Girl, get it.

女孩們，接招吧

(neighing)

(馬的嘶叫)

What up everyone?

大家好嗎？

It's ya girl, Superwoman.

這是你的好朋友 Superwoman

Aight, so you feel bad because you keep

好的，所以你因為一直偷懶和

slacking and making the same mistake.

犯同樣的錯誤而感到難受

Listen I've been feeling really guilty.

聽著，我一直覺得很內疚，

And I just want to start by saying I'm sorry

我只想告訴你，我感到很抱歉

and I know you've heard this before but I am.

而且我知道我之前就曾經說過了，不過我真的是感到很抱歉

Um.

蛤？

I've been neglecting you and I don't want to.

我一直以來都忽略你，而我不想這樣

Okay.

好的

And I keep saying I want to make

而且我一直說我會為了你

time for you but then I don't.

騰出時間，但我沒有

Lilly, I don't feel any.

莉莉，我沒有感到任何

I just, I come home from work and I'm tired.

我只是，我工作回到家之後就很累，

You know, I'm tired.

你知道的，我累了

I really.

我真的

From now on, okay, when I come home,

好，從現在起，當我回到家

I'm gonna hold you with my hands.

我就會用我的雙手握住你

I'm gonna wrap my hands around you and I'm gonna lift you.

我會用我的雙手包圍住你而且我要把你舉起

Oh. I didn't realize you, I just thought we were friends.

噢，我沒有發現妳...我以為我們只是朋友

Move. What's happening to you?

走開啦，妳有事嗎？

I'm sorry.

對不起

It is a scientific fact that working

根據科學的論據，健身

out is practically impossible.

根本就是不可能的事

Earlier this month I heard my Spanx crying in the middle

這個月月初時我聽到我的 Spanx 塑身衣在

of the night and I felt bad enough to finally work out.

半夜時分哭泣，我感到很內疚所以我終於決定要健身

It took me about a week to prep for it.

我花了將近一個禮拜的時間做準備

Uh, what are you doing?

呃，妳在幹嘛？

Buying underwear to work out in.

買要健身時穿的內衣

Online?

在網路上？

Yeah. I'm too lazy to go in person

啊，我懶得去現場看，

so I figured like amazon.com/mycalvins son.

所以我想我就像 amazon.com/mycalvin 的孩子

Wait, hold on.

等一下，

Why do you need Calvin Klein underwear to work out in?

為什麼妳健身需要穿凱文克萊的內衣

Hello. Because I'm gonna be a fit person soon, okay?

哈囉，因為我很快就會變成一個身材健美的人好嗎？

And fit people always take pictures

所有身材健美的人都是穿著

with their Calvin Klein underwear band showing.

凱文克萊內衣，秀出褲頭照相的

Don't you stalk sexy people on Instagram?

妳都沒在追蹤 Instagram 上的性感人物嗎？

Wait. Hold on.

等一下，

One second.

等等，

Just because you're trying to work out

就因為妳開始要健身

that doesn't mean you're gonna become

不代表妳會成為

some kind of Instagram model or something.

Instagram 上的模特還是什麼的

You know what?

妳知道嗎？

I'm sick of you never believing in me, okay?

我受夠了妳從來就不相信我，好嗎？

You know what?

妳知道嗎？

Whatever. I can't.

隨便妳，我沒辦法

I have bad friends in my Calvins.

我在凱文克萊有很多厲害的朋友

Once I finally bought all the clothes and equipment

一旦我買齊了所有的衣服和裝備以後，

I needed and figured out like a cute hairstyle

我需要找到一個可愛的髮型

and made all these workout charts,

還要製作所有的鍛鍊圖表，

ooh got one of those like fancy water bottles,

哦還得買一個花俏的水瓶，

it was time to go beast mode.

是時候開啟野獸模式了

(upbeat music)

(輕快的音樂)

Are you kidding me?

是在和我開玩笑嗎？

It's too easy.

這超容易的

Okay. I could do like 100 of these.

很好，我可以至少做 100 下這個

All day.

一整天

I'm tired. I'm bored.

我厭煩了，好無聊

(upbeat music)

(輕快的音樂)

Day one. Easy.

第一天，沒問題

(upbeat music)

(輕快的音樂)

What are you doing?

妳在做什麼啊？

Um, hello, pushups you noob.

嗯，哈囉，我在做俯臥撐啊，菜鳥

You're doing them wrong.

妳做錯了，

You're supposed to do them on the ground not the wall.

妳應該在地上做而不是在牆壁上

Oh my god, how embarrassing.

哦我的天啊，真尷尬

There.

這樣

55.

55 下

56.

56 下

(upbeat music)

(輕快的音樂)

Yeah. Should be losing weight any minute now.

嗯，現在該是變瘦的時候了

Yo, for real though, those 14 minutes changed my life okay?

不過說真的，這 14 分鐘真的改變了我的人生好嗎？

I was a whole new person.

我是一個全新的人

(camera noise)

(照相機聲)

Hashtag gym life.

主題標籤「健身人生」

Yo. Get in here quick.

喂，趕快進來

Yo. Ask me which way the beach is girl.

喂，妳快問我海邊是在哪一個方向

I have a GPS.

我有一個導航器

Nah, you just jealous of my gains.

才不是，妳只是嫉妒我的收穫

You worked out once.

妳只健身過一次，

It doesn't happen that fast.

才不會那麼快看到成果

You know why you call these guns?

妳知道為什麼這叫做槍嗎？

These right here?

我在說這個，

Cause these are fire arms.

因為它們像是著了火的手臂

You literally look exactly the same.

妳看起來完全沒變啊

Yo. New year, new me.

喂，新年、嶄新的我

It's November.

現在是 11 月

I'm Blogilates.

我是 Blogilates

You know and it's like working out once

你知道，雖然只是健身過一次，

really changed the way I made choices

就好像真的改變了我做選擇的方式

and allow me to judge other people for theirs.

也讓我可以評斷他人的

Uh, I can't believe you put that filth into your body.

呃，我真不敢相信妳把那骯髒的東西吃下去

-Um, you eat donuts like every day.

呃，妳好像每一天都吃甜甜圈耶

Okay, that was before I started working out.

那是在我健身之前的事

Hello? Yeah, your body's a temple.

哈囉？是的，妳的身體是一座廟宇

Just saying.

我只是要提醒妳

Yo it even changed the way I talk.

那甚至改變了我說話的方式

Yo do you even lift bro?

大哥，你有在舉重嗎？

Um, lift for Lilly.

嗯，Lilly 的車

Yeah, that's me.

沒錯，就是我

Yo. Can we go to In-N-Out still?

我們還是可以去 In-N-Out 嗎？

And it turns out that working out once

事實證明，一次的鍛鍊

does in fact completely validate you.

就完全的產生效果

Yo. You follow my fitness blog yet?

喂，妳有沒有追蹤我的健身部落格？

Your what?

妳的什麼？

My fitness blog.

我的健身部落格啊

My last post was about skipping leg day.

我最新的文章是有關於跳繩的一天

You only worked out one day.

妳只健身過一天

Yeah. And it was leg day.

沒錯，就是跳繩的那一天

Okay. You know what?

好，妳知道嗎？

Lilly look, just because you started working out once

莉莉你聽著，就只因為妳開始鍛鍊過一次

doesn't make you some Instagram model or a fitness guru.

不表示妳就成為 Instagram 上的模特或是健身大師

You know what?

妳知道嗎 ？

I can't even stand people like you,

我根本無法忍受像妳這樣的人，

people who think they can get everything they want-

你們認為自己可以得到任何想要的東西

Yo. Did you see my new Calvin Klein campaign?

喂，妳有看到我的凱文克萊的新活動嗎？

What?

什麼？

Yeah. I'm a Calvin Klein model now.

是的，我現在是凱文克萊的模特

Check it out.

妳看

Underwear band.

內衣褲頭

Huh? Huh?

蛤？蛤？

Since when?

什麼時候開始的？

Since I started working out, silly.

笨蛋，從我開始健身的時候啊

So you mean yesterday?

所以妳是說從昨天？

Yeah. Can't you tell?

對啊，看不出來嗎？

This is totally a branded video.

這就是個品牌的影片啊

Oh.

喔

Yeah. I cash checks in my Calvins.

沒錯，我替凱文克萊工作

(cheerful music)

(快樂的音樂)

Yep. I use filters in my Calvins.

沒錯，我的凱文克萊照片有用濾鏡處理過

Hold on, big news.

等等，大消息

Guess what my next upload will start?

猜猜看我的下一部上傳影片什麼時候會開始？

Are you ready?

準備好了嗎？

Drumroll.

連續擊鼓聲

(high pitched drum roll noise)

(尖銳的連續擊鼓聲音)

12 collabs of Christmas.

12 部聖誕節合作影片

That's right, my very next upload

沒錯，我的下一部上傳影片

on Thursday, November 23 is gonna mark

會在星期四，11 月 23 日是

the start of 12 collabs of Christmas.

12 部聖誕節合作影片的開始

What the F does that mean?

那到底是什麼意思呢？

Let me tell you.

讓我告訴你，

12 surprise collaborations leading up to Christmas.

12 個驚喜的合作直到聖誕節

So over the next few weeks when all the people

所以在接下來的幾個星期裡當所有的人

are like why are you doing so many collabs?

都在想為什麼妳要做這麼多的合作影片？

It's 12 collabs of Christmas.

這就是 12 部聖誕節合作

12 collabs of Christmas.

12 部聖誕節合作影片

I'm so excited for all the little

我實在是太興奮了，

tricks I got up my sleeve.

我有很多的小妙計

I hope you enjoy.

我希望你們會喜歡

Now go to the end card.

現在先這樣了

Yo. If you like this video give it a big thumbs up.

如果你喜歡這支影片，給它一個讚

Shout out to Calvin Klein for

感謝凱文克萊和我

partnering with me on this video.

合作本支影片

My last one is right over there.

我的上一部片在那兒

Second vlog channel is there.

第二部影音部落格在那裡

Subscribe because I make new videos

敬請訂閱因為我在

every Monday and Thursday and even more leading up to

每個禮拜一和禮拜四都會有新的影片而且還有 12 部合作影片直到

Christmas for 12 collabs and I can not wait.

聖誕節，我等不及了！

One love Superwoman.

One love Superwoman

That is a wrap.

收工

And zoom.

閃