we usually remember the names of our doctors,

身為病人，

but often we forget the names of our nurses.

通常大家只會記住醫生的名字，

I remember one.

而常常忘記護士的名字。

I had breast cancer a few years ago,

我就記住了一位。

and somehow I managed to get through the surgeries

幾年前我罹患了乳癌，

and the beginning of the treatment just fine.

我總算把手術熬過去，

I could hide what was going on.

而且治療在開始時還算順利。

Everybody didn't really have to know.

我其實可以隱瞞當中發生的事，

I could walk my daughter to school,

沒有必要讓任何人知道。

I could go out to dinner with my husband;

我可以走路陪女兒上學，

I could fool people.

我可以陪丈夫去外面吃晚餐；

But then my chemo was scheduled to begin

我可以欺騙大家。

and that terrified me

可是我的化療在預定時間開始時，

because I knew that I was going to lose every single hair on my body

真的讓我嚇到了，

because of the kind of chemo that I was going to have.

因為我知道 我將會失去身上所有的毛髮，

I wasn't going to be able to pretend anymore

這是由於我接受的化療種類造成的。

as though everything was normal.

我沒辦法繼續裝作一切如常。

I was scared.

我當時很害怕。

I knew what it felt like to have everybody treating me with kid gloves,

我懂得那種被所有人 小心翼翼對待的感覺，

and I just wanted to feel normal.

而我只希望跟平常一樣。

I had a port installed in my chest.

當時我胸口放了一條人工血管。

I went to my first day of chemotherapy,

第一天去做化療的時候，

and I was an emotional wreck.

我的情緒崩潰了。

My nurse, Joanne, walked in the door,

我的護士喬安妮走進房間，

and every bone in my body was telling me to get up out of that chair

我骨子裡只想站起來離開座椅，

and take for the hills.

然後逃到山上去。

But Joanne looked at me and talked to me like we were old friends.

但是喬安妮看著我， 把我當成老朋友一樣跟我說話。

And then she asked me,

然後她問我：

"Where'd you get your highlights done?"

你是在哪裡給頭髮挑染？

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

And I was like, are you kidding me?

我的反應就像說；你在開玩笑嗎？

You're going to talk to me about my hair when I'm on the verge of losing it?

在我就要喪失頭髮的時候， 你還要談我頭髮的事？

I was kind of angry,

當時我有點不高興，

and I said, "Really? Hair?"

我回答她說：「沒搞錯吧？頭髮？」

And with a shrug of her shoulders she said,

她聳聳肩膀說：

"It's gonna grow back."

「還是會再長回來的。」

And in that moment she said the one thing I had overlooked,

在那一瞬間，她說出了 我之前忽略掉的事，

and that was that at some point, my life would get back to normal.

那就是我的人生 在某一刻會恢復正常。

She really believed that.

她真的相信這樣。

And so I believed it, too.

於是我也跟著相信了。

Now, worrying about losing your hair when you're fighting cancer

在與癌症奮戰時卻擔心失去頭髮， 最初看起來好像很愚蠢，

may seem silly at first,

但其實這不只關乎擔心外表如何。

but it's not just that you're worried about how you're going to look.

這關乎擔心每個人都會 很細心地照顧你。

It's that you're worried that everybody's going to treat you so carefully.

喬安妮使我在六個月以來 首次感到正常。

Joanne made me feel normal for the first time in six months.

我們聊她的男朋友，

We talked about her boyfriends,

討論有關在紐約市尋找公寓的事，

we talked about looking for apartments in New York City,

我們也聊到我對化療的反應，

and we talked about my reaction to the chemotherapy --

甚麼話題都一併去聊。

all kind of mixed in together.

我總是想知道，

And I always wondered,

她怎麼本能地知道怎樣跟我交談？

how did she so instinctively know just how to talk to me?

喬安妮．斯塔哈和我對她的景仰，

Joanne Staha and my admiration for her

使我展開進入護士世界的探索之旅。

marked the beginning of my journey into the world of nurses.

幾年後，我被要求進行一個計劃，

A few years later, I was asked to do a project

主題是讚揚護士的工作。

that would celebrate the work that nurses do.

我就先從喬安妮着手，

I started with Joanne,

然後我遊走全國 跟 100 多位護士見面。

and I met over 100 nurses across the country.

我利用五年的時間， 對護士進行面談，拍照和攝影，

I spent five years interviewing, photographing and filming nurses

用來寫書並製作紀錄片。

for a book and a documentary film.

我和我的團隊一起 安排橫跨美國的路程，

With my team,

去一些正在面臨 龐大公共衞生問題的地方：

we mapped a trip across America that would take us to places

人口老化、戰爭、貧窮、牢獄。

dealing with some of the biggest public health issues facing our nation --

然後我們訪問最多病人集中、 處理這些問題的地方。

aging, war, poverty, prisons.

然後我們請求醫院和相關單位 提名最能代表他們的護士。

And then we went places

其中一位我見過面的護士 名叫布莉姬．坎培拉。

where we would find the largest concentration of patients

布莉姬出生在喀麥隆，

dealing with those issues.

是四個小孩中的老大。

Then we asked hospitals and facilities to nominate nurses

她的父親在工作期間從四樓掉下來，

who would best represent them.

背部傷勢嚴重。

One of the first nurses I met was Bridget Kumbella.

他提到很多關於臥床、 沒有受到必要護理照顧的那種感覺，

Bridget was born in Cameroon,

這驅使布莉姬投身護士專業。

the oldest of four children.

現時她在布朗克斯區當護士，

Her father was at work when he had fallen from the fourth floor

必須照顧很多不同種類的病人，

and really hurt his back.

他們來自各行各業，

And he talked a lot about what it was like to be flat on your back

也各有不同宗教信仰。

and not get the kind of care that you need.

她全程投入在事業中 以了解文化差異對健康的影響。

And that propelled Bridget to go into the profession of nursing.

她談到一個病人，

Now, as a nurse in the Bronx,

她的一位美洲原住民病人，

she has a really diverse group of patients that she cares for,

那位病人 想將大量羽毛帶入加護病房。

from all walks of life,

他這樣做才找到精神上的慰藉。

and from all different religions.

她談到曾為他請願，

And she's devoted her career to understanding the impact

表示病人各有不同宗教信仰，

of our cultural differences when it comes to our health.

使用各式各樣的物件來獲得慰藉；

She spoke of a patient --

無論是天主教的玫瑰念珠， 或是具有象徵意義的羽毛。

a Native American patient that she had --

都需要得到支持。

that wanted to bring a bunch of feathers into the ICU.

這一位是傑森．秀特。

That's how he found spiritual comfort.

傑森在阿巴拉契亞山一帶 擔任家庭保健護士，

And she spoke of advocating for him

他年幼時父親經營加油站和修理廠。

and said that patients come from all different religions

所以他在社區當護士前 是從事汽車修理。

and use all different kinds of objects for comfort;

當他在讀大學的時候，

whether it's a holy rosary or a symbolic feather,

當護士簡直一點男子氣概也沒有，

it all needs to be supported.

所以他抗拒當護士好幾年。

This is Jason Short.

他開了一段時間的卡車，

Jason is a home health nurse in the Appalachian mountains,

但是他的人生路途 總是把他拉回到護士行業。

and his dad had a gas station and a repair shop when he was growing up.

作為阿巴拉契亞山地區的 家庭保健護士，

So he worked on cars in the community that he now serves as a nurse.

傑森所到之處 甚至救護車都無法去到。

When he was in college,

在這張照片中， 他站的地方原本是一條馬路。

it was just not macho at all to become a nurse,

因為山頂挖礦， 所以馬路被土石流埋沒了，

so he avoided it for years.

傑森的病人患有肺塵病， 而現在傑森往病人房子的唯一方式，

He drove trucks for a little while,

就是開着他的越野休旅車 逆著溪流而上。

but his life path was always pulling him back to nursing.

那天我跟他一起， 車子的前擋泥板被掀走。

As a nurse in the Appalachian mountains,

第二天早上他起來後，把車頂高，

Jason goes places that an ambulance can't even get to.

把前擋泥板裝回去，

In this photograph, he's standing in what used to be a road.

然後出發去看下一位病人。

Top of the mountain mining flooded that road,

我見證了傑森充滿憐憫地 照顧這位男士，

and now the only way for Jason to get to the patient

護士工作的無微不至 再次令我印象深刻。

living in that house with black lung disease

跟布萊恩．馬克米里安見面時， 他簡直棒極了。

is to drive his SUV against the current up that creek.

他剛完成戰地派駐工作回來，

The day I was with him, we ripped the front fender off the car.

在聖地牙哥的生活還未安頓下來。

The next morning he got up, put the car on the lift,

他談到在德國擔任護士的經驗，

fixed the fender,

也談到照顧從戰場回來的士兵。

and then headed out to meet his next patient.

他們在醫院睜開眼睛後 看到的第一個人往往就是他。

I witnessed Jason caring for this gentleman

他們躺在病床上肢體不全時望着他，

with such enormous compassion,

然後開口問的第一件事就是：

and I was struck again by how intimate the work of nursing really is.

「我甚麼時候可以回去？ 我的弟兄還留在那裡。」

When I met Brian McMillion, he was raw.

然後布萊恩會這麼說：

He had just come back from a deployment

「弟兄，你哪裡都不用去。 你已經付出得夠了。」

and he hadn't really settled back in to life in San Diego yet.

布萊恩身兼護士和親歷戰事的士兵。

He talked about his experience of being a nurse in Germany

因此他的身分獨特，這讓他可以 在照料退伍軍人時明白並治癒他們。

and taking care of the soldiers coming right off the battlefield.

這一位是史蒂芬修女，

Very often, he would be the first person they would see

她在威斯康辛州經營一家 名為「洛雷托別墅」的護理之家。

when they opened their eyes in the hospital.

整個生老病死 都可在她的屋簷下看到。

And they would look at him as they were lying there,

她年少時一直希望他們住在農場裡，

missing limbs,

於是一有收養當地農場動物的機會，

and the first thing they would say is,

她就熱切地把牠們帶進安養院。

"When can I go back? I left my brothers out there."

春天時那些動物就會生出崽子。

And Brian would have to say,

史蒂芬修女就會利用那些 小鴨、小山羊和小羔羊，

"You're not going anywhere.

為洛雷托別墅的住客進行動物療法；

You've already given enough, brother."

那些住客有時連自己名字也記不起，

Brian is both a nurse and a soldier who's seen combat.

但他們抱著小山羊時確實充滿喜悅。

So that puts him in a unique position

那一天我和史蒂芬修女一起時，

to be able to relate to and help heal the veterans in his care.

我要把她帶離別墅 去拍攝她的故事的其中一段。

This is Sister Stephen,

在我們離開之前，

and she runs a nursing home in Wisconsin called Villa Loretto.

她走進一間垂死病人的房間。

And the entire circle of life can be found under her roof.

她靠過去並且說：

She grew up wishing they lived on a farm,

「我今天必須離開一下，

so given the opportunity to adopt local farm animals,

但是假如耶穌召喚你，

she enthusiastically brings them in.

你就去吧。

And in the springtime, those animals have babies.

你直接回到耶穌那裡去吧。」

And Sister Stephen uses those baby ducks, goats and lambs

我站在那邊思考，

as animal therapy for the residents at Villa Loretto

這是我有生以來第一次目睹，

who sometimes can't remember their own name,

原來可以透過放下， 來表達你對某人全心全意的愛。

but they do rejoice in the holding of a baby lamb.

我們不一定要緊抓著不放。

The day I was with Sister Stephen,

我在洛雷托別墅所見的往生的人

I needed to take her away from Villa Loretto

比我在任何時間和地方 看到的還要多。

to film part of her story.

談到保健，我們活在複雜的世代。

And before we left,

人們重視壽命， 卻容易忽視對生活品質的需求。

she went into the room of a dying patient.

當救命科技推陳出新時，

And she leaned over and she said,

我們就要作出非常複雜的決定。

"I have to go away for the day,

這些科技往往能拯救生命，

but if Jesus calls you,

但卻同時延長痛楚和垂死的過程。

you go.

我們應該如何處理這些難題呢？

You go straight home to Jesus."

我們必須盡其所能的去尋求協助。

I was standing there and thinking

護士和我們的關係相當獨特，

it was the first time in my life

原因在於他們守護在床邊的時間。

I witnessed that you could show someone you love them completely

在這段時間，

by letting go.

一種情感上的微妙關係油然而生。

We don't have to hold on so tightly.

在去年夏季八月九日，

I saw more life rolled up at Villa Loretto

我父親死於心臟病發。

than I have ever seen at any other time at any other place in my life.

我母親深受折磨，

We live in a complicated time when it comes to our health care.

她無法想像沒有我父親存在的日子。

It's easy to lose sight of the need for quality of life,

四天後，她跌倒了，

not just quantity of life.

臀部髖骨破裂，

As new life-saving technologies are created,

需要動手術，

we're going to have really complicated decisions to make.

發現只能靠自己為生存搏鬥。

These technologies often save lives,

我發現自己再次站在 接受護士照料的一方，

but they can also prolong pain and the dying process.

而這次是為著我的母親。

How in the world are we supposed to navigate these waters?

我和弟妹在及後三天 留在加護病房守候她。

We're going to need all the help we can get.

正當我們嘗試遵從母親的意願 去做出正確的決定時，

Nurses have a really unique relationship with us

我們才發覺 原來一直倚賴護士的指引。

because of the time spent at bedside.

他們再一次沒讓我們失望。

During that time,

他們在母親臨終前四天照料她時 表現出超卓的洞察力。

a kind of emotional intimacy develops.

他們使她舒適自在，為她減輕痛苦。

This past summer, on August 9,

他們懂得如何鼓勵我和妹妹 去替母親換上一件漂亮的睡衣；

my father died of a heart attack.

雖然這對她來說不再重要了，

My mother was devastated,

但對我們來說肯定意義重大。

and she couldn't imagine her world without him in it.

他們知道在母親呼出最後一口氣前 及時過來喚醒我們。

Four days later she fell,

他們也知道預留多少時間， 讓我留在房間裡陪著剛逝去的母親。

she broke her hip,

我無從了解他們如何懂得這些竅門，

she needed surgery

但我肯定知道 自己永遠感激她們再次給我指引。

and she found herself fighting for her own life.

非常感謝大家。

Once again I found myself

（掌聲）

on the receiving end of the care of nurses --

this time for my mom.

My brother and my sister and I stayed by her side

for the next three days in the ICU.

And as we tried to make the right decisions

and follow my mother's wishes,

we found that we were depending upon the guidance of nurses.

And once again,

they didn't let us down.

They had an amazing insight in terms of how to care for my mom

in the last four days of her life.

They brought her comfort and relief from pain.

They knew to encourage my sister and I to put a pretty nightgown on my mom,

long after it mattered to her,

but it sure meant a lot to us.

And they knew to come and wake me up just in time for my mom's last breath.

And then they knew how long to leave me in the room

with my mother after she died.

I have no idea how they know these things,

but I do know that I am eternally grateful

that they've guided me once again.

Thank you so very much.

(Applause)