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  • WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW"!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, YOU'RE IN

  • FOR A TREAT BECAUSE MY FIRST GUEST IS AN ACADEMY AWARD WINNER

  • YOU KNOW FROM THE HUNGER GAMES, "AMERICAN HUSTLE" AND "SILVER

  • LININGS PLAYBOOK."

  • SHE NOW STARS IN THE UPCOMING FILM "RED SPARROW."

  • >> I'M SKEWERROUS, ARE YOU FOLLOWING ME OR ARE YOU JUST

  • CLUMSY.

  • >> YOU THINK WE'RE SO INTERESTED IN YOU.

  • >> WHAT MADE YOU WANT TO BECOME A TRANSLATOR.

  • >> IF I WORK FOR THE GOVERNMENT, THE STATE HELPS ME TAKE CARE OF

  • MY MOTHER.

  • MY UNCLE HELPED ME GET THE JOB.

  • >> HE IS A VERY POWERFUL MAN.

  • IN MY COUNTRY, IF YOU DO NOT MATTER TO THE MAN IN POWER, YOU

  • DO NOT MATTER.

  • >> I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

  • WHY, ARE WE GOING TO BECOME FRIENDS?

  • >> Stephen: PLEASE WELCOME JENNIFER LAWRENCE!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ( BAND PLAYING )

  • >> PRETTY SUCCESSFUL!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: LOVELY TO SEE YOU

  • AGAIN.

  • THANKS FOR COMING BACK.

  • >> IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU.

  • THANKS FOR HAVING ME.

  • >> Stephen: YOU HAVE BEEN ON A LIEUTENANT OF TALK SHOWS, BUT

  • YOU'VE HAD AN EXPERIENCE SINCE THE LAST TIME WE WERE TOGETHER

  • THAT -- >> OH, GOD...

  • >> Stephen: NO, MADE YOU AN AFICIONADO OF TALK SHOWS IN THE

  • WAY SOME AREN'T BECAUSE YOU TOOK OVER FOR JIMMY KIMMEL WHEN HE

  • WAS OUT FOR THE SURGERY OF HIS SON.

  • >> OOH, GONNA MAKE MY NOSEBLEED.

  • >> Stephen: THERE YOU ARE TALKING TO KIM KARDASHIAN.

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) WHAT DID YOU MAKE OF THE

  • EXPERIENCE?

  • NOT AS EASY AS IT LOOKS, IS IT?

  • >> PRETTY EASY.

  • NOT THAT HARD.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I'M JUST KIDDING.

  • THE ONLY THING THEY KEPT TELLING ME, THERE IS A CLOCK BEHIND HER

  • HEAD.

  • IF SHE'S TALKING, TRY TO WRAP IT UP.

  • >> Stephen: A CLOCK?

  • A 5-MINUTE.

  • >> Stephen: LIKE RIGHT OVER HERE?

  • THERE'S A CLOCK -- >> YEAH, LOOK OUT THE WINDOW.

  • >> Stephen: YEAH THERE'S A CLOCK RIGHT BEHIND HER?

  • >> THERE'S A CLOCK.

  • THEY WERE, LIKE, WHEN SHE GETS TO THE END OR IT STARTS COUNTING

  • DOWN, WRAP IT UP, WE'LL GO TO COMMERCIAL.

  • WE WERE IN THE MIDDLE AND SHE WAS SHOOTING ME DOWN LIKE A

  • CONGRESSWOMAN.

  • I LOOKED AT MY LIST AND I'M OUT OF QUESTIONS, AND I HAD FIVE

  • MINUTES.

  • I'M, LIKE, DO YOU WEAR SOCKS TO SLEEP ANY DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO

  • ASK.

  • >> Stephen: WOULD YOU LIKE A DRINK?

  • >> SURE.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • I'VE NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE.

  • HOW DOES THIS OPEN?

  • >> OKAY, YOU'RE JUST MESSING WITH ME.

  • OH, MY GOD!

  • YOU REALLY DO HAVE IT!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THIS WILL WORK!

  • THIS WILL BRING MY SOUL BACK, I KNOW UT!

  • COOL!

  • >> Stephen: I KEEP ATE WILLLE SOMETHING BACK THERE IN CASE

  • SOMEONE WANTS SOMETHING.

  • >> IN CASE SOMEONE'S HAVING MENTAL BREAKDOWN, PERFECT.

  • >> Stephen: THIS IS CUBAN RUM, IN CASE YOU --

  • >> OH, IT'S RUM?

  • >> Stephen: YEAH.

  • I HAVE BOURBON.

  • >> YEAH, IT'S FINE.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • YOU KNOW WHAT?

  • IT'S ALCOHOL.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • THANK YOU SO MUCH.

  • OH...

  • ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

  • ( PIANO RIFF ) SORRY.

  • OH, LET'S SEE WHAT ELSE.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT HAVE WE GOT HERE?

  • YOU'RE TAKING A YEAR OFF?

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Stephen: WHY.

  • BECAUSE I'M SO MISERABLE.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE --

  • >> I'M STILL DEVELOPING THINGS.

  • I'M NOT GOING TO BE, LIKE, ON SET.

  • IT'S NOT GOING TO BE A DRAMATIC -- OHER GOD, HERE WE

  • GO!

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I HAVE A PREMIERE TONIGHT.

  • I GUESS I HAVE TO CANCEL IT.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I DON'T KNOW, I'LL BE DEVELOPING

  • THINGS AND TALKING TO KIDS ABOUT, YOU KNOW, CORRUPTION.

  • >> Stephen: YOU WILL BE DEVELOPING THINGS AND TALKING TO

  • KIDS ABOUT CORRUPTION?

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

  • >> I'M A PART OF AN ORGANIZATION TRYING TO PASS THE STATE BY

  • STATE LEGISLATION TO GET BIG MONEY OUT OF POLITICS

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) SO I GO TO THIS HIGH SCHOOL TO,

  • LIKE, TALK TO KIDS ABOUT, YOU KNOW, THE GOVERNMENT AND

  • SUPER PACS AND BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, AND, SO, I HAVE BEEN -- YOU

  • KNOW, WHEN TRUMP GOT ELECTED MY HEAD SPUN OFF.

  • I READ ALL THESE BOOKS AND I REALLY LEARNED MYSELF GOOD ABOUT

  • OUR GOVERNMENT AND ABOUT TWEEDEN AND NORWAY'S TRUST IN THEIR

  • GOVERNMENT VERSUS AMERICA'S.

  • EDUCATED MYSELF FULLY.

  • FLY TO OHIO, GO TO A HIGH SCHOOL.

  • FIRST QUESTION, I WAS, LIKE, UM, I DON'T KNOW.

  • THEY WERE SO SMART.

  • I WAS LIKE, WELL, I CAN'T GO TO COLLEGES ANYMORE.

  • I'M GOING TO START GETTING TODDLERS INTO POLITICS.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) START A GRASSROOTS LEVEL.

  • >> Stephen: SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD THING TO DO.

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY, SO SPEAKING OF, LIKE, POLITICS AND

  • CORRUPTION, YOU RECENTLY WERE ILL-USED IN THE DEFENSE OF

  • HARVEY WEINSTEIN.

  • >> YES!

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • I WAS.

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) HE IS JUST THAT HORRIBLE ASS

  • BOIL THAT DOES NOT GO AWAY.

  • YOU POP THE ASS BOIL, HE'S JUST THE WORST.

  • WHEN IS IT GOING TO END?

  • IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT I COME UP WITH A STATEMENT IN

  • LONDON, AND I'M, LIKE, IT'S STILL NOT OVER?

  • THE AWFULNESS IS STILL HAPPENING?

  • >> Stephen: IN HIS DEFENSE.

  • HIS DEFENSE?

  • >> Stephen: HIS LAWYERS, NOT ME.

  • >> OKAY.

  • >> Stephen: HIS LAWYERS SAID, HEY, MERYL STREEP ONCE SAID

  • SOMETHING NICE ABOUT HIM AND JENNIFER LAWRENCE SAID I WAS

  • NICE TO HER.

  • HE DRAGS YOU INTO HIS PILE OF (BLEEP).

  • >> YEAH.

  • >> Stephen: YEAH.

  • EVERYBODY DOES.

  • I'M VERY LUCKY.

  • >> Stephen: IS THIS WHY YOU'RE TAKING A YEAR OFF?

  • >> NO, IT'S BY COINCIDENCE.

  • I LOVE MY JOB AND I'M VERY HAPPY.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I LOVE ACTING.

  • PRESS TOURS GIVE YOU THIS CRESCENDO MOMENT.

  • >> Stephen: SURE.

  • IT'S LIKE IT CRESCENDOS.

  • >> Stephen: THIS IS GOOD, THOUGH, ISN'T IT?

  • >> ACTUALLY TURNS OUT I REALLY LIKE RUM.

  • YOU KNOW, I LIKE VACATION ME SO WHY WOULDN'T I LIKE RUM?

  • >> Stephen: I WANT TO GO ON VACATION WITH YOU!

  • >> MY VACATION ME'S NAME IS GAYLE.

  • I WISH TO GOD I HAD A PHOTO OF HER.

  • >> Stephen: YOU HAVE A DIFFERENT PERSONA WHEN YOU'RE ON

  • VACATION?

  • >> APPARENTLY.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

  • >> IT'S ALL ONE PHOTO.

  • IT'S TOO LATE TO GET IT, ISN'T IT?

  • I WANTED TO LOOK CUTE.

  • DO YOU HAVE IT?

  • >> Stephen: I HAVE THIS.

  • AMY GOT MARRIED.

  • >> Stephen: THIS IS AMY SCHUMER'S WEDDING AND YOU WERE

  • THERE.

  • >> YES.

  • >> Stephen: WHAT DO YOU LIKE AT THE WEDDING?

  • >> WELL, AMY SAID I SCARED PEOPLE.

  • >> Stephen: WHY WOULD THAT BE?

  • I DEFINITELY CAN'T TELL YOU.

  • I THINK IT WAS JUST A CONVERSATION.

  • >> Stephen: I THINK YOU HAVE TO.

  • >> NO, I CAN'T.

  • BRIDGET EVERETT AND I WERE TALKING ABOUT HOW MUCH WE LOVE

  • OUR JOBS AND -- >> Stephen: YOU AND WHO?

  • BRIDGET EVERETT AND I WERE TALKING ABOUT HOW MUCH WE LOVE

  • OUR DOGS AND I WENT TOO FAR TO SAY WHAT I WOULD DO TO MAKE MY

  • DOG HAPPY AND IT DIDN'T TRANSLATE AND WENT TOO FAR.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) I WAS FLIRTING WITH LARRY DAVID

  • ALL NIGHT BUT VERY ONE-SIDED.

  • I'M OBSESSED WITH HI, HE'S NOT OBSESSED WITH ME.

  • >> Stephen: HE'S DEAD.

  • WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT MAN?

  • >> AMY COMES AND GRABS ME AFTER THE CEREMONY AND SAYS LET'S GO

  • UP AND TALK ABOUT LIFE AND LOVE AND HER GIANT DECISION SHE MADE.

  • WE GO TO THE ROOF AND SHE'S TALKING.

  • AND I SAID, AMY, EVERY MINUTE I'M HERE, LARRY COULD BE LEAVING

  • AND SHE SAID YOU'RE AN UNENDING (BLEEP), BUT GO DOWNSTAIRS.

  • >> Stephen: DOES LARRY KNOW THIS CRUSH?

  • >> I FEEL LIKE -- UM, YES, BUT I DON'T HAVE HIS NUMBER AND HE

  • DOESN'T FLIRT BACK WITH ME WHICH IS JUST LIKE FUEL FOR ME.

  • THAT JUST GETS ME GOING.

  • >> Stephen: YOU LIKE A CHALLENGE?

  • >> YEAH.

  • I LOVE RUM!

  • BIG RUM GUY TURNS OUT.

  • I DIDN'T KNOW.

  • >> Stephen: SOMEWHERE IN AMERICA LARRY DAVID JUST DID

  • THIS!

  • ( LAUGHTER ) WE HAVE TO TAKE A LITTLE BREAK.

  • PLEASE SIT THERE.

  • WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

  • THANK YOU!

  • JENNIFER LAWRENCE!

WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW"!

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B1 中級 美國腔

詹妮弗-勞倫斯和斯蒂芬啟動他們的鞋子 (Jennifer Lawrence And Stephen Kick Off Their Shoes)

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    葉志中 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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