字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 * Sirens * Ian:SHUT UP! * Evil laugh * Look at this little crime committing dirtbag burglar He just broke in your house And now he's gonna burgle the heck out of it * disappears * * Evil laughing* * Anthony screaming * *AUGH!* And now you're dead All because you are dumb dumb But don't worry, there's a solution My name is Sargent Anous And i'm gonna teach you how to survive a home burglary * Shiny tooth * Let's go! There are 2 foolproof ways to avoid being bat murdered by a burglar Burglars always hate being killed Here´s a weapon you can make using items found in any household! Simply take some pvc pipe Errrgggghhhh A nitous oxide canister Errrgggghhhh A valve from massive steam-operated machinery Errrgggghhhh Duct tape! Errrgggghhhh And a butternut squash Then you tape it all together And bam!!! You're ready for action bucko! Errrgggghhhh *Ugh!* *Screams* BUTTERNUT SQUASH'D! If it doesn't work out you can always use my next method Tire them out! However this doesn't work if you´re lazy or morbidly obese quadriplegic BAT MURDERED'D! Well lets say none of these options work In that case you need to stop that burgling burglar from getting in your house and burgling it in the first place And in this case we use the rule of Always Silently Shut Doors In case of Kleptomaniacs Or Assdick for short You'd be surprised how many people don't think about assdick I think about assdick all the time *disappears* Now there´s a man knows his assdick ASSDICK FAIL'D! Lets try that again Girls Scout Cookies Do you have the new punch flavor? yep ASSDICK FIST'D! Let's try that again Try to get through that, BIT*H! 00:02:56,460 --> 00:02:57,900 ASSDICK TO THE FACE'D! If Assdick doesn't work for you, you only have one option left Dress as a burglar yourself! not bad What the hell? Uhh... sorry sir i am currently burglaring this house right now No my apologies I shall burglar elsewhere Good day, sir! YUSS!!! BURGLAR BAMOOZLE'D-D-DD-D! Stop right there you burgling burglars! No no i'm just pretending to be a burglar Like you told me to No i am just dressing like a burglar like you told me to Prove it! Take off your masks! See I can't tell you two apart. All you white people look the same. What? We don't look nothing alike! Bullsh*t! Hah! That burgling scum is off the streets for good! But just to make sure Let's go celebrate with some Ice cream I'll buy since I keep all my life savings Right in this wallet! Ag! Ow! OO! Ow! Aug! AAAAAAAAHHHH!!! Five Dollars? He was RICH!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAH! *Coughing* Well, join me next week when I show you how to Get the most likes on Instagram By posting a picture of yourself dying From BAT murder....... *Click!* Yeah! That one's going to get on the popular page for sure! #CRAYOLO! Bleugh! Sergeant Anous only got 2 likes on his picture, Both were from his mom HASHTAG CRAYOLO! To see bloopers and, this.... AAH! Click the video right here! Sorry, what was that? I have short term memory loss From when I was eating paint STOP RIGHT THERE!!!!! AND Subscribe! WHAT's THAT? YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SUBSCRIBE??????!!!!!????!!!! BULLSH*T!!! Yeah, I don't get why people find it so weird When a guy loves his stuffed animal But I LIKE to get naked and laven yourself in baby oil! Then take my teddy bear and hump it into submission until I fall asleep WHO Cares? right? RIGHT? RRRIIIIIIIIIIGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHTTTTTTT UGH! OWWW!
B2 中高級 美國腔 如何在入室盜竊中倖存下來? (HOW TO SURVIVE A BURGLARY) 14 0 賴正華 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日 更多分享 分享 收藏 回報 影片單字