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  • >>OKAY, GUYS.

  • HERE'S YOUR BILL AND

  • YOUR FORTUNE COOKIES.

  • >>THANK YOU.

  • >>GUYS, THANK YOU

  • SO MUCH FOR DINNER.

  • >>YEAH, YOU'RE WELCOME, MAN.

  • HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

  • "YOU WILL COMMIT A CRIME

  • IN THREE MINUTES."

  • HUH.

  • >>THAT'S PRETTY DIRECT.

  • >>RIGHT?

  • >>YEAH, MINE ARE

  • NEVER THAT SPECIFIC.

  • >>WHAT DOES YOURS SAY?

  • >>UH, MINE SAYS,

  • "YOU WILL WITNESS A

  • CRIME IN THREE MINUTES."

  • >>JEREMY, WHAT DOES YOURS...

  • >>"YOU WILL DIE

  • IN THREE MINUTES."

  • >>MATT, I THINK YOU'RE

  • GOING TO KILL JEREMY.

  • >>NO, I'M NOT.

  • WHY WOULD I DO THAT?

  • >>I DON'T KNOW.

  • JEALOUSY.

  • >>WHAT?

  • JEREMY, I'M NOT JEALOUS OF YOU.

  • >>I GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.

  • >>ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

  • THIS IS JUST A

  • WEIRD COINCIDENCE.

  • LOOK, WE'LL GET NEW

  • FORTUNES AND IT'LL BE FINE.

  • SORRY, I NEED TO USE

  • THESE FOR SCIENCE.

  • "YOU WILL SOON ACQUIRE

  • FIFTY DOLLARS."

  • SEE?

  • >>THAT'S THE EXACT AMOUNT OF

  • MONEY I HAVE IN MY WALLET.

  • >>JEREMY, I-

  • >>YOU'RE GOING TO

  • KILL ME AND ROB ME?

  • >>MATT!

  • >>NO, I WOULDN'T KILL

  • YOU FOR FIFTY DOLLARS!

  • >>OH, SO YOU WOULD KILL HIM

  • FOR MORE THAN FIFTY DOLLARS!

  • >>NO, I'M NOT KILLING ANYONE,

  • LEAST OF ALL MY FRIENDS.

  • >>I HAVE A CHILD, MATT.

  • WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN

  • TO HIM WHEN HIS FATHER

  • IS MURDERED AND ROBBED?

  • IF I WERE A BILLIONAIRE,

  • HE'D BECOME BATMAN.

  • BUT I'M NOT A BILLIONAIRE.

  • I'M MIDDLE-CLASS!

  • MIDDLE-CLASS, MATT!

  • MY SON WILL NEVER BE BATMAN!

  • >>JEREMY, YOUR SON

  • WILL NOT BE ORPHANED.

  • >>OH, TELL THAT

  • TO MY NEW FORTUNE.

  • "YOUR SON WILL BE AN ORPHAN,

  • AND THEN GROW UP TO BE ROBIN"!

  • ROBIN, MATT?

  • YOU'VE CURSED MY SON TO WEAR

  • TIGHTS THE REST OF HIS DAYS.

  • >>JEREMY, I'M NOT

  • GOING TO KILL YOU.

  • STACEY, BACK ME UP.

  • >>UH, MY NEW FORTUNE SAYS,

  • "YOU WILL FIND TRUE LOVE."

  • >>SEE?

  • WE KNOW THAT'S NOT HAPPENING.

  • >>HEY.

  • >>I JUST CALL IT LIKE I SEE IT.

  • >>WAIT.

  • JEREMY, IT'S ALMOST TIME.

  • YOU NEED TO LEAVE.

  • >>WHAT?

  • WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT?

  • >>I STARTED IT THE SECOND

  • YOU READ YOUR FORTUNE.

  • >>THIS IS WHY YOU'RE SINGLE.

  • >>WHAT?

  • >>JUST TAKE MY WALLET.

  • JUST PLEASE DON'T KILL ME, OKAY.

  • >>JEREMY, I'M NOT GOING TO KILL-

  • [STOPWATCH BEEPS]

  • SEE?

  • NO CRIME COMMITTED.

  • >>UM, EXCUSE ME, SIR.

  • YOU'RE PARKED IN FRONT

  • OF A FIRE HYDRANT,

  • AND AROUND HERE THAT'S A CRIME.

  • >>OH, NO.

  • >>OH...

  • [CHUCKLES]

  • >>OH, SORRY.

  • HI.

  • >>HI.

  • >>NICE STOPWATCH.

  • >>OH...

  • >>NO, NO, JEREMY, NO!

  • BREATHE!

  • BREATHE!

  • HE'S OKAY.

  • THE FORTUNE WAS WRONG.

  • [MUFFLED GUNSHOT]

  • >>I WILL LOOK AFTER YOUR SON.

  • >>IF YOU SUBSCRIBE,

  • YOU WILL RECEIVE GREAT FORTUNE.

  • >>IF YOU COMMENT BELOW,

  • YOU WILL ALSO RECEIVE

  • GREAT FORTUNE.

  • >>"SOMETIMES IT'S

  • BETTER TO BE ALONE."

  • WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

  • >>WHAT YOU THINK IT MEANS.

  • >>I WANT A NEW FORTUNE.

  • "RACHEL"!

  • THAT'S NOT EVEN A FORTUNE.

  • >>IT'S WEIRD THAT IT SAID THAT.

>>OKAY, GUYS.

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B1 中級 美國腔

財富餅乾的力量 (The Power of Fortune Cookies)

  • 111 3
    s95 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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