service.

Good morning, Canada Revenue Agency.

CRA, how can I help you?

Why have you disturbed my slumber?

I will eat your soul for breakfast, puny mortal.

You can expect first class treatment from each of our highly trained agents.

Well your payment is a day late but there's no penalty for that.

Your audit is complete, and we actually owe YOU money.

I will chain you to a molten pillar of brimstone and scourge you with flames until your pitiful

screams echo through the underworld for all of eternity.

Mondays, am I right?

And you can count on excellent service no matter where you live.

Postal code please.

Oh Hamilton, how nice.

Where are you calling from?

Rosedale.

Please hold.

Oops.

Tell me where you live human scum.

Sault Ste. Marie.

I know it well.

I've got a winter home there.

The Canada Revenue Agency.

You don't have to be a demon from hell to work here, but it helps.