If your roommate sent you this video,

如果你的室友將這支影片傳給你

they're concerned that you may not know

他們擔心你或許不知道

how to get off your ass and wash a goddamn

在你可悲的生命裡，要如何動起來

dish for once in your pathetic life.

將該死的餐具清洗乾淨。

Don't worry, washing even one fucking dish isn't that hard.

不用擔心，就算只是洗一個該死的盤子也不是什麼難事。

It's so easy, there's no reason

它其實很簡單，沒有理由

not to do it you entitled piece of shit.

不去做它你這個無禮的混蛋。

Step one is to find some dirty dishes,

第一步是找到一些骯髒的餐具

here's a bunch, right in the sink where you left them.

這裡就有一堆，就是你把它們留在水槽裡的。

That's right, they haven't gone anywhere.

沒錯，它們並沒有消失不見。

No one's magic-ed them away,

沒有人把它們變不見

and they haven't cleaned themselves.

而它們也沒有自我清潔。

Fun fact: you did notice them, you lying coward.

小常識：你其實有注意到它們，你這個說謊的懦夫。

Here's some other places you may find dishes,

還可以在一些其他的地方找到餐具

on the counter where you left them,

在你放的櫃檯上

under your bed for some reason, everywhere I fucking look,

不知為何在你的床下，我看到的任何地方

or even in your useless useless hands.

甚至在你超級沒用的手裡。

That's right, every time you use a goddamn dish,

沒錯，每次你使用一個該死的盤子

that goddamn dish will have to be fucking washed.

那該死的盤子就他媽的需要被清洗。

Confusing? It shouldn't be. But here we are.

感到困惑嗎？不應該這樣的。但是在這裡

Fun fact: your helplessness is not a charming quirk.

小常識：你的無助並不是一個迷人的怪癖。

Now that you know where the goddamn dishes are,

現在你已經知道那些該死的餐具在哪裡

f**king wash them.

就他 X 的清洗它們。

Take soap, a sponge, and a little personal responsibility

用點洗潔精，一塊海棉，和一些些個人的責任感

and look at that you're already done.

看看，你已經完成了。

(laughs)

(笑聲)

Makes you wonder why you haven't done it sooner.

讓你納悶為何你沒有早點這麼做。

Sure makes me wonder.

確實讓我感到納悶。

Now you may actually have a giant machine in your kitchen

你可能其實有一個巨大的洗碗機在廚房

who's sole responsibility is to wash goddamn dishes for you.

它唯一的責任就是幫你把該死的餐具洗乾淨。

And if that's the case, you're a disgrace

如果真是這樣，那你就是個

who doesn't appreciate what you have.

不懂得珍惜自己所擁有的東西的恥辱。

Fun fact: your parents don't live here

小常識：你的父母並不住在這裡

and did a shitty job raising you.

而他們也沒有把你教好。

And that's all there is to it.

今天就到這裡。

Thanks for watching, I hope you learned something today.

感謝收看，我希望你們今天都有學到一些什麼。

If you didn't like the video,

如果你不喜歡這支影片

why don't you send your roommate our last installment

為何不傳給你的室友我們上一部影片

"How to Talk to Someone Like an Adult Instead of

「如何和他人像成年人一般地交流，而不是

Sending Passive Aggressive Videos.」Brat.

發送一些被動攻擊的影片。」死小子。