It's just a movie.

那只是部電影而已。

You see, Natalie, life's not a fairy tale.

聽著，娜塔莉，人生不是童話。

Girls like us don't get that.

我們這種女生永遠不會得到那些的。

But, why?

為什麼?

Well, look in the mirror, doll, we're no Julia Roberts.

看看鏡子，親愛的，我們不是茱莉亞羅勃茲。

♪ Pretty woman ♪

♪ 美麗女人 ♪

What are we talking about?

現在在聊啥？

Natalie is saying that romantic comedies are bad.

娜塔莉說浪漫喜劇爛透了。

All those movies are lies set to terrible pop songs.

那些電影不過是為糟糕流行歌編造的謊言。

I think people would have an easier time seeing you if you were a little more open.

你如果更敞開心胸一點，其他人跟你相處會更愉快的。

Hey. I'm Jack.

嘿，我是傑克。

Natalie.

我是娜塔莉。

Give me the purse.

給我你的包！

Why does this shit always happen to me?

為什麼這種破事總是發生在我身上？

Where am I?

我在哪？

You're in the emergency room.

你在急診室。

This isn't an emergency room, this is a Williams Sonoma.

這哪是急診室，這裡是威廉斯所羅莫 (知名家具行)。

It looks like somebody's put a beauty filter across New York City.

好像有人幫紐約市套了一層美顏濾鏡一樣。

9-1-1, what's your emergency?

911，您需要申報的緊急案件是？

Someone's broken in to my apartment and they've taken everything, and replaced it all with much nicer stuff.

有人闖進我的公寓，搶走所有東西，然後全部換成了更好的東西。

So your emergency is that your apartment is too big and you have every shoe you could ever want?

所以，你的緊急情況是你的公寓太大，然後你有所有想要的鞋？

- Yeah, exactly, that's what I... - Bye.

- 沒錯，這就是我的意思… - 掰。

I think I might be going crazy.

我覺得我好像瘋了。

I hit my head really hard and I woke up in this alternate universe.

我撞到頭，然後醒來就在這個異世界了。

And now I have a gay sidekick who's setting gay rights back, like, a hundred years.

現在我還有同性戀跟班，他根本直接讓同性戀平權倒退一百年。

I love working the legs.

我愛腿部運動。

Jesus!

天啊！

And guys look me in the eyes.

男生全都直視我。

You're quite beguiling, aren't you?

你還蠻迷人的，是吧？

Are you feeling what I'm feeling?

我們有相同感受嗎？

No.

沒有。

Oh, my God.

我的天啊。

I think I'm trapped in a...

我覺得我被困在了…

My life's become a mother [truck beep] romantic comedy.

我的人生變成一部他Ｘ的戀愛喜劇了！

And it's PG-13!

還是保護級的！

Okay, booch, what's the update?

寶寶，有最新消息嗎？

I have to get a man to fall in love with me.

我需要找個男人談戀愛。

Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Yes!

砰！砰！砰！砰！砰！讚啦！

I'm Josh.

我叫賈許。

That is such a beautiful name.

真是好聽的名字。

Good morning, beautiful!

早安，美人！

Last night was amazing.

昨晚真是太讚了。

I don't think we actually did anything. It just cut to the next morning.

我們什麼都沒發生，直接就跳到了隔天早上了。

What?

什麼？

- Just get back here. - Okay.

- 你先回床上。 - 好呦。

Good morning, beautiful!

早安，美女！

Last night was amazing. Natalie, I...

昨晚真是太讚了，娜塔莉，我…