Hi guys welcome to making out with my ex-girlfriend. I'M FREAKING OUTTTTTT. Hi guys

嗨guys 今天的主題是「熱吻前女友」

We're doing it you better actually kiss me. I hate this, listen

A: 我覺得我快嚇死了 S: 沒錯我們要接吻了 你最好真的親我 A: 我討厭玩這個

We're exes. We broke up about two years ago, so like really relevant. Oh man. No one's gonna know

A: 我們是前女友關係 S: 大概兩年前分手 A: 呃..解釋得真好 S: 喔天啊大家一定

what we're talking about we're so irrelevant. Yeah...

看不懂我們在幹嘛 我們真的很亂聊

We never made a why we broke up video

我們從沒有錄「我們為什麼分手」的影片

So, you're welcome for this one now. That would have went really well. Could you imagine ?

S: 所以 拍這支影片 不用謝我 A: 如果當時拍分手影片一定會很順利（反諷）

What would have happened if we made a breakup video would be "Space". WOAH, did you think "Space" was written about you ? HAHAHA

S: 你可以想像嗎？如果我們真的有分手影片應該是"Space"' A: 哇 你該不會以為"Space"是在寫你？

That's so great you think that's about you ? But wrong that was not about you. Right that was your other person you dated. BUCKLE UP BUCKLE UP !

A: 太扯了 你以為是在寫你？但Wrong這首就不是給你的 S: 是齁？是給另一個你交往過的人 A: 繫緊安全帶 快繫緊

We should do this more often, this is so fun

我們應該常一起錄影片 太好玩了

You miss our channel ?

你想念我們的頻道嗎

What if we actually had an exes channel ? *** you, WE WERE GOING TO ! When ?

S: 當時如果我們真的有創一個前女友頻道會怎樣？ A: F* you 我們本來要創的 S: 哪時？

when I was gonna move back in,

那時我本來要搬回來

you were like oh wait *** you gotta be a crazy person

我以為你是什麼瘋子

and come and break into your house and steal shit.

闖入我家 要偷東西

Oh my god, you have me confused with someone else.

omg 你以為我是別人

You went and stole a bike. MY bike !

S:你來 然後偷走腳踏車 A: 「我的」腳踏車

Yeah ! I stole my bike. That was the last thing I had here !

對對對我偷了「我的」腳踏車，這是我唯一還放在這的東西

[singing] stole my bike ! I stole my...

（自唱）我偷了我的腳踏車 我偷了我的....

This is... arguing with my ex-girlfriend

這支影片應該叫「與前女友爭吵」

about... everything

「什麼都可以吵」

so we're gonna answer some Q's (questions)

所以我們要來回答一些問題

And if we don't kill each other

如果最後我們沒有殺死對方

then we're gonna kiss

我們就得親對方

all right first question : Why don't you love me ?

好的 第一個問題：你為什麼不愛我

Second question : what's my name ?

第二的問題：我叫什麼名字

I'm sorry, I'm just *** with you.

抱歉，我只是鬧你的

What's my birthday ?

我生日什麼時候？

December 21st.

12月21

Are you ser(ious) that was a joke !

你認（ㄓㄣ）？你開玩笑的吧

that was a jo(ke) (rires)

你開玩ㄒ..

what the *** with you *** ! *** you ! Is it really (???)

A: 哇靠 X你的 X你的 S: 11號是嗎

It's that it ? what's my birthday ?

(答對Ally拍手) S: 是11？那我生日勒？

Oh July 13th !

7月13號！

How long did we date ?

我們在一起多久？

Wait, what was our anniversary...

等等，我們紀念日是哪時？

It's April and then we broke up in more no, no, that's our anniversary

是四月 然後後來我們分手在... no..no 那是我們的紀念日

I just said that is our anniversary like it's still like we're back together or something

我剛說那是我們的紀念日 說得好像我們其實已經復合了

Can you imagine we've been together the whole time

你可以想像嗎 其實我們一直都在一起？

so we were together for a year, what was our song ? Anchor Michaelson ?

S: 所以我們在一起快一年 A: 我們的歌是哪首？S: Anchor Michaelson?

Oh my god. You made that whole video. What did you put ? I wrote this question because I didn't think we had one

A: 天阿 S: 那整支影片都你做的欸 你放了什麼歌？ A: 我寫這題目 因為我以為我們沒有定情曲

Why did we break up ? Do you want to hear what I always tell people ? wait, yeah !

A: 我們為什麼分手？ S: 你想聽我都怎麼跟別人說嗎 A: 等等 當然啊

You and your last ex why'd you guys break up?

你和你前女友怎麼分手的？

There's no one interested in me why do they want to know my past? What do you say to people?

A: 沒人對我有興趣啊 他們為什麼會想知道我的過去？ S: 你都怎麼跟別人說？

I don't say anything you went and talk shit on me. Oh yeah, but

A: 我都不說啊 S: 你都麻說我壞話 A: 呃..是啦但..

Gonna go over here, so we get it you were angry

A: 我要離開這了 S: 我們懂 你當時很生氣嘛

You needed to write 2 songs and also have like a public MENTAL BREAKDOWN. It's fine

S: 你生氣到要寫兩首歌 A: 還有一次在外面情緒崩潰 沒關係

You know how 2 people the other person's positive should it should help that person's riight and vice versa our

當兩個人 其中一個人正面的一切要幫助另一個人的負面情緒 相反也是如此

Challenges that we had made each other worse, and that's why we broke up

但我們遇到的挑戰 卻讓我們兩個都越來越糟 所以後來我們就分手了

Oh my god. Yeah. No, that's true so hey Ali. Why did we break up um um um?

A: omg yeah 你說得對 S: 那Ally你說看看我們怎麼分手

All right, it was bad. There was a lot of things

當時真的很糟..發生了很多事

This is so awkward I could hear the crickets

現在好尷尬喔 我可以聽到蟋蟀在叫

They're actually outside like they're real crickets, but they're not helping

他們真的就在外面叫 但一點幫助也沒有

Did we ever hook up after the breakup Allison listen go on the answer it did we

A: 我們分手後還有親密過嗎？ S: Allison! A: 聽著 S: 快啊你回答

Define hookup so we went out with Rose and Rosie one night

A: 請先定義「親密」 S: 某晚我們跟Rose和Rosie出去

That was a night that wasn't nice, and then they left we were just dancing and then you

A: 就是那晚 S: 對就是那晚 後來他們先走 我們在跳舞 然後你

Kissed me. Oh my god. Oh my god

親了我 A: oh my god oh my god 我當時醉了

We cooked jambalaya and macaroni and cheese together we cry together. We just held each other

我們後來一起煮了什錦飯 通心麵和起司 然後一起哭 就抱在一起

It was really sweet and really sad and really like oh oh

真的很甜蜜 但又同時很悲傷 A: oh oh..

Glad you felt that way we talked about it. You're like soooo and it was like wait. You kissed me and you were like

A: 很高興你這樣覺得 S: 後來我們談這件事 你就很....然後我說：等等是你先親我的 然後你就說...

I got a lot of explainin to do to my therapist

我不知道要怎麼跟我的諮商師解釋了

Had to retract that statement real quick oh my god, that's so embarrassing I can't believe we're telling the Internet all this

A: 必須趕快收回我說的話 omg 真的很丟臉 S: 我不敢相信我們竟然跟大家說這些

What is one thing that you miss? What's one thing what one thing I miss

你最想念我什麼？你最想念的一件事

your cooking

A: 我想念你的廚藝 S: 我還是可以為你下廚啊

I do miss you playing guitar for me. Okay. What's one thing? You don't miss just one I?

S: 我想念你都彈吉他給我聽 A: ok那你最不喜歡的一件事勒 S: 只能說一件事？

I don't miss how many

我不想念...

Projects were going on like we're building this. We're buying this. We're redoing this we're

你想要同時做很多事 像突然要建這個 突然要買這個 突然要重新整理這個

Reupholstering this. I love decorating. I know. Once I'm done with this. I'm redecorating I

突然要重新裝新什麼 太誇張了 S: 我喜歡佈置家裡麻 A: 我知道 S: 我剛完成這些 我又想重新佈置了

I am so glad I got over this

我很慶幸我已經不用經歷這些了

I'm glad that we're announcing that we're both in therapy get in therapy guys. I can't

我很開心我們跟大家說 我們都有在看諮商師 A: 找一個諮商師吧 S: XXX.com A: 我不能在這影片放廣告啦

Go on what's one thing you don't miss I don't think I

繼續吧 你最不想念我的一件事是什麼 S: 我不覺得我有...

Hate something don't miss something come on. I would really hate oh

討厭你任何事 A: 拜 託 S: 我真的很討厭...喔.. A: 她果然想到了

When she's mad she just disappears for hours. I don't miss like wondering if she's dead or not cuz I did something wrong

他每次生氣的時候 就突然消失好幾個小時 我不喜歡在那邊乾等 怕他出事 就因為我做錯了什麼

Fair what's one thing that like maybe you didn't do before we dated

確實是這樣 那在我們交往前 你沒有做過的事

And now you've adopted a new habit you had to keep the volume on an even number

但因為跟我交往 所以你開始有了新習慣 S: 我會時時刻刻提醒自己聲音的大小要適中

I still do that and I think of you every time

每次想到你 我都會這樣

I don't even put the volume on even, but I knew you have OCD um I love bidets

A: 我完全不會注意自己音量 所以你現在也有OCD了 uhm..我喜歡洗屁盆

You know that my parents have a bidet in their house now because you talk about so much yes next question. What's your fav?

現在我爸媽家就有洗屁盆了 S: 因為你太常講了嗎 A: 對 下個問題 你最喜歡的

memory our

回憶是什麼

Vacations were I think I just like vacation

假期旅遊 我喜歡小旅行

I just like vacation. SINCE WHEN, you are the worst to travel with are you joking I'm a changed woman, so like you mine

我喜歡旅行 S: 何！時？跟你旅遊你毛最多 你開玩笑嗎 A: 我已是個改變的女人了

Don't like now no I'm different so the three months that we first got to know each other, and we're just drunk

我們剛認識的前三個月 幾乎每天都喝醉

That was fun

那陣子很好玩

Yeah

摁啊

We didn't have any furniture. We just sat on our fuckin wood floors and order the pizza and ate the lobster pizza

我們那時還沒有傢俱 就坐在木地板上 點pizza來吃 我們一起吃龍蝦pizza

That was really cute. What's yours?

真的很甜蜜 那你呢？

All right times up

好了時間到

I just think you're so cute

我只是覺得你都很可愛

So they keep things you would do like make me coffee and bring it to me like do a little dance

你會做很多可愛的事 幫我煮咖啡 邊跳舞邊拿來給我喝

You're just like so fucking weird am I weirder than most people. Yes, Oh, No

你真的超怪的 A: 我比其他人都怪嗎 S: 對啊 A: 喔不

How I

S: 很抱歉親愛的沒錯 A: 為什麼 怎麼會 F*

I really like when we got locked out on that balcony in Singapore. Okay, that's Singapore trip had its downside

我很懷念我們去新加坡的時候 被鎖在陽台外面 新加坡旅行的確有不順的地方

I had a great time

但我很享受

You told everyone you had an awful time nothing yeah, I just private tweeted. Don't go on vacation with your ex

S: 你明明就跟大家說你玩得很不開心 A: 我只是偷偷在twitter上發私文說「別跟前女友去旅行」

That's all I was only mad because you were on your phone

我不高興是因為你都在用手機

So much, I'm always on my phone so much well

一直在用！ S: 我本來就常常都在用手機啊

I had a great time, otherwise though Singapore rules we ran from the cops twice

但我需要你注意我啊 此外我都覺得新加坡之旅滿好玩的 S: 我們躲警察躲了兩次

Amazing, what was our worst fight? I don't know they're just all so bad

很棒啊！ 我們吵最兇的是哪次？我不知道 每次都很糟

Dry erase board yeah, I know all of the things I've ever done wrong in the whole relationship

你在小白板上寫下我最錯過什麼事

And then threw it across the room you're wrong hold on I'm about to tell you what I did with this dry erase board

然後把白板丟到房間另一頭 A: 不是這樣 我來跟你說我怎麼做

Okay, well how dare you this is the dry erase board?

你怎麼敢亂說 好 這是小白板

Why are you holding it like a dish, so they can see this is the floor?

S: 你幹嘛好像在端菜 A: 所以他們才看得清楚 這麼是地面

bullshit I went like

S: 屁啦 A: 我只是這樣...沒有我沒有那樣

Okay, my neighbors are gonna be like

S: 好好好 A: 你的鄰居應該會問「Ally回來了嗎 還是他來找你而已」

Can we talk about how I'm more upset that you wrote down everything I ever done wrong in our relationship on a whiteboard

我想說 你把我做錯的事全寫在白板上 讓我有多生氣

I know I should have done it on paper, so you could like reflect on it after uh-huh

我知道 我應該寫在紙上 所以你之後可以反省

What is your current

你最近對我的印象是什麼

impression of me you just you're you have

你現在好像比較有情緒

emotions now I do

真的是 超怪的

You seem like the same person but with more

你好像其實沒什麼變 但

Emotion I feel like you just take people's feelings into consideration

有更多感情 比起以前 你現在會把別人的感覺納入考慮

More than you used to yeah, I used to be like who the fuck are you get out of my life. Yes

沒錯 之前我都會覺得：滾開 你誰啊

I think that you're way more cocky. Do you really yeah, cuz you're like more confident about yourself

我覺得你比以前更自大 A: 真的假的 S: 你現在對自己比較有自信

you're also more come that you used to be combative, but only if you were joking and then if it was anything serious

你也比以前更好鬥 你之前也會愛拌嘴 但都是在開玩笑的時候 但如果事情很嚴肅

You're like NO BYEEE and now you're like

你就會想閃 然後 現在的話

Oh, this is a problem

你會覺得 如果這是一個問題 我就必須面對問題 然後告訴對方你的感受

So I'm going to confront this problem and like tell the person how I feel so did we break out because Shannon and Cammie broke up?

我們分手是因為Shannon和Cammie分手嗎

Um we broke up because we had the same bad side and how would we ever film videos together?

我們分手是因為我們都是同一臉不上相 這樣我們要怎麼錄影片

I prefer to sit on this side and so does she and so she makes me sit over here do the two of you speak?

我喜歡坐那邊 他也是 所以他會逼我坐這邊

Really hang out without telling us duh all they do is send us gifs of us making out

你們兩個分手後有偷偷約出去沒告訴大家的嗎 廢話啊 大家一直傳我們親親的gif給我們

That's why I hang out with you

這就是為什麼我還跟你出去 我想要更多gif檔

I need more gifts if I read one more article where I mentioned and they describe me as Ally Hills's former girlfriend

如果我再看到任何文章 上面形容我是Ally Hills的前女友

I'm gonna kill someone. It's not what you're described as I'm gonna kill you if anyone. You are Stevie. Bobby's girlfriend or my girlfriend

我會想殺人 A: 你是這樣被形容的嗎 S: 我想殺你 如果有人說你是Stevie的女朋友 前女友

All right, okay, who broke up with who?

alright 誰跟誰提分手

We're not answering that question. Did you intentionally leave that out of the list or?

A: 我們沒有要回答這個問題 S: 你故意跳過這題的嗎

This is gonna be our biggest fight. We were going at it, and I go

那應該是我們最大的爭吵 我們火力全開 然後我說 我們應該分手

Like that and I said you're right that was just a suggestion I went in there I took a shower I know

S: 然後你說 我也覺得應該先分手 A: 那只是建議

Gonna go out. Of course. You just broke up with me

然後我進去洗澡 梳頭化妝 準備要出門 因為妳已跟我分手

Oh, my god was like hey nah that will come, but we just have too much

Oh my god 結果我說hey不是這樣的 剛剛講的那些都太情緒化

I'm just kidding look I can erase it on the white board right. That's why I wrote it on a whiteboard

我只是開玩笑的 我可以把白板上的擦掉 A: 這就是為什麼我要寫白版

We can't explain this whole story because then we're gonna have to go to the next day. Yeah

我們無法講完這故事 不然我們要解釋到隔天

You think about that one. Did you think about that one so you broke up with me cool didn't break up we got it

A: 你想到那件事了 你想到那件事對嗎 反正是你跟我分手 S: 我沒有跟你分手

We figured it out

反正先這樣 我們會自己搞清楚的

Do you regret the relationship at all?

你會後悔這段感情嗎

No, I needed to learn

不會 反正我必須學習

It made me more self-aware I think that I was less upset than you think no I was more

這段感情讓我更有自我意識 S: 我其實比你想像中的更不難過(口誤)喔不 我更難...

cool

酷 酷喔

Cool, I think I was more upset than you realize look I cried once or twice huh Oh?

我比你想像的更難過 我哭了一兩次

What do you think about me being Polly? What a surprise?

S: 對於我是個Poly(多元開放關係) 你有什麼看法？ A: 喔哇 真令人驚訝(反諷)

You ever wondered about if we would have gotten married. How it would have turned out. Yeah, what if I was married right now?

S: 你有沒想過如果當初我們結婚 會怎樣 A: 有 如果我現在已婚

That's crazy

真的很扯

We were dating each other's exes. No, but our exes have dated

S: 我們有跟彼此的前任交往過嗎？ A: 沒有 但我的前任有跟你的前任交往過

You can't say that

這你不能說出來

Okay, you don't need to turn wait hold on hold on the kiss so what's the point of kissing? There is no point?

A: ok 你不需要轉過來 等一下 等等 接吻要來了 S: 所以接吻意義是麼

It's just what everyone else does. Okay? We're copiers. What are you going for? What kind of kiss? Are you looking at get ready?

沒有意義 只是大家都這樣做 好嗎 我們只是抄襲

Let's go wait. No. No. I'm not no. I'm not. I'm not oh

A: 你在幹嘛 你在找哪種吻法 S: ok準備好了嗎 來吧

My god whose idea was this? MINE!. Okay. Okay? Oh?

A: 等等 還沒我還沒 S: 快點 開始 A: 不 等等我還沒準備好 停 喂

We're not done

我這手該放哪 喂 欸欸

That's enough for me

S: omg這誰的idea阿 A: 我的

Very tight very tight lipped tight lips tight my name don't wear it out. Okay. That was a doozy

ok ok

How do you feel after the entire video I feel great by the way I made a video

喔 我們沒還沒完成

On my channel of us reacting to our old videos. Oh, yeah, go watch it. Yeah

來吧

Subscribe to me oh babe hey subscribe and subscribe to me and subscribe to everyone on YouTube

A: 這樣對我來說夠了 夠了 我很抱歉 S: 緊緊的 嘴唇很緊

I mean come on right we all need the subscription right?

緊嘴唇 這是我的名字 不要隨便叫

Can I use a subscribe notice they subscribe to CV and also everyone else yeah? That's it? We did it you did it yay?

ok 剛真是太有趣

That's it for us. I'm so impressed. I'll see you later suckers

錄完這支影片 你覺得如何

Can you out shade Reza's own dicks like no no

我覺得很棒阿 對了 在我頻道那邊 我們也錄了另一支影片 我們一起看了之前在一起的影片