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  • Welcome. Welcome back to the show.

    歡迎再次來上今夜秀

  • We have an all-military audience

    看看觀眾席滿滿的軍人

  • - the best audience all year. - I know.

    - 他們是最棒的觀眾! - 沒錯!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • My dad, my dad was in the U.S. Navy.

    我爸曾在美國海軍服役

  • - So, you know... - Is that right? Hey.

    - 所以囉 - 真假?

  • [ Cheers and applause ] Me too.

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲) 我爸也是耶

  • I have a long history with seaman, so... yeah.

    我對海軍/精子知道可多的 (seaman 和 semen 發音一樣) ,所以. . .是的

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • -Yeah. -Yeah, that's...

    - 是的 - 那倒是

  • - Me too. - I don't want to know about...

    - 我也很了解他 (它) 們 - 我可不想知道. . .

  • Well, I can clearly see you have something in your hair.

    你頭髮很有型喔

  • [ Audience "Oohs" ]

    (觀眾:哇!)

  • No, I meant my dad was in the Navy.

    我是說我爸也在海軍

  • That's very bad

    真是令人懷念

  • That's what I meant to say, he was...

    我原本的意思是這樣,他. . .

  • It's always great to see you. You look fantastic.

    見到妳真開心,妳看起來美極了!

  • -Oh, so do you. -Thank you. I appreciate that.

    - 你也挺不賴的! - 謝謝

  • What about me is so fantastic? No, I'm just kidding.

    我哪裡還不賴?別認真,問好玩的

  • -Your hair. -Thank you very much.

    - 你的頭髮 - 謝謝

  • I want to talk to you about...

    我想說的是. . .

  • It's burger season now. And you...

    現在是漢堡季,而妳. . .

  • -It's always burger season. -It is.

    - 一直都是漢堡季 - 對啦

  • No, but you... [ Cheers and applause ]

    但妳. . . (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • - Isn't it? - I'm ready to put it

    - 是不是? - 我準備好

  • into full gear. You want me to taste

    接受挑戰,妳要我吃吃看

  • a taste test of which burger, right, is that what's going on?

    吃出是哪種口味的漢堡,對吧?接下來要做的

  • Well, I have... I'm always disappointed.

    其實,我非常失望

  • Sorry, guys and girls and ladies and transgender people

    很抱歉,在座的先生、小姐跟跨性別朋友

  • in the audience tonight.

    今晚在觀眾席的各位

  • But I... I'm always disappointed by the American burger

    我實在不是美式漢堡的粉絲

  • because you go in and there's no beets,

    它裡頭沒有甜菜

  • there's no caramelized onion, and there's no egg.

    也沒有焦糖洋蔥,更沒有蛋

  • -What? -So, I have got

    - 什麼?- 所以我為你帶來了

  • an Australian burger organized for you.

    澳洲漢堡

  • But I also have a vegetarian burger.

    我還帶來了一個蔬食漢堡

  • Ooh, wow, wow, wow. [ Cheers ]

    哇,真令人期待 (歡呼聲)

  • Which, I swear to God, is the best goddamn burger...

    我發誓,它真的是超級好吃

  • Superiority Burgeryou will ever have in your life.

    「超級漢堡」— 絕對是你這輩子吃過最棒的

  • All right. So how do you want to do this?

    好,那妳要怎樣進行?

  • Well, I want to blindfold you, for many reasons.

    我要蒙住你,原因可多呢

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • [ Cheers and applause ] This is gonna be fun!

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲) 超好玩的啦!

  • -Okay. -Okay.

    - 好吧 - 來吧!

  • - All right, here we go. -That's not a blindfold.

    - 開始吧 - 那不是眼罩

  • That's something you get in first class on American Airlines.

    你坐美國航空的頭等艙就拿得到了

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • I wouldn't know. I only fly coach.

    我只搭經濟艙,沒看過這個東西

  • [ Light laughter ]

    (輕聲笑)

  • -Is that good? -That's -- I don't know.

    - 我看起來怎樣?棒嗎?- 嗯,怎麼說

  • -Does it look not good? -You feeling comfortable?

    - 看起來不好嗎?- 您感覺舒服嗎?

  • -Feels like 50 shades of... -50 shades of burger.

    - 好像什麼的五十道陰影. . . - 漢堡的五十道陰影!

  • -Yeah, burger. 50 shades of burger.

    - 沒錯,漢堡的五十道陰影!

  • Are you ready for your burger? Bring on the burgers, boys.

    準備好試吃漢堡了嗎?上菜吧小子

  • -All right, here they are. -Okay.

    - 來了 - 好

  • All right.

  • We're gonna go with the traditional first

    先吃傳統道地的澳洲漢堡

  • because I know you're a traditional kind of guy.

    因為你滿傳統的

  • Why am I blindfolded? I know what a burger looks like.

    我為什麼要被蒙住?我很清楚漢堡長什麼樣子啊

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • It's like... so weird.

    這 . . . 超怪的

  • -Cause it's sexy. -Yeah, okay. Got it.

    - 這樣很性感 - 好,了解,多謝

  • So, this is the traditional Australian burger.

    來,這是傳統澳洲漢堡

  • It's got egg. It's got caramelized onions.

    有蛋、焦糖洋蔥

  • It's got lettuce. I should work at McDonald's.

    還有生菜,我該在麥當勞工作的

  • All right. An Australian burger.

    嗯嗯,道地澳洲漢堡

  • -It's only got one bun. -Okay.

    - 它只有一片小圓麵包 - 好

  • Now what do I -- Now do I eat it?

    那我要 . . . 現在吃它嗎?

  • That gets the egg going. [ Audience groans ]

    蛋打下去蛋汁流出才對(觀眾驚訝嘆息聲)

  • I know. -Wait. What are they making

    - 很訝異吧 - 等等,他們幹嘛

  • these noises for?

    發出這聲音?

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • I don't know what is gonna go down, man.

    我真不知道接下來會怎樣

  • -I trust you. -Oh, my God, it is so big.

    - 我相信妳 - 老天,它好大!

  • -I just... -Thank you.

    - 我 . . . - 真開心妳愛

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • Oh, my God, this is gonna be so much fun, Jimmy.

    - 天啊,吉米,這超好玩的!

  • -I can't wait for you to eat it! -All right, here we go.

    - 等不及看你吃了!- 來吧!

  • Right. [ Cheers ]

    好的(歡呼聲)

  • - Now what do I do? - You open your mouth.

    - 現在我要幹嘛?- 嘴巴張開啊

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • Said the actress to the bishop.

    很挑逗吧!(有些性暗示的意味)

  • -[ Laughs ] -Okay, okay, over here.

    (笑聲) 來,漢堡在這邊

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (鼓譟聲與拍手聲)

  • Do we have a napkin?

    有紙巾嗎?

  • That is fantastic.

    超好吃的

  • -That is not the vegetarian. - Nope.

    剛那個不是蔬食漢堡

  • - Okay. So what did you get?

    答對了,那你剛吃到什麼?

  • Did you get the caramelized onions?

    有吃到焦糖洋蔥嗎?

  • There's a beet in there. It actually tasted real good.

    裡頭有甜菜,吃起來超美味的

  • So, you forget beets in America, really important.

    你看,美國漢堡就沒加甜菜,這可是美味關鍵!

  • -I never had that. -What else did you get?

    - 我從未吃過這樣的漢堡 - 你還吃到那些食材?

  • -I got egg in there. Caramelized onions, right?

    蛋、還有焦糖洋蔥,對吧?

  • Did you get, you know, GM-beef or did you get... oh, hang on.

    有吃到基因改良的牛肉嗎?等等喔

  • What does GM beef mean?

    GM 牛肉是什麼?

  • Oh [bleep] I'm so sorry.

    啊(消音),真抱歉

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • What is going on?

    發生什麼事?

  • You are gonna go home to your wife and she is going say,

    你回到家老婆會問

  • "What is that on your pants?"

    你褲子上沾到什麼東西?

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • -That's happened before. -I am so sorry.

    - 沒關係啦,之前也發生過 - 真的很抱歉

  • I am so sorry.

    我真的很抱歉

  • Okay, so... -Did something just drip on me?

    嗯,有東西滴到我身上嗎?

  • You need to cleanse it with a beer.

    來杯啤酒清除味道吧

  • -Okay. -Okay?

    - 好 - 好嗎?

  • Sure. [ Cheers and applause ]

    當然好(歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • Right?

    我說的對吧?

  • You are the best guest ever, by the way.

    妳是有史以來最好的來賓

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • Okay, here's a straw. Don't wanna ruin your lipstick.

    來吸管在這兒,口紅別掉囉

  • [ Cheers ]

    (鼓譟聲)

  • Got a little egg. Okay, okay, now does this

    嘴角有點蛋,好了擦掉了,現在

  • - cleanse your palate? - Yeah, that was great.

    - 味覺清爽了嗎? - 有,那啤酒很讚

  • - Now, this... - That's delicious beer.

    - 現在要獻上的是 . . . - 啤酒好喝

  • ...ladies and gentlemen and transgender members of the military,

    在座的軍人先生、女士以及跨性別的朋友

  • this is the Superiority Burger.

    這就是「超級漢堡」

  • - Okay. - Called the Superiority Burger

    - 好喔 - 之所以叫「超級漢堡」

  • because it is superior.

    就是其他漢堡沒得比

  • Brooks Headley, down in the Lower East Side.

    紐約下東城名廚,布魯克斯 · 黑德利創造的美食

  • - Okay. - This is a burger.

    - 了解 - 真的是漢堡喔

  • [ Cheering ]

    (拍手鼓譟聲)

  • - I know. Confusing, huh?

    疑惑對吧,我完全可以了解

  • - Yeah. [ Laughter ]

    - 沒錯(大笑聲)

  • That's fantastic.

    味道棒呆了

  • -This is the thinking man's burger.

    絕對是男人眼中的真漢堡

  • - Wait. Does it have mustard on it, too?

    這上面也加了芥末嗎?

  • - There's mustard. - Pickles?

    - 對有芥末 - 酸黃瓜?

  • - There's pickles. - That's fantastic.

    - 對有酸黃瓜 - 真的太好吃了

  • - I'm in. - And there is no meat

    - 我愛上它了 - 驚訝的是它裡頭

  • in this burger. - No meat in that one?

    沒加肉 - 就是那個沒有肉的蔬食漢堡嗎?

  • - What did you do to me? - Oh, you know.

    - 妳又掉東西在我褲子上了嗎? - 啊,就別說了

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • - This is messy. - They were both delicious.

    - 搞得滿手都是 - 兩種漢堡都好吃

  • I really like the Superiority Burger.

    我真的喜愛「超級漢堡」

  • - This is no meat. Isn't that crazy?

    這真是太瘋狂了,裡頭居然沒肉

  • -That's fantastic. -Brooks Headley developed this.

    - 味道棒透了! - 布魯克斯 · 黑德利發明的

  • Who out there would like to have a hamburger fed to them

    誰想嚐一嚐?

  • by Academy Award-winning actress Cate Blanchett?

    奧斯卡影后凱特 · 布蘭琪親餵的漢堡?

  • Let's break it up, please. They would love some, please.

    把漢堡切成小塊給觀眾嚐嚐,他們會想來一口的

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • ♪♪

    上菜音樂

  • -I want the Navy! -All right, you want Navy.

    - 我要海軍! - 好,就海軍

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • You're doing it.

    妳來上菜漢堡

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • Okay. Do you want the meat or do you want the no-meat?

    你想要有肉的,還是無肉的「超級漢堡」?

  • [ Audience shouting "Meat" ]

    (觀眾大喊:「有肉的」)

  • Is this what it's like to be on a boat as a woman?

    女人在船上都是這樣嗎?

  • [ Cheers and applause ] It is, it is.

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲) 對啊,對啊

  • -Hold that, guys. -All right, here we go.

    - 男士們先等等 - 來上菜吧

  • You can get your turn.

    等下就輪到你們了

  • But don't get it on the whites, here.

    但別弄髒白色的制服喔

  • You got to be very -- -Oh, [ bleep ]

    你一定要很 . . . (消音)

  • Oh [bleep] -I'm so sorry. - It's all right. You do this. I'll do this.

    (消音) - 我真抱歉 - 沒事啦,你來餵,我讓食物不掉到制服上

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • Go for it. You wanna be blindfolded, too?

    來吃吧,你也想被蒙住嗎?

  • -No, you want Superiority. -Okay.

    - 妳想要「超級漢堡」- 好喔

  • -Generally, as a woman, we have superiority.

    姊妹們,我們有的是超級優勢!

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • Okay, go for it.

    來,大口吃吧!

  • Yes!

    這就對了!

  • What did you think? That's fantastic right there.

    味道如何?就說超好吃的啦

  • And then, you want to try the other one?

    妳想吃吃看另一種漢堡嗎?

  • -Oh, hang on. -Oh, yeah. Okay.

    - 等等,換那位 - 好啊,來

  • Okay, right... -We're going to go --

    - 這邊 - 獻上 . . .

  • This is the Aussie burger. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.

    澳洲漢堡,真抱歉這看起來

  • This is the sloppy Joe.

    像邋遢喬三明治

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • How was that? That's good, right?

    怎樣,不錯吃吧?

  • -Here, pass it around. -Pass it around.

    - 遞過去給大家嚐嚐 - 拿過去

  • Fantastic, right? You're gonna wipe it on my suit.

    很好玩,對吧?看妳要把手往我的西裝上擦

  • Wiping it on my suit.

    往我的西裝上擦

  • You are the best guest ever.

    妳是最讚的來賓

  • You're the first person to ever bring...

    第一個來上節目帶 (美食) 的人

  • No, my dad was in the Navy, right?

    我爸在海軍待過,對吧?

  • -He was... -Look at them!

    - 他 . . . - 看看那兩個活寶!

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • - You have a beer, too. -I know, I do have a beer.

    - 妳也有杯啤酒 - 對啊

  • - Okay. - Wanna have a chugging contest?

    - 好 - 要來個競酒比賽嗎?

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • ♪♪

    鼓動音樂

  • [ Audience chanting "Chug" ]

    (觀眾反覆大喊:「比!比!比!」)

  • Are you doing it?

    妳要比嗎?

  • [ Audience chanting "Chug" ]

    (觀眾反覆大喊:「比!」)

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • [ Audience booing ]

    (觀眾噓聲)

  • You... Oh, for God's sake, shut up.

    - 你 . . . 拜託!可不可以閉嘴!

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • You are gonna chug like a woman.

    我保證你競酒跟女生一樣

  • [ Audience shouts ]

    (觀眾大叫)

  • -What? -With a straw.

    - 什麼? - 用吸管競酒

  • We wear lipstick. We're not gonna get it all over

    我們有擦口紅,才不會讓口紅印弄得杯子都是

  • the glass. Okay, hang on.

    好的,等等

  • [ Audience shouting ]

    (觀眾大喊)

  • -Don't yell. -Hang on, no, hang on.

    - 別大吼 - 等一下

  • No, you got more than me. Okay.

    你的是比較大杯的才對

  • 1, 2, 3.

    一、二、三

  • [ Drum roll ]

    (鼓聲咚咚響)

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

    (歡呼聲與拍手聲)

  • ♪♪

    勝利音樂

  • Oh, my God.

    我的天啊

  • - Dude, you're good! - Oh.

    - 妳超會喝!- 噢

  • Oh, my gosh.

    我的老天

  • - Are you okay? -Ugh!

    - 你還好嗎? - 噢

  • [ Coughs ]

    (咳嗽聲)

  • -I hate beer. -Oh, my God.

    -我討厭死啤酒了 - 天啊

  • You are a champ.

    你真的是最棒的

  • -No, I'm just competitive. -Oh, my gosh.

    - 才不,我只是好勝心強 - 我的天啊

  • -That is fantastic. -That is disgusting.

    -剛剛超好玩的 - 才怪,我快噁心死了

  • That really is unbelievable. Man, you're unbelievable.

    剛剛真是驚人,妳真是太厲害了

  • What kind of beer was that?

    那是哪種啤酒啊?

  • Must be some Australian thing, right?

    一定是澳洲啤酒,不是嗎?

  • Was it? No.

    是嗎?不對

  • An Australian-themed beer. [ Indistinct shouting ]

    澳洲主題的啤酒 (遠處傳來觀眾的聲音)

  • -Yeah. -Victoria? No.

    - 維多利亞 (澳洲啤酒)?不是

  • Are there Australian servicemen, women,

    這邊有來自澳洲的軍人先生、女士

  • and transgender people out there?

    和跨性別朋友嗎?

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • Hi, y'all, y'all.

    嗨嗨,大夥好

  • Oh, there's a piece of egg down here, as well.

    這邊也掉了一小塊蛋

  • -I don't... Yeah, I don't want to know about it.

    我不想知道

  • -You are a legend. -Can I lie down?

    - 妳是傳奇 - 我可以躺下嗎?

  • -Let's talk about "Ocean's 8." It's you, it's this giant cast.

    來談談「瞞天過海:八面玲瓏」吧,有一票像妳這種超大卡司的演員

  • There's a heist.

    集體搶劫的情節

  • There's jewelry involved, the Met Gala.

    跟珠寶、大都會博物館晚宴有關

  • [ Slurring ] I don't understand a word you're saying.

    (含糊地說) 不懂你在講什麼,一個字都聽不懂

  • Well... [ Laughter ]

    哎呀 (大笑聲)

  • There's jewelry, and there's a movie,

    對,有閃亮亮的珠寶,有部電影. . .

  • and they steal stuff, and it's really, I love you.

    她們偷東西,真的是 . . . 愛你啦

  • [ Laughter ]

    (大笑聲)

  • [ Mock crying ] I'm just tired.

    (假哭) 我只是累了

  • I'm having a moment right now! -I know, I love you!

    - 內心很多感觸 - 對對,愛你喔!

Welcome. Welcome back to the show.

歡迎再次來上今夜秀

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