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So I was on the today show on Friday as a,
I am (there) every couple of weeks for those of you that watch.
The only difference was, in this particular performance.
they asked me a question and I said,
"Oh, there are three things that I normally say in response to this question."
And I went, "Number one, blah blah blah." A really good answer.
"Number two..." And I completely forgot.
How did she do it, Matthew?
This someone who's gotta enjoy your love life again,
and I have three ways of doing that,
especially on Valentines.
One, stop idealizing other people's crappy relationships.
Haha, that's so true!
Just 'cause someone is in a relationship, it doesn't make them happier than you are.
That's good, I like that one, check.
Secondly, make sure that, when you...
What was number two?
You lost it.
You know what's funny? I knew you lost it when you started that.
I got too much laughter on number one.
I was soaking up the validation.
Now, alright.
Here's the second thing.
Make sure that when you go out with your guy.
No, I lost it.
OK, let's move on.
Lisa has been married for almost twenty six years...
This would have been years ago, a really horrific embarrassing moment for me.
It's was my, literally would have been my worst nightmare,
going on TV in live forgetting what I was going to say.
Except, it wasn't.
It wasn't a bad situation at all.
I laughed it off, they laughed it off.
It became a kind of a funny part of the segment.
There's a quote I really enjoy, and that's that,
"Life is ten percent what happens
and ninety percent how you react to what happens."
I'm a big believer in the idea that so many people make mistakes,
and it's not the mistake that ruins them,
it's the way they react to their mistake that ruins them.
They either have an overblown reaction which draws so much attention to it,
it's crazy,
or, they decide never to do that again.
I made a mistake, I'm never doing that again.
It's was embarrassing, I don't want to embarrass myself again.
And that's the thing that hinders them.
It's not the mistake, it's their lack of action after the mistake.
So I want to give you three things to remember when you make your next mistake.
One, remember that you're not that special when you make a mistake.
Other people are making mistakes too all the time.
Am I the only person who's ever forgot what they were gonna say on TV?
Of course not.
It happens all the time.
I'm not special for making that mistake.
I shouldn't indulge and get all,
playing a violin for myself, and I'm the victim, I can't believe it, I'm such an idiot.
That would be to make myself too special.
Everyone makes mistakes all the time.
Once we realize that, we can be humbled by that, and go,
"It's OK, I'm just like everyone else."
Number two, don't...
F**k.
Number two, don't overreact.
Many of us make a mistake, and then we overreact to the mistake.
When we overreact to the mistake, it draws attention to it.
When it draws attention to it, other people think there must be some gravitas to the mistake.
Number three, get on to the next thing.
A mistake is one little moment in the whole timeline of everything that you do.
If you keep going, you'll be measured on your averages,
and quality always wins.
You may have made a mistake right now,
but just get on to doing the next thing you do well,
so that you'll now be remembered for something different.
In other words, just stick another layer on top of it.
That mistake is just one layer right now.
Put another layer on top of it,
and then another layer on top of that.
I don't know how many of you watched West Wing,
but I watched West Wing,
and the president in West Wing,
played by the wonderful Martin Sheen,
he always used to say at the end of a meeting,
at the end of a problem solving session,
he'd say, "What's next?"
And it always stuck with me the simplicity of the phrase "What's next?"
Because anytime something happens,
once you've drawn a line under it, you've drawn a line under it,
and that's where you go.
You say, "What's next?"
Life is long.
People talk about life being short,
but in many ways, life is long.
There's a lot of potential along the way to be a success,
to do things great.
There's also a lot of potential along the way to screw up.
We're all gonna screw up in this life,
and we're gonna screw up a lot,
especially if we're out there playing the game.
If we're out there doing things,
we are bound to screw up a lot.
Get OK with that, make that OK in your mind.
And remember, you're gonna be hurt more by your reactions to your mistake,
than you'll be hurt by the mistakes themselves.
If you are not signed up to my newsletter right now,
go do that.
We're constantly putting out new videos, new articles.
Especially my brother's articles as well,
which are getting a lot of attention out there right now.
Sign up to the mailing list.
Go to howtogettheguy.com/advice.
All you need to do is put in your name and Email address,
and you'll get all of that information.
Alright guys, I will see you soon
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別再自怨自艾!戀愛教練三步驟教你走出犯錯低潮 (How To Not Let Your Mistakes Ruin You)

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Jerry 發佈於 2017 年 11 月 1 日    Jerry 翻譯    黃艾瑄 審核
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