As a result, she became estranged from him and even changed her last name to disconnect from all her painful memories.

因此她逐漸與父親疏遠，甚至改了姓以切斷過去的痛苦回憶。

She says, "I don't believe that somebody's family becomes their blood, families are earned."

她說：「我不相信血濃於水的感情，家庭是需要用心經營的。」

Titles mean nothing when you never felt close to someone who was supposed to be there, but offered little to no support.

若你從未與這些本該陪伴你的人親近，而他們也幾乎不支持你，家人的稱謂根本毫無意義。

Does this sound familiar?

你也有同感嗎？

Here are 6 side effects of growing up in a toxic family.

以下 6 點是在有毒家庭中成長的副作用。

One: you have a fear of being manipulated.

第一：你害怕被操控。

Toxic families often involve some sort of daily manipulation between 2 or more family members.

有毒家庭通常會每天上演兩人或兩人以上的操控戲碼。

Manipulation is a serious form of mental and emotional abuse.

操控在精神和情緒上都是一種嚴重的傷害。

Whether you've been directly manipulated or watched someone you love be a victim to it, this can cause you to grow fearful of this toxic behavior.

不論你是直接被操控的受害者，或是你看著你愛的人被操控，這都會造成你日後害怕這樣的有毒行為。

As a result, you may become avoidant of others in order to protect yourself.

因此，你可能會疏遠他人以保護自己。

Two: you struggle with developing your self-identity.

第二：你難以建立自我認同。

People who come from toxic families often struggle with image and low self-esteem issues because they weren't nurtured to have confidence in themselves.

來自有毒家庭的人往往對自己的形象過度在意或是自尊心過低，因為他們從未被教育要有自信。

You might have grown up with parents who never respected your boundaries, often verbally abused you, or didn't allow you room for you to develop your own beliefs, dreams and interests.

你的家長可能從小到大都沒有尊重過你的個人界線、經常口頭上傷害你，或不讓你擁有發展自我、追求夢想與興趣的空間。

Consequently, you begin to see yourself in a negative light.

因此你開始以負面的角度看待自己。

Instead of having nurturing parents who helped you accept your flaws, mistakes, and failures, you faced harsh criticism on a daily basis.

你並沒有會養育你、幫助你接受自己的缺點、過錯與失敗的父母，反而你每天承受嚴厲的批評。

Without a healthy sense of esteem, one can miss out on fulfilling their talents and potential.

在不夠被尊重的情況下，你可能會錯失發揮才能和潛力的機會。

Three: you have difficulty trusting others.

第三：你難以信任他人。

Children first learn how to form relationships with others from their parents.

孩童們是先從父母身上學習如何與人建立關係的。

Toxic parents often give children a reason to close up, and they become distrustful of the world.

有毒父母往往會讓孩子自我封閉，讓他們難以信任這個世界。

When you learn to put walls up out of fear of being vulnerable, it makes it hard for you to connect and relate with others.

當你因為害怕受傷而築起心中的高牆，你就很難與他人親近。

Four: you have trouble interacting socially.

第四：你難以與他人社交互動。

Studies from Texas Woman's University shows that adults who were raised in dysfunctional families reported struggles maintaining romantic relationships and overcoming their insecurities because they feared losing control.

德克薩斯女子大學的一項研究指出，出生自家庭失常的成人據說難以維持戀愛關係，並難以克服自己的沒安全感，因為他們害怕失去控制。

As a result, many of them would deny reality and their own feelings.

因此他們多數人不願意面對現實，也不願面對自己的情感。

When you grow up in a household that exposes you to neglect, abuse and mistreatment, the last thing you want to do is get close to people who might let you down or betray you.

若你的家庭讓你從小到大都被疏於照顧、使你遭辱罵或虐待，你當然不會想接近可能會讓你失望或背叛你的人。

Five: you have anxiety overload.

第五：你備感焦慮。

According to a study published in The Journal Of Behavior Therapy And Experimental Psychiatry, people who were raised in a dysfunctional household are more likely to be diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder.

根據一篇刊登在「行為治療和實驗精神病學」雜誌裡的研究，生長在失常家庭中的人更容易被診斷出廣泛性焦慮症。

As a result, children who grew up in a toxic environment are at risk of developing problems with their academics, social life and impulse control, because their brain is continuously exposed to cortisol, the stress hormone.

因此在這樣的有毒環境中生長，孩子們面臨的問題包含學業發展、社交生活和衝動控制，因為他們的腦袋正持續暴露於皮質醇壓力賀爾蒙之中。

Symptoms of Generalized Anxiety Disorder include headaches, irritability, muscle tension, sweating, constant worrying and feelings of restlessness.

廣泛性焦慮症的徵狀包含頭痛、易怒、肌肉緊繃、流汗、持續性著急以及焦躁不安。

Six: you deal with the trauma by going through emotional cutoff or estrangement from your family.

第六：你會對家人情緒切割或與家人疏遠，以處理自己的心理創傷。

Once children from toxic families grow up into adults who can financially support themselves, they often experience emotional cutoff or estrangement to disconnect from their unresolved family conflict.

來自有毒家庭的小孩一但成長成人並經濟獨立，往往會對家人做情緒切割或和他們疏離，以遠離家庭未解決的紛爭。

Emotional cutoff, coined by American psychiatrist Marie Bowen, is a process that involves either physically distancing oneself from a family member or avoiding sensitive topics in a conversation to reduce anxiety.

情緒切割一詞首次由美國精神科醫師 Marie Bowen 所使用，是一個減少焦慮感的過程，其中包含行為上與一位家庭成員疏遠或避免與家人談論敏感的主題。

Some people choose to disconnect from their family members because it's better than drowning along with someone who hasn't changed or been treated for their unhealthy behavior.

有些人選擇和家庭成員疏離，因為比起與無法改變或待你不善的家人沈溺在一起，疏遠他們反而比較好。

Have you experienced these side effects?

這些副作用有發生在你身上嗎？

We know that sometimes it might seem impossible to recover from them, but we're here to offer a safe, judgment free space where you can talk about what you've faced.

我們知道要從這些症狀復原有時看似不可能，但我們在這裡提供一個安全、零批評的空間，讓你能暢所欲言自己的遭遇。

If you're feeling brave, please share your story with us down below.

若你勇於分享，歡迎在底下留言告訴我們你的故事。

Also, don't forget to subscribe for more content from Psych2Go and check out our Patreon.

還有，別忘記訂閱 Psych2Go 才能看到更多內容，也記得來我們的 Patreon 看看。

Thanks for watching!

謝謝收看！