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  • (Strong Music)

  • - [Dan Lok] Write this down: Stage time equals wealth time.

  • Stage time equals wealth time.

  • Every single time I get an opportunity to be on stage,

  • I cherish it because stage time equals what?

  • - [audience] Wealth time.

  • - [Dan] Why do you want to master public speaking?

  • Because of one word: leverage.

  • Whatever you're doing now, if you're selling one-on-one,

  • that's how much leverage you have.

  • That's the ratio.

  • You're restricted by, cause think, as I always say,

  • money earners are by-products of value creation.

  • You want to deliver a lot of value,

  • how can you be more efficient?

  • How can you deliver more value

  • to more people at the same time?

  • One-to-one, that's fine, but one-to-ten?

  • One-to-twenty?

  • One-to-fifty?

  • One-to-a hundred?

  • One-to-one thousand?

  • That's leverage.

  • So, by mastering this skill,

  • the skill of public speaking, yes,

  • your earning ability goes up.

  • Does that make sense?

  • Think of people, that,

  • how many of you actually have a little bit of,

  • you're afraid of public speaking?

  • Be honest, it's okay.

  • You're afraid of it.

  • My question is, how many opportunities have you missed out?

  • Because you didn't take the time to build the skill.

  • And imagine, if you actually have the skill,

  • how much more money you would have made.

  • How many more opportunities you

  • would have taken advantage of.

  • And for those of you who are pretty good,

  • you're like, you know, I'm not afraid,

  • but let's say your skill is okay,

  • but what if your skills are actually exceptional?

  • How much more money?

  • How much more success you would have?

  • Does that make sense?

  • - [audience] Yeah.

  • - [Dan] So, stage time equals wealth time.

  • So, let me give you some tips

  • on how to overcome stage fright.

  • How many of you get nervous before you go up to the stage?

  • Can I see a show of hands?

  • Before you go, how do you feel?

  • Just yell the answer.

  • How do you feel?

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Okay, stomach like, uggggh.

  • Okay, wanna throw up, okay, yes?

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Huh, anxious?

  • Okay, yes.

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Little voice saying, "Nobody wants to hear you."

  • Okay, that's awesome, yeah.

  • By the way, I have the same fear

  • every time I do a meet up.

  • Every time I show up early at 5:00,

  • you know, my team is here,

  • seriously, my little voice,

  • "I wonder if you were going to show up."

  • And then about, you know, 30 minutes later,

  • people start coming in, I'm like,

  • phew, that's a little bit better, right?

  • And after 45 minutes, oh, you know,

  • people are sitting down, at 50-60% packed.

  • Oh, people actually showed up, good.

  • I still have the same fear, I do.

  • It's not like, "oh, yeah, people are going to show up."

  • No, no, no, it's not like that,

  • I have the same fear, that little voice.

  • Same thing.

  • What else? Yes.

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Worry you're going to forget something.

  • The point of the thing, the thing you want to communicate,

  • the point of what you want to say, yes!

  • What else?

  • Last one, give me one.

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Worry you talk too much.

  • And you do talk too much, by the way.

  • [audience laughing]

  • Listening, right?

  • The listening, I was sharing that with you.

  • What else?

  • How else do you feel?

  • Dev, give me one!

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Huh?

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Oh, don't like people looking at you.

  • Okay, don't like people looking at you.

  • Now, let me, first of all, here's what doesn't work.

  • The typical advice, people tell you that,

  • you know, you want to picture your audience

  • and they're naked or in their underwear.

  • [audience laughing]

  • How many of you have heard of that?

  • All right, okay, now.

  • Depends on who you're speaking to,

  • it could either be too exciting or too terrifying.

  • Both are not good, okay?

  • No, don't picture your audience in their underwear

  • or naked, it's not good, okay?

  • And it's not like, oh, you know, you want to drink

  • your green tea before, or you want to meditate.

  • No, no, no, I'm not talking about that.

  • So, let me give you three, how many?

  • - [audience] Three!

  • - [Dan] Quick mental fixes.

  • What I personally do.

  • What I personally do.

  • Now, nowadays when I go up to the stage,

  • I don't get nervous any more.

  • Not one bit.

  • Not like even a little bit, none.

  • And I'll share with you why.

  • So, three quick mental fixes to deal with stage fright.

  • Number one: focus on the audience, not yourself.

  • If you feel anxious, if you feel anxiety,

  • if you don't like people looking at you,

  • if you're afraid you're going to say the wrong things,

  • you're afraid you don't sound smart enough,

  • you're afraid that nobody's going to show up,

  • you're afraid that nobody's going to listen to you,

  • or you're going to offend somebody,

  • all this stuff is what?

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] Yeah, it's about you.

  • It's all internal.

  • Do I look good?

  • Do I sound smart?

  • What are they going to think of me?

  • Are they going to like me?

  • It's all me, me, me, me, does that make sense?

  • Yeah, so stop being so selfish!

  • Don't be so selfish.

  • Focus on the audience.

  • Think, if your focus is external,

  • if, this is why I don't get nervous any more,

  • here's why I don't have a music stand.

  • Because I don't care if I say everything

  • that was meant to say, it was said perfectly,

  • that's not important for me.

  • Looking good is not important for me.

  • 'Cause I focus on the audience.

  • That's it.

  • My focus is external.

  • Are you getting value?

  • Are you walking away with value?

  • That is it.

  • I don't give a fuck if you like me or not.

  • I truly do not care.

  • I truly do not care.

  • 'Cause it's not my job!

  • My job is to teach and to help you grow.

  • If you like me, that's nice,

  • you might resonate with the message a little bit more,

  • but that's not what I'm here for.

  • That's not what I'm here for.

  • So when "them" is out of the way,

  • then why would I be nervous?

  • When my focus is not internal?

  • All this stuff, all the fear, all the anxiety,

  • it's you-you, me-me-me-me-me-me.

  • Kick that out of the way and just focus on

  • "What can I give?"

  • "What kind of value can I deliver?"

  • That's it.

  • Focus on that, the fear disappears.

  • It's all gone.

  • You want to feel nervous, you won't.

  • Because it doesn't matter.

  • And that's why I break all the rules.

  • You know, in public speaking, Toastmasters.

  • You know, hands, don't put them in your pockets,

  • you're not supposed to use profanity,

  • you're not supposed to do this,

  • all these rules, I don't give a damn about those rules.

  • My rules are: Am I delivering value?

  • Am I being effective?

  • Am I being an effective communicator?

  • And is my message getting through?

  • If it is, I keep doing it.

  • If it doesn't work, the audience, then I will know.

  • Then I will stop doing it.

  • Everything else, I do not care.

  • This is all noise.

  • Does that make sense?

  • - [audience] Yes.

  • - [Dan] Yeah, so, don't focus on yourself,

  • focus on the audience.

  • Focus on the audience.

  • What's the objective?

  • Why are you even there?

  • Why, what gives you the right to be on the stage?

  • What are you there to do?

  • If that is clear, everything else is easy.

  • Yes?

  • - [audience] Yes.

  • - [Dan] So, this little ritual that I go through myself.

  • Now, every time, how many of you have been with me

  • more than three, six months?

  • Yeah.

  • Okay, you notice, every time before we start,

  • where am I?

  • - [audience members speaking]

  • - [Dan] I'm in that room, usually.

  • That's, I call it my green room.

  • I'm not here socializing,

  • not that I don't want to socialize.

  • Afterwards, you can ask questions,

  • I will socialize all you want.

  • But before that, I need some me time.

  • What do I need?

  • - [audience] Me time.

  • - [Dan] I need some me time to focus.

  • So, let me share with you my ritual, yeah?

  • What I go through.

  • So, in that room, and this is like, pretty private stuff.

  • But I'll share that with you.

  • So, in that room, what I go through, I go through

  • a couple of things.

  • First of all, in order to not focus on myself,

  • to focus on the audience,

  • I will do a very quick visualization exercise.

  • And here's what I visualize: I close my eyes,

  • I will do it like that,

  • and I will visualize a big bright white light,

  • beaming from the sky, to me, through here,

  • through my forehead, my hair,

  • through my whole body,

  • so I become a big, bright, white light.

  • From there, then I visualize from this bright light

  • and it will get brighter and brighter and brighter,

  • and it will shhhhhhh fill the whole room.

  • That's what I visualize, it will fill the whole room.

  • And in my mind, my intention is,

  • I'm going to make sure everyone

  • who comes to my presentation, to my workshop, my speech,

  • every single person is going to walk away

  • with some kind of value.

  • Even though they might not agree with my message,

  • even though they might not like me so much,

  • but I guarantee, my job, my intention is,

  • they're going to walk away with some kind of value.

  • That's it.

  • See how that shifted all the focus off of me?

  • And just focus on the audience.

  • Once I've done that, now you can see,

  • I don't know if you can see it.

  • After just a few seconds of that,