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  • (Ned) I know that the other guys do not like my photos very much, so I'm not looking forward to this.

  • (Keith) Your Instagram does look like that of most teenage girls.

  • (Zach) Yeah, that's all I wanna be. (Keith) You know, you're crushing it.

  • (Ned) Can i just get one photo of you without having your shirt off?

  • (Ned) See even now? Even now you're doing it.

  • (Zach) He uses Instagram as if he has three followers and they're all his mom.

  • (Zach) *laughing* I don't understand

  • (Keith) Welcome to another episode of Try Guys Game Time.

  • (Keith) Today the Try Guys are roasting each other with all the social media they've been Posting on the internet.

  • (Zach) Why do you talk like that? (Eugene) I like it do it again, yay.

  • (emphasizing p) Posts.

  • (Keith) These are things from our Instagrams, from our Twitters

  • Anywhere on the internet that we've posted, we can comment on it and we can roast it.

  • (Keith) Try Guys Game Time, roast your soc' (ial media)

  • (Ned) Roast your soc'!

  • (Keith) Roast your soc'! (All) Try Guys Game Time!

  • (Ned) We haven't nailed it once.

  • (Intro music)

  • (Keith) I'm starting out in the hot seat, and let me tell ya, this butt is hawt.

  • (Keith) What do you guys have for me? *laughter*

  • (Zach) Keith is so unabashedly bad at social media.

  • Like, I think it's like, kind of something something he enjoys how shitty he is.

  • For someone who's job *is* social media.

  • (Ned) Everyone's always posting 'oh look at me next to this pool,' 'oh look how hot I am,'

  • 'oh look at these cool clothes i'm wearing.' Keith, every single photo- *disturbing growl noise*

  • Every single photo! Like, he never hands the phone to someone else to, like, just take an actual photo,

  • It's always just weird angle selfie.

  • (Zach) Whereas the three of us are exclusively pains in the ass making each other take photos.

  • (Zach) So- (Ned) And by the three of us (Ned and Eugene) You mean you.

  • (Zach) Awh, girl no.

  • (Ned) So many of your photos are just you smashing shit in your face. [Eugene laughing]

  • Here's a Danish, here's a piece of fried chicken, here's two hotdogs!!

  • This one doesn't even have you in it! It's just a plate of your food!

  • (Zach) Maybe that's something you put on your story..maybe.

  • He is a relentless self-promoter.

  • Half of the reason Keith has Instagram is to tell you about some fucking show that is going on.

  • It's always the derpiest nut, like, what-wh-who

  • What! In what world is this photo gonna make someone wanna come see your show?

  • (Ned) What is this?! This was on Instagram.com/KeithHabs!

  • You have over 800, 000 followers, SIR.

  • (Keith) And they come for the content I deliver. (Ned) Oh, my god.

  • (Keith) Euuugene. You think you're so hot. Well i've pulled up some of the ugliest photos Eugene has ever taken.

  • Like this one. What's hot about this?

  • He's standing shirtless in front of a waterfall. Uglyy!

  • (Ned) It's always you with your shirt off and a weird object.

  • W-what is this? Me with my shirt off next to a cute animal.

  • This dog isn't even yours!

  • (Eugene) Oh yeah that was a photo shoot for a magazine and I, uh, found that dog in the lobby.

  • (Keith) Ew! In front of an exploded volcano? *nasty throwing up noise* yuck yuck yuck.

  • (Zach) There's a hilarious sub-section of Eugene's Instagram that's like

  • 'Oh I'm ugly' and it's just him doing faces like *making weird noises*

  • (Ned) *imitating Eugene* Look at me I''m ugly even though you know me to be very beautiful

  • (Zach) I'm not hot, I'm approachable! (Ned) And they're all still really hot. (Zach) And they're still super hot.

  • (Ned) Eugene, you have an inability to let yourself not look hot in any photo.

  • (Keith) Let me show you one of the photos that's hot that you have taken. Boom.

  • That's right. Got a little Keith in the waist. [Eugene laughing]

  • Got a little smile on the face :)

  • (Zach) Eugene takes and steals my clothes and posts hot photos in them all the time.

  • My socks. Top comment? "Cool socks."

  • My shirt, my jacket.

  • (Keith) *to Eugene* They do look better on you. (Zach) Yeah they do look better on Eugene.

  • (Eugene) I don't have enough photos with dumb shit. [all laughing]

  • (Zach) I'd say good luck, I have a pretty good social media presence.

  • I think I'm killing the game.

  • (Keith) I only have one photo. It's the photo I hate more than any photo ever.

  • It's the one where you just finished having sex with your dog.

  • [laughter] It's very clear. You guys just had rockin' sex.

  • You might have sex right again after this photo. [all but Keith laughing]

  • The way he's looking at you, the way you look, like, you have that post-coital glow.

  • Did you roll on the fucking? Or was it just after the fucking was done?

  • (Eugene) You do have a tendency to pose, and pretend like you're not posing.

  • It's a very particular skill. (Zach) Uh-huh.

  • (Ned) *Imitating Zach* I'm posing to make it look effortless, yet it's very staged.

  • (Zach) Does it look effortless? (Ned) No. (Keith) Like this.

  • (Keith) It's like 'I'm not posing i'm just hanging out on top of a table, like a normal person. My legs are everywhere.

  • (Ned) I'm casually sitting against an open refrigerator in a junkyard.

  • (Eugene) Yeah usually it takes about 30 frames before you're happy.

  • (Zach) It takes a lot of photos to make this look good.

  • (Eugene) I'm Zach, you're you. (Keith) Okay.

  • (Eugene) Frame it this way, let me see that, okay? Now everyone stop what you're doing, just one second.

  • (Eugene) Okay, okay. (Zach) I don't make them stop what they're doing

  • (Ned) Guys can we go? (Eugene) Zach's go-to cuff adjustment.

  • (Eugene) Zach's go-to down on the knee, tie the shoe. (Zach) Yuup.

  • (Eugene) Here. (Zach) I never use that one. (Eugene) Yeah, I've seen it a couple times.

  • (Keith) I saw you do it last weekend at Palm Springs! (Zach) No, I know, I do it but I never post it cuz it looks dumb.

  • (Ned) The fucking ankles. It's all about his ankles. (Zach) Yeahhh. If you got 'em, flaunt 'em.

  • (Keith) Your photos bore me. They just look like LaurDIY's shitty photos that she wouldn't put up.

  • [Zach laughing] (Keith) Ya know? It looks like a real Instagrammer second choice photo.

  • (Keith) Ya know? You're just doing it for the 'Gram, I get it.

  • (Ned) Bring on the roasting!

  • (Zach) I definitely had the most fun doing Ned's.

  • (Eugene) If I might encapsulate Ned's social media, in one sentence.

  • Dad. Just. Discovers. Teen stuff.

  • (Ned) That's giving me more credit than I think I deserve.

  • (Eugene) Like, for example, there's this great Instagram photo of you. (Zach) Oh my god, what the hell is going on there?

  • (Eugene) And the caption is; 'When your friend is dating a fuckboy'

  • It's like a little late. (Zach) It's referencing something that's- (Eugene) Slightly late.

  • (Zach) It's funny that Eugene mentioned fuckboy, because this is the most fuckboy photo of all time. [Ned laughing]

  • The caption is 'snows out, bows out'. I guess you're referring to your elbows?

  • (Ned) Yeah. (Zach) Big love for Quinta, who wrote, 'What's happening here Ned'.

  • (Keith) I don't know if you notice Ned's style, I like to call it 'what Eugene was doing recently.'

  • *laughter* Uh, this is Ned in a pair of shorts overalls, because Eugene wears shorts overalls.

  • This is him in front of a waterfall with a straw hat, because Eugene *can* do this.

  • And looks amazing when he does it. Ned, even in the picture, is aware it's not working out.

  • *all laughing*

  • (Zach) Keith tweets like no one's watching. The most Keith tweet of all time is:

  • 'Blah, blah, blah. Joke, joke, joke. Commentary'.

  • (Keith) That's what everyone's tweeting. They're trying to be so original with their fucking garbage joke with some commentary.

  • (Eugene) All of these photos also have the worst captions.

  • 'Eating a hotdog in a Chicago suburb'.

  • Like, you just describe exactly what's in the photo.

  • (Ned) 'When you're waiting for your burrito. #burrito.'

  • [Eugene and Keith laughing]

  • (Eugene) The actual caption is, 'This is my mouth'. [Keith laughing]

  • You wanna know what the hashtag is?..Mouth.

  • *laughter* 'This is my mouth, #mouth'.

  • That's Keith's idea of content on his social media. (Zach) Wow.

  • (Zach) I feel like all these insults needs the caveat that no matter what I do, and no matter what he does

  • Keith still has way more followers than me. It makes no sense, he's so bad. Follow @korndiddy I'm giving you good content.

  • (Keith) You have more than me on Twitter. (Zach) On Twitter. (Keith) Yeah. (Zach) That's true.

  • (Keith) Cuz of your blah, blah blah. Joke, joke joke. Commentary.

  • [all laughing]

  • (Keith) There is a tweet that Mr. ''eUgEnE LeE yAnG'' sent out one time

  • And it's one of these tweets that he does every so often that it's just w-ww-what?

  • 'Every single person believes, that one time while they were walking outside, they could talk to birds'.

  • This isn't even blah, blah, blah. Joke, joke, joke. Commentary. This is just blah, blah, blah.

  • (Eugene) It's true. You guys don't try to talk to birds sometimes? [other Try Guys] No!

  • (Keith) Most of your tweets, and most of your successful tweets, are just about family dynamics.

  • 'What it's like to have a sister'.

  • (Ned) 'My mom's crazy'.

  • (Keith) 'My grandma says crazy stuff'.

  • Like, it is the most 'slice-of-life' content

  • (Zach) #SiblingProblems!!!!!!

  • (Keith) Also, in my little array, you have saw several outfits that Ned has tried to accomplish.

  • [all cracking up laughing]

  • (Keith) -in his Instagram

  • (Zach) I need to put my foot down and defend those of us in the world who are vision impaired because this. is not. a. fashion. accessory.

  • all of your photos is *imitating Eugene* 'Oh look I can't see, I have glasses, look how hot I am"

  • GET THESE FUCKING THINGS OFF YOUR FACE EUGENE!!

  • This is not here to make ya hot, it's here to help me and Keith not bump into shit when we're walking!

  • (Keith) For all of those people out there who want to wear glasses cuz you look cool, then you better start wearing glasses everyday from the age of 5.

  • Then you're allowed to do it.

  • (Zach) You haven't felt the struggle Eugene!

  • Ya can't just use it to look hot.

  • (Ned) Aight Zach, you're making fun of me for hopping on bandwagon. You are the *most* guilty of hopping on the bandwagon of things.

  • PUBG, Fortnite, Musical.ly, do you remember your musical.ly phase?!

  • (Eugene) Oh, I'm bringing it up. (Zach) Oh yeahh.

  • (Ned) Where- you just realized Musical.ly was popular, and tried to make...

  • *generic teen pop*

  • (Keith) *over music* This is worse than Instagram photos because this actually took real time out of our day because

  • he would ruin things. (Ned) It took you two hours to do.

  • (Keith) You can't even monetize this content!

  • (Keith) This is probably the tweet I hate the most from Zach.

  • It's this picture of you fucking your dog.

  • [All Try Guys Laughing]

  • (Keith) Cuz it wasn't enough to just put it on Instagram.

  • You needed to make sure that your smaller audience also saw it.

  • So I better put it here too because I really want people to know that I fuck my dog.

  • (Zach) Have you, uh, been to Bowie's Instagram, uh, recently?

  • (Keith) Why would I *ever* spend time on Bowie's Instagram?

  • (Zach) Woww. (Keith) I couldn't care less about a dog's social media presence. (Unless you're on the Barkschelor)

  • (Zach) I would say in general, Ned is occasionally guilty of wanting to tweet some things zeitgeist-y but having literally nothing to add to it

  • (Eugene) Sometimes I introduce my friends to some things. I taught them about a K-Pop group that I love, called Black Pink.

  • Ned, immediately sensed that Black Pink could be cool amongst the youngsters and tweets out 'BLACKPINK'.

  • Gets a lot of upvotes of people saying 'wowowowow Ned knows BLACKPINK' and then over the course of four days, tweets-

  • 'I just want to run into a Starbucks, throw coloured dust into the air, and scream BLACKPINK'.

  • (Zach) Here's the thing people are talking about, I can talk about it too. (Keith) Oh! Blah, blah, blah. Joke, joke, joke. Commentary.

  • You have a tweet, this is the most basic white girl. You just wrote 'Why can't I drink pumpkin spice lattes year-round?'

  • That's how everyone makes *fun* of basic white girls. It's not even a *true* stereotype, and you actually *are* the stereotype.

  • Every reply is a young mom.

  • *laughter* (Ned) I legit love my PSL's year-round.

  • (Eugene) Ah, see well that-that's bad.

  • *all Try Guys (excluding Ned) oofing*

  • (Keith) I think he just is a young mom, and he's always been a young mom.

  • (Zach) Every now and then, you get a real gem that's real steamy. Like this photo, that I believe I took.

  • (Keith) Yeah that's where we were playing a game

  • (Zach) This one turns me on, I like it.

  • (Keith) It's a g-- its a Hot photo. (Zach) Yeah, it's a hot pic.

  • (Zach) For how little you care, when you do care, you really deliver.

  • (Keith) This is probably the best of all of ours.

  • (Eugene) Props to you Ned, because you've never had to double explain yourself, you never backtrack a joke. You post with confidence.

  • (Keith) Just go for it. (Eugene) You just go for it.

  • (Ned) BLACKPINK! (Eugene) Exactly.

  • (Eugene) You know, you maintain an aesthetic that sometimes has an irony that I appreciate.

  • Like, I like this one. I think it's super dope. (Everyone) That was good.

  • (Keith) It's funny. (Eugene) It's beautiful and it's also funny.

  • (Keith) We're jealous of your hotness, we're jealous of your aesthetic, we're jealous of your love, and you're jealous of my indifference.

  • *laughter* (Everyone) Yeah. (Eugene) That's true.

  • Together, we would be..Chris Pratt.

  • (Everyone agrees)

  • (Keith and Zach and Ned and Bean) YEAH

  • *Outro music plays*

  • (Ned) I will say you have a very distinct aesthetic. (Eugene) But when you're nailing your dog I'm not behind it. (Ned) No.

  • (Keith) He's behind it tho! AYY [Bean barks offscreen]

(Ned) I know that the other guys do not like my photos very much, so I'm not looking forward to this.

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B1 中級 美國腔

嘗試的傢伙們互相烤著對方的Instagram'。 (The Try Guys Roast Each Other's Instagrams)

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    王致晧 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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