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  • I have had zero positive experiences.

    我幾乎沒什麼經驗

  • I go to the bathroom and I pull out my phone,

    我回到房間並拿出我的電話

  • and he has texted me,

    他傳來簡訊

  • “I hope you're enjoying your peecess.”

    「我希望妳能享受正在上廁所的過程。」

  • It may seem like there couldn't be a worse time to be alive and single.

    似乎沒有比活著卻單身還要更糟糕的時候了

  • And then texted me asking me if he could come home with me.

    然後他傳訊息給我,問我可不可以跟我一起回家

  • Just a slew of, like, poor dates, and, like, mediocre dates, and s***ty dates.

    只是一堆,比如,糟糕的約會、無聊的約會以及爛透了的約會

  • But the truth is that for as long as it's been around, dating has always sucked.

    但真相是只要有約會這件事,就會很糟糕

  • It's the late 1800s.

    這是 19 世紀末

  • These are the presidents.

    這些是總統們

  • This is how people dress.

    這就是人們穿著的方式

  • This is the music they listen to.

    這是他們聽的音樂

  • And this is how single people get together.

    這就是單身人士聚在一起的方式

  • I see you've already chosen your corner.

    我看到你已經選擇了你要站的地方了

  • Better known ascalling,” it's the predominant mode of courtship among the middle class.

    這種方式通常稱為「呼喚」,為中產階級主要的求愛模式

  • The basic setup of calling was that a woman would have hours when she was receiving callers

    呼喚的基本設定就是,女士會待在家幾個小時來招待

  • at home.

    追求者

  • This is Moira Weigel.

    這位是 Moira Weigel

  • I'm a junior fellow at Harvard University and the author of a book called Labor of Love:

    我是哈佛大學大三的學生,也是一本名為「愛的勞動」書籍的作者:

  • The Invention of Dating.

    約會的發明

  • The basic script is that a man shows up at your house,

    基礎的劇本就是男生會出現在妳家

  • asks whether you will see him,

    問妳要不要跟他約會

  • and then you sit together in a parlor and sort of spend time together,

    然後妳們一起坐在客廳,共度時光

  • with either direct or sort of from-the-next-room family supervision.

    伴隨著直接或間接來自家人的監督

  • Sounds super hot.

    聽起來很火辣

  • At the time, 75% of Americans lived in small towns or on farms.

    在那個時代,75% 的美國人住在小城鎮或是農場

  • If you think meeting someone at a bar is tough,

    如果你認為要在酒吧認識另一半很困難

  • try finding a spouse in a town where you'd only encounter

    試著在你有機會遇到你一生中潛在配偶的小鎮中

  • a handful of potential partners in your lifetime.

    尋找你的伴侶

  • And while it may seem like the way we date is dictated by things like love and affection,

    雖然我們約會的方式看起來像是由愛和感情之類的東西決定的

  • it was actually driven by something far less romantic:

    但它實際上是由一些不那麼浪漫的東西所驅動的:

  • In America in the 1880s, 1890s, you have these floods of migration both from the countryside

    在 19 世紀 80 及 90 年代的美國,有來自鄉村

  • to the city

    的移民

  • and from other countries to the United States.

    或來自別的國家的移民

  • As the country industrializes, urban populations explode.

    隨著國家工業化,都市人口大增

  • The population of New York increases seven times between 1850 and 1900,

    紐約人口在 1850 年到 1900 年之間增加了 7 倍

  • and Philadelphia's goes up 12 times.

    而費城的人口增加 12 倍

  • You only have people going out into public spaces and meeting and mixing in this way

    人們出外之公共場合見面及交流,這種方式

  • that we call dating

    我稱之為約會

  • once you have lots of young people moving to cities

    一旦有很多年輕人移到都市

  • and especially women entering the paid workforce.

    尤其是女性進到職場工作

  • Many women step outside their homes to work for the first time,

    許多女性踏出家門初次開始工作

  • and that gives them exposure to potential suitors in a way they never had before.

    這賦予她們從未有過的,能夠遇見自己潛在另一伴的機會

  • Courtship shifted from something that happened in private, tea and supervised small talk

    求愛的方式從私下、喝茶以及在家由家人監督下的

  • in your home,

    小小交談

  • to activities that happened in public:

    變成會在公共場合下進行的活動:

  • going to restaurants, movies, and amusement parks.

    去餐廳、看電影以及去遊樂園玩

  • From that point on, in order to meet somebody, you had to spend money,

    從那時開始,你為了要與某個人出去,你必須要開始花錢

  • and dating became entangled with the economy.

    而約會變成與經濟狀況息息相關

  • After World War II, the American economy flourished.

    在第二次世界大戰後,美國經濟蓬勃發展

  • Between 1940 and 1960, the GDP soared from $200 billion to $500 billion.

    從 1940 年到 1960 年,國內生產總值從 2000 億美元飆升至 5000 億美元

  • The economic boom after World War II in the United States means that young people have

    第二次世界大戰後美國的經濟繁榮意味著年輕人

  • much more disposable income than they've ever had.

    擁有的可支配收入遠遠超過以往

  • By 1956, there were 13 million teens with an average income of $10.55 per week.

    到 1956 年,有 1300 萬青少年,平均每週收入 10.55 美元

  • That's the same amount of disposable income an entire family had 15 years prior.

    這是 15 年前一整個家庭的收入

  • And they wanted to spend it.

    所以他們會想要花錢

  • Unlike previous generations that were expected to help support their families,

    與上一世代不同,有幫助維持家庭生計的渴望

  • this new generation had time for leisure and recreation.

    這新一代的年輕人有時間進行休閒娛樂

  • This consumer-driven period was about affluence,

    這個消費者充斥的時期是富裕的

  • and the dating scene closely reflected that economic prosperity:

    而約會的方式密切反映經濟的繁榮:

  • shiny new cars, rock 'n' roll, drive-in movie theatersand don't forget about

    閃亮的新車、搖滾樂、可開車進去的電影院 ─ 不要忘了穩定地

  • going steady.

    和對方交往

  • There was no looking back after that ...

    那個時候過去了....

  • a disposable income and access to technology democratized dating for decades to come.

    可支配收入、科技的普及、民主的約會,在幾十年後到來

  • We're riding on the internet, cyberspace set free, hello, virtual reality.

    我們在網際網路裡,自由的網絡空間,哈囉,虛擬現實

  • Access to the internet meant access to more people.

    進入到網際網路代表著能夠認識更多人

  • From 1995 to 2005, the number of internet users worldwide increased from 16 million

    從 1995 年到 2005 年,全球網際網路用戶數量從 1600 萬增加到

  • to almost 1 billion.

    將近 10 億

  • As with every previous era of dating history,

    如同先前提到每個約會的歷史時代一樣

  • there's sort of this new economic sphere, and romance and flirtation becomes part of

    這是一個新的經濟領域,浪漫和調情成為其能商業化的

  • how it gets commercialized.

    其中一個原因

  • So chat rooms about sex or the opportunity to flirt with people online is a big part

    所以能夠談有關性的聊天室或線上調情的機會

  • of what's appealing about AOL.

    是美國線上主要吸引人的地方

  • By 1999, there were already 2,500 dating websites.

    到了 1999 年,已經有 2500 個約會網站

  • But the big moment came around 2010, when mobile phones started changing the way people

    但重大的時刻是在於 2010 年左右,因為手機改變人們交流

  • connect.

    的方式

  • Because in the '90s, I think there's still this sense that the internet is sort of, you

    因為在 90 年代,我認為還存在著網際網路是一種,你知道的

  • know, it's cyberspace.

    網路空間的概念

  • It's this other universe that lives in your desktop and that you go to sometimes and chat

    這是個存在於你桌上的一個宇宙,讓你有時可以去造訪

  • with a stranger.

    並與陌生人聊天

  • Once everyone is carrying a computer on their person at almost all times and our physical

    一旦每個人時時刻刻身邊都帶著一台電腦,而我們實際及虛擬的生活都交織在一起

  • and digital lives are interwoven, that really changes the dynamics.

    這真的會改變現階段的平衡

  • It's no surprise that dating piggybacked on this explosive growth.

    約會受到這爆炸式的成長影響並不意外

  • Dating apps, dating apps, dating apps.

    約會 app、約會 app、約會 app

  • According to a recent survey, 77% of Americans own a smartphone and 15% of American adults

    根據最近的一項調查,77% 的美國人擁有智能手機和 15% 的美國成年人

  • use dating apps.

    有使用約會 app

  • Grindr launched in 2009, Tinder in 2012, and now there are hundreds of dating apps to choose from.

    Grindr 於 2009 年推出,Tinder 於 2012 年推出,現在有數百種約會 app 可供選擇

  • So meeting new people has never been easier.

    所以認識新朋友再簡單不過

  • But does that make us any happier?

    但這有讓我們比以往更快樂嗎 ?

  • Dating is kind of a necessary evil.

    約會是一種必要做的罪惡的事

  • The thing about online dating is that you don't trust anyone.

    你不需要相信任何人就能進行線上約會

  • You get to pin your top hate or like, and this guyhates abstinence.”

    你可以標記你最討厭或最喜歡的人,像是這個人「討厭禁慾」

  • Every new technology, every new kind of social practice, inspires anxiety

    每一種新科技、新的社會實踐

  • about how folks are meeting and pairing up.

    都會激發人們對人們如何認識相見和配對的焦慮

  • So dating still kind of sucks.

    所以約會一樣是爛透了

  • But that's nothing new.

    但這並不是什麼新鮮事

  • My name's Tian, I'm gonna be 25.

    我是 Tian,我將要 25 歲了

  • I'm looking for someone who...

    我在尋找

  • comes from a long line of European nobility.

    有歐洲貴族血脈的人

  • Absolutely, that is critical for me.

    顯然地,那對我非常重要

  • Someone whose family has land holdings

    一個其家族擁有,最理想的是,

  • across, ideally, the south of France.

    南法土地所有權的人

  • And will take me vacationing in their summer castle.

    然後帶我去他夏季的城堡中度假

  • I'm interested in going to bed early, to wake up even earlier.

    我喜歡早一點上床睡覺,早一點醒來

I have had zero positive experiences.

我幾乎沒什麼經驗

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