字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 (beeping) - Yeah let's take it outside the bedroom we're about to get nasty. - Yeah let's get real freaky. - Do you wanna pick any object and hit me with it? - Really? - Yeah. (laughing) (rock music) Welcome back to another episode of my show. I'm Glamdora, VT dubs in case you forgot it's totally cool cause we're friends right? And now that you know, you're gonna click like and subscribe and all that shit, yeah? I don't know, I'm kinda worried that I'm like not good at making new friends. I've just been like hold up in my dungeon watching reruns of Friends... ("I'll Be There for You" by Rembrandts) this episode is about friendship. We're gonna have a lot of fun today, I hope. Friends have fun together and take care of each other. I don't know, I've eaten so many. (burping) Long story short, today's episode is about making new friends. (hip-hop music) Let's face it Glam gang, new friends are hard to find. You know when you're a kid, you're just friends with anybody that's on the playground with you and once you get older you're a little more discern and you don't wanna be too discerned, you gotta be open. Any who, here's some of the worst kinds of friends to have in your life. Friends that disappear as soon as they get into a relationship, friends that are only your friend because they kind of wanna have sex with you and then when you tell them you don't want to have sex with them, they stop paying for your meals what the (beep), friends that send 40 short text messages at once instead of putting it all into one message, write it up in notes and send it when you got it figured out, friends that want to vent about their problems but don't want to listen to advice and they ignore everything else you say and then when you tell them what's going on with you they're like, actually that reminds me of me. Shut up. (beeping) Now, I'm going to make a new friend the way I always make a new friend, by inviting them to talk to me in my creepy bedroom. Any way, it's Rachel Evans. This is my guest Rachel Evans, she is best known for founding the Youtube channel Snarled in 2015. - I'm like really nervous right now. (Rachel laughing) - Why are you nervous? Why are you nervous? - Because I love you. - I guess I am low key a Succubus I do seduce people, how far do you wanna go today? - I think that's up to you, I am at your mercy. - I'm so glad that you recognize that. (Glamdora hissing) (beeping) - Tell me where are you from? - Originally I'm from Houston, Texas. (Pee-Wee singing) I used to collect bones, clean them, make little necklaces. - My god, you love bones? - I love bones. - I love bones. - Oh, cool. - Do you like boners? - I love boners. - Me too. - We have so much in common. - I know. - That's crazy. - We're like mad connecting. - Yeah wow. - I was prepared to destroy you. - Oh, wow if I had known that I wouldn't have come. - Well maybe you will come. - Hey, yeah. - Are you mistress of the night? - Oh, you know it. - Well, I have just the game for you. - Oh. - You know how in horror movies or in scary situations there's always like a weird noise, and then everyone's like eh, it's just the wind. - It's never just the wind. - It's never just the wind except for sometimes in this game it is. This is a segment called Just the Wind. - I feel like if I'm not able to tell if something is wind or not then I deserve to be murdered. In a horror movie, not in real life, please don't murder me. I feel like they wouldn't add that. (wind gusting) Whoa. - What was it? - It's just the wind. - It's just the wind. - Yay! (man groaning) - Music to my ears. - Hm, okay well this is a tough one but in all of my experience wind does not sound like it's being tortured. This is not just the wind. - You are right, it is a clip from 100% organic a Crypt TV short. (man groaning) - I hope that person's dead. (women laughing) - Okay, next question. (wind gusting) - Zioks, I think it's just the wind. - Well, you're kind of right but you're kind of wrong cause it's not just the wind, it's a tornado. (cow mooing) Okay next. (intense music) (woman screaming) (Rachel laughing) - Oh man, that is not the wind. I heard maybe some bones being crushed? - You wish. - Yeah, I do wish but I mean... - I love crushing bones, I crush some bones for breakfast and lunch... - What about dinner? What'd you have for dinner? - Cheese. - Just some cheese. (women laughing) - I'm filled up on bones, so... - Shut up. - Okay, it's not just... - No, it's a clip from Mira. (woman screaming) Next. (wind blowing) - It is just the wind. (hands clapping) Thank you. - You survived. - What now? - I have an idea, do you wanna play one of your games? - Yes, I have... - It's good to take turns that's a lesson on sharing and friendship. - Okay, so this is a great game to play on a first date or like when you're trying to get to know somebody. - Okay. - So what I like to do is soul mate match for people and their serial killers. - Oh. - Here are my questions, what kind of killer would you be? Do you like the act of killing or do you want the body afterwards? - The act. - Okay great, what's the point? Why do you want to kill? - I think it's mostly for sexual pleasure. - Sexual pleasure, love that. Okay great, so do you fancy yourself lady lover, lady hater? - Lady lover. - Lady lover, wonderful. You know what? I'm gonna go a little bit crazy with this okay? - Go crazy. Go (beep) nuts. - I'm going crazy right now. (Bruce screaming) How do you feel about the time period, like 1890s? You love? - That was one of the best decades of my life. - Okay well I'm glad that it resonates deeply with you because your serial killer is Carl Panzram. - Oh, I've met him. - Oh, Panzram? - Yes. - Oh, I love connecting old friends. - Well thank you so much for that. - No problem. - I'm having so much fun I'd like to play another game. Okay my game is called Horrigins. (spooky music) Because as you know, most of our earliest lessons about friendship come from nursery rhymes our parents and teachers tell us but it turns out most of those nursery rhymes aren't about friendship at all they're about (beep) up things. (Rachel laughing) It's not funny. - I'm excited. - It's scary. - You're right. - Book please. Alright, so what's gonna happen is I'm going to give you a summary of a nursery rhyme and you're gonna guess what nursery rhyme it is. - Oh. - And what it's about. - I'm gonna be bad at this but I'm excited to do it. - Bloody Mary burned a group of priest at the stake for attempting to overthrow her. That's what this nursery rhyme is about. - Mary had a little lamb? - No, Mary didn't have a little lamb she had three blind mice. (cheerful music) - That's what this is about? - Yes because there were three priest's that attempted to overthrow her as queen and they were burned at the stake. - Yes god. - They were referred to as blind mice because of their religious beliefs. - See how they run, I like it. - I like it too, you're fun. Okay, next question, the vikings bragged about a victory where they slaughtered thousands... - What? Okay, I have not even... (Glamdora humming) What is that? - It's London Bridge is Falling Down. - Oh. - Because in the early 1000s Olaf the second of Norwegian destroyed the London Bridge in an attack and the vikings traveled around the world making the song wide spread. - I always make a song after I kill thousands of people. - Me too. - I love a good jingle. - You gotta remember, the moments in this life. - Yeah, TBT. - Okay, next, this one is a great one and I really want you to get it. - Oh, I doubt I will but I really don't want to disappoint you. - You'd think this is about a guy getting mangled but it's actually about a big cannon. - You think it's about a guy getting mangled? - It's just about a silly little object just getting... - Humpty dumpty? (intense music) - Yes. - Really? - Yes. - I did it! - Well see, during the English Civil War there was a large cannon nicknamed Humpty. ("The Humpty Dance" by Digital Underground) Can I show you my parlor? - So soon? - Yeah let's take it outside the bedroom we're about to get nasty, yeah let's get real freaky. Do you wanna pick any object and hit me with it? - Really? - Yeah. - What am I going to hit you with? - I don't know. (object slapping) - That's really... Hey guys, thank you so much for joining us. - Do you wanna sing a song together? - I'd love to. - You start. - Okay, I think I love you. What am I so afraid of? I'm afraid that I'm not sure I (mumbles)... - Our next segment is just the tip. (mouth kissing) Here are some tips on how to be a really good friend. If your friend has food in their teeth, you have to tell them, same for a booger, don't just stare at it. Carry a spare tampon, make a new friend in the bathroom. It's actually how I got close to Stevie Nicks but turns out she wasn't on her period it was for her nose. If your friend's significant other is not good enough for them, you have to tell them, "Listen, Roger is a dork, and we can tell that you hate him, you're just scared to be alone". Don't make your friend watch early Crypt TV programming no one deserves that, and that was just the tip. (happy music) Well, Rachel... - Uh huh. - You ready to play a little parlor game in my parlor? - Yeah. - We're gonna play a game called Rad Libs. (retro music) It's unlike any game that's ever been heard of before in this century. - No, I've never played a game. So this is really huge for me. - Stop lying to me. - Okay. - Okay, adjectives. - Okay, slimy. - Yes, yes, that's a very cool adjective, spooky. Okay, number. - Six. - Okay, pretty classic, classic number. Alright, plural noun. - Apples. (Rachel laughing) Yelled it at you. - Okay, apples. Animal, don't say me. - A bearded dragon. - Exclamation. - Oof. - That's a really really good one. A Crypt character. - Hot dad from the Sunny... - Hot dad from Sunny Family cult. - Honey dad's hot father dad. - Are you okay? - Yeah, I had a melt down right there. - Do you need anything? - I'm very Jewish so this is generally how I speak all the time. - Celebrity. - Christopher Walken. - Verb. - Swimming. - Swim. - Swim that's a verb. - Like you're swimming in your own shit right now. (Rachel laughing) - Okay, body part. - Pancreas. - Restaurant. - Denny's. - Adjective. - Wet. - You are so (beep) nasty and I love it. Band. - The Cramps. - Sing a song of them. - It's all I got. - Oh, I know that song. - Yeah. (Glamdora screaming) - You're better at it than I am. - Liquid. - Nitrogen. - Body part. - Hands. - Body part. - Arm. - Okay, occupation, don't be boring. - Oh okay, financial adviser. (both laughing) - Thrilling. Noun. - A little fluff like a bunny. A bunny. - I'm gonna put down a little fluff. - Thank you. Trying to think of the word for bunny and that's what I came up with. - Verb. - Ran. - 90s celebrity. - Joey Lawrence. - Talk about your high beams whoa. - Oh, okay adjective this is your last adjective so make it good. - Oh, sweaty. - Sweaty. - Oh, are you sweaty? I love it. (Glamdora laughing) - And now, the final Rad Libs story, ready? I'm so excited. - Me too. - Once upon a time a slimy man decided to eat six apples he knew he could do it because one time he swallowed a whole bearded dragon and after shouted, "Oof". His wife who looks like the hot dad from Sunny Family cults mixed with Christopher Walken, told him that if that he didn't she would swim his pancreas in the bathroom of a Denny's, which was his favorite restaurant. When the day finally came he was wet but got himself pumped up by listening to the Cramps. - [Rachel] Yeah. (Glamdora singing) Yeah that's perfect. - [Glamdora] And rubbing liquid nitrogen on his hands - Oh no. - Oof, am I right? - Oof, indeed. - And then his arm fell off and everyone started vomiting, his wife left him for a financial advisor that smells like a little fluff. The moral of the story is don't punch if you can't run because your life will end up like Joey Lawrence and you'll die alone, anyway have a sweaty day. - Oh, thank you am I. (beeping) - We're just laughing and laughing. - Just laughing, loving, living. - I hate to kick you out. - Oh. - Since we're getting along so well girlfriend. You can plug whatever you want. - Wow, you can follow me everywhere on the internet. Twitter, Instagram at Rachel Evans or Rachel Samevans it depends on how your brain works but mainly, you can just follow me on Instagram for pictures of my butt. - Get the (beep) out of here. - Okay. - Well my little ding dongs that's the end of our episode about making new friends. I had so much fun with you today, you're all my best friends in the world and you know what best friends do right? They like, they subscribe, they buy merch, and they kill, kill. Peace out. (ominous music) God I love that video, did you love that video? If you did, click subscribe below right here on Crypt TV.
B1 中級 美國腔 THE GLAMDORA SHOW ft.RACHEL EVANS隱士文化|隱士文化|隱士電視 (THE GLAMDORA SHOW ft. RACHEL EVANS | Crypt Culture | Crypt TV) 20 1 Amy.Lin 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日 更多分享 分享 收藏 回報 影片單字