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  • -What animals did you bring for us tonight?

  • -We've got some really good ones.

  • -Don't you dare. -It's gonna be awesome.

  • I'm starting off with something very cute and cuddly.

  • This is Giselle. -Oh [bleep]

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • Come on, brother. -Kevin, stop.

  • -Come on, man. -It's all good.

  • -No surprises. -Come on, man.

  • -It's an ostrich. It's a baby ostrich.

  • -You can kiss my ass.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Kevin. -No.

  • No, brother. No.

  • -It's a baby -- -Look at that.

  • -Look how cute! -She's so cute.

  • Her name's Giselle. Look at her.

  • Do you want to come pet her? -What is that noise?

  • -Yeah, well, the babies, they make this little chirping noise.

  • [ Ostrich chirping ] Isn't that amazing?

  • -You know what she's saying?

  • "I want some little black man." [ Laughter ]

  • That's what she's saying.

  • No, brother.

  • -That is -- Now, how old is this baby?

  • -Well, this one's only 2 months old.

  • But they'll grow to be the biggest

  • and most powerful bird on the planet.

  • They can weigh over 260 pounds.

  • They can go 40 miles an hour.

  • They're so fast. It's amazing.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Good luck. Good luck.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -At this time, I want to say,

  • I will not be the fastest thing running.

  • [ Laughter ] I'm definitely gonna get caught.

  • -Come on in, come on in, pet her.

  • -I don't need to pet her. I can see it, that's cool.

  • I can see it from here. [ Laughter ]

  • -Isn't she amazing? So, these little ones,

  • they actually -- they have to be really tough and strong,

  • because anything would try to eat these in the wild.

  • So they have to be really good at fending for themselves.

  • And those legs, that's where they get all the power.

  • They can easily kill a lion with those legs.

  • They're that powerful.

  • [ Laughter ] But once they reach full size --

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Aren't they just amazing? They're remarkable creatures.

  • They really are. -Yeah, yeah.

  • -Yeah, they're great. -Are you sure --

  • Are you sure you don't -- -Did you bring anything else?

  • -She's really cuddly. -You can --

  • You can put that one back. [ Laughter ]

  • -All right. Thanks, Giselle.

  • -Oh, my God. -That's amazing.

  • All right. -You got it?

  • [ Cheering and applause ]

  • All right. -That was fun.

  • That was really good. So for this one --

  • -Are they -- -Yeah?

  • -Are they all coming out from this side?

  • -No, no. Some are coming from this side.

  • -They're coming in from all directions.

  • -All right. No, we won't surprise you.

  • Kevin. -It's all good, it's all good.

  • -It's all good. -All right, for this one,

  • Jimmy, I want you to come around, as well.

  • I want you to come around to the front.

  • Let's all stand up for this one.

  • Let's get ready. Okay.

  • -Wait, wait. -So, for this is one --

  • This is LeBron, and LeBron is absolutely awesome.

  • I'm gonna grab him now.

  • You are gonna love him.

  • So, all right. Come on out, LeBron.

  • -No, stay, Kevin, no! We're in it together, man.

  • -All right, Kevin, this is LeBron.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Kevin, you have to just get over your fears.

  • You have to hold the snake.

  • -You can hold him. He is so nice.

  • -You can hold him. He's nice.

  • And get over your fears. -Come on in.

  • -Come in, Kevin, come in! Come in!

  • -Let me tell you something. -No, Kevin.

  • -It ain't gonna happen. [ Laughter ]

  • -Dude, Kevin, just close your eyes and trust me.

  • You'll do fine. -Let Jimmy do it first.

  • Go ahead, Jimmy. You do it first.

  • -We've got another one -- -[Bleep]

  • Come on in. We've got another one.

  • We've actually -- -Oh, no!

  • -So this is Elvis. [ Laughter ]

  • -Come on, man. Come on.

  • Come on, man. [ Laughter ]

  • Come on, man.

  • Come on, man. [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Go ahead, man.

  • -That's awesome.

  • -All right. Okay.

  • Kevin, if I do it, you got to do it.

  • -So this is LeBron and Elvis. -Aha. Ah.

  • -So, you're holding Elvis there.

  • Now, how awesome is that? That's perfect.

  • You just hold him there. -Yeah.

  • -He'll just glide right through your hands.

  • So, now Jimmy's -- Jimmy's on it.

  • He is amazing. Kevin, it's your turn now.

  • Here you go. [ Laughter ]

  • They're totally fine. -Kevin, it's easy.

  • -They're the coolest snakes. They really are.

  • -Just try it. Please, just do it.

  • [ Cheering and applause ]

  • Where are they from?

  • -Oh.

  • [ Audience chanting "Kevin!" ]

  • -Let me tell you what I've gotten really good at

  • in my life.

  • Saying no.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • No. -That's okay.

  • -Jimmy, you hold it. It looks good.

  • -It's really cool.

  • So, these snakes, they're kingsnakes.

  • California banded kingsnakes.

  • -You know how to deal with big snakes.

  • -Have you seen his Tommy Johns ad?

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • You got take a look at this picture.

  • You'll see what I'm talking about.

  • All right, he's not gonna do it. -Just pat them.

  • -Does it -- Does it -- Do they bite?

  • Seriously? -Well, they can bite.

  • -You lost me at "well." -Okay, all right.

  • -I was about to do it. Did you see me?

  • I was about to go. -Yeah, no, all right.

  • -"Do they bite?" "Well, uh..."

  • -They can eat venomous snakes.

  • They're not venomous, but they can easily

  • take down a venomous snake, no problem at all.

  • -Is there a chance that it could bite me?

  • -How about this? You do the next animal.

  • -You do the next one. -It's gonna be worse.

  • I'd rather try this. [ Laughter ]

  • I'd rather try this. -It won't be worse.

  • -It's not gonna crawl up me? -It's not gonna crawl.

  • -I'll just hold it in my hand. -Yeah, put your hands out.

  • Exactly. Exactly, that's it.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • That's it.

  • -Yo, I'm serious. Listen to me.

  • -You'll be good.

  • -If it start moving, come get the snake.

  • -I'm right there for you.

  • -I'll fight you, man. I will fight you.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I promise you, I'mma a swing on you

  • if you don't get the snake.

  • -Hurry up, make a decision,

  • 'cause my snake's getting nervous.

  • -So, what I do? So, I'mma go stand?

  • -Yep. So you can stand right here

  • and then put your hands out.

  • I'll be with you the whole way.

  • -Hey, man, on my mother, if this snake...

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -So, they're beautiful animals.

  • -Get it so it don't -- Aah!

  • -So, put your hands out like that.

  • -My snake's getting weird. -I can't do it, I can't do it.

  • -I can't do it, Jimmy. -Next one, next one.

  • Next one. We'll try the next one.

  • -Y'all saw me try, guys. I tried. I'm sorry.

  • -My snake stopped moving, so I'm getting --

  • -Yeah, you're doing great. -All right.

  • -That's LeBron and Elvis. -LeBron and Elvis.

  • Love them so much. Thank you.

  • Thank you. [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Got it? -Yo.

  • Hey, Jimmy...

  • My ass is sweating, Jimmy.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I'm being 100% honest.

  • I got so much sweat dripping down my ass right now.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I'm so nervous. -Holy moly.

  • -I'm so nervous. -Holy mackerel.

  • All right, all right, here we go.

  • All right, what do we have? What's the next thing?

  • Kevin, get up here. Get up here.

  • You have to, come on. Trust me.

  • Get up here, dude. -I'm so nervous.

  • -Come up here. Please.

  • -You can sit down for this one. -Sit down for this.

  • I'll stay with you. Come on.

  • -It's cute, it's fluffy. This one's little.

  • -It's cute and fluffy and little.

  • Please, come on. -Go on that side.

  • -No. -Absolutely fine.

  • -I don't like how y'all trapping me.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • I feel like y'all trying to close me in.

  • Go here. Let me go right here.

  • -All right. So, for this one, though...

  • Now, Kevin...

  • Kevin, you can hold this one. -Okay.

  • -But for this one, I just need to make sure

  • you're really nice and calm

  • and don't move too much for this one.

  • And also, don't breathe on it too much,

  • 'cause it'll set it off.

  • -Close your eye, close your eye. -You'll be fine.

  • -Before you pull it out,

  • it don't sound like this is the animal for me.

  • I don't think -- [ Laughter ]

  • I don't think this is the one that --

  • -Jimmy's handled something similar to this.

  • He's handled a similar species. -Yeah, I got it.

  • -Close your eyes, put your hands out.

  • -No, no. -Just trust me, Kevin.

  • -Listen... [ Laughter ]

  • -No, it won't come from behind, I promise.

  • -Get it out and let me see it. -Okay.

  • -No, no, no! Don't -- No, no, no.

  • Just close your eyes, and please, Kevin --

  • -I can't. -Kevin, please, just trust me.

  • -It's not gonna happen, Jimmy. [ Laughter ]

  • -Close your eyes. Close your eyes.

  • -Don't get behind me. Don't get behind me.

  • -Nothing behind you. -Don't get behind me.

  • -No, I'm in front of you.

  • I'm just saying, if you close your eyes

  • and put your hands out --

  • -This is how black people die in a horror movie.

  • [ Laughter ] -Not true!

  • That's not true at all.

  • I'll telling you what. Just go like that

  • and close your eyes,

  • and he's gonna put something fluffy on your hand.

  • -I got to see it, brother. I got to see it.

  • -No, no, no. I -- I will --

  • No, I'm not -- [ Laughter ]

  • Just try. Trust me.

  • -Jimmy, there's no -- I can't.

  • It's not in me. I'm sorry.

  • Physically, I'm not capable of processing

  • what you're saying right now. [ Laughter ]

  • I can't. I'm sorry.

  • I love you, and it's your birthday.

  • Just pull it out. Let me see what it is first.

  • -Okay. -All right, okay.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Okay, now it is -- It's so --

  • It's got the cutest little face, little beady eyes.

  • It's awesome. You'll love it.

  • -Wait, wait, wait. Beady?

  • -Yeah, like -- You'll see, you'll see.

  • -Okay, go, go, go. Let's see what --

  • Is it fast? -No, no, not at all.

  • -She's really cute.

  • Her name's Big Red, and she is adorable.

  • She's my favorite -- my favorite animal tonight.

  • -What's taking him so long, Jimmy?

  • -I don't know. [ Laughter ]

  • -Jimmy, what's taking him so long over there, Jimmy?

  • -So, this is Big Red. [ Audience gasps ]

  • -Stay. Stay. -She's a red knee tarantula.

  • -Stay. -She's so cool.

  • [ Laughter, cheers, applause ]

  • -Hey.

  • Hey, man. -Are you sure?

  • -No, no, no. No, no, no, no. No.

  • -She's beautiful. She's great.

  • -I'm behind you.

  • Stay.

  • You better stay your ass over there, man.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -He's 14 years old. -Hey, I don't care, Jimmy.

  • -He's 14 years old. -I don't care, Jimmy.

  • -He's 14. -Okay.

  • It's your birthday. -Yeah.

  • -You should hold that spider.

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • It's your birthday, man. -No.

  • -Oh, my God. Go ahead, Jimmy.

  • -Yeah. -Go ahead.

  • -Come on in. -That look like it jump.

  • That look like -- [ Laughter ]

  • Yeah, that ain't gonna happen for me, bro.

  • -They're really cool.

  • They're the most amazing spider ever.

  • They are my favorite. They're so cool.

  • So, now what you want do is... -Oh.

  • -...if you want, you can put your hands out.

  • So put both hands out there on the desk.

  • -Oh. -You'll be fine.

  • Seriously, you'll be all good.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -There we go. -Oh!

  • Ohh!

  • Ohh [bleep]

  • Oh, my God!

  • -That was perfect. That's great!

  • She loves you. -Oh, Jimmy, I'm nervous for you.

  • [ Laughter ] I'm nervous for you, man.

  • -Be quiet, be quiet. -Is it -- Is it --

  • Is it, like, the loud noises, what would it do?

  • -Oh, my gosh. Do not even make a loud noise.

  • -As long as you don't breathe on it or anything, you'll be good.

  • [ Laughter ] You'll be fine.

  • -It's just that breath that they don't like.

  • -You're getting too close now. [ Laughter ]

  • He's not gonna know whether it's my breath or your breath.

  • -The only thing that could upset that is breath?

  • -That's it. That's it, totally.

  • -Kevin, get away. -Jimmy!

  • [ Laughter ] -There you go.

  • -But their venom is fine. -It's fine.

  • -Jimmy!

  • -Oh, my goodness! Please, I'm not kidding.

  • I can -- No. Oh, my God!

  • -You're all right. You're all right.

  • -Oh, my God. Please get him away.

  • -There, I got him. -Oh, my God.

  • Dude. -There we go.

  • Are you sure, Kevin? Are you sure?

  • -I'm gonna kill you! [ Laughter ]

  • Dude, that was the scariest thing

  • that ever happened in my lifetime!

  • What is wrong with you?! Gaah!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Ugh. -[ Laughing ]

  • Oh, God. Oh, my God.

  • Oh. [ Laughing ]

  • -Oh, God. All right.

  • -I started yelling, y'all didn't look at Jimmy's face.

  • -Can you put that away?

  • -Are you sure, mate?

  • -What else did you bring? You have one more.

  • -Fair enough. -One more animal.

  • -Okay, we've got one more animal.

  • I'm just gonna put her away. [ Laughter ]

  • -Jimmy, I said, "Jimmy!"

  • You said, "Take it, take it, take it, take it, take it!"

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -All right, what do we got? What do we got?

  • What are we doing? -What you got?

  • -So, for this last animal, we're all gonna come down here.

  • We're gonna join you down here. -Well, I'mma go up here.

  • [ Laughter and applause ]

  • I'mma go up here. -Dude, no.

  • -I'mma go up here. -No, all right, come on.

  • It's gonna be fine. This'll be fine, here we go.

  • -I don't like nothing standing behind me.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -This one's gonna be good.

  • I promise you, this one will be awesome.

  • -Okay. -So this one's name is --

  • He's actually got a very cute name.

  • It's Squire. And Squire is a falcon.

  • -A what? -He's a falcon.

  • All right, so come on out, Squire.

  • There we go. -Come on now.

  • -He's a lanner falcon. -Come on, now.

  • -They are beautiful birds. They really are.

  • -You know what birds like? Small objects.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Wow. -So, they use those feet --

  • They've got really strong talons, those killing claws.

  • That's what they use to actually hunt their prey.

  • They're really quick, they're keyed in to movement.

  • So, what I want to do with this one --

  • They're amazing at flying.

  • So I'm thinking, if you two want to go up into the audience

  • and we'll get this one flying to you.

  • [ Cheers and applause ] Does that sound good?

  • What do you reckon? -Come on.

  • -Okay, so -- [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -Yeah.

  • -No. No!

  • -You stay here, Kevin. -No.

  • -You stay here. [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -I'll stay here. -All right.

  • -I'll head up this side. -You go up that one?

  • -You go, Jimmy. -Okay, I'll stand in.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -Thank you. Oh, wow.

  • -Gonna put it down to your side to start...

  • -Okay. So, what we're gonna do is,

  • I'm gonna call him over, and once he's ready,

  • he'll fly over.

  • Make sure you don't put your hands up, though,

  • 'cause those talons are very sharp.

  • -Oh, my God. -Kevin, don't move.

  • Kevin, put your hands down.

  • -Jimmy, I saw this in a movie. -Kevin, put your --

  • -That's how people die!

  • -Aww! Awesome! How cool is that?

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • -Good job. Awesome, huh?

  • Okay. Jimmy, it's your turn.

  • [ Applause ]

  • Hey, look over there, Squire. It's Jimmy.

  • There you go. Ooh, he's on you now.

  • There we go. He's on.

  • Oh, awesome.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Nice.

  • -Wow.

  • -Okay.

  • So, what we're gonna do, we're gonna keep this

  • nice and still just like that. Just like that.

  • Perfect. You're good.

  • So just keep that one still. [ Laughter and applause ]

  • -She's looking at you, Kev.

  • She's looking at you, Kev.

  • -All right, we ready?

  • -Don't look at me. No, no.

  • -Ready, Kevin? [ Laughter ]

  • -Look that way. -Squire.

  • -No, look that way. [ Laughter ]

  • -What's happening, Jimmy? -Oh, here we go.

  • Here he goes.

  • [ Cheering and applause ]

  • -Oh [bleep] -Yes!

  • -Oh! -Good job.

  • -Oh! Jimmy, get it!

  • Jimmy -- Jimmy, get it!

  • -Robert Irwin, everybody!

  • -Jimmy, get it! Jimmy, get it!

  • Jimmy, get it! -"Crikey!" --

  • -Get it, Jimmy! Jimmy, get it!

  • "Crikey! It's the Irwins" premieres October 28th,

  • at 8:00 p.m., on Animal Planet.

  • We'll be right back. Stick around, everybody.

  • -Y'all got to get it, Jimmy. [ Cheers and applause ]

-What animals did you bring for us tonight?

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A2 初級 美國腔

凱文-哈特很害怕羅伯特-歐文的動物們 (Kevin Hart Is Terrified of Robert Irwin's Animals)

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    Emily 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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