You know that.

你們知道的。

But I do things the same as you.

但是我的日常生活跟你們一樣。

And I went the other day to do some shopping.

我前幾天去做一些採買。

And just like you, I go in for one thing and then I end up with 40 things.

就像你們一樣，我只想買一樣東西，最後結帳時買了四十樣東西。

And unlike you, I pay with a gold bar, but...

我付錢是用黃金，這跟你們就不一樣了。

I noticed while I was shopping that sometimes stores have regular products, but then they have lady products.

我在買東西的時候發現，有時候店裡有賣一般的產品，也有賣「女生版」的產品。

Have you noticed that?

你們有發現嗎？

Which is the same thing, but pink.

是一樣的產品，只是它是粉紅色的。

And they have pink razors, and they have pink deodorant.

他們有粉紅色除毛刀，還有粉紅色止汗劑。

And now I found something else that comes...

我還發現了這些東西...

Here's the first thing right there.

第一樣在這裡。

It is a gentle laxative tablet.

這是溫和型瀉藥錠。

And I won't tell you why I bought them, I'll just tell you who I bought them for, Mary.

我不會告訴你們我為什麼要買這個，我只能告訴你們我幫誰買的， Mary 。

Well, you asked me to buy them, Mary.

是妳叫我買的啊， Mary 。

Let's call that exhibit A, because I don't want to say the word laxative again.

我們叫它「展示品 A 」吧，我不想再說「瀉藥」這個字了。

And then this is here.

再來還有這個。

This is exhibit B, women's gentle laxative tablets in pink, of course.

這是展示品 B ，女人專用的粉紅色瀉藥，當然。

That's how you know it's safe for a lady to take.

這樣你才知道女生吃下去很安全。

Both bottles are the same price because they have the same thing inside.

這兩罐的價錢是一樣的，而且它們裡面的內容物也一樣。

I'm kidding.

我開玩笑的。

The pink one has 40 fewer tablets.

粉紅色的裡面少了四十顆。

I know that's not a good deal, because I ask a man to do the math.

我知道這不是很好的交易，我有請一個男的幫我算。

This is insane.

這太誇張了。

Same amount of money, 40 less tablets.

一樣的價錢，少了四十錠。

That's not the most ridiculous thing I found.

這不是我找到最荒唐的東西。

Because then I went over to Office Depot.

因為接下來我去了辦公家具店。

I didn't need anything, but I just wanted to sniff the markers.

我沒有要買什麼，我只是想去聞麥克筆的味道而已。

And then I found this.

然後我發現了這個。

And it's a super cute emergency escape hammer.

它是一個非常可愛的擊破器。

If you get in a car accident, you can use this to cut your seat belt or break a window.

如果你發生車禍，你可以用這個割開你的安全帶或擊破窗戶。

As you can see, it's pink and shiny.

如同你所見，它是閃亮亮的粉紅色。

That's why I was immediately drawn to it.

這就是為什麼我馬上被它吸引過去。

And if you look right here, it says, get out, girl.

看看這裡，它上面寫「快逃吧！女孩！」

No, you get out, super cute emergency escape hammer.

不，你才快逃，超可愛的緊急擊破器。

Apparently, the lady car accidents are adorable.

很顯然地，女生版的車禍比較可愛。

And there's not even a mirror.

這甚至沒有鏡子在上面。

How am I supposed to check my makeup after I drive into a lake?

這樣在我開到河裡之後握要怎麼檢查我的妝容？

I don't understand.

我不懂。

They sell a non-lady version that looks like this, but that's yellow.

它們也有賣非女性版本，長這樣，它是黃色的。

That doesn't make me want to get it.

這樣我才不想買。

Plus, how do I get my little lady hands around something this big?

再加上，我的小女生手怎麼能拿這麼大的東西。

The yellow hammer's $8.

黃色的要 8 美金。

The pink one is $12.

粉紅色的要 12 美金。

Once again, we're paying more for less.

又來一次，我們花更多錢，買到更少。

We don't want pink hammers.

我們不要粉紅色擊破器。

We don't want pink laxatives.

我們不要粉紅色的瀉藥。

We want the same thing for the same price.

我們想要用一樣的價錢買一樣的東西。

And a changing room with decent lighting.

還有燈光佳的更衣間。

That's what we want.

這才是我們想要的。

And a Friends reunion, that's what we want.

還有「六人行」再度合體，這才是我們要的。

We're going to make that happen.

我們會讓它成真。