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  • If you thought my family owned a lot of hamsters,

    如果你以為我們家有很多隻倉鼠

  • Wait until I tell you about all the cats we had!

    讓我來告訴你我們有的貓!

  • Hahaha!

    哈哈哈!

  • Just a heads up though. Some of these cats are dead.

    事先說明,有些貓已經過世了

  • They all lived nine happy lives. None of them had a painful death.

    他們都有幸福快樂的九條命,沒有任何一隻痛苦的過世

  • ...

    ...

  • Except for one... maybe... we don't know.

    除了一隻...或許...我們不知道

  • We'll get into that.

    我們等等會提到他

  • Hahaha,

    哈哈哈

  • So, cats!

    所以,貓咪

  • Some people think that cats are jerks and not as loyal or loving as dogs.

    有些人認為貓是混蛋 而且不像狗一樣忠誠或可愛

  • And they're right.

    而他們是對的

  • But if you think about it,

    但如果你想一想

  • Cats im-PURR-ove our lives every day!

    貓讓我們的每一天更完“毛”美

  • Think back to YouTube in 2006,

    回想起2006年的Youtube

  • What was popular?

    什麼最熱門?

  • Cat videos.

    貓咪影片

  • If it wasn't for cats, we wouldn't have YouTube as a platform

    如果不是為了貓,我們根本不會用Youtube這個平台

  • Which, I could make the argument is another jerk thing that cats did.

    同時,這個論點是也是另一個貓做的混帳事

  • Now, I'm a cat lover,

    我是愛貓者

  • and anyone who says they dislike cats has obviously never snuggled up with a cat

    任何不喜歡貓咪的人很明顯不曾揉貓

  • and had a purr in your chest as you pet it for so long that you both fall asleep,

    而且一邊摸他 讓他在你胸口呼嚕直到你們都睡著

  • and all your anxieties melt away, and the only thing you care about is your fragile feline friend.

    所有的焦慮都消失 你唯一在乎的是你柔弱的貓夥伴

  • Or they're allergic.

    或過敏

  • Honestly, I think I'm slightly allergic to cats as well.

    老實說,我對貓也有輕微過敏

  • 'Cause every time I snuggle up with one,

    因為每次我磨蹭貓咪

  • my eyes get all watery,

    我的眼睛開始流淚

  • my nose gets all stuffy.

    我的鼻子開始堵塞

  • But like...

    但你想

  • *SnNNniFFFFFFff*

    (吸

  • I can deal with that.

    我可以接受

  • Maybe this is what love feels like.

    或許這就是戀愛的感覺

  • People like to put everybody into 2 categories,

    大家喜歡把所有人分成兩種

  • Either you're a dog person,

    狗派

  • or a cat PURR-erson,

    或貓

  • 00:01:16,500 --> 00:01:18,340 but why do I have to pick just one?

    “毛”派

  • Can't I look at these two animals and say

    但為什麼我只能選一方?

  • that both of them have good qualities that make them amazing pets,

    為什麼不能看著這兩個動物並說

  • why can't I pick both?

    雙方都有值得成為絕佳寵物的好特質

  • I...

    為什麼不能兩邊都選?

  • I'm bisexual for animals!

    我...

  • ...wait...

    在動物上我是雙性戀!

  • That being said, here's all the cats I had growing up.

    ...等等...

  • So our family had just moved to our new house

    話這麼說,這些是我成長過程中有的貓

  • and we're all getting ready to go to church,

    當我們剛搬進新家

  • when my older brother, who was outside for some reason, instead of getting ready,

    全家準備出門上教堂時

  • heard noises coming from a bush.

    而我的哥哥不知道什麼原因在院子 當他該準備出門時

  • And when he went to investigate, he found a little baby tabby kitten.

    聽到從草叢傳來的聲音

  • He told my parents about the cat and they said, "It's mom is probably looking for it,

    當他上前一看 他發現一隻小虎斑貓

  • but if the cat was still there when we come back from church,

    他告訴爸媽而爸媽說 “他的媽媽或許在找他”

  • then we can let it inside."

    “但如果我們從教會回來後他還在”

  • And after we got back,

    “我們就養他”

  • my brother checked the bush,

    回家後

  • and the cat was still there!

    我哥查看草叢

  • So, we took her in, we fed her,

    貓咪還在!

  • and we decided to name her Shady after Eminem's "The Real Slim Shady", because she was

    所以我們帶他進家門 喂他

  • an obnoxious cat, and didn't like us at all.

    決定命名為Shady取自痞子阿姆的“The Real Slim Shady“

  • "Yeah, but you so cute though!"

    因為她是隻無禮的貓 而且一點都不喜歡我們

  • And that's how our family got our one and only cat.

    “是啦但是你超可愛的”

  • One cat is enough, there were no more cats.

    而這就是我們第一隻也是唯一一隻貓的由來

  • Until one night, when I was sitting at the kitchen table,

    一隻就夠了 沒有其他貓咪

  • and through the window of the back door,

    直到某天晚上,當我坐在餐桌

  • I saw two yellow eyes staring at me.

    從後門的窗戶

  • And as a kid, I still thought monsters were real!

    我看到兩個黃眼睛瞪著我

  • So I pointed it out to my family, "Hey, there's eyes outside."

    還是小孩的我還是以為怪獸是真的

  • And everyone turned and was like,

    所以我指給家人看說 : “看,有眼睛在外面”

  • "What the?"

    所有人轉頭看一臉

  • So we opened the back door,

    "什麼鬼?"

  • and a piece of the night just walked into the house

    所以我們打開後門

  • like it lived there or something.

    一片夜晚就這樣走進屋子

  • "Does this mean we have bad luck?"

    像他住在這裡之類的

  • Apparently, just waltzing in our house uninvited is a very effective strategy to get adopted,

    “這是壞運的意思嗎?”

  • because she ended up living with us for the rest of her cat life.

    顯然,不被邀請的情況下滑進屋是很有效的領養策略

  • My older sister loved Sailor Moon,

    因為她最後和我們度過剩下的貓生

  • and in the show there was this black cat named Luna-

    我姊姊喜歡美少女戰士

  • Spoiler Alert: Luna's actually an alien that can turn into a human sometimes,

    在劇情裡有一隻名叫露娜的黑貓

  • but most of the time she's just a cat-

    暴雷警告:露娜其實是可以變身成人類的外星人

  • so we named the cat after her!

    但在多數時候她只是隻貓

  • And little ol' Luna fit great in our home.

    所以我們把她這樣命名

  • We were your standard nuclear family with two cats.

    小貓露娜和我們家很合得來

  • Just two.

    我們是個有兩隻貓的標準核心家庭

  • We never got another cat ever again.

    只有兩隻

  • UNTIL ONE DAY this other cat appeared in our backyard,

    不會再有其他貓

  • we put Luna's and Shady's food bowls outside,

    直到某一天 其他貓出現在後院

  • which meant our backyard was basically a cat sanctuary for any cat that could jump our fence,

    我們把露娜和Shady的飯碗放在外面

  • and sometimes we would see this calico cat hanging out in our backyard.

    這代表後院基本上是跳得過圍牆的貓的秘密基地

  • We didn't know if she already had a home,

    有時我們會看到這隻三花在我們後院

  • and she would run away from us if we got close,

    我不知道她是已經有主人

  • so...

    而當我們接近時她會馬上跑走

  • We left out a third food bowl for her.

    所以...

  • And then she invited some of her siblings along,

    我們幫她留了第三個飯碗

  • cause two other cats decided to chill in our backyard.

    然後她邀請她的一些兄弟姊妹過來

  • And one of the cats was a boy,

    因為新增了兩隻會在後院閒晃的貓

  • which meant we had to get all five cats

    其中一隻是公的

  • And just like that, we more than doubled the amount of cats we had.

    這代表我們要把全部五隻結紮

  • We were FELINE pretty good.

    就這樣,我們有翻倍的貓咪

  • Three more cats added to the family,

    我們覺得"喵"常好

  • cause why not?

    我們家庭新增了三隻貓

  • That's the PURR-fect amount of cats if you ask me!

    因為,何不呢?

  • Haha,

    如果你問我 這是完"毛"美的貓咪數量

  • I'm gonna name them-

    哈哈

  • NO!

    我要幫牠們命名為

  • What?

    不!

  • We're not getting three more cats.

    蛤?

  • Two is enough.

    我們不會再多養三隻貓咪

  • Wha? We can't just kick them out.

    兩隻已經夠了

  • *facepalm* We're gonna find them a new home,

    蛤?我們不能就這樣趕他們出去

  • but we're not keeping them.

    我們會幫他們找個新家

  • ... *sighs* Okay.

    但我們沒有要養他們

  • Also, you're not allowed to name them.

    ...(嘆) 好吧

  • wHaT?

    同時,你也不可以幫牠們命名

  • If you name them, then you'll get attached to them.

    ㄏ蛤ㄚˊ?

  • And we're not keeping them.

    如果取名,你會對他們產生感情

  • So since our mom banned us from naming the cats,

    而我們沒有要養他們

  • we called them: the Calico cat,

    因為媽媽禁止我們取名

  • and the two other ones.

    我們叫他們:三花,

  • And we kept on calling them this until our mom found them a new home.

    和另外兩隻

  • Turns out that their new home was OUR home,

    我們持續這樣叫他們,直到替他們找到新家

  • cause my mom never found them a new home!

    結果他們新家就是我們家

  • So we just left them food outside, and they were happy with that relationship.

    因為媽媽不曾幫他們找個新家!

  • They would let you pet them, sometimes,

    所以我們放食物在後院,他們對這樣的關係感到開心

  • and even sit on your lap, but if you tried to pick them up,

    他們會讓你摸,有時候

  • they would hiss and bite you.

    甚至坐在你腿上,但如果你試圖抱起來

  • They did not like being picked up. Or being inside.

    他們會哈氣和咬你

  • They were feral cats.

    他們不喜歡被舉起,或待在室內

  • One time it was raining, so we thought it would be a

    他們是野貓

  • good idea to bring the calico cat inside, but she freaked out!

    有一次在下大雨,我們覺得

  • She hissed and scratched us,

    抱三花進屋是好主意,但她抓狂了

  • She hated being inside more than she hated the rain.

    她邊哈氣邊抓我們

  • And BY THE WAY, cats can be VERY loud.

    比起下雨她更討厭在屋內

  • Like, as loud as dogs.

    而且聲明一下,貓可以非!常!吵!

  • They just never raise their voices.

    像,狗吠一樣吵

  • They're too proper for that.

    他們只是選擇不大聲

  • So since she didn't like being inside,

    這樣太失禮了

  • We just...

    因為她不喜歡在室內

  • ...put her back outside in the pouring rain.

    所以我們就

  • We ended up naming the boy cat Spot,

    把她放回下大雨的屋外

  • the other cat we named Pepper,

    最後我們幫公貓取名為斑點

  • and the calico...

    另一隻叫胡椒

  • ...we didn't change her name.

    而三花

  • We named her Calico.

    ...我們沒有改她的名字

  • That's like naming a dog Golden Retriever or Chihuahua.

    我們叫她三花

  • I don't know if that's sad, but,

    就像取名狗狗為黃金獵犬或吉娃娃一樣

  • you know what is sad?

    我不知道這聽起來有沒有很糟,但

  • One day Spot just...

    你知道什麼很糟嗎?

  • disappeared.

    有一天班點就...

  • He stopped showing up to the house, and we never saw him again.

    消失了

  • I hope he found a good home, but, who knows, y'know?

    他不再出現在院子,而我們再也沒見過他

  • no i'm sorry but actually i don't know

    我希望他找到一個好人家, 但,誰知道?你懂的

  • Maybe he went off to start a second life-

    不我很抱歉但事實上我不知道

  • or a fifth or sixth life-

    或許他去開啟他的第二人生

  • haha, get it, cause they have nine lives...

    或第五或第六---

  • wow apparently James isn't funny anymore maybe it's because of all the puns

    哈哈懂嗎?因為貓有九條命...

  • Yeah, but he's probably dead.

    *哇,看來James因為他的爛雙關而無趣了*

  • And then...I was in high school when Shady died.

    是啦但他或許去世了

  • She had a good home with us, but...

    然後...在我高中的時候Shady去世了

  • It was her time to go.

    在我們家她有很好的生活,但...

  • So we were down to three cats and we never got another cat ever again.

    該是她離開的時候了

  • BUT THEN ONE DAY my parents are out on a walk,

    所以貓咪數量減少到三,而我們再也沒有新的貓

  • and my mom saw a scrawny black kitten on the side of the road and she said,

    但是有一天當我父母在散步時

  • *gasp* "Can we keep it?"

    媽媽在路邊看到一隻瘦巴巴的小黑貓,然後她說

  • But my dad said, "NO! KEEP WALKING, KEEP WALKING."

    (吸氣)“我們可以養嗎?”

  • And then on their way back from the walk,

    但我爸說: ”不行!繼續走,繼續走“

  • for some reason my dad didn't take a different route,

    然後在回程路上

  • the cat was still, there, meowing at them!

    某些原因爸爸沒有選擇其他路線

  • So my parents brought her home, and my twin sister named her Pepsi.

    貓咪還在那裡,對著他們喵

  • My sister really loved Pepsi.

    所以我父母帶她回家,我的雙胞胎姊妹替她取名為Pepsi

  • I was more of a Coke person myself.

    我姐妹真的很愛Pepsi(百事)

  • But when my sister went off to college,

    我比較喜歡可口可樂

  • and I stayed home for community college,

    但我姐妹去上大學時

  • we let Pepsi outside one day...

    我留家念社區大學

  • ...and she didn't come back.

    某天我們讓Pepsi出門

  • We didn't know how to tell my sister that our cat was missing...

    ...然後她不曾回來

  • ...so we didn't.

    我們不知道怎麼跟她說貓咪不見

  • But we were all really worried,

    ...所以我們沒說

  • we put up "Missing" posters,

    但我們都非常擔憂

  • And after almost two months of being missing,

    我們貼尋貓啟事

  • SHE JUST APPEARED IN THE BACKYARD!

    兩個月的失蹤後

  • I don't know what happened in that two month period,

    她就這樣出現在後院!

  • she looked fine, maybe she got adopted by another family,

    我不知道那兩個月發生了什麼

  • and now some poor family is missing their cat Salem.

    她看起來還好,或許被另一個家庭收養

  • Maybe she went out looking for my sister and got lost,

    而現在有可憐的家庭在想念他們的貓Salem

  • maybe she started acting in some Japanese TV shows, who knows?

    或許她去找我姐妹然後迷路

  • But, we found her.

    或許她去一些日本電視劇演出,誰知道?

  • We didn't even tell my sister that our cat had been missing until after we found Pepsi,

    但,我們找到她了

  • so,

    我們甚至沒跟我姐妹說貓不見過,直到我們找到她

  • she wasn't very happy about that.

    所以,

  • Then, Luna passed away.

    對於這件事她不是很開心

  • It was sad, but...

    然後,露娜過世了

  • cats don't live forever.

    很傷心,但...

  • Sorry.

    貓咪不會永遠活著

  • Sailor Moon wasn't even a good show anyway.

    抱歉

  • Now longtime Odd1sOut fans might know this next story.

    反正美少女戰士也沒那麼好看

  • My older brother found another kitten at the gym he worked at,

    而Odd1sOut老粉或許知道接下來的故事

  • brought her home, and named her Azula.

    我哥哥在他去的健身房找到另一隻小貓

  • But the name Azula didn't stick because we found out Azula was a dude.

    帶他回家並命名她為Azula

  • I was the one, by the way, who saw Azula's...

    但Azula這個名字沒有持續,因為我們發現他是公的

  • firebenders...

    順道一提,我就是那位,看到Azula的...

  • ...and told everyone,

    火箭筒...

  • just wanted to get that part of the story straight.

    ...和告訴大家

  • So, Azula's name had to change, and while this was happening,

    只是想迅速解故事的這個部分

  • we had a French foreign exchange student living with us,

    所以,Azula必須改名,在這段期間

  • and she didn't know the word for "kitten",

    有個法國交換學生和我們一起住

  • so she called him, "Ze Baby Cat",

    她不知道英文”小貓“的詞

  • and so we all started calling him the "Baby Cat", and now that's his name, Baby Cat,

    所以她叫他 ”寶寶貓“

  • that's how we got his name, Baby Cat.

    所以我們持續叫他”寶寶貓“,而這就是他的名字

  • Since we're on the topic of pets, I have something that I probably should have mentioned a while ago.

    這就是他名字的由來

  • For the most part, I try to keep this channel goofy and lighthearted,

    因為我們在談寵物的話題,我有些先前就想說的話

  • which is probably why I waited so long to tell you this,

    多數時候,我試著讓這個頻道保持古怪和輕快

  • but around Christmas of 2017, my dog Georgie passed away.

    或許是為什麼我這們久才告訴你們這個

  • You might remember her in some of my older videos,

    但2017聖誕節前後,Georgie過世了

  • she was 13 years old, and just like the cats, it was her time to go.

    你或許記得她曾出現在一些舊影片

  • Yes, it was sad, but, that's what happens to pets.

    她13歲而且就像那些貓,是她該走的時候了

  • They become your best friend, but they're not in your life forever.

    沒錯這很難過,但這就是有寵物必定發生的

  • So if you have pets, remember to appreciate them now.

    他們變成你最好的朋友,但他們不會永遠在你生命裡

  • I wouldn't have changed anything about Georgie's life.

    所以如果你有寵物,記得珍惜當下

  • She was a good dog.

    我不會想改變Georgie生命裡的任何事

  • Sorry, that part got a little...

    她是隻好狗狗

  • PURR-sonal!

    抱歉,這段很有點...

  • Haha!

    私人 (Purr=貓咪呼嚕雙關)

  • *Clap*

    哈哈!

  • And my dog, Poppy, did not take Georgie's death very well,

    (拍)

  • so my parents had to get an emotional support dog

    我的狗Poppy不太能接受Georgie過世的事實

  • for their dog, and they got Jacks, cause he likes to jump,

    所以我父母為了他而找了一隻情感支持犬

  • so he was their "Jumping Jacks". Aww, what a good name.

    取名為Jack因為他喜歡跳

  • Hello everyone. It's been a while since I posted one of this things.

    所以他是跳跳捷克,歐多麽好的名字

  • Between Thanksgiving and YouTube Rewind, I've been pretty busy.

    嗨囉各位,距離上次上傳這些已經間隔了很久

  • Speaking of YouTube Rewind...

    在感恩節和YouTube年度回顧這段期間 我很忙碌

  • what you guys think of it?

    說到YouTube年度回顧...

  • I mean, I liked it.

    你們覺得如何?

  • And I'm not just saying that because I had a speaking role in the video.

    我是說,我喜歡

  • And no, I'm not salty that this YouTube Rewind getting a lot of extra HATE...

    而我不是因為在影片裡有個有說話的角色的緣故

  • even though I was featured more prominently in it.

    我沒有對於這次Youtube年度回顧得到很多黑特而被惹毛

  • I'M FINE WITH THAT!

    雖然我的角色很突出

  • I GET IT! *laughs*

    我可以接受

  • If I sound different, that's because I'm using a different microphone...

    我懂

  • and I'm tired.

    如果我聲音變了,那是因為我使用了另一個麥克風

  • I wanted to do something new in this video

    加上疲倦

  • and that I wanted to release a shirt to go along with the video.

    在這支影片我想做一些新的東西

  • I'm always trying to keep my merch store fresh with new stuff.

    就是我要發行影片相關T恤

  • So, if you like the video...

    我一直都試著新增商品讓我的商店保持新鮮感

  • and you like cats...

    所以如果你喜歡這支影片

  • buy the shirt. *laughs*

    加上你喜歡貓

  • Man, I can't believe I did a whole video on cats,

    買這件衣服 (笑)

  • and didn't even say the word "pus--

    天阿我不敢相信我做了一整部關於貓的影片

  • Huge shout out to everyone who worked on this video.

    甚至沒說出那個字”小ㄇ---”

  • If it wasn't for them, I wouldn't be able to made this video as quick as I do.

    大聲感謝這支影片的所有貢獻的人

  • Subtitles by: Jaynes, Baka,

    要不是有他們,我無法這麼快產出這支影片

  • They're not quick. *laughs*

    英文字幕製作者:Jaynes, Baka,

  • So, that's gonna do for this video. As always...

    他們不快 (笑)

  • W-- Wait. What's this?

    以上就是這支影片,如往常般...

  • It's Alex Clark challenge me to a chess boxing match?

    ㄉ--等等 這是什麼?

  • OW, YOU'RE ON, DUDE!!

    是Alex Clark像我發起西洋棋拳擊挑戰?

  • ...wear your seatbelt.

    好喔老兄,挑戰接受!

If you thought my family owned a lot of hamsters,

如果你以為我們家有很多隻倉鼠

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