  • NOAH: Urgh!

  • [NOAH grunts.]

  • NOAH (yelling): What are you, tryin' out for the FOOTBALL TEAM?!

  • [NOAH grunts in pain.]

  • NOAH: Shit!

  • NOAH (in pain): Ah, fuck!

  • [Giggling.] KEVIN: Yoo hoo!

  • [Maniacal giggling. NOAH startles.]

  • KEVIN: Hi, buddy!

  • [KEVIN laughs maniacally as NOAH runs away.]

  • [Silence.]

  • [Music.]

  • [Shuffling as NOAH fumbles with the camera.]

  • [Music continues.]

  • NOAH (whispering to himself): If I was a god-demon from the future...

  • NOAH: Hmm.

  • NOAH: I wonder...

  • NOAH: Oh shit.

  • [NOAH fumbles with the camera.]

  • ["Enjoy the small things you find on your path."]

  • [Scraping as NOAH pulls out a packaged band-aid.]

  • [NOAH quietly laughs.]

  • [Crinkling.]

  • NOAH: Alright, I'll take it!

  • [Camera shuffling.]

  • [NOAH opens the package.]

  • [Crinkling.] NOAH: Merry FUCKING Christmas.

  • [Crinkling as NOAH places the bandage.]

  • [Camera shuffling.]

  • NOAH (whimpering): Just like new.

  • Heheh...

  • [Music has quieted somewhat, replaced by a watery, quiet growling.]

  • [Music picks back up in volume.]

  • [Shuffling as NOAH sets the camera down. Watery, demonic moaning as THE SPIDER creeps into the swamp.]

  • [Shuffling as NOAH picks the camera back up.]

  • [Skittering as NOAH rushes down the BOARDWALK.]

  • NOAH: Is that a fortune?

  • Just a fuckin' leaf!

  • [Skittering.]

  • [NOAH pants.]

  • NOAH (exasperated): Shit!

  • [Panting.]

  • Where do I go?

  • [Panting.]

  • NOAH: Fuck!

  • [Panting.]

  • [Silence.]

  • NOAH (sarcastically): Ooh boy, I wonder what THIS one says.

  • [A piercing whistle sounds from the distance.]

  • NOAH: Huh?

  • NOAH: Oh no...

  • KEVIN: Hey Noah, I got somethin' to show ya!

  • NOAH: Oh, shit!

  • [Growling from behind.]

  • NOAH: No!

  • [THE ADMINISTRATOR appears, accompanied by distorted ringing.]

  • NOAH: Fuuuuuck!

  • [Ringing continues.]

  • KEVIN: Trust me, you're gonna love it!

  • NOAH: Oh, fuck this!

  • [NOAH begins to panic. The ringing rapidly builds.]

  • [THE SPIDER screeches. KEVIN/THE OBSERVER lets out a piercing, demonic laugh.]

  • [NOAH shrieks. THE SPIDER's screeching becomes louder.]

  • NOAH (frantically): No, no, no, no, no, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!!

  • [Quiet music.]

  • NOAH: What the...

  • [NOAH coughs.]

  • NOAH: Oh, I know this place.

  • I haven't been here in years...

  • Even in hell, it's still closed.

  • [Audio skipping, distortion.]

  • ["Stay in Wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit-hole goes."]

  • [Audio skipping as visuals distort heavily.]

  • NOAH (whispering): Okay...

  • [Audio skipping.] NOAH: I...

  • am going...

  • to try...

  • [Audio skipping.] and get past-

  • FUTURE NOAH: Hey there, buddy. Have a seat, we gotta talk.

  • NOAH: Oh, hell no! Not this shit again!

  • FUTURE NOAH: Have a seat! We have to have a conversation right now.

  • NOAH (yelling): No, FUCK you!

  • And I ain't your buddy!

  • NOAH: Y-you and your freak show back there can SUCK MY ASS!

  • You're not me! You're just a DOPPELGANGER!

  • FUTURE NOAH: Take out the die.

  • NOAH: What?

  • FUTURE NOAH (exasperated): Take out the fucking die and roll it.

  • NOAH (sarcastically): Pfft, sure. Here you go.

  • [Clattering.] FUTURE NOAH: You're gonna roll a 72.

  • NOAH: Uh...

  • NOAH: Wow, that's impressive.

  • NOAH (sarcastically): Do you do children's birthday parties?

  • [MILO'S JOURNAL snickers.]

  • FUTURE NOAH: I want you to have this back. It's a good read.

  • NOAH: Oh, shit! [Audio skipping.]

  • MILO'S JOURNAL: Hello again, Noah. I missed you.

  • FUTURE NOAH (sharply): Now, if you don't sit down, and SPEAK to me,

  • then you're gonna be STUCK here forever.

  • So put that camera down, and let's talk.

  • NOAH (angrily): Like I have a choice!

  • NOAH: I'm literally gonna be sitting beside myself.

  • My life is a joke and I'm a walking punchline.

  • [Brief, heavy audio distortion.]

  • FUTURE NOAH: I don't even get a thank you?

  • NOAH (sighing): THANK you.

  • FUTURE NOAH: You are SUCH an asshole.

  • NOAH: Sorry, I've just been...

  • FUTURE NOAH: Through hell?

  • Yeah, been there. Still there, really.

  • NOAH: Where are we?

  • FUTURE NOAH (snidely): A room? What does it look like?

  • [FUTURE NOAH sighs.]

  • FUTURE NOAH: Sorry, excuse me.

  • Uh, it's a small recess that I've been given to have this very conversation with you.

  • NOAH: So...we don't get out?

  • FUTURE NOAH: No, we do,

  • it's just that... it ain't the last time you come.

  • FUTURE NOAH: You see, after we get Sebastian's journal,

  • and we get it on our terms,

  • they get royally pissed.

  • FUTURE NOAH: And we get plunged into this...

  • state of perpetual darkness.

  • the, uh, "dark times", he likes to call it that.

  • NOAH: How far in the future are you?

  • [FUTURE NOAH sighs.]

  • FUTURE NOAH: Not as far as the first, uh, guy you met.

  • I've been here for... around a month?

  • Uh, just in case you haven't been keeping track, you've been here for about a week now.

  • Um, that OTHER Noah?

  • Uh, he's been here... quite a while.

  • Um...

  • Yeah, um, not really sure.

  • We've met a few times. It wasn't pleasant.

  • [FUTURE NOAH sighs.]

  • Nothing's ever pleasant in here.

  • NOAH: What is this place?

  • FUTURE NOAH: This...

  • This is where the monsters live.