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  • I used to think

    我以前認為

  • the whole purpose of life was pursuing happiness.

    人生的目標就是追求快樂。

  • Everyone said the path to happiness was success,

    人人都說,成功是通往快樂的路,

  • so I searched for that ideal job,

    所以我去尋找理想的工作、

  • that perfect boyfriend, that beautiful apartment.

    完美的男友、漂亮的公寓。

  • But instead of ever feeling fulfilled,

    但我沒有感到圓滿,

  • I felt anxious and adrift.

    反而覺得焦慮跟漫無目的。

  • And I wasn't alone; my friends -- they struggled with this, too.

    且不只有我這樣;我的朋友們── 他們也有這種困擾。

  • Eventually, I decided to go to graduate school for positive psychology

    我最後決定去研究所讀正向心理學,

  • to learn what truly makes people happy.

    去找出什麼能讓人開心。

  • But what I discovered there changed my life.

    但我在那兒的發現, 改變了我的人生。

  • The data showed that chasing happiness can make people unhappy.

    資料顯示,追求快樂會讓人不快樂。

  • And what really struck me was this:

    真正讓我震驚的是這點:

  • the suicide rate has been rising around the world,

    全球的自殺率不斷攀升,

  • and it recently reached a 30-year high in America.

    最近在美國達到三十年來的新高。

  • Even though life is getting objectively better

    雖然客觀來說,生活變好了,

  • by nearly every conceivable standard,

    從每個能想到的標準來看皆是如此,

  • more people feel hopeless,

    卻有更多人感到無助、

  • depressed and alone.

    沮喪、及孤獨。

  • There's an emptiness gnawing away at people,

    有一種空虛感在侵蝕人們,

  • and you don't have to be clinically depressed to feel it.

    並不需被臨床診斷出沮喪 也能感覺到這個現象。

  • Sooner or later, I think we all wonder:

    我想,遲早我們都會想要知道:

  • Is this all there is?

    難道就只有這樣而已嗎?

  • And according to the research, what predicts this despair

    根據研究,絕望的原因

  • is not a lack of happiness.

    並不是缺乏快樂,

  • It's a lack of something else,

    而是缺乏某樣東西,

  • a lack of having meaning in life.

    是缺乏人生意義。

  • But that raised some questions for me.

    但這就讓我產生了一些問題。

  • Is there more to life than being happy?

    難道人生不只是要快樂嗎?

  • And what's the difference between being happy

    活得快樂和活得有意義

  • and having meaning in life?

    之間有什麼差別?

  • Many psychologists define happiness as a state of comfort and ease,

    許多心理學家把快樂定義為 一種舒服自在的狀態,

  • feeling good in the moment.

    在當下感覺很好。

  • Meaning, though, is deeper.

    而意義則更深。

  • The renowned psychologist Martin Seligman says

    知名心理學家馬丁賽里格曼說,

  • meaning comes from belonging to and serving something beyond yourself

    意義來自歸屬感、致力於 超越自我之外的事物,

  • and from developing the best within you.

    以及從內在發展出最好的自己。

  • Our culture is obsessed with happiness,

    我們的文化對「快樂」相當癡迷,

  • but I came to see that seeking meaning is the more fulfilling path.

    但我發現,尋找意義才是 更讓人滿足的道路。

  • And the studies show that people who have meaning in life,

    且研究指出,有人生意義的人

  • they're more resilient,

    適應力也會比較強,

  • they do better in school and at work,

    他們在學校及職場的表現較佳,

  • and they even live longer.

    他們甚至活得比較久。

  • So this all made me wonder:

    所以這一切讓我開始想,

  • How can we each live more meaningfully?

    我們每個人要如何活得有意義?

  • To find out, I spent five years interviewing hundreds of people

    為了找出答案,我花了五年時間,

  • and reading through thousands of pages of psychology,

    訪談了數百人,

  • neuroscience and philosophy.

    閱讀了數千頁的心理學、

  • Bringing it all together,

    神經科學、及哲學。

  • I found that there are what I call four pillars of a meaningful life.

    把這些彙整起來,我發現了一件事,

  • And we can each create lives of meaning

    我稱之為「人生意義的四大支柱」。

  • by building some or all of these pillars in our lives.

    我們可以彼此相互建立起這些支柱,

  • The first pillar is belonging.

    在彼此的人生中找到人生的意義。

  • Belonging comes from being in relationships

    第一根支柱是歸屬感。

  • where you're valued for who you are intrinsically

    歸屬感來自於一種關係,

  • and where you value others as well.

    一種你與他人在本質上 彼此是否處在

  • But some groups and relationships deliver a cheap form of belonging;

    相互珍惜的關係中。

  • you're valued for what you believe,

    但有些群體或關係, 提供的是廉價形式的歸屬感;

  • for who you hate,

    你被重視的原因 是因為你所相信的事物、

  • not for who you are.

    你對人的好惡、

  • True belonging springs from love.

    而不是你的本質。

  • It lives in moments among individuals,

    真正的歸屬感源自於愛。

  • and it's a choice -- you can choose to cultivate belonging with others.

    它存在於個體間共處的時光當中,

  • Here's an example.

    且它是一種選擇── 你可以選擇與他人培養歸屬感。

  • Each morning, my friend Jonathan buys a newspaper

    舉例來說,

  • from the same street vendor in New York.

    每天早晨,我在紐約的朋友強納森

  • They don't just conduct a transaction, though.

    都會向同一個街頭小販買一份報紙。

  • They take a moment to slow down, talk,

    不過,他們並不是只有交易的關係。

  • and treat each other like humans.

    他們會停下來,花點時間說說話,

  • But one time, Jonathan didn't have the right change,

    把彼此當朋友對待。

  • and the vendor said,

    但有一次,強納森的零錢不夠,

  • "Don't worry about it."

    小販說:

  • But Jonathan insisted on paying,

    「沒關係不用了啦。」

  • so he went to the store and bought something he didn't need

    但強納森堅持要付錢,

  • to make change.

    所以他去一家店, 買了他不需要的東西,

  • But when he gave the money to the vendor,

    把鈔票找開。

  • the vendor drew back.

    但當他把錢給小販時,

  • He was hurt.

    小販退縮了。

  • He was trying to do something kind,

    他感到受傷。

  • but Jonathan had rejected him.

    他試著想表現友好,

  • I think we all reject people in small ways like this without realizing it.

    但強納森拒絕了他。

  • I do.

    我想,我們都曾像這樣在小地方 拒絕別人卻沒有意識到。

  • I'll walk by someone I know and barely acknowledge them.

    我就有過。

  • I'll check my phone when someone's talking to me.

    我會從認識的人旁邊走過, 卻沒跟他們打招呼。

  • These acts devalue others.

    當有人在跟我說話時,我會看手機。

  • They make them feel invisible and unworthy.

    這類行為是在貶低別人的價值,

  • But when you lead with love, you create a bond

    讓他們覺得自己是 隱形的、不值得的。

  • that lifts each of you up.

    但若用愛來引導, 你就會創造出一種聯結,

  • For many people, belonging is the most essential source of meaning,

    讓你們彼此都振奮起來。

  • those bonds to family and friends.

    對很多人來說,歸屬感是 人生意義的重要來源,

  • For others, the key to meaning is the second pillar: purpose.

    就是與家人及朋友之間的聯結。

  • Now, finding your purpose is not the same thing

    對其他人來說, 第二根人生意義的支柱是目的。

  • as finding that job that makes you happy.

    找到你的目的並不是指找到

  • Purpose is less about what you want than about what you give.

    讓你快樂的工作。

  • A hospital custodian told me her purpose is healing sick people.

    目的的重點是你能給予什麼, 而不是你想要什麼。

  • Many parents tell me,

    一位醫院管理員告訴我, 她的目的是治癒生病的人。

  • "My purpose is raising my children."

    很多家長告訴我:

  • The key to purpose is using your strengths to serve others.

    「我的目的是扶養我的孩子。」

  • Of course, for many of us, that happens through work.

    目標的關鍵在於 用你的力量去服務他人。

  • That's how we contribute and feel needed.

    當然,對很多人而言, 這是透過工作來達成的。

  • But that also means that issues like disengagement at work,

    那是我們做出貢獻和 感到被需要的方式。

  • unemployment,

    但這也意味著,像是 無心工作、失業、

  • low labor force participation --

    低勞動參與率等等議題──

  • these aren't just economic problems, they're existential ones, too.

    這些不僅是經濟問題, 也是存在主義問題。

  • Without something worthwhile to do,

    人們若沒有值得去做的事,

  • people flounder.

    就會掙扎折騰。

  • Of course, you don't have to find purpose at work,

    當然,你不需要從工作中找到目的,

  • but purpose gives you something to live for,

    但目的能讓你有活下去的意義,

  • some "why" that drives you forward.

    有驅使你向前行的「理由」。

  • The third pillar of meaning is also about stepping beyond yourself,

    第三根人生意義的支柱, 也和走出自我有關,

  • but in a completely different way:

    但用的方式完全不同:

  • transcendence.

    超然。

  • Transcendent states are those rare moments

    超然的狀態是很少見的時刻,

  • when you're lifted above the hustle and bustle of daily life,

    在這個時刻中,你超脫了 日常生活的喧囂擾攘,

  • your sense of self fades away,

    自我感正在漸漸消褪,

  • and you feel connected to a higher reality.

    你會感覺到和更高的現實產生連結。

  • For one person I talked to, transcendence came from seeing art.

    跟我談過的其中一個人說, 超然來自於欣賞藝術。

  • For another person, it was at church.

    另一個人則認為,超然是在教堂中。

  • For me, I'm a writer, and it happens through writing.

    對我來說,我是作家, 而超然是透過寫作發生的。

  • Sometimes I get so in the zone that I lose all sense of time and place.

    有時候我太投入 會有一種忘我的境界。

  • These transcendent experiences can change you.

    這些超然的經驗能改變你。

  • One study had students look up at 200-feet-tall eucalyptus trees

    有一項研究是讓學生去看 200 英呎高的尤加利樹,

  • for one minute.

    看一分鐘,

  • But afterwards they felt less self-centered,

    之後他們會比較不自我中心,

  • and they even behaved more generously

    若給他們機會去幫助別人,

  • when given the chance to help someone.

    他們連行為都會變得更慷慨。

  • Belonging, purpose, transcendence.

    歸屬感、目的、超然。

  • Now, the fourth pillar of meaning, I've found,

    接著談談我發現的第四根支柱,

  • tends to surprise people.

    它常會令人感到驚訝。

  • The fourth pillar is storytelling,

    第四根支柱就是說故事,

  • the story you tell yourself about yourself.

    你告訴你自己關於你自己的故事。

  • Creating a narrative from the events of your life brings clarity.

    用你人生中的事件來創造 一個故事,能讓你看得更清楚。

  • It helps you understand how you became you.

    它能協助你了解你是怎麼變成你的。

  • But we don't always realize that we're the authors of our stories

    但我們通常沒發現, 我們故事的作者就是自己,

  • and can change the way we're telling them.

    且我們可以改變說故事的方式。

  • Your life isn't just a list of events.

    你的生命並不只一連串的事件。

  • You can edit, interpret and retell your story,

    即便你被事實給限制住, 你仍可以編輯、

  • even as you're constrained by the facts.

    詮釋、再重新述說你的故事。

  • I met a young man named Emeka, who'd been paralyzed playing football.

    我遇到一位叫做埃梅卡的年輕人, 他因為打美式足球而癱瘓。

  • After his injury, Emeka told himself,

    埃梅卡在受傷後, 內心的對話是這樣的:

  • "My life was great playing football,

    「我打美式足球的人生是非常棒的,

  • but now look at me."

    但看看現在的我。」

  • People who tell stories like this --

    像這樣說故事的人──

  • "My life was good. Now it's bad." --

    「我的人生曾經很棒, 現在卻很糟。」──

  • tend to be more anxious and depressed.

    說這種故事的人 比較容易焦慮和沮喪。

  • And that was Emeka for a while.

    埃梅卡有好一陣子就是這樣。

  • But with time, he started to weave a different story.

    但隨時間過去,他開始 編造一個不同的故事。

  • His new story was,

    他的新故事是:

  • "Before my injury, my life was purposeless.

    「在我受傷前,我的人生沒有目的。

  • I partied a lot and was a pretty selfish guy.

    我常去派對,且我是個很自私的人。

  • But my injury made me realize I could be a better man."

    但受傷讓我明白, 我可以成為更好的人。」

  • That edit to his story changed Emeka's life.

    埃梅卡把他的故事進行改造, 從而改變了他的一生。

  • After telling the new story to himself,

    在對自己說完這個新故事之後,

  • Emeka started mentoring kids,

    埃梅卡開始開導孩童,

  • and he discovered what his purpose was:

    他找到了他的目的:

  • serving others.

    服務他人。

  • The psychologist Dan McAdams calls this a "redemptive story,"

    心理學家丹麥亞當斯稱這 現象為「救贖的故事」,

  • where the bad is redeemed by the good.

    用好的來救贖不好的。

  • People leading meaningful lives, he's found,

    他發現,過著有意義人生的人,

  • tend to tell stories about their lives

    他們說的故事內容通常都是

  • defined by redemption, growth and love.

    他們的人生由救贖、 成長、愛來定義。

  • But what makes people change their stories?

    但,是什麼讓人們 改變了他們的故事?

  • Some people get help from a therapist,

    有些人向治療師尋求協助,

  • but you can do it on your own, too,

    但你也可以靠自己做到,

  • just by reflecting on your life thoughtfully,

    只要完整地反思你的人生、

  • how your defining experiences shaped you,

    你的關鍵經驗如何造就了你、

  • what you lost, what you gained.

    你失去了什麼、獲得了什麼。

  • That's what Emeka did.

    那就是埃梅卡所做的。

  • You won't change your story overnight;

    你不可能一夜就改變你的故事;

  • it could take years and be painful.

    過程可能要花好幾年,且很痛苦。

  • After all, we've all suffered, and we all struggle.

    畢竟,我們都曾受過苦, 也都在掙扎。

  • But embracing those painful memories can lead to new insights and wisdom,

    但擁抱那些痛苦的記憶, 能帶來新的洞見與智慧,

  • to finding that good that sustains you.

    讓你能找到那支撐著你的「善」。

  • Belonging, purpose, transcendence, storytelling:

    歸屬感、目的、超然、說故事;

  • those are the four pillars of meaning.

    這些就是意義的四大支柱。

  • When I was younger,

    在我小時候,

  • I was lucky enough to be surrounded by all of the pillars.

    我很幸運能夠被 這四根支柱給圍繞著。

  • My parents ran a Sufi meetinghouse from our home in Montreal.

    我父母在蒙特婁的家附近 開一間蘇菲派的聚會所。

  • Sufism is a spiritual practice associated with the whirling dervishes

    蘇菲教派是一種和 旋轉苦行僧及詩人魯米

  • and the poet Rumi.

    有關的靈修。

  • Twice a week, Sufis would come to our home

    每週兩次,蘇菲教徒會到我們家裡,

  • to meditate, drink Persian tea, and share stories.

    來冥想、喝波斯茶、分享故事。

  • Their practice also involved serving all of creation

    他們的修行也涉及了 要透過愛的小舉動,

  • through small acts of love,

    來為萬物服務,

  • which meant being kind even when people wronged you.

    也就是說,即使別人冤枉你, 也要仁慈以對。

  • But it gave them a purpose: to rein in the ego.

    但那給了他們一個目的: 去駕馭自我。

  • Eventually, I left home for college

    最後,我離開家去讀大學,

  • and without the daily grounding of Sufism in my life,

    我的人生中少了蘇菲教徒 每天的基礎練習,

  • I felt unmoored.

    感覺像是船的纜繩被解開。

  • And I started searching for those things that make life worth living.

    我開始尋找有什麼 能讓我的人生值得活。

  • That's what set me on this journey.

    就是這個原因讓我踩上這段旅程。

  • Looking back, I now realize

    現在回頭看,我發現

  • that the Sufi house had a real culture of meaning.

    那間蘇菲房舍有著一種 有意義的真實文化。

  • The pillars were part of the architecture,

    那些支柱是建築的一部份,

  • and the presence of the pillars helped us all live more deeply.

    而支柱的出現,讓我們都能 過更有深度的生活。

  • Of course, the same principle applies

    當然,同樣的原則也適用於

  • in other strong communities as well --

    其他強大的社群──

  • good ones and bad ones.

    好的和壞的都包含在內。

  • Gangs, cults:

    幫派、邪教:

  • these are cultures of meaning that use the pillars

    這些也是有意義的文化,

  • and give people something to live and die for.

    它們利用這些支柱, 給予人們活著和犧牲的意義。

  • But that's exactly why we as a society

    但那就是為什麼, 我們身為一個社會,

  • must offer better alternatives.

    必須要提供更好的替代方案。

  • We need to build these pillars within our families and our institutions

    我們需要在我們的家庭及 習俗制度當中建立這些支柱,

  • to help people become their best selves.

    來協助人們變成最好的自己。

  • But living a meaningful life takes work.

    但一定要花心力, 才能讓人生過得有意義。

  • It's an ongoing process.

    它是一個持續的過程。

  • As each day goes by, we're constantly creating our lives,

    隨著每一天過去, 我們不斷地創造我們的人生,

  • adding to our story.

    擴增我們的故事。

  • And sometimes we can get off track.

    有時,我們可能會誤入歧途。

  • Whenever that happens to me,

    每當我遇到這狀況時,

  • I remember a powerful experience I had with my father.

    我會想起我與父親的一段經歷, 很有影響力的經歷。

  • Several months after I graduated from college,

    我從大學畢業後幾個月,

  • my dad had a massive heart attack that should have killed him.

    我父親罹患了嚴重的心臟病, 本來他應該性命難保。

  • He survived, and when I asked him what was going through his mind

    他活下來了,我問他, 當他在面對死亡時,

  • as he faced death,

    腦中想著的是什麼,

  • he said all he could think about was needing to live

    他說,他唯一能想的, 就是必須活下來,

  • so he could be there for my brother and me,

    這樣他才能陪伴我弟弟和我,

  • and this gave him the will to fight for life.

    這點讓他有意志力能拼命活下來。

  • When he went under anesthesia for emergency surgery,

    當他被麻醉準備接受緊急手術時,

  • instead of counting backwards from 10,

    他做的不是從 10 開始倒數,

  • he repeated our names like a mantra.

    他把我們的名字像祈禱文般地覆頌。

  • He wanted our names to be the last words he spoke on earth

    如果他會死,他希望他 在世上說的最後幾個字

  • if he died.

    是我們的名字。

  • My dad is a carpenter and a Sufi.

    我的父親是個木匠也是個蘇菲教徒。

  • It's a humble life,

    他的人生是謙恭的人生,

  • but a good life.

    但很美好的人生。

  • Lying there facing death, he had a reason to live:

    躺在那裡,面對死亡, 他有一個活下去的理由:

  • love.

    愛。

  • His sense of belonging within his family,

    他在他的家庭中的歸屬感、

  • his purpose as a dad,

    他身為一名父親的目的、

  • his transcendent meditation, repeating our names --

    他超然的冥想, 不斷覆頌我們的名字──

  • these, he says, are the reasons why he survived.

    他說,這些是他活下來的原因。

  • That's the story he tells himself.

    那是他告訴他自己的故事。

  • That's the power of meaning.

    那就是意義的力量。

  • Happiness comes and goes.

    快樂來來去去。

  • But when life is really good

    但當人生真的很美好時,

  • and when things are really bad,

    當事情真的很糟糕時,

  • having meaning gives you something to hold on to.

    若人生有意義,你就會有 可以緊緊抓住的東西。

  • Thank you.

    謝謝。

  • (Applause)

    (掌聲)

I used to think

我以前認為

字幕與單字

影片操作 你可以在這邊進行「影片」的調整,以及「字幕」的顯示

B1 中級 中文 美國腔 TED 人生 意義 歸屬感 故事 目的

TED】Emily Esfahani Smith:生活比快樂更重要(生活比快樂更重要|Emily Esfahani Smith)。 (【TED】Emily Esfahani Smith: There's more to life than being happy (There's more to life than being happy | Emily Esfahani Smith))

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    Pei 發佈於 2021 年 01 月 14 日