of the best traits that you could have in your life,

一生中最棒的特質

but being a cocky person is one of the worst traits

而自大是人一生中

that you can have in your life,

最糟糕的特質

and there is a fine line between being cocky

自信和自大

and being confident, and in this video,

有明確的區別，這部影片

we are going to discuss the major differences

將討論自信和自大的

between these two traits.

主要差異

Confidence comes from a very authentic and whole place.

自信是非常全面而且真實的

Cockiness is not authentic, and it's based in insecurity.

自大並不真實，而是因為不安全感而產生

It's more about making other people think

自大比較像是讓其他人認為

that you're confident

你很有自信

as opposed to actually just being confident,

而不是真正有自信

which is why cocky people tend to talk a lot.

這就是自大的人通常多話的原因

A common trait that a lot

自大的人普遍的特徵是

of cocky people exhibit is being overly loud

他們會在某些社交場合說話時

in certain social situations.

過於大聲

When someone disagrees with a cocky person,

當有人不同意自大者的想法時

they will try and overpower

自大的人會試圖利用大聲說話

and intimidate them by being loud with the hopes

來壓過你的聲音並威嚇你，希望

that the other person will simply submit to them.

反對者能夠直接接受他的想法

The reason why this happens is

之所有會發生這種情形

because the cocky person is not comfortable

是因為自大的人不願意承認

with the idea of being wrong,

自己的錯誤

and they are not open to new ideas.

他們也不願意接納別人的想法

Because of this mindset, it's very difficult

因為有這種心理特徵

for a cocky person to grow and learn.

自大的人很難成長或是學習

Also, cocky people tend to make more mistakes,

而且，自大的人通常比較會犯錯

and they will start getting a little sloppy

也會因為自己的過度自信和不謙虛

because of their overconfidence and lack of humility.

開始變得玻璃心、愛發牢騷

Another very common trait

自大的人還有

of cocky people is not giving other people

一種常見的特質，就是不願將成功

the credit they deserve.

歸功於他人的幫助

When a confident and humble person accepts an award,

自信、謙虛的人得獎時

they will almost always acknowledge the people

幾乎都會提到一路上

that helped them get there.

幫助自己的人

A great example of a very arrogant person is Kanye West.

關於自大，最有名的人就是肯伊．威斯特

If you have ever watched him accept an award,

如果你看過他上台領獎、發表感言

you will see that he takes all of the credit,

你就知道他將所有功勞歸功於自己

and he never acknowledges anyone else.

從來不會提到其他人的幫助

This is because he wants everybody else to think

因為他想讓大家認為一切的成就

that he did everything himself.

都是他一人達成的

Confident people do not have an inflated view of themselves.

自信的人不會放大自己的成功

In fact, they will feel bad

事實上，自信的人

if they didn't acknowledge the people

如果沒有在發表感言時提到一路幫助過他的人

that helped them reach their goal.

反而會感到不安

Another big difference between being cocky and confidence is

自大和自信另一大不同是

that cocky people never like

自大的人從不會

to acknowledge their weaknesses.

承認自己的錯誤

A great example of this is

有個好例子可以形容這種情形

when a cocky person is incorrect is about something.

當自大的人對某件事想法有誤時

They will tell themselves stories, rationalizing

他們會編造故事、合理化

why they thought the way they did,

自己的想法

and they will often find someone else to blame

而且經常會砲轟其他人

instead of just admitting when they are wrong.

而不是承認自己的錯誤

Confident people do not need to do this

自信的人不會這樣

because they know it's okay if they are wrong, and they know

因為他們會承認自己的錯誤，也知道

that being wrong will not reduce their self-worth

自己的錯誤並不會損害自我價值

or their value to the other people around them.

以及身旁對他的評價

When you are confident,

自信的人

you can evaluate your own skills and self-worth honestly.

會誠實地評估自己的能力以及自我價值

You can say to yourself, "I need to improve in this area,"

自信的人會說：「我需要改善這方面」

and you will put the work in in order to improve.

並會為求進步而付諸行動

Of course, you have opinions of certain topics,

當然，自信的人對於特定話題有自己的想法

but you're always open to the opinions of others.

但也會接納他人的意見

Getting another person's opinion will either strengthen

接納別人的意見可以強化自己的

your own belief or make you change your own opinions

想法，或改由相信他人

into one that is more correct.

較正確的想法

It's a win-win situation,

這是雙贏的局面

and cocky people do not think like this.

但自大的人不會這麼想

Confidence is not something that you just get overnight.

自信不是一夜間就能得到的

It's something that you have to cultivate

自信是需要隨時間培養

over time by pushing yourself to go outside

並督促自己走出

of your comfort zone.

舒適圈

If the idea of approaching someone

如果不敢和陌生人交談

during the day is terrifying, then you should do it.

那你應該勇敢試試看

If the idea of asking someone on the street what time it is,

如果不敢在路上問路人：「現在幾點？」

then you should do it.

那你應該試試看

You cannot think your way to confidence.

自信不能靠想像獲得

You have to feel your way there.

而需努力培養、實踐

In the words of the great American philosopher,

誠如美國知名哲學家

Ralph Waldo Emerson,

拉爾夫．沃爾多．愛默生所說

"May you always do the thing you are afraid to do."

「願每個人都能勇敢跨出舒適圈。」

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(slow music)

(緩慢的音樂)