The older we get the harder it is to not only make but keep friends close to our side.
And sometimes the people we least expect to let us down are those who hurt us the most.
Has your friend changed into someone you no longer recognize?
Do you feel more burdened instead of fulfilled in some of your friendships?
Here are 10 signs you may have a toxic friend.
1. You feel like you can't be your true self when you're with them.
Friendships exist so you can grow familiar and comfortable with someone.
But if they pressure you to do things you don't want to or begin to judge you for the new hobbies you develop perhaps it's time to think about where your friendship is going.
A real friend is someone you can be yourself with without fearing that they won't accept you.
2. Your communication becomes almost nonexistent.
Do they often ghost you or put minimum effort and communication?
If it's always you texting or calling them first, you might want to ask yourself why it's always you initiating plans.
Sometimes life gets busy and people may not be able to hang out with each other as much when they move, get new jobs or enter new relationships.
But if they only seem to hang out with you when the original plans have been canceled, or just to kill time before they ditch you to hang out with others, they may only be using you for their own convenience.
3. They constantly smother you!
A toxic friend can also swing the other way and try to cross over any healthy boundaries you set for yourself.
If they want to spend every minute every day with you but get jealous when you want to hang out with your other friends, family or lover, then they aren't being respectful towards you.
A healthy friendship needs balance in order to sustain.
Even if the two of you are best friends, too much of anything is bad for you and can be emotionally draining.
4. You feel like you guys are competing against one another.
Are they constantly trying to one-up you?
If they can't be happy for your success, it's best to take a step back and figure out where their jealousy issues stem from.
Friendship is built on the foundation of compassion and selflessness.
If their competitive streak takes over, they might only have wanted to get closer to you to be frienemies.
5. They aren't considerate of your feelings.
Sometimes you feel like you can trust them.
Other times they say a comment that takes a jab at you and it makes you wonder what they really meant by it.
There's a difference between friendly sarcasm and mean remarks that teeter over the edge of bullying.
6. They give you a hard time for your mistakes even when you apologize.
If they constantly bring up the past and only focus on what you've done wrong, then perhaps it's time to move forward without them.
Friendships can only sustain if the two of you can grow together.
But if they seem to hold you back and refuse to let go of their grudges, then this will only work against your friendship instead of supporting it.
7. They are controlling and try to micromanage you rather than give you advice.
A good friend is there for you during the tough times.
But if your friend tries to fix you and wants to make decisions for you instead of giving you advice, then they are treating you more like a project rather than a friend.
Even if they're coming from a good place and only want what's best for you, they can't live your life for you.
8. Your friendship provides more stress than support.
Do you feel overwhelmed, neglected or unhappy?
If you feel like you're still testing your friend to see if you can trust them, then chances are your friendship isn't solidifying.
Although friendships take work and effort, they shouldn't always be stressful.
The whole point of having a good friend is being able to have fun together without trying too hard.
9. You frequently catch them talking about you behind your back.
It's normal to seek advice from people outside of your conflicting relationship.
And when we're angry or sad, sometimes we might say things about others that we don't always mean out of frustration, but a toxic friend may gossip behind your back just because they find it satisfying or entertaining.
If you confront them about it and they continue to do it, this will only hurt you in the long run.
10. You forget why the two of you became friends in the first place.
Do you feel like your friendship is coming to an end?
It's not fun losing friends but it's better to let go, move on, and find people who accept you for who you are, instead of putting effort in a friendship that will never work.
Maybe at one point you guys really were friends, but those days are long gone.
Appreciate the memories you made, and make new ones with people who are willing to be there for you.
Do you believe you have a toxic friend?
Please share your thoughts with us below!
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